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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

3 binge occasions early pregnancy

112 replies

Mrsdt15655 · 13/04/2020 14:24

I know this topic has been posted on before but I'm going out of my mind with worry. I have anxiety anyway but it's getting much much worse in the last week. I found out I was pregnant but before that I had three occasions when I drank a huge amount of wine (no other drinking besides that). My distress is such that I have booked a termination for tomorrow. This was a wanted child and I am so distraught that I have messed this up so badly. I drank heavily at 3+4 weeks, 4+4 and 4+5 weeks. I am desperate to hear from anyone who has done this. The other complication is that I have a fatty liver and therefore my body doesn't metabolise alcohol very well - a reason I haven't been drinking but I assumed I couldn't get pregnant as have been trying for a year.

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HarrietM87 · 23/04/2020 18:23

Ah yes sorry @wineymummy - missed your earlier post - glad to see we are in agreement!

@Mrsdt15655 Expecting Better is really worth a read - you’ll be hearing it from someone who has analysed all the available evidence rather than strangers off the internet!

user1472721797 · 23/04/2020 18:41

@Mrsdt15655 I know you’ve probably had enough of health professionals but it may be worth talking to your gp. I had constant worries like this throughout my pregnancy, not just about alcohol but everything, what I ate, the paint I used to paint the nursery etc. I was convinced I’d harmed my baby in some way. No matter how much reassurance I got, it never eased my anxiety. After my son was born I then became worried I’d physically harm him. I went to my go and was diagnosed with pure OCD and put on anti-depressants which helped immensely and continued to take them during my second pregnancy despite there being a small risk of defect. Both of my children are absolutely fine.

c0ffeeandcake · 26/04/2020 20:19

How are you OP? Xx

Marphise · 26/04/2020 21:25

Hey OP, sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. I totally get you because I've been worrying about the silliest things. As an exemple, I worried because I sat in the bath with my son for 30min before I remembered that hot baths are not advised in pregnancy (even though there isn't much data to confirm this and people in finland who regularly have saunas don't have more birth defects than other countries !)

About the drinking, pp's have done a great job at explaining why you most likely didn't do any harm. I'm actually a bit angry on your behalf. So many of these health in pregnancy campaigns try to rule through fear rather than educate women about actual risks.

I don't know if that helps but I read about a study that found that amongst women who drank a sustained high amount throughout pregnancy, most had healthy children (I seem to recall that only a third of the babies had issues, and the mothers had been drinking at least a bottle a day for the whole nine months !

In other words, even the most hardened drinkers are more likely to have a healthy baby than not. And you're not a "hardened drinker", you had three bouts of drinking in very early pregnancy.

Like pp's said, it tends to be an all or nothing deal so early in pregnancy. If you'd done any actual damage you'd have miscarried before now.

I really hope you're ok. I'm angry at the doctors covering their backs rather than giving you the reassurance you need. Maybe you should reach out to other sources of mental health support to help you gain perspective and worry less ?

Mrsdt15655 · 26/04/2020 21:58

Thanks so much for your messages. I’ve been having good days and bad days. I have mainly given up on the medical professionals as they seem to take such a hard line with pregnant women. In particular that midwife from UCLH: I was upset for days after that. I’m finding my best support is from other mums. I have two good friends who recently had babies and opening up to them has really helped. Plus mumsnet of course. I slept through the night last night for the first time in weeks. I hope this continues and I can stay hopeful. At least I’ve stopped thinking about a termination. Thanks again - this support means so much xx

OP posts:
Liverbird77 · 27/04/2020 10:16

Good to hear! Keep talking because there are a lot of people on here to give support/ an ear x

YouBringLightInToADarkPlace · 07/05/2020 16:44

How are you getting on now OP? Been thinking about you...

Mrsdt15655 · 29/05/2020 08:38

@YouBringLightInToADarkPlace, thanks for your message. I was doing OK but found out yesterday that I have a 1 in 6 chance of having a baby with Down's. The scan looked fine but my bloods were way off. I'm so deeply upset. Just when I started to manage my anxiety this happened. I'm waiting for the results of the harmony test. I can only hope and pray that it's a good result.

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TeddyBeans · 05/06/2020 14:30

Hey OP how are you doing? Did you get your harmony results back yet? Hope it's good news for you

Mrsdt15655 · 06/06/2020 13:29

I got my results back and the baby has DS - confirmed by a CVS test. It's such a shock but I'm processing it and trying to be positive. I can't believe I was so anxious in the beginning about something that probably didn't matter. Now that this has happened, it puts everything in perspective.

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BadAlice · 06/06/2020 14:00

@Mrsdt15655 What a shock for you. It sounds like you know but please do remember that this has nothing to do with anything you did early on and is just ‘one of those things’. How many weeks are you? Do you have good support to make the right choices for you and your family?

TeaAndASitDown · 12/06/2020 14:36

@Mrsdt15655 oh you have been through a lot. Thank you for updating us and I'm so pleased you managed to keep going despite all your anxiety in the early days. I hope everything works out ok for you and your little one now.

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