Smoking (weed) | Mumsnet

Mumtobexo · 2020-07-03T20:19:02+00:00

I broke up with my baby's father. This is my first child. I feel completely lost and alone. I have just smoked weed due to stress and feel incredibly guilty. I just don't know what to do.

lockdownpregnancy · 03/07/2020 21:24

You're only going to do yourself and your baby harm if you carry on smoking.
I'm sorry you're going through a hard time but you need to look at other outlets to ease your stress.
Talking to someone, meditation, yoga etc.
It's not just about you now, you have a baby to think about.
I do hope you'll be ok x

nextnamex · 03/07/2020 21:36

I'm not going to sugar coat this - imagine how you'll feel if something happens to your pregnancy? even if it wasnt directly because of the smoking you would always wonder.

breaking up is hard and shitty but you have someone else who is more important now, concentrate on that, everything else comes second. reach out for support from friends/family/midwife

MiniTheMinx · 03/07/2020 21:42

Are you going to smoke it again? no.....well, if it was a one off it will probably be ok. Carry on smoking weed and you'll almost definitely blame yourself if any harm happens.

Was baby planned? how did you feel about it when you found out you were pregnant?

AnnaSW1 · 03/07/2020 21:58

Don't do it again.

bestbrowsintown · 03/07/2020 22:03

I just don't know what to do.

Throw the rest in the bin and don't do it again.

Turning to drugs when you're feeling stressed suggests you may have had issues with drug use in the past? You could ask your midwife for support.

Do you have family or a close friend you can turn to for support.

A one off will likely do no harm at all but it's a slippery slope to sustained use which will harm your baby.

Gerdticker · 03/07/2020 23:03

Hey - well done for writing this here

I can tell you know it’s a seriously bad idea to smoke weed when pregnant, so I don’t think you need another lecture

The fact that you put this question here shows you’re acknowledging the mistake and looking for help, and that’s a really really good sign

You are strong - any guy who splits up with you at this tough time is not good enough for you and your baby. You’re stronger forging your own path, with honesty and love

Take a breath, and try to smile for a moment. You can do this. You’re going to be the most amazing Mum, I can tell

Hugs xx

Original poster

Mumtobexo · 04/07/2020 03:38

@Gerdticker

Hey - well done for writing this here

I can tell you know it’s a seriously bad idea to smoke weed when pregnant, so I don’t think you need another lecture

The fact that you put this question here shows you’re acknowledging the mistake and looking for help, and that’s a really really good sign

You are strong - any guy who splits up with you at this tough time is not good enough for you and your baby. You’re stronger forging your own path, with honesty and love

Take a breath, and try to smile for a moment. You can do this. You’re going to be the most amazing Mum, I can tell

Hugs xx

Your message was definitely the least non judgmental. I appreciate you not judging me ❤️

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The4ks · 04/07/2020 04:02

No judgement at all here, things are tough.
Well done for acknowledging things have to change.
I smoked (normal cigarettes) when pregnant, not proud of it though.
The guilt should hopefully get you, nothing is more important than your baby.

nextnamex · 04/07/2020 06:59

I didnt judge you at all but you've asked a question about drug use during pregnancy and what to do. I gave you worst case scenario - something happening to your pregnancy because I wouldn't want you doing it again and this being the awful outcome. the reason I mentioned it is in the hope it would be enough to make you think twice if you were tempted again. I also was trying to give you another thing to focus on that is more important than anything else which is your growing baby.

you have actually not had that bad responses at all considering the bashing some get on here for smoking and drinking whilst pregnant. I think you need help which is what the rest of us have all said (most of us said reaching out for support). I'm confused what answers you wanted?

anyhow, i can be sympathetic of your circumstances but not agree with how your handling it and suggest you reach out. like I said, considering your on a site where there are people struggling to conceive you've had very pleasant responses actually. not having a go at you but it comes across quite petulant and immature when you write something claiming the rest of us were judging you when most of us actually didnt

LH1987 · 04/07/2020 07:39

As a once off it is unlikely to do any harm at all. So many women don't know they are pregnant and continue to do drink alcohol, smoked and take recreational drugs. Obviously, don't do it again but it is not going to help your stress to worry about this slip up. As pp said throw out any drugs you still have to avoid doing it again.

It sounds like you are better off without the babys father. The fact that you posted this here shows how much you care about your unborn baby. Keep strong and try to focus on positives xx

lockdownpregnancy · 04/07/2020 08:13

I didn't judge you either OP. Totally shit time for you that's for sure! You're already doing the right thing by talking on this forum!

As other pp's have said, if it was a one off then I wouldn't worry too much but if it's something that you do on a regular basis then you do need to stop immediately and seek help to help you quit ❤️

bestbrowsintown · 04/07/2020 08:13

Your message was definitely the least non judgmental. I appreciate you not judging me ❤️

Op I actually think the replies here have all been pretty supportive. You obviously know yourself that smoking weed when you're pregnant isn't good or you wouldn't have posted here.

bestbrowsintown · 04/07/2020 08:14

Honestly I've seen women on here slated and told they are selfish etc for having one small glass of champagne when pregnant. So people have been pretty gentle (rightly) here.

