Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

How many godparents?

44 replies

LouisaPipSqueak · 16/04/2020 11:39

I want 9 people as godparents, 4 couples and my brother.
However people are telling me this is far too many? Which yes, I understand but how an earth do I choose between them?
Would it be fair/right to just have my girl friends as god mothers and not include their husbands plus my brother as the only god father?
I honestly couldn’t choose which couple I would prefer... Confused

OP posts:
shirleyschmidt · 16/04/2020 15:17

I think in theory you can have as many as you want BUT there's probably a limit to what appears on the certificate (2 on ours).

I'd try to narrow it down, 9 seems too many. Ours have 4 each. Your brother seems an obvious one. I'd just pick one or two of the other couples based on which you're closest to, or who you think would be most pleased to be asked.

Also - will you have any other children? You don't want to use up all your favourite people and have nobody to ask next time! Save two of the couples for that Smile

shirleyschmidt · 16/04/2020 15:17

And yes I'd also only have Christians

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 16/04/2020 15:20

DH has more god/guide children than I do (guide parent being the secular/humanist alternative). It makes perfect sense to me as the extra ones are his friends, and the joint ones are joint friends. (The kids still call me 'Auntie' though regardless of official title. And I'm the one who sorts Christmas/Birthday presents)

Pixilicious · 16/04/2020 15:23

9 is ridiculous! Normally 3, 2 of the same sexy as the baby and 1 of the opposite alex.

Pixilicious · 16/04/2020 15:23

sex

mollibu · 16/04/2020 15:23

9 is SO unnecessary! 3 Maximum each in this family per child.

If you go on to have another child, you'd have nobody to askGrin

Original poster
LouisaPipSqueak · 16/04/2020 15:25

Thanks all, very valid comments and I appreciate what you are saying.

3 are very very close friends of mine, have know most my life (then their husbands) and the 4th is my cousin, again someone I am very close too.
I could possibly pick 2 out of 3 from the friends but think you are all right. I’m/my child will have a closer relationship to the girls rather than their husbands.

I totally agree with those saying my brother is an uncle so already has a role but my mum and husband both agree regardless/as well as being an uncle he already has a huge part in the baby’s life so would be lovely to like make him one too.

After thinking about it for a while it’s sounds like the 3 girls and my brother is the best choice... I should also check with the church as I’m now worried incase I am only allowed two people!

Thanks all.

OP posts:
Original poster
LouisaPipSqueak · 16/04/2020 15:28

I would also love a second child and understand when saying, keep some people for second one however 1. It may not happen for us 2. I feel second choices are second best and 3. I think I’d like my children to have the same godparents.

OP posts:
NoMorePoliticsPlease · 16/04/2020 15:32

The duty of a godparent is to back up the parents in your childs religious life and ensure the faith is maintained. Is that what you are planning? They have noo other function. If you are religious I am sure you know this, if not am not sure what your aim is

n00bMaster69 · 16/04/2020 15:44

Are you Christian? You don't sound like you are.

Why not have a naming ceremony with guide parents?

ThanksItHasPockets · 16/04/2020 17:25

Are your choices baptised, OP? They can’t be godparents if not (in CofE), although they can be ‘supporters’. Catholic churches are stricter again and expect godparents to be baptised, confirmed, and practising.

MonaLisaDoesntSmile · 16/04/2020 17:40

Our church allows 2 officially on the paperwork, but you can have more. 9 is LOADS though. Pick them out of the hat, or ask one of your friends and your brother.

sel2223 · 16/04/2020 17:52

I bet you don't even want all 9 OP, you're just worried about upsetting people?
I was the same when I got married. I had 7 bridesmaids: 3 of whom I didn't really want but felt I had to have. 5 years later, I don't even see those 3 anymore!

9 is excessive as I'm sure you know yourself. I remember going to a christening at a big church near us where there were several 3 christenings going on at the same time. All the godparents were asked to stand up and one family had 10 while the rest had 2-4 each. It looked ridiculous and felt very 'big fat gypsy wedding' if you know what I mean.

Be strong, don't bow to the same pressure I did and stop worrying about offending people.

Ragwort · 17/04/2020 04:57

Why would you want your DC to have the same Godparents? That seems rather unusual? The Godparent/child relationship can be very special & it is nice for the child to have an ‘extra’ adult in their life ..
But a little odd if it is the same one as their sibling.

BuffaloCauliflower · 17/04/2020 07:34

Are you actually Christian?

Parker231 · 17/04/2020 07:40

What faith are you? Are the proposed godparents of the same?

Tiredmum100 · 17/04/2020 07:47

I'm god mother to a brother and sister. I didn't think it was odd. I do think 9mis too many. My dh and myself are god parents to my friends son, he has two sets of couples so 4 in total.

WindowGazer2 · 17/04/2020 07:49

Wow! Normal in Scotland to only have 1 Godmother. Why do you need so many? Agree with choosing a Christian. Having been to christening services and listening to the oath you make, I couldn't stand up and make those vows as someone who is not a Christian.

SageRosemary · 18/04/2020 01:22

Ummm, what about the baby's father, does he get to choose a godparent from his side of the family?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page