Pregnancy anxiety support thread

[Kate3150]

Hey,

I thought it would be nice to set up a group for those suffering with anxiety at whatever stage of pregnancy.
I’m approaching 14 weeks and my anxiety has been up and down, particularly as I had a loss last year.
I’m currently having therapy and trying to stay active. Eating and drinking well...

Any tips/thoughts/rants welcome. xx

@Jordan2008- I’m so sorry to hear about your losses, I too had a miscarriage and know how much harder it makes subsequent pregnancies in terms of the worry and anxiety.
It’s wonderful you’ve made it to 9 weeks, do what feels right did you in terms of an early scan. Would
It reassure you!? If it would stress you out more then don’t do it! Have you got a lot of support around you? X

@Bk356- I think I was toilet paper checking for most of my pregnancy!!! I had some real freak out moments which turned out to be nothing but when you’ve had a miscarriage every trip to the loo in subsequent pregnancies are nerve wracking.
Do you think you’re feeling like that because the anxiety is running you down? When my anxiety is peak I always feel like I have a cold xx

@Halloweenbabyy- bless your heart, can you pinpoint anything that’s caused the flare up? X

Hi Kate3150.
Thank you so much for your reply. It’s nice to be able to voice these fears without scaring my husband!! I’ve been to work today and most of the girls are feeling the same so I’m guessing it’s just a bit of a bug that’s going round. I’m hoping to have an early scan either this weekend or next but I’m not 100% sure on my dates. Do you know if there’s any risk in having an early scan as it’s usually internal? I think it doesn’t help that I’m peeing constantly so I’m terrified every time 🙈 xx

@Kate3150 thank you so much. I'm feeling a lot better today but you know what it's like you feel a bit better and just think everything's fine but in the back of my mind it could strike again at any time. It's a horrific thing to deal with and makes you second guess everything!

Oh gawd, I feel like I am living at the hospital lately for this pregnancy and I am only 23+2. I was in the kitchen this morning and went all light headed, face felt hot, could hear my heart in my ears and legs felt weak. I sat down and after taking my son to school rang the hospital midwives.

Of course with my palpations etc they wanted me to go in for an ECG. All checks they did came back ok but they are putting me foward for a 24hr hour heart monitor to see if they can catch the palpations then.

She asked if I get breathless and I said I do when going up stairs or up a slight hill (but thought this is normal for pregnancy and the previous consultant I mentioned it too didnt seem worried).

Its a bit worrying but hoping that these palps and lightheadedness are all just where I have the extra blood building in my system and will ease after 28/29 week mark.

@Raindancer411 I’m glad you’ve put this in here as I regularly can here my heart beat in my ears and this has only happened since I’ve been pregnant. I also get out of breath walking upstairs or up hills but trust thought this was normal. I’m going to mention it to my consultant today,

@RC1985 Be interesting to see what they say. My consultant didn't seem phased by it and my DH just thinks they being careful by doing extra checks to try and reduce my anxiety

@Raindancer411 I mentioned it today and she said it’s because my bloods show I’m anemic so this is why I get out of breath and can hear my heartbeat. She said it’s nothing to worry about as I’m taking iron tablets to top up my low iron. Have you had bloods recently?

Yes the last bloods were fine and she said I didn't look tired or pale so didn't check them again. I had iron tablets with my first pregnancy but cannot remember when. The dr said it was probably later in the pregnancy and to just make sure I eat leafy green veg and steak. It's not long until my next blood test in reality

@RC1985- How did your appt going yday? X

Hey @Kate3150 good thanks. She’s grown and her stomach has caught up. She’s still below 10th percentile but growing on the curve. Got another one in 2 weeks and a Doppler again next Friday. They said they won’t let me go past term so I’ll be induced at due date.

Hi ladies

Hope it’s ok to please join this thread. Am 20 weeks pregnant today with my first and just really struggling to stay calm during this pregnancy. As well as the usual worries about whether everything is ok and the baby is growing normally, I am just struggling so much with all the changes to my body. I still feel sick in the evenings, and then worry I am not eating enough nutrients. My heart is also racing and so loud and I know it’s not a panic attack, but it makes me feel scared and I don’t know how to stop it.

Any advice on how you lovely ladies stay calm with all the body changes that happen? I just keep thinking of how things could happen like diabetes, pelvic pain, pre eclampsia, anemia and everything. I know I should only think about it if it happens. But every change in how I feel I wonder if it’s one of those things. I haven’t bothered my midwife or the gp as I don’t want to be a hassle.

Any advice to stay calm and assume things are ok?

Thanks in advance

@JKD1982 I didn't want to read and run. I am finding I am struggling with a racing heart and palpations too. Got a 24hr monitor going on soon to double check but was told it is common in pregnancy, else 20-29 weeks when your blood volume gets more. Plus I think you have a slightly raised pulse rate when pregnant anyway.

As your midwife is there is any support for anxiety. I didn't have any in my first pregnancy but this time I am. I start a midwife lead anxiety group this week for 8 weeks.

Thank you @Raindancer411 I am seeing my midwife in a few weeks so will talk to her. It’s hard to admit feeling anxious as they’re so focused on the physical side of things that I don’t want to distract from that. But I will bring it up and see what she suggests

@JKD1982- I had exactly the same with the racing heart during pregnancy. When I went to bed I’d have to find a position on the pillow so I couldn’t hear my heart beat otherwise I couldn’t sleep and anxiety would get worse.
Remember all anxiety is is thoughts and thoughts cannot hurt you. Yes they’re horrible and petrifying at times, but all they are are thoughts. Reminding myself of this again and again in pregnancy is honestly the one thing that got me through!!! Xx

Thanks @Kate3150 for sharing. Why does the racing heartbeat happen in the evenings / night time? I don’t seem to get it at all during the day. Just when I start to relax or try and sleep my heart is so loud and hammering. It’s such an odd feeling and hard to ignore.

I’ve decided when it happens just to get up and read a book or do some yoga. Better to try and distract myself than lay there getting worried x

Hi everyone, can I join? I'm 26 weeks with my first baby. I have suffered with anxiety in the past but have a few CBT techniques that I use often to keep me on track. These seem to be working fine with worries about baby's health/labour etc but my anxiety about becoming a parent is out of control. I worry I won't cope with the exhaustion, I will be an awful parent and will hate my new life. These thoughts take over in the middle of the night and it's like my future is already set in stone. I haven't read through the full thread but wondered if any one else had similar struggles?

I should add that I've had a really terrible pregnancy with hypermesis gravidarum. I was vomiting multiple times a day until 23 weeks, I still feel permanently nauseaus and now being treated for anemia. Despite reassurance I can't help feeling that I'm already a terrible mother for getting so few nutrients into the baby. I know this makes no sense because I was ill but it feels like starting on the wrong foot.

@Pastnowfuture of course you can join and what your feeling is completely normal as all the ladies on here will tell you. It sounds like you’re sickness hasn’t been nice. I am currently 32 weeks and I’m having similar anxiety about being a bad mum. I haven’t had much experience with babies so have no idea what I’m doing and think I’ll end up doing the wrong thing. I’m thinking of having CBT sessions to help.

@RC1985 That is so reassuring to hear. When I have mentioned my feelings to friends the usual response is 'you will be great' which is lovely but I want to know that my anxieties are somewhat normal! I have some top-up CBT due to start 8 weeks before baby due so I'm hoping that will help.

Hi everyone, I've been holding off commenting as I don't have anything useful to say. I just feel awful.
I'm 7 weeks, I had a miscarriage last summer and a lifelong history of anxiety and depression. After a shocking experience at CBT that made me get worse (triggered memory loss & disassociation) I'm not going down that road again.
I'm on Clexane for clotting disorder detected in my blood work.
I can't be excited about this baby despite wanting to get pregnant for years. I'm convinced I'm going to get abnormalities detected at 20 week scan if I don't lose it before then.
I'm exhausted. I wake up 3 times a night for a wee and haven't slept a straight night through since Christmas. When I wake up in the night I find either my toes or my hands have gone numb.
I've had two 'funny turns' where everything has gone dark and I've lost my footing.I feel like I'm just waiting for it to go wrong really. I know other women go through worse but I keep trying to say to my GP something isn't right and I'm just getting fobbed off. I have midwives on the 4th. I've spent weeks chasing prescriptions/sharps boxes/appointments/referrals and I'm not being listened to. I've given up and I'm just waiting for the pregnancy to end early now.

I mostly just feel numb. Like I'm not here. And that I'm waiting for something and I don't know what but it definitely isn't a live baby.

@anotherypasswordtoremember firstly, please don’t ever feel like you can’t comment as you have nothing useful to say. No one on this thread would want you to feel that way. It’s about supporting each other and having a place you can express how you feel. You are welcome to comment as much as you want :)

Secondly, I am so sorry to hear about your miscarriage and the way you’ve been feeling. The way you are feeling is normal and I was the same, I couldn’t get it excited as I was convinced something was going to go wrong. I couldn’t even buy stuff and still haven’t bought stuff really. My parents have bought stuff and I’ve been given stuff but I’ve stored it at my nans partly because we don’t have the room as we’re renovating but also out of site out of mind and if something goes wrong it’s not all on my face- crazy!

it’s not as bad now I can feel baby move. My anxiety’s now are about Complications with labour and SIDS when baby is born.

I would say your midwife will be much more supportive than your GP. My GP told me he couldn’t answer my questions and to speak to the midwife. But I do think it’s bad they aren’t looking into why you’ve had funny turns as this isn’t just about the baby it’s about you. Have you tried just going to a walk in and seeing if you can get a referral from there? At least you haven’t got long to wait until your MW appointment.

@Pastnowfuture I get the same from my friends, don’t worry you’ll be great. This thread has helped me loads as you know you’re not alone.

@anotherypasswordtoremember My GP surgery totally minimised my concerns in early labour. Took me ages to get proper support for HG. However the midwives were much better so fingers crossed for your appointment on 4th. It sounds like you have it really tough. Although it's hard try not to compare yourself to others. I was also of the mindsight 'others have it worse' but it did me no good. My friend eventually said 'if you have flu you feel like shit, just because someone has a more serious illness doesn't mean you stop feeling like shit'. Look after yourself

I got my whooping cough jab tmw and a bit apprehensive over it. Anyone had theirs yet?