Jan/Feb 2021 fertility treatment BFP ladies

[cher1981]

Just making a new thread so we can keep chatting :)

Advice needed ladies.
The hospital say they are too busy to fit me in for my 12 week scan and i have to wait for a short notice phone call that will give me less than a days notice for a scan. I am in a meltdown. The idiot on the phone at the admin centre booked me in for 15+6 first then said they are too busy. I called the midwife, she is speaking to the senior team. They told me I am high risk and now this. I am really upset, this is so much stress after going though all this OVF and this pregnancy is so precious.
I have looked up private scans, I am considering booking one just so i definitely get one, this is awful, except for my midwife booking appt all my NHS experiences with this pregnancy have been awful.

@calmcat I booked an early private scan which cost £45 and proved entirely worth the money. The sonographer took her time, was very reassuring and when we told her about our IVF journey - threw in a 3d glimpse and gave us a video of baby moving! Now, I'm not guaranteeing you'll get that but for the sake of making yourself stressed, I'd highly recommend it.

@MF1981 How are you getting on? We declined the 12 week screening blood test and I really hope you're doing okay. Statistics can be fear-inducing but the odds are definitely in your favour . Wishing you all the best.

@calmcat that’s shocking, sorry to hear that, how stressful for you . I’d go for a private scan in your position, I hope it gets sorted and you get an NHS one too.

Hi ladies. Thank you for your comments and sorry for being quiet - it’s been a stressful week. We’re going ahead with the private NIPT next week. I’m hoping as it’s meant to be more accurate that our odds will improve but we’ll see. I’m now busy trying to sort my covid vaccine out - consultant said I can have it, advice is to have the Pfizer only but I can’t find anywhere that will give me the Pfizer!

@MF1981 I remembered that the wife of one of my OHs friends had a higher downs risk at the nuchal scan and they went for NIPT and ended up being reassured so it is worthwhile.

I am also worrying about the vaccine, i have a friend who works in that area and she said the best way to get it sorted is to write to your local MP, i am going to do the same as no way am i turning up and having a different jab until there is data to say its safe.

I got my 12 week NHS scan sorted after the GP and midwife stepped in, funny how they were full but suddenly i had a choice of 2 appointments on Monday coming. The stress was unreal and not needed and i cant help but think if i hadnt been like a dog with a bone i wouldn't have got anywhere, it shouldnt be like this. Also all the local private scanning places who do the nuchal fold and bloods were full?! EVERYONE is pregnant right now.

@cher1981 i had scans at 6 and 8 weeks with my IVF clinic which were great, this is the screening one though. looks like its anywhere between £200 and £500 privately IF you can find a slot, luckily now i dont have to.

Gosh there’s lots of unexpected worries aren’t there? I had my antenatal appointment today and have been put on daily Fragmin injections due to a slightly raised possibility of blood clots. Fantastic. Also, the consultant said I’d have more growth scans between 28-40 weeks due to having an IVF baby. I guess that’s a good thing! Ooft yep I’m also wondering about the vaccine, I have my midwife appointment in 2 week so going to discuss more then. The joys.

@cher1981 I suspect as time progresses more vaccines will be approved as safe for us as more data is gathered but til then I think it will be a fight. But given my NHS experience so far its all been a fight, except the lovely midwives.
I've been to I have to take daily aspirin after my blood thinners stop, to reduce risk of pre eclampsia which apparently I'm at higher risk of due to my age. Im expecting a consultant appt assuming the administration people can book it before ive given birth.....

On another note, im now weaning off progesterone, no more bum jabs or pills, just a pessary. Since reducing, my morning sickness has changed, almost opposite in timing each day. I feel yuk til I eat breakfast, then fine til about 4pm then BAM awful nausea, extra saliva, horrid taste in my mouth which had all subsided by 4pm before, its been a shock to my system, im feeling grim.

I had to laugh earlier, my OH has to have the blood test for anaemia because we have a donor egg so no point testing me, he went pale at the thought, the big wimp, I laughed at him, after all my jabs and bloods I have zero sympathy, cruel of me wa ha haha!

@calmcat sorry you’re feeling grim, hope it lets up soon. I’m starting to have part of the day where I don’t feel nauseous but I still threw up twice this morning (nothing came up the first time and then all my breakfast did the second time )

However I am now feeling like it’s all worth it as finally had our 12 week scan (at 13+1) and saw baby happily chilling, measuring just right and with their heart beating away. We were so nervous beforehand, particularly because I had brown spotting over the weekend which I’ve never had before, so to see that all was well was such a relief. Baby was pretty lazy though, I had to do a lot of jiggling to eventually get them to move enough so that the sonographer could take the NT measurement.

