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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

13 week old baby and pregnant again

35 replies

mummybof2 · 07/06/2022 19:58

Hello,

Yesterday I got a really faint line on a test and retested with a CBD at night which confirmed “pregnant”.

I have an older child at 7 and a 13 week old baby. I’m absolutely terrified how I will cope, I’m also quite scared of how my family will react especially my Mum.

My 13 week old has been a really unsettled baby and I’ve often required my Mum’s help when my DH is working away (hence why I’m scared of her reaction)

Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

13 week old baby and pregnant again
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Peppapig7262662 · 07/06/2022 20:00

Hello OP, I was in a similar situation.

Dd1 was 13 and DD2 6 months when I fell pregnant again. I decided it wasn't the right time and had an abortion.

Have you thought about your options?

Regenbogen22 · 07/06/2022 20:01

Was it a contraception failure or were you just not using any?

Original poster
mummybof2 · 07/06/2022 20:02

I have thought of my options but I just don’t know if I’d be able to go through with an abortion. We did want one more just not this soon.

OP posts:
Original poster
mummybof2 · 07/06/2022 20:03

I’m on the mini pill but I did forget to take it 2 days in a row.

OP posts:
madeinthe80z · 07/06/2022 20:26

Remember that most babies are 'unsettled' in those early months. Don't try and imagine your life NOW with another baby. I can't imagine how scared and shocked you are, good luck 🤞

1ce1cebaby · 07/06/2022 20:34

I am. I will have two babies under 1. Can’t comment on what it’s like yet as I’m only 19 weeks. I suspect it will be super busy that’s for sure but I’m excited and think in the long term it will be good having them close together!

ittakes2 · 07/06/2022 20:34

My mother was very fertile and had a few of us like that - by the time she was 28 she had five children under eight years old. But when I had my twins she said she felt it was harder to look after twins than the five under eight. Its not what you want and might be tricky for a few years but in the long run it might be better to have your last two close together since there is a such a big gap with your eldest.

LilacPoppy · 07/06/2022 20:38

Yes, I was breastfeeding twins and was pregnant again by the time they were 10 weeks old. It was fine , when ds2 was born i had two babies so one born just slotted in. I also had a 2 year old and 3 almost 4 year old, plus a couple of older dc so it didn’t seem like a big deal adding one more.

beansprout55 · 07/06/2022 20:42

Yes, don't try to imagine life with another newborn now! It will be totally manageable to have a newborn when your current bubba is 1. It's not uncommon at all xx

beansprout55 · 07/06/2022 20:43

And don't worry about what family think! Gosh, they'll probably be happy and just as shocked as you are! It's not a bad thing at all!!!xxx

Original poster
mummybof2 · 07/06/2022 20:46

Thanks everyone for your replies, I feel a lot more settled now reading through them.

I guess it’s just a daunting thought but we somehow always get there don’t we?

Now on how to break it to my Mum, you’d think I was a child & we do have the best relationship but I’m just unsure on what she will say…

OP posts:
maddiemookins16mum · 07/06/2022 20:59

mummybof2 · 07/06/2022 20:46

Thanks everyone for your replies, I feel a lot more settled now reading through them.

I guess it’s just a daunting thought but we somehow always get there don’t we?

Now on how to break it to my Mum, you’d think I was a child & we do have the best relationship but I’m just unsure on what she will say…

Don’t tell her (yet). Give yourself time first.

Cookiecrumble22 · 07/06/2022 21:20

There is 13 months between my 2. The older one has special needs he did mot walk until 20 months. Feels very similar to twins . I often forget they are different ages. Managing wise if was not to bad. You just get on with it things tend to fall into place. My 3 are 6 and 7 now so it was a while back. But they ate the best of friends and love each other so much .

VanillaIce1 · 07/06/2022 21:22

I had 2 18 months apart it was like having twins except one was big one was tiny.
It was hard for the first few weeks adjusting but so worth it now. They are best friends now and stick by each other all the time and help one another especially in school.

It's also nice seeing them talk away and play together and it wasn't a bad idea tbh to have them so close.

worriedaboutmoney2022 · 07/06/2022 21:31

@mummybof2

You have to do what's right for you but for me personally it would have been hell I have 3 years between mine!

