BFPs following IVF to take symptoms & scans

[Justawannabemam]

Hi everyone.

I've started this group for us to chat about our symptoms, scans and any other pregancy related issues after getting a BFP following IVF/IUI/ICSI.

It is by no means to leave anyone out of the previous groups we have been in, where we all offer advice and help during an IVF cycle.

We all know hearing people's positive pregancy news can be heart breaking. I just found on the group that we are talking scans, symptoms, signs and positive tests I'm very conscious that those currently mid cycle may get upset.

We can all still give advice but maybe we could use this group as our pregnancies progress.

I've tagged who I remember from the last group, please feel free to add others as they join us on this next phase of our journey or if I have missed anyone.

@W1ngingit
@Millymillymillymillymilly
@womaninkent
@xreadytoglow
@Bluehawaii29
@Bryterlayter1

@Bluehawaii29 9 weeks tomorrow is good. Do you have your 12 week scan booked in? Mine isn't until 13 weeks. At the moment I'm focusing on being able to stop the pessaries in 2 weeks - I can't wait. I'm wondering if all my bloating will suddenly go. I've had to buy new trousers as none of mine fit.

@2mumlife that's very upsetting about the lack of chocolate. I've gone off chocolate a bit so will probably only have a bit. I'm looking forward to hot cross buns. I've got quite a few family events going on from today to Monday - I've been doing very little recently and a bit worried about my nausea and being really tired (which makes it worse)

@Justawannabemam Agree a consultant shouldn't say it's a disaster - it really isn't.

My sister had twins naturally and her pregnancy was very good and actually she had to be induced at 41 weeks as the babies were so happy in her tummy.

@Overlyanxious I've found on quite a few different groups that all clinics are different. I think I just struck gold with ours.

I've sat looking at 4 easter eggs for about 2 weeks now. I'm just off the gym and then im coming home for a hot cross bun and half an some chocolate. X

We have our dating scan on Thursday then it's buy buy buy time. I've had my eye on a few things just been waiting to check all is okay . They have those nest pillows in aldi if anyones looking and my MIL informs me there is a baby event coming up soon. .

Have a lovely weekend everyone .x

@2mumlife no chocolate :-( can you take some gaviscon hah.

I'm gluten free and have been indulging in croissants and it's made my digestion so yuck. Wish they did gluten free croissants

@2mumlife aww yeah can’t wait to see it develop further, last scan at 8+2 weeks was pretty cool though. Yeah I know my husband got me a Malteser rabbit and keeps saying don’t forget you got that but doesn’t really excite me the thought of having chocolate. Don’t think I’m going to enjoy it much but will still be a nice holiday in the sun and have a few things planned so looking forward to freedom from tomorrow x

@Overlyanxious heyy just seen your message. Have my first midwife appt next weds and a scan at ivf clinic which was moved to 9wk+4 because of all the scans I’d been doing with EPU before that. Excited to see more detail on that one. Would be good when I find out date for 12 week scan. Yes I am 1 week behind you so 3 weeks of meds left for me but equally excited about stopping! can’t wait to be able to go out for a whole day and not worry x

@Justawannabemam oh that’s really good to know, yes I am thinking of starting as late as possible. Really don’t like the idea of taking a blood thinner x

Second beta 7190. Its official! I almost passed out waiting for the results I was so nervous 😩

I am so relieved but I am also a bit worried about how stressed I get, the clinic has a psychology service and I think I'm gonna use it to help me navigate these two weeks before the 7 weeks scan, I feel I have PTSD from my blighted ovum and other circumstances that happened around that time (the mc lead to the break up with my ex partner and I felt like such a failure)

Is anyone seeing a psychologist? Do you find it helps?

@2mumlife we are a family with twins in both sides, so although I know the risks I also know a healthy twin pregnancy is very possible.

My doctor advised against transferring too but bc is their duty. A twin pregnancy has more risks so its their duty to advice a single transfer. But at the end of the day it was my body, our embryos, our choice. Its not like asking for 5.

I worked in the fertility field for years (in operations not as a clinician) so Im familiar with the % of success. We felt 2 was the best choice for our family, specially having 4 more good blastocyst.

With that we are aware we need to be on top of my health and blood levels more than with a single pregnancy, and we are committed to do that. We normally live in Barbados but if it turns out a twin pregnancy we will go back to Europe (where I am at the moment) to make sure we are near the best healthcare possible (i love barbados but theres only 1 hospital) if there is any issue.

@bajanbump hi congrats, yes I get like you as well and spoke to my GP on Monday. He referred me to the perinatal mental health team. They will be able to help you and have so much support. They already contacted me twice since weds and have been really friendly and understanding. Feel so much lighter already. Definitely recommend. I also used pregnancy matters charity help line which is free and they spent a lot of time talking to me and helping me with my thoughts. This is the number if you are interested. They pick up very fast and lovely bunch of ladies. 0808 802 5433

@bajanbump oh that's a good result. I hope you can relax a bit.
Yes I do get anxiety and such, I had talking therapy in my last pregnancy and am feeling like it would help me this time round.