Just trying to decide whether to tell people now or wait a bit longer.

@kikisparks
Congratulations on the scan! Sounds like your sickness is easing off slowly which must be lovely!
We just got back from our scan (11+4). All well and the baby wouldn't stop wiggling about we saw him/her stretch their legs out fully at one point, it was so cute.
I'm a bit overwhelmed as we've been so nervous too.
We are telling our closest friends and im gonna tell work. My OH said something that made me feel calmer, he said that we are now in the same boat as everyone else who is pregnant, natural or IVF. I hadn't thought of it like that.
We have decided to be open about the IVF so people understand our situation a bit more. We arent telling people its a donor egg though because we need to put the baby first and share it with them in the right way at the right time.
Next step is the test results, hopefully all OK, the nuchal measurement was fine which is a good start.

@calmcat congrats to you on a great scan too! Our NT was fine as well, so hoping all will be ok on that front.

@calmcat we’re being pretty open re the IVF too in the hope of raising some awareness and reducing the stigma. I’m 16+1 today and just got back from seeing the midwife. She did my blood test for the NIPT so I can send that off tomorrow and I heard both babies heartbeats too. It was so lovely to hear them!

@MF1981 im sure it will work out fine, im keeping everything crossed for you x
I agree about raising awareness, it can only be good.

Really glad to hear all is going well with everyone and I have my fingers crossed for your test outcome @MF1981

I’m being open about conceiving through IVF and also told people on our ‘social media announcement’ that we’d had a long battle with infertility. It’s definitely about raising awareness and my heart will always be with people struggling to conceive. Having said that I’ve had to step away from a pregnancy app I’ve used due to some of the insensitive comments I’ve seen about infertile people (‘why can’t they just be happy I’m pregnant or pretend to be?!)... not sure if it’s my hormones but it really triggered me 😩🥲

Is anyone else worried about gaining weight- and I mean an unhealthy excess on top of what you are supposed to gain.
The only thing that stops me feeling awful (nausea, general grim feeling, tiredness and yukky taste in my mouth) is to eat regularly, but with my food aversions, my choices aren't so healthy. I'm not eating chocolate or crisps etc but I am on white bread, noodles, potato waffles, that sort of thing, fast and doesn't require proper cooking as I cant face that. Today started well as all days do, with porridge and a glass of fruit juice. Then I had an apple at 10am, so far so good they really help take the weird taste away. But then for lunch at 12.30 I had instant noodles, then a milkshake at 2pm, then at 3.30pm a big soft white roll with ham and Philadelphia cheese. Dinner for the last week has been 2 potato waffles, breaded fish and peas- bland but gives me protein, I will have that tonight at ~7pm.
I always said i wouldn't gain weight but i now realise i had no idea how crap I would feel and how food helps. They weighed me at my scan and i was 79kg!!!!! That's 10kg more than before xmas. I had drunk a litre of water so that's 1kg on its own, but my BMI is now 27, it was 24 before Xmas and I am (well.... was) a size 12, I was quite shocked. The sonographer recorded on the form the picture quality was sub optimal due to low gestational age (only 11+4 which is the earlier end of the window for scanning) and maternal BMI!!!!!! I guess due to my new rapidly developing belly fat.
Do you think that it will calm down in the 2nd trimester? I know that some will be the extra blood etc but not much of it can be the baby and placenta yet.
When I stop feeling dreadful maybe i just need to reign in the eating every 3 hours.
I honestly don't mind gaining the right amount of weight and doing exercise after the birth to sensibly get back in shape but right now I'm a bit down in the dumps about this, I am so bloated, I am still on IVF progesterone and estrogen until 14 weeks, and my belly is wobbly but that's definitely all food not baby.
I am walking regularly and we live on a hill so it gets your heart pumping.

@calmcat I’ve been exactly the same up till now so don’t worry yourself. The midwives always say when you’re suffering in the first trimester or so to just eat what you fancy. I’ve found that in the last few days (end of week 15 and beginning of week 16) I’ve started wanting more fresh food - fruit and veg etc - that I wasn’t wanting before. So I think you just have to listen to your body.