Also I certainly wasn't feeling up to sex when my baby was that small either I was totally exhausted and drained both times!! So wouldn't have occurred

But even If it did theres nothing wrong with a termination if that's right for you.

Some of my friends have 2 very close together and it's great as they're good playmates but then affording childcare until then3 year funding is a
Nightmare

nearlyspringyay · 07/06/2022 22:00

VanillaIce1 · 07/06/2022 21:22

I had 2 18 months apart it was like having twins except one was big one was tiny.
It was hard for the first few weeks adjusting but so worth it now. They are best friends now and stick by each other all the time and help one another especially in school.

It's also nice seeing them talk away and play together and it wasn't a bad idea tbh to have them so close.

It's nothing like having twins. I have twins and as they've got older it's been easier than having different aged kids but baby twins are nothing like an 18mo and a baby.

ChagSameachDoreen · 07/06/2022 23:26

Regenbogen22 · 07/06/2022 20:01

Was it a contraception failure or were you just not using any?

What's this got to do with anything?

Flederjo · 08/06/2022 06:41

ChagSameachDoreen · 07/06/2022 23:26

What's this got to do with anything?

Show quote history

Perhaps because it wasn't clear in the OP whether it was somewhat "planned" i.e. "let's see what happens" or a total surprise due to contraception failure? Wasn't clear to me either.
I found it an interesting question because so many threads on here recently have been about struggles to conceive whilst breastfeeding! Good to know that these things can still happen!

VanillaIce1 · 08/06/2022 07:46

@nearlyspringyay In my experience it was, so please don't tell me that my experience wasn't like that. I am a parent of actual twins and it was more a less the same. Both demanding, both didn't sleep through, both on milk and both needed changing more a less the same time. Thanks 😊

Herejustforthisone · 08/06/2022 08:37

1ce1cebaby · 07/06/2022 20:34

I am. I will have two babies under 1. Can’t comment on what it’s like yet as I’m only 19 weeks. I suspect it will be super busy that’s for sure but I’m excited and think in the long term it will be good having them close together!

Two under one?? Crikey. Will they be in the same school year? 😬

I’m pondering a second one but if I’m honest, I can’t be arsed to go through it all again. My first is a toddler now and is such an easy kid that I don’t want to risk the next one being a PITA. So I might not bother. But I do sometimes wish I’d just not hung about and got it done while life was already a bit shit with a baby.

Herejustforthisone · 08/06/2022 08:40

LilacPoppy · 07/06/2022 20:38

Yes, I was breastfeeding twins and was pregnant again by the time they were 10 weeks old. It was fine , when ds2 was born i had two babies so one born just slotted in. I also had a 2 year old and 3 almost 4 year old, plus a couple of older dc so it didn’t seem like a big deal adding one more.

How many do you have in total? That sounds veeeery busy.

Kendodd · 08/06/2022 08:44

I had three very close together and I'm sure it was absolutely nothing like having twins. I don't know why anyone would say that. The needs of a newborn are very different to the needs of a one year old.
Anyway, back to the OP.
Congratulations!
It'll be fine.

Mommabear20 · 08/06/2022 08:47

There's 13 months between my 2 (currently 23 months and 10 months) and I'm 14 weeks with our 3rd 😂 first 2 were planned close but not this one! It's crazy busy with 2 under 2, but babies grow and progress soooo much in the first year, so it really wasn't as hard as we thought it was going to be.
A routine is a definite must though! Having our DD in a routine for eating, sleeping and playing before baby DS arrived, meant that she didn't really notice much difference in her day to day life (other than having someone to poke in the pushchair! 😂)

Seraphinesupport · 08/06/2022 09:04

I have a 3 and 4 year old, 11 months between them. I wont lie Its so difficult.

tripledose · 08/06/2022 09:38

I was in the same situation and I opted for a termination because I didn't feel I could do it all again so soon and was worried that I would miss key moments of my older child's development caring for a newborn. Whatever option you go with there will be pros and cons, but don't forget you have options and you can choose what you want your life to look like.