I think it’s really bad how we don’t get the help following ivf cycle working. Just left to navigate everything yourself. I had mine through nhs and they said to me our job is just to make you pregnant. We dont deal with anything else. All this time I’ve felt so alone. Just can’t believe how they think we would be ok when it’s been so hard to get to this point. It would drive anyone to go crazy

@xreadytoglow, @Overlyanxious, @JMC91, @Bluehawaii29, @2mumlife, I think I have tagged you in properly - thank you for the kind messages they were reassuring.

Unfortunately I think I am miscarrying - woke up this morning with heavy bleeding, painful cramps, passed a large clot and all pregnancy symptoms have disappeared. The nurse was kind and said this can happen to women and their pregnancy was still fine, however I have lost hope and I think it's all over.

@Bluehawaii29 @JMC91 thank you! Ive booked an appointment with the psychologist already for next week.

Right now im just paranoid all the stress I went through today (results and some stuff from work) could harm my baby/ies which is stupid bc I get anxious again 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I am just laying in the sofa right now trying to chill and watch netflix 🤣🤣🤣

@wantingeasylife oh darling. I hope that the nurses are right and it's just one of those things that can happen and still be ok.

Sending you lots of love, have you plenty of support around you? Xx

@wantingeasylife sorry I missed your post when I was adding mine.

I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. I know by my own experience there's nothing anyone can say that can make you feel better now, so just feel everything you need to feel and take it one day at a time.

Sending you big hugs

@Justawannabemam Definitely a different kettle of fish if you concieve naturally - no one can control multiples in those instances. And like everything, there will be some for who the prengnacy is absolutely fine, and some who will have significant complications. Hoping all the ladies on here are in the first group :)

@Overlyanxious I sometimes found I could handle the nausea better when I had to, but was really tired the next day after doing it. Hopefully though you'll find the energy to have a great weekend (and lots of hot cross buns will keep the energy levels up perhaps :) )

@Bluehawaii29 Hopefully you feel up to the rabbit soon and have a great weekend. I didn't get my 12 week scan appointment until after the booking in appoitment if that helps (but it seems really different in different areas). I think the lack of follow up care post-viability scan seems to be pretty universal regardless of NHS/private clinic. Its is tough though when you have bleeding or other worrying symptoms (or lack of symptoms! I worried about that too when the nausea started to ease)

@bajanbump Wow what a jump!!! That's great news :) I saw my clinic psychologist once but didn't find it useful to be honest, but other people on these threads have found it really useful. Definitely worth giving it a go. Must be fun having twins on both sides of the family! And must be amazing experience living in Barbados. Its a shame you wouldn't feel the care was as good there if you have a multiple pregnancy. Hopefuly if you do need to move you could go back after the birth?

@wantingeasylife I'm so sorry to hear your update. Are you able to go for a scan / blood hcg level or anything to give you some answers? I hope you've been getting plenty of support today irl it must have been such a diffcult day

Hi everyone thanks for your kind messages earlier. I got my result and unfortunately my HCG has dropped to 10 which means it was a chemical pregnancy Not a surprise but I was of course holding a bit of hope. Glad I know the result now though.

So sorry to hear your sad news @HopeSpringsEternal123 @wantingeasylife 💔 please take care of yourselves and lean on your loved ones today.

Wishing you so much more luck on your journey. 💐

@wantingeasylife @HopeSpringsEternal123 very sorry to hear this and hope you can find the support you need at this difficult time and feel better again in time 💐💐 thinking of you xx
@2mumlife yeah if it was just viability Scan then that would be good but I’ve had quite a few now all confirming viability but it doesn’t mean a person will be any less anxious and they should offer more help without you feeling like you can’t ask for it in case they judge your fitness to be a mother/ raise safeguarding concerns. The perinatal team was really good at making me feel at ease and like I’m not being judged but today I received a call from another branch who GP referred to at the same time and the lady said something about protocol is to raise safeguarding which really confused me as I have no risks or displaying any harmful behaviours to myself or the unborn baby, have a supportive family and a house of our own/ good financial background but hearing that safeguarding word really triggered my anxiety again. I then rang the perinatal team and spoke to the same lady as yesterday and she even said she had no concerns like that about me and then checked up the other team’s notes and confirmed to me that she answered no for all the safeguarding qs which was a relief but I shouldn’t be feeling like I can’t even talk openly about how I feel and has effected my trust in the service

Thank you for the lovely messages. I am 100% out now as I have negative pregnancy test. I do have support, my hubby is here for me but the whole thing pretty much sucks. Sorry to read your news @HopeSpringsEternal123, I hope you are ok.

Good luck with your pregnancies journey ladies :)

Thank you @wantingeasylife. And I am so sorry for you too, such a horrible experience. Sending you the best of luck with your journey. xx

@wantingeasylife I'm so sorry - it's horrible. Just make sure to take care of yourself x

@HopeSpringsEternal123 I'm so sorry. It really sucks. Look after yourself x

@Bluehawaii29 I'm sorry you are having all these issues with accessing support - really doesn't help the anxiety.

@Overlyanxious Hopefully will get better soon and they might give me some one to one counselling like I requested. I think once I see the midwife I might feel a bit more supported too x