@calmcat I’m scared to weigh myself, I initially seemed to lose weight with the first couple of weeks of sickness but since I have rapidly gotten tubbier so now I can’t do up my jeans! It might be partly a small bump and it’s definitely bloating (the sonographer yesterday showed me all the gas I have on the ultrasound and it was loads ) but I think I’ve also been eating too much crap.

I actually start the day exactly the same as you, porridge and an apple, but then I move on to things like plain crisps, sweet popcorn, sugar ring doughnuts, ginger biscuits, sugary cereal, crackers with margarine etc. I don’t cook now either, I only really make things like a baked potato, some ravioli, breaded vegetable fingers, sweet potato chips- so I eat a rubbish diet, although I do try and eat some fruit and veg like carrot sticks, plain lettuce, grapes, peach slices etc. I’m not overly worried about weight though, I guess because I’m so focused on the nausea I’m giving myself a pass with everything else, although the lack of protein is a bit of a concern but I recently found I didn’t mind soya yoghurt which has a reasonable amount. I was hoping to eat better in the second trimester but I’m here now and still not feeling up to my usual bean chillis, lentil soups, tofu stir fries and chickpea curries. I’ve also agreed to go to an Indian restaurant for a family birthday this weekend and I’ve no idea what I’ll manage to eat, maybe some poppadoms and rice!

Hopefully it will be better for you in the second trimester, I’m still hopeful that I’ll be back to normal, nausea free eating by 16 weeks.

@MF1981 that’s encouraging that things are changing a bit for you! Also fingers crossed for your test outcome.

@cher1981 those comments would make me angry too!

#kikisparks you sound exactly the same as me! Which is really reassuring to hear. The batteries had died in our scales so I wasn't able to weigh myself, I dont think I'm gonna now either.
Sounds like you are having a carb fest just like me, I guess it won't be forever. We were doing the Joe Wicks 90 day plan on and off for a year before falling pregnant so I've not eaten white carbs much for ages and now they make up most of my diet!
For curry you could have a tandoori mixed grill or chicken tikka maybe, get a nice soft naan too, now I want a naan ....

@MF1981 that's good advice, I will listen to my body. I've fancied raspberries quite a bit lately and I think I'm developing an apple addiction since the weekend, so at least that's some healthy stuff, mind you I might go off them again by tomorrow!

Have any of you had a covid vaccine, what advice have you been given and how did it go?

I've got my covid jab (Pfizer) booked for friday when i will be 13+1.

I was nervously optimistic but just saw consultant obstetrician for first appt and shes scared me a bit. She said we have no data (the US have data in 90000 pregnant women though saying its safe). She said i should have it but some women are waiting until 20 weeks for no reason other than it "feels" safer. I have to have it before the 3rd trimester as covid in T3 can cause problems.

I really don't know what to do, i was all up for it and had looked at the risks and weighed it up. If I choose to delay it it means another fight with the GP to get it when i want it and what if they cant give it to me then.

With all the restrictions lifting it feels risky and i feel vulnerable but having gone through all this IVF i am scared to do anything that might risk this baby.

Also found this link elsewhere on mumsnet which is really helpful

www.facebook.com/watch/live/?v=2006145259541323&ref=watch_permalink

Hey @calmcat I had mine a week or so ago after a massive battle with the gp surgery so I could have Pfizer. My consultant recommended I had it due to my underlying conditions but to ensure it was after 13 weeks as most of baby’s major development is complete by that point. All the RCOG, NHS and JCVI advice is to avoid trimester 1 and get it before trimester 3 if you can.

I was 16 weeks when I had mine and I’m having my second dose at 19 weeks.

@MF1981
I will be 13+1, its on the cusp but making me nervous. I have also read that anytime after 13 weeks is ok. I am erring on the side of having it on friday.

@calmcat it’s a very personal decision but in your position I would have it. I’m hoping I get the chance to be vaccinated before the 3rd trimester, my age group aren’t getting vaccinated yet where I am. Do you know why the 3rd trimester should be avoided @MF1981

@kikisparks yes, its more about being protected before third trimester because covid could make you really ill in 3rd trimester and result in early delivery etc so its better to get vaccinated and protected before. But the vaccine won't hurt you in T3 its just more risky to leave it late getting it.
I'm 42 so im lucky to be able to get vaccinated but also feel a bit like a guinea pig despite all the real world data from vaccinating pregnant women in the US.

@calmcat ah ok thanks. So if I can’t get it in my 2nd trimester I’m still better to get it in my 3rd than not to get it.