Friend has guessed I’m pregnant

[tacosplease]

A close friend has guessed that I’m pregnant and has texted asking if I am.

I’m only seven weeks and wasn’t planning on telling anyone yet. I have an eight week scan booked next week but even then I was hoping to wait until the 12 week mark to be absolutely safe.

However, I feel terrible actively lying to my friend by flat out denying it! Should I just ignore her text for five long weeks?

What would you do?

Text back ‘you saying I’m fat? 😂’

That’s horrible of your friend! She shouldn’t have done that. Why is it her business. If you don’t see her often I’d ignore.

She wouldn't be my friend any more.. how rude.

If it's a close friend I'll tell. But then I told everyone as soon as a faint line appeared on my pregnancy test! I know it's not the done thing but just could not stop myself.

‘You know, it’s rude to ask people that 🙃’
She is being rude but equally, she might just be excited. Plus people love to be the first to know, and even more to be the first to ‘call it’.

Nosy cow....she has no boundaries.

If she’s that gossipy and nosey she will end up telling other people before you do. You don’t owe her any explanation.

My view about telling people was that if a miscarriage happened I wanted to be able to express my grief without having to hide it.

Were you out with her last night and on the soft drinks?

If she's a close friend I would tell her and swear her to secrecy.

I'm not sure what the big deal is with keeping pregnancies secret from close friends and family. If anything was wrong surely you'd rely on those people for emotional support? If it's a planned pregnancy then I assume she knew you were trying?

One of my friends guessed (normally a BIG drinker!) and asked me (face to face not even on a text) and I just said yes but asked her not to share it with anyone.

It does depend how close to be honest. If very close, I’d just be honest, and say yes but it’s a secret. I knew about my closest friends pregnancy from about two minutes after she POAS but she didn’t tell anyone else until after the scan. Only you know if your friend can keep a secret but I’d feel like you, I wouldn’t want to lie.

Congratulations op, why is it rude of your friend though? Can you not just say that it’s not public knowledge yet?

I suppose I could tell her after the eight week scan, assuming all is well. But I was hoping to tell family before friends and I’m not seeing my mum until October (I really want to tell her face to face rather than over the phone!)

Cittadina you’re missing the point.

I'm 5 weeks pregnant and have told a few close friends and family. I'll need their support if i miscarry and also if I don't

It's a shame that it's ruined how you wanted things to happen; but realistically she knows now. Do you know how she knows? Were you out on the soft drinks last night, or are you subconsciously guarding your stomach a lot when you're out? It might be worth trying to work out how she's guessed, so you can work out how many other people might know too!

If it was me, I'd either reply but not answer the question (the are you saying I'm fat response enough could work) or tell her that we weren't telling people yet and ask her to keep it to herself.

When in October are you seeing your mum? Could you go see her before then, or do you definitely only want to tell her after the 12 week scan? Either is fine, it's absolutely up to you; but she might not be the first to know if people are already guessing now. You've got five weeks to get through first!

I am sort of dreading this happening, I think I'll be awful at keeping the secret.

One of my friends guessed immediately that I was pregnant with DD1. We arrived to stay after a long drive and she offered me a G&T. I declined and asked for a soft drink. She immediately laughed and asked when I was due! I was only weeks but i didn't try to hide it. It was nice to be able to talk about it.

I suppose I’d just worry that if I told her, it could get back to my parents somehow before I’d had the chance to tell them. I’m also terrified that something could go wrong as it’s such early days...

I'm not sure what the big deal is with keeping pregnancies secret from close friends and family. If anything was wrong surely you'd rely on those people for emotional support? If it's a planned pregnancy then I assume she knew you were trying?

It doesn't matter if you understand it or not. Plenty of people prefer to keep it between them and the father until post 12 weeks whatever happens and don't feel the need to announce that they're having unprotected sex.

She guessed because I wasn’t drinking when out. I’m never, ever without a glass of wine in hand when down the pub!

If something does go wrong, is she a friend who you would confide in?

You are a lovely friend but I'd prefer not to answer that'd question at moment

She’s rude to ask. Has she got kids? If so, she should know better.

Besides it’s got nothing to do with her.

I’d say in this instance it’s ok to lie. Tell her you’re having a detox or something.

If she tells anyone else you’ll be stressing about your Mum finding out.

Congratulations!

I'd respond 'I'm detoxing, and if I was, I'd be telling my family first! '