My feed

to access all these features

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.


Anyone had termination for medical reasons

88 replies

Lockdownbabies · 13/06/2020 12:37

Hi explained in subject really just wondered if anyone who’s had a termination for medical reasons ( surgically) could explain their process to me Sad ie door it hurt after? What happens etc

OP posts:
Lockdownbabies · 13/06/2020 22:42

@Isthisfinallyit wow really! The idea of nurse taking pictures in case I change my mind is a good idea!
Tbh I’m hoping I can have surgical as thought of birthing terrifies me! But I feel like I do want something to remember it by! (Not that is ever forget) but you know what I mean

OP posts:
Lockdownbabies · 13/06/2020 22:42

And I will get help if I need it I’m glad therapy helped you overcome your pain

OP posts:
Lockdownbabies · 13/06/2020 22:45

@Seasiderabbit I’m glad the memorial was positive for you Smile and thank you again!
At the moment I strongly feel like I’d want a physical if that’s the right word reminder of baby but may not be able to and also I
May change my mind I guess who knows

OP posts:
Isthisfinallyit · 13/06/2020 22:57

I'm not sure what reminders they can give you if you have a surgical. That might not be possible because it doesn't come out as whole as with birthing.

Isthisfinallyit · 13/06/2020 22:59

It's a weird place to be in now. I remember it all feeling so surreal at times, and so raw and real at others. I hope that in time you can make peace with whats happening to you. Thanks

Lockdownbabies · 13/06/2020 23:00

@Isthisfinallyit ohhh I didn’t realise it wouldn’t come out while I guess Sad

OP posts:
Lockdownbabies · 13/06/2020 23:01

Thank you so so I Sad and I’m glad you did

OP posts:
Isthisfinallyit · 13/06/2020 23:07

The procedure might be different in my country than yours though. Just ask them if you need to know something. Don't ask if you don't want to know.

Isthisfinallyit · 13/06/2020 23:07

So don't take my word as gospel

ArthurMorgan · 13/06/2020 23:10

@Lockdownbabies , I'm sorry I forgot to mention about the pain part.. from what I can remember (it was 3.5 years ago now) I didn't have any pain and the bleeding was minimal too. x

Isthisfinallyit · 13/06/2020 23:15

Oh yeah, afterwards. There wasn't that much bleeding afterwards for me. I didn't need the maternity pads or any paracetamol. I just used normal night time pads. You're not allowed tampons due to infection risk. I felt quite good. Thought I would feel worse. Wasn't a problem. Nothing to be scared of.

Treaclepie19 · 13/06/2020 23:15

I was told the same about not coming out whole from the surgical option.
Another thing to think about is the memorial. As it was we had our own private funeral planned for us by the hospital which I'm so very grateful for.

passthemustard · 13/06/2020 23:19

Similar to @isthisfinallyit almost exactly the same actually but 17 weeks.

When trying to pass the placenta I lost a lot of blood before they decided they needed to take me to surgery. I was literally just bleeding and bleeding and in and out of consciousness and my friend who was supporting me had to beg the doctors to intervene.

I needed a few units of blood and was quite poorly for a while.

Sorry that's actually not helpful or supportive but I wanted you to know so that if you don't have the full surgery option and you start bleeding they should not let you bleed for too long.

ArthurMorgan · 13/06/2020 23:19

If you do find that you struggle at all, please don't suffer in silence and ask for counselling through the iapt service. I waited far too long and suffered far too much before I talked to someone but I had a specialist counsellor and she literally changed my life for the better.

Lockdownbabies · 13/06/2020 23:35

Thanks all I will be sure to seek help and no @passthemustard all information for me at the minute is helpful so thank you Flowers

OP posts:
Lockdownbabies · 14/06/2020 12:32

Nice glass of white whine or 2 would be really nice right now to calm my nerves shame I can’t have one eh 🤦🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
Treaclepie19 · 14/06/2020 13:02

Do it if you feel like it ❤
Hope you've got lots of support around you.

Clemmie83 · 14/06/2020 13:06

I agree, go for it and have a glass of wine if it'll make you feel kind to yourself.

Treaclepie19 · 24/06/2020 10:25

I've been thinking of you @Lockdownbabies. Hope you're doing as well as expected.

Lockdownbabies · 24/06/2020 10:47

Thank you @Treaclepie19 I had the op 4 days ago now, was feeling very tired and very sore up untill now still little sore didn’t have much bleeding at all though! Physicaly getting there mentally meh, had a dream last night that I was happily pregnant and announced the news to everyone woke up in hot sweats crying
People say I’m bottling it up but I just can’t talk abut it, typing like this is ok talking just can’t seem to do
Thank you for asking means a lot Flowers

OP posts:
Treaclepie19 · 24/06/2020 10:58

@Lockdownbabies I felt similar. Talking to people in real life just felt too personal and pointless. Like they didn't understand anyway so why would I open up to them.

I'm glad physically things are improving. Mentally there will be a lot to deal with.
Im on a group on here for people who have had a TFMR and are pregnant or ttc but you'd be very welcome even if you just wanted a chat.
Look after yourself Flowers

Lockdownbabies · 24/06/2020 11:08

Thank you @Treaclepie19 means a lot really it does Smile

OP posts:
UpsyDaisy1234 · 04/07/2020 12:26

@Isthisfinallyit Please am having one done in a couple of days. Can i dm for some questions please?

Isthisfinallyit · 04/07/2020 19:28


Sure! I’m on the app and have never had a dm before so if I don’t respond in a day please tag me on here and we’ll figure something out.

Lockdownbabies · 04/07/2020 23:26

@UpsyDaisy1234 you having surgical or?

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.