Original poster

Mumtobexo · 04/07/2020 08:56

Personally never saw weed as a drug. BUT that's just me though. I never smoke it if I'm honest. Weirdly medicalised in some places yet others make out it's like crack cocaine or something. People are judgmental regardless not much can be done about that.. and others I guess act as if they're the perfect type of parents. People handle situations different and I came for advice it's not like I've been constantly smoking it. I recognised what I did so reached out for help not asking for sympathy at all.

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Celibacydidntwork · 04/07/2020 09:06

A one off prob won’t do any harm op. As @lockdownpregnancy says lots of women carry on for weeks without knowing they are pregnant.

You asked for thoughts on what do and I’d say, don’t ponder on it and feel guilty, the safe thing for your baby would be to not smoke anymore and I’m sure you know that. Xx

nextnamex · 04/07/2020 09:49

OP you're trolling surely, noone has even given you a hard time, they've said not to dwell on if it was once, not to do it again and if you are tempted and need help then to reach out for support. you're going through a shit time but I almost feel like you've come on here to start a debate about weed as opposed to asking for genuine advice which we have all given you

AnneLovesGilbert · 04/07/2020 11:45

Weed is a drug. As is alcohol - not meant to drink any when you’re pregnant. And caffeine - there’s a safe limit you should stick to when pregnant. I’m sure you know that. Your baby is entirely dependent on you to protect, nurture and grow it. It can’t stick up for itself. Pregnancy involves a level of self sacrifice if you want the best for your baby. Being a parent does too. Good opportunity now to moderate your own desires for the sake of the baby you’ve chosen to bring into the world, get used to it.

Original poster

Mumtobexo · 04/07/2020 18:48

@nextnamex

OP you're trolling surely, noone has even given you a hard time, they've said not to dwell on if it was once, not to do it again and if you are tempted and need help then to reach out for support. you're going through a shit time but I almost feel like you've come on here to start a debate about weed as opposed to asking for genuine advice which we have all given you

Really? You have no idea what I've been through. I don't have time to troll when I've clearly asked for advice. If that's what you think then don't comment on the damn thread. Everyone takes things in different ways. Girl bye

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lockdownpregnancy · 04/07/2020 19:16

@Mumtobexo when you say your don't know what to do' what do you mean? Do you mean you don't know what to do about the weed smoking or you don't know what to do in life and with the baby?
Either way, you need to establish a good support network if you can. Reach out to close friends and family and explain how you're feeling about everything that is happening with you.
If you don't want to speak to those closest to you, then have a chat with your MW. 99.9% of them are so lovely and supportive and may be able to help you and give you the support you want/need.
Talking is probably one of the best things for you to do. Sometimes just talking gives you the clarity that you are seeking

BadAlice · 04/07/2020 20:03

The research is clear that the risks with cannabis are the same as the risks of smoking during pregnancy so whilst it’s ‘bad’ it isn’t in the same league as other recreational drugs. Regular users risk smaller babies due to decreased blood flow across the placenta, and an increased risk of SIDS. As a one off, it is unlikely to do any harm. The main concern from a midwifery perspective would be what kind of lifestyle you may be living and who you are interacting with to acquire cannabis rather than necessarily the effects of the drug itself.

Do you have a good support network op? What are the stresses that make you turn to weed as a coping mechanism? Is this something you have done regularly throughout your life?

bestbrowsintown · 04/07/2020 21:48

Op I'm really not sure what you wanted from your thread.
People gave you advice.

CWF123 · 04/07/2020 22:00

Hi firstly I hope your okay, it's really sad that your partner has left you at what should be a very special time for you both. Well if you need a chat I'm here :)
Secondly good for you in reaching out for advise! Don't be too hard on yourself you did want you needed to do to cope and people have done far worse! You clearly don't want to go down this avenue again hence reaching out but maybe speak with your midwife or doctors and they may be able to offer some for of CBD oil or a product that's safe in pregnancy.

CWF123 · 04/07/2020 22:01

@Mumtobexo sorry for some reason my post wouldn't tag you

Original poster

Mumtobexo · 04/07/2020 22:25

@bestbrowsintown

Op I'm really not sure what you wanted from your thread. People gave you advice.

How about for people not to come across as harsh and rude when reaching out for some advice. There's ways of talking too people but I guess people like to make people feel some type of way for the sake of it

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Original poster

Mumtobexo · 04/07/2020 22:26

@bestbrowsintown

Op I'm really not sure what you wanted from your thread. People gave you advice.

How about for people not to come across as harsh and rude when reaching out for some advice. There's ways of talking too people but I guess people like to make people feel some type of way for the sake of it

OP posts: