Bad news at 20 week scan, please help.

[No1worrier]

I hope someone can tell me their experiences from something similar. I have just been told at my 20 week scan my little girl has something seriously wrong with her heart. I have been referred to the fetal medication unit to see a specialist cardiologist tomorrow. She is moving so much, heartbeat has been strong since was 6 and a half weeks pregnant, everything else like her brain, kidneys etc look fine but something is so badly wrong with her heart. I'm so confused 😥. The consultant at the hospital didn't say what he thought it looked like but he said it was serious and I will probably be given options, one being it is fixable, another is ending the pregnancy which we refuse to do! I am 21 weeks pregnant now so more than half way and I can't even think about ending it. All I know is she doesn't have the normal 4 chambers etc like a heart should have. Sorry I don't have much more information than this, we don't get to take notes away home with us at our hospital. Any input would be appreciated 💗

Sorry forgot to mention my down syndrome screening bloods came back as 1 in 99,000

Sincere apologies OP, I didn’t see your latest post. So very sorry to hear your sad news. Wishing you strength at this heartbreaking time

Im so sorry
sending love and prayers 💖

I'm so sorry - I hope you have some support around you. X

www.arc-uk.org/for-parents/break-the-silence-around-tfmr

We lost our first baby 12 years ago in very similar circumstances to yours OP and I second the earlier poster who recommended ARC for help.

I’m so very sorry to read you’re going through this. It is incredibly hard but you will get through it and it will get easier to remember with time.

Speak to specialist midwives and others who’ve gone through this if you can to prepare for the birth and the period afterward. Be kind and gentle with yourself, allow yourself to feel and to grieve.

Oh no OP, I'm so so sorry you have had such devastating news. Mind each other. So sorry xx

OP. So sorry about your news. I have no experience with this at all but am cheered because of the wonderful work done now on e en the tiniest babes. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

So very very sorry.......

Just read your update, I'm so sorry for all the pain you are going through. I'll be thinking of you and your family. x x x

So sorry

I am so sorry to hear this, love to your family and your precious baby girl x

So sorry to hear that and I truly hope you get support for you and your dp xxx

I’m really very sorry, op. I can’t imagine this pain and I wish you well, with strength and love.

Really sorry. Had my fingers crossed for you all day x

So sorry :( , please remember you are never alone on mumsnet , thinking of you x

OP, I am so sorry to read your devastating news. Virtual hug from me

I'm so sorry, thinking of you .

So sorry to hear your news

I’m so very sorry about your baby girl.
Thinking of you at this very difficult time.

So so sorry.

Oh OP, I'm so sorry. My thoughts are with you and your baby girl

I'm so sorry to read this.

I am so sorry to hear your news. As another person said you will always be her mum and she will always be your daughter. Treasure the time you have with her and every last wriggle and kick you get. I lost 3, the eldest being 12 weeks, so nowhere near comparable to your situation, but I found that no man's land of being a mum with no babies hard for a long time. Even though your baby is pre-24 weeks you can opt to take your baby for a private cremation or burial if you want. Local undertakers will organise it for you for free (well they charge the council) and you can still give them the send off you want.

Massive hugs.

Your next steps will take you to the depts of despair and back again.

Please contact ARC. They are amazing

Take care xx

I'm very sorry to hear your news. I wanted to send you and your little girl lots of love. Big hugs x