Graduates of the TTC After Pregnancy Loss thread. Aka: The Penguin Huddle

[MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue]

This is a safe and supportive thread for ladies from the TTC after pregnancy loss thread who've had a BFP and are now negotiating the scary rollercoaster world of pregnancy after loss.

If you weren't on the original thread, have suffered a loss and are now pregnant please feel free to join the penguin huddle 🐧

Positive pants ON. Let’s get our rainbows ladies 🌈

Thanks everyone, we went for the scan this morning and the baby is fine and measuring 8 weeks with a visible heartbeat 😊 We were really shocked and pretty emotional tbh, I really thought that was it. They told me to relax, and pushed my next scan back a week, so 2 weeks time, which is understandable but annoying as I really wanted a scan at 8.5/9 weeks, since our babies have stopped developing at 8 weeks in the past. I don't feel totally reassured that the bleeding isn't a sign of something bad to come, but she did say she can't see any bleeding around the baby.

I really pressed for progesterone, and she said she'd ask the doctor and let me know, but they don't generally give it out on the nhs because the evidence for it isn't great. She said most people go private for it.

@Dimblebimble I’m so relieved for you. If no bleeding around the baby it could have been a cervical bleed. There’s loads of blood vessels in that area and one might have popped. I had it with my first pregnancy.

With regards to progesterone my GP had no problem prescribing it on the NHS purely because I’d had a mmc. She didn’t test my progesterone because apparently low progesterone can be hard to diagnose as it fluctuates. It’s a really cheap medication with no risks so pretty bad they won’t give you it just in case. Apparently if there are any autoimmune issues it makes it less likely your body will reject the baby. I hope they prescribe it for you! Xx

@TickTockBaby welcome and congratulations on your pregnancy.

@Dimblebimble yay that's great news, hoping the next 2 weeks go quickly for you.

@Bluebelltulip thank you.

@Dimblebimble that is good news! Hopefully the bleeding stops and it's one of those unexplained bleeds some women get in healthy pregnancies.

@Dimblebimble I am so pleased for you. I hope the next two weeks pass quickly for you, and with no more bleeding.

Hello and welcome @TickTockBaby. Congraulations on your pregnancy. I'm sure you DH will be okay when you tell him. Take time to find the right words and you'll be fine.

I have my 12 week scan tomorrow morning (at 13+4). Bricking it doesn' come close!

Argh so much to catch up on and I am pretty sure I will miss people so apologies in advance!

Welcome back @InDreamland! Glad you had a nice time and good luck today for the heartbeat. What hospital are you with? Just to flag if its Whipps I really had to push to get mine to find it at the 16-18 week app. She did in the end because she saw how anxious I was.

@Mistymeow I started wearing m badge at about 10 weeks as I felt sick. I still wear it at almost 25 because I find people don’t look at your bump if its crowded and I like the clarity! Although to be fair, I just ask if I want a seat these days. I read that if you ask “is anyone able to stand?” it’s a politer way of getting people up without putting someone on the spot who may need the seat, so I feel less annoying if I do this!

@Dimblebimble what a rollercoaster and what a relief! Can you book a private scan if you want to be seen earlier given that it’s your anxious time? You may just be one of those women who bleed – I bled all the way through DD pregnancy and there never was an explanation

Great news on the scans @UnicornsandRainbows1 and @@fnej01!

Welcome @Twitwooo and @ TickTockBaby!

@sadtoday21 I think you mentioned that a reassurance scan is more than gender? As the Scan Queen, I know that is because they check more – measure organs etc, whereas in a gender scan they are primarily looking for one thing. Obviously if there was something glaringly obviosu I am sure they would pick up on it but I have always paid the extra for reasurance scans because I’d rather have them check thoroughly and then if they can tell the sex they will tell you as well. I think they can sometimes tell from 14 but I would be wary and go would 16 as a better age to tell for sure.

Your poor lovely daughter @Bluebelltulip. As always you sound like you are doing a fantastic job of reassuring her. I hope the appointment on Monday goes well.

Sorry to hear about your dog @Squiff70 but glad the counselling has started. I found counselling really useful after my MC and ectopic pregnancies, and have continued throughout this pregnancy. Good luck for the scan tomororw!

Sorry to read about your nausea and teaching experiences @Catconfusion and @janey15. My mum was a teacher for years (retired now) and so is my sister. I listen to their stories and know I could never do it!

How are you doing @Laney79? Sure we are like a day apart so always like to hear your updates!

Has anyone heard from @Moonpeace?

Finally, I agree with everyone who said their pregnancies are dragging but other people’s are flying! I am 25 weeks on Saturday and feel like since 20 weeks it has gone so slowly. I am desperate for it to hurry up but also feel like since this will be my last pregnancy (provided all continues to go well) I should savour it more. Hard when the anxiety is still there. I do feel Baby Boy every day and he is super active, which I love. I am also very conscious about how much needs to be sorted in my house and organised, so part of me is grateful for the time!

I'm so pleased that all was ok @Dimblebimble - I really hope that they prescribe the progesterone for you. They really don't have much of an argument after that tommys research. Mine was prescribed on the NHS no problem. They gave me a huge bag full (enough to see me through to16 weeks!). Well done for pushing for it too-it's not easy.

Sorry not to have been very active-I've been keeping an eye on the thread but been so busy with appointments, work, holiday, parental injuries, dog physio-crazy!

So pleased to see lots of positive updates - it makes me smile every time.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue -thanks for asking! well I'm 24+2 today...I do have a bump but as I'm a tall lass it's not that noticeable! I'm a 12/14 usually so I do have some pre baby blubber which is hiding things (my bump is more B shaped than a smooth bump!). But there's deffo a bubba in there, I'm getting lots of kicks and they are visible through my tummy. Also getting an odd vibrating feeling sometimes which dr google suggests is when the baby is pressing on a nerve!

Been busy kitting out the nursery, so things are starting to feel real now! Crazy to think I'm over halfway!

Only probs I've had have been leg cramps and constipation (ugh!). Then this past week a very odd leg problem! Was on hols in Norfolk, doing more walking than recently (my mom has ripped the tendons in her foot/ankle so I was walking their dog) and felt something like mild cramp in my calf...fast forward three days and my leg was incredibly painful and had loads of bruising. As I'm old (40), and family history of dvt my fella made me go to maternity triage. They wanted to scan to rule out a clot but dept not open at a weekend! So had to have daily heparin injections just in case until the scan! Had that Monday-no clot so they thing I've just got a severe calf strain/muscle damage. Bloody agony when I initially get up, had me in tears! So currently on the sofa resting and elevating!

Got a consultant appt this arvo-hoping I may get a date for my section. Starting to get anxious about it and I'd feel better if the date was agreed.

Sorry not to reply/mention everyone, I'm so far behind I'd be here all day! Sending you all hugs, and lots of good wishes for appointments/scans etc.

Pics of my leg-I'm soooo pretty!!!

Hi, how is everyone. @Laney79 that looks painful. I've been getting headaches on and off anyone else? I'm worried that it's my blood pressure. It actually woke me up at half 3 last night then I couldn't sleep for ages.

@TickTockBaby congratulations and welcome x

@Dimblebimble fantastic news from your scan! Could you try your dr for the pessaries?

@Squiff70 good luck tomorrow! I've got mine in just under 3 weeks and it feels like such a long wait!

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue I feel like the days are passing quite quickly for me - I can't believe I'm now 9+6 - but the weeks seem slow and it takes ages to get to the next milestone!

@Laney79 That looks so painful! I'm guessing the heparin injections have made the bruising even worse. A few years ago I felt a weird ping or pop feeling in my heel and had the most ridiculous bruising afterwards even though it didn't really hurt and drs weren't bothered.

@tinatsarina I've only had a couple of headaches so far. Have you had your blood pressure checked? The midwife said to watch out for headaches at the front of your forehead I think?

Well I have been feeling quite sick again this morning which I suppose I can't complain about as I worried myself silly when I felt better! I also just feel really brain foggy like I can't really focus on anything. Im about to ring my boss after putting it off all morning! Wish me luck! Xx

Good luck @janey15 with your boss. Let us know how it goes! Xx

Poor you @Laney79 that looks super painful. Hope it heals up soon! Xx

Thanks @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue It really is sad teaching is such a difficult profession because teaching the kids is a joy, it’s just everything else. Sickness is a little better today so hopefully 10 weeks is the breaking point! Xx

@tinatsarina I have this headache on my left hand side of head in exactly same place for a month. I've no idea if it's pregnancy related, I thought it was because I need root canal, but dentist said not. Dr just told me to take paracetamol. Over the last two weeks it's not been as severe, it gtes worse when lieing down and sometimes I wake up with headache. It's no way near as bad, I don't suffer from headaches and didn't last pregnancy and so it is a mystery to me. My blood pressure is low though

@Dimblebimble excellent news on your scan. Just because your lost your last pregnancies at 8 weeks, it doesn't mean it will happen this time around. I know the early days are so hard. I thought I would have another t21 pregnancy this time around because I'd had one before, this is not the case (I'm trusting the nipt) I'm still worried about chromosomal issues, but I've had two sonographer say that this is a completely different baby, and nothing like the very poorly baby of last pregnancy. Two weeks for a scan is fine, if you have one sooner, you'll only be worrying after anyway. The wait is really hard, I do realise.

@janey15 my headache is at front left side. God knows what it is but it's not related to blood pressure.

@TickTockBaby welcome to the thread! Also welcome to other newbies that joined whilst I was on hols! You're in the right place.......... pregnancy after loss/losses is so hard and everyone here understands that anxiety. Hope you have a happy and healthy 40 weeks!

@MyheartIsBrokebutIHaveSomeGlue thank you. I'm under Princess Alexandra Trust so the community midwife appointments are conveniently at the hospital a 5 min drive from my house, I don't have to go all the way to Harlow for them. Even managed to get my 20w scan at my local hospital too. It's great your boy is so active. I'm still waiting for movements to start. Thankfully and so relieved midwife found HB this afternoon and is happy with it. Just need to get through next 2 weeks now to 20w scan but hearing HB has stopped me wanting to book another scan in. She's also booked me in for a quick appointment in 4 weeks time to listen to HB again because I'm so anxious which is really good of her to do.

@Laney79 ouch! That looks so painful! Glad you got it looked at and it's not serious. Hope it settles and goes quickly.

@tinatsarina I've not had many headaches since start of second trimester and anything I'vehad is because I was tired. Hope yours go soon. Must be horrible. Are you keeping hydrated?

@janey15 hope it went well with your boss.

Woohoo I have been prescribed progesterone by the epu and have just taken my first one. Fingers crossed it makes a difference!

They also said the results of the tests on the pregnancy remains from my previous mmc are inconclusive, which apparently happens a lot, so no insight there.

@rubyroot yes, I know what you mean. Fingers crossed this pregnancy will be different, I guess the pattern of spotting and then mmc at 8 weeks makes me expect the same thing.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue yes, it's an option to have a private scan if we feel really nervous, although I feel like I'm wasting money as it's £70 for an early scan 😫 I think we'll try and wait, but if I have any more spotting I might book myself in at the local mothercare.

Eek @Laney79 that looks nasty! Hope you're okay x

@Dimblebimble I'm sooooo glad for you! That's wonderful news you saw the little baby in there with their little heart happily beating away :) I hope it's all smooth sailing from here for you and baby now!

One week until my 12 week scan. I'm excited and scared at the same time. My husband couldn't come to my emergency one at 9 weeks and they didn't give me a picture so I think it will feel so much more real once he sees the baby too. I'm scared for more family to be told though because of the pressure!

Have you told your family yet? Xxxx

@Dimblebimble that’s great news! So glad they gave you progesterone. Xx

@Dimblebimble great news on the scan and getting the progesterone

@ChikiTIKI I haven't told any family yet, but we are going to this weekend. I will be 14 weeks so not going to be able to hide it many weeks more. I am a bit scared about controlling their excitement tho as they don't know my history.

@Laney79 blimey you do look like you've been in the wars. Hope you feel better soon

@janey15 hope your conversation with your boss went well

@rubyroot sorry to hear about your headache. Is it worth getting checked out by your GP?

@Squiff70 Good luck for your scan tomorrow

Sorry to everyone I missed the thread flies

@fnej01 oh I have been to gp. Answer to take paracetamol!!

Because its not got more severe I spose I haven't been back yet, it also takes two weeks to get an appt

Thanks everyone. Phone call went really well - it felt a bit like a counselling session! I can't believe how lovely she is compared to the last two! I am going in to work tomorrow but not teaching so have some handover time with the lovely supply teacher which is great and I don't work Fridays anyway! I've basically been told to put myself first which is amazing! I'm keen to get back though as sitting around is not good for my mental health and it makes the time pass so slowly. I've actually felt nauseas nearly all day which is a relief after worrying about loss of nausea earlier in the week. I'm almost getting used to the feeling if that makes any sense?

@Dimblebimble great that you got the progesterone! I had the same pain early on in this pregnancy that I had assumed was the start of my miscarriage last time and I cried most of the way home from Italy. I guess we're just trying to make sense of a situation that's beyond our control.

@InDreamland It's great that you heard the heartbeat and that your midwife is taking your anxiety seriously. I found myself playing down my anxiety to my midwife

All this talk of headaches and now I've got one! I'm also painfully bloated now that I've eaten way too much pasta! I'm worried people at work will notice my bloated tummy and bigger boobs as I think they're quite noticeable

Just popping by to say yes @Dimblebimble! And ouch @laney79, that looks sore.

Had a minor accident on my bike today. Abdomen area is totally fine, my knees less so. I know I'm not going to be able to cycle commute throughout the whole pregnancy but am now thinking of stopping sooner rather than later. Other ways of getting to work are very much less convenient. Got my booking in appointment tomorrow. Bought second hand foetal Doppler which arrived today (I know not recommended but I couldn't resist) and found baby's heartbeat after a couple of minutes which was really special to hear (it was definitely baby and not my own heartbeat, a very distinctive sound).

@fnej01 I hope telling family goes well for you :)
I'm guessing we will tell my husband's family on Wednesday but his mum is visiting on the Friday. I don't think I will be ready for all the questions and instructions. Being told to buy a bigger house, double pram, etc etc. All the sentences starting with "you need to..." It's exhausting. She never said a word to me about my MC so if she brings it up now I will be annoyed.

Thanks all-leg is very very tender and hurts to walk on as it feels like my muscles are all contracting when I try and weight bear! Joy! Hoping the rest and elevate will start to show results soon...

In other news I got my C-section date yesterday...my little one will hopefully have his/her birthday on...New Years eve! We had the choice of 31/12 or 2/1 and I'm petrified of going into labour naturally so 31/12 it is! All feeling a lot more real now!

@Dimblebimble so pleased they prescribed the progesterone. For me, it felt like no matter what happened if I needed it and had taken that I'd done all I could to help this baby make it. Really helped me knowing that. I'd also echo what @rubyroot said about previous pregnancies. I lost both of mine within a day (approx 6 weeks based on fetal pole) and both were mmc's discovered at 9 weeks, but this one is now 24+3 and kicking away...the fear doesn't go away but if it helps each pregnancy can be different, I'm proof of that.

@tinatsarina if you are worried about blood pressure your pharmacy will check it for you. I have a home monitor which I find brilliant -really helps me when I go for appts as with my anxiety it always goes up when I see a medic, but I can show them what it's usually like thanks to the home readings. It's an omron one. Hydration is also a huge thing (not only for headaches but constipation too ). But if you're worried have a chat to gp/midwife?

@janey15 glad the call went well.

@TinyPaws ooh no! Bike accidents are horrid...how are the knees? glad to hear tum is ok but I'd be doing the same as you are in reconsidering the commute. It's one of the reasons I'm staying off with my leg. I'm not confident I can drive and do an emergency stop, if I wasn't pregnant maybe I'd be less cautious as my commute is only 15-20 mins but I'm not risking it with this little one.

Eek that's exciting @Laney79 nice to have a date set, I hope your leg gets better soon. I'm 24 weeks today and seeing the consultant on Monday so will probably raise the subject of induction, when discussing a future pregnancy with the consultant that looked after DD2 he said induction or C-section at 38 weeks is normal in a pregnancy following a stillbirth so I'm hoping this doctor agrees, which would put me between Christmas and New year.

Glad you had a good holiday @InDreamland. It's so nice that your midwife will listen to the heartbeat for you again in 4 weeks time.

Congratulations and welcome @TickTockBaby.

I'm so happy for you @Dimblebimble! Such a great feeling seeing the heartbeat when you are really expecting bad news! It's great they've given you progesterone, my GP point blank refused and told me only a specialist would prescribe it.

Ouch @Laney79! Your poor legs! Hope they get better soon. It's great you've got your official date now!

@TinyPaws I have a doppler too and it really helped reassure me between scans before I started feeling movements.