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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Pregnancy anxiety support thread

457 replies

Kate3150 · 13/06/2019 12:40

Hey,

I thought it would be nice to set up a group for those suffering with anxiety at whatever stage of pregnancy.
I’m approaching 14 weeks and my anxiety has been up and down, particularly as I had a loss last year.
I’m currently having therapy and trying to stay active. Eating and drinking well...

Any tips/thoughts/rants welcome. xx

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RC1985 · 06/12/2019 08:37

@peanutfoldover awww poor you. Sickness is just the worst! I didn’t have it too bad, some days/weeks were worse than others but it passed part way through trimester 2. How far along are you now?

Original poster
Kate3150 · 07/12/2019 07:21

@RC1985- How are things for you now?? Obviously I’m not a medical expert, so best to get checked out but I honestly have worn pads from very early on due to leaking urine and from a LOT of discharge. I know it’s unsettling but it can be a common pregnancy symptom, I understand it’s hard not to worry though. Have you already booked in for scan? They’re such a good idea, they honestly got me through pregnancy! Yep- few days to go, bring it on! I’m a bit on edge about him coming beforehand though, as it realllllly feels like he’s trying to worm his way out already 😳. What will be will be I guess, I’ll be happy whenever he’s here 💙 xx

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RC1985 · 07/12/2019 08:14

@Kate3150 had my midwife appt yesterday and she was happy with everything. I’ve seen some pads you can buy which detect amniotic fluid so I will prob get some. I’ve booked a scan for first week of January as I’m off work then. Think I will prob book 2 more after that at maybe 32 and 35 weeks. I’m so paranoid about my last trimester. Can’t believe you’re booked in next week. That has come round so quickly. It’s prob natural to feel a bit on edge, all we want is a a healthy baby don’t we.

RC1985 · 11/12/2019 08:33

How is everyone this week? I hope everything went well for you yesterday @Kate3150

peanutfoldover · 11/12/2019 23:33

@RC1985 My nausea has calmed right down! 8w today. It has zoomed by!

I keep having moments where it dawns on me that we will have a real actual live baby in July. It just doesn’t feel real, like I’m just playing out a scenario in my head!! I want to tell everyone and my DD(5) so I can’t talk about it and discuss all the little details.

Today my mum wanted to buy me some jeans, I found myself giving her a really overly complicated reason why I didn’t want any. Obviously, the real reason is that they won’t fit in a few months! But I couldn’t tell her that. Would love to just let my mum in on the secret.... but there’s no way she’ll keep it to herself, so I can’t!

RC1985 · 12/12/2019 08:32

@peanutfoldover glad to hear your sickness has died down. I had mine on and off until about 15 weeks. And it does fly by, I can’t believe I’m 6 months on Monday!

I’m was the same as you didn’t tell anyone for ages and it was really hard to make excuses as to why I didn’t feel well or couldnt eat certain things. At my works summer do, I had to say I was on antibiotics so couldn’t drink. But it will be 12 weeks before you know it and then at least you can tell your mum and your DD. Have you had your scan date yet?

Lcw29 · 13/12/2019 08:00

Hey I'm joining in if that's ok. I'm 29 +2 but been anxious due to having ptsd in my last pregnancy. Took some time to feel I could have another. Constantly worried the same thing will happen. Doesn't help I was in triage the last 2 days with regular painful tightenings. Turns out its Braxton hicks and I'm unlikely to go in to preterm labour within the next few weeks but am trying to rest more to make sure. The nearer it gets the more nervous feel about the birth but at same time I want baby in my arms lol

RC1985 · 13/12/2019 08:36

Welcome @Lcw29 it is a really worrying time bring pregnant (this is my first and currently 25+5) but have found speaking to the ladies on here has really helped when I’m not sure about something.

Sorry to hear you had to go into triage but at least you went in and they checked you. I think rest is a good idea but I know this can be difficult with a little one.

Have you spoken to your midwife about your anxiety?

Lcw29 · 13/12/2019 12:33

RC1985 thank you. Yes I've spoken to my midwife just need to try and put her advice into practice. That's always the hardest part!

RC1985 · 13/12/2019 13:08

@Lcw29 it is the hardest part. Has she suggested you do a number of things to relieve your anxiety? and if you’re having a low day, remember we’re always an listening ear :)

Saraj09876 · 13/12/2019 16:59

I am so glad I found this thread, I have been obsessively lathering myself in lush sleepy cream every time I have a minor inconvenience send me loopy because I read it can help with anxiety!
So reassuring that I'm not the only one checking miscarriage rates all the time!
I am 9 weeks now and had a scan that showed a heartbeat that helped, but every time my tummy does anything I'm convinced there is something wrong!
I used to be on propranolol but stopped taking about 9 months ago and haven't felt the need for it until now, but it's not clear that it's safe from what I can tell online when pregnant.
What is everyone doing to help calm themselves? Iv felt fine before the pregnancy so I'm convinced it's hormones and not something deeper rooted! I'm wondering if you guys have any quick fixes you do to calm yourself during a panic moment? Thanks

RC1985 · 14/12/2019 11:05

Welcome @Saraj09876 I did the same as you at 9 weeks and every person I speak to who is or has been pregnant felt/feels the same. I think the first part of your pregnancy is more anxious because you can’t feel them move. Once I hit 20 weeks I start feeling movement and this is a good sign. I’m still anxious but not as bad as I was. I’m going to have private scans to make sure everything is ok too as I’m classed as low risk so won’t get anymore on NHS. I don’t know anything about proparanol but I’d ask your midwife/doctor for advice on this. A few things I did to calm down was concentrate on mile stones rather than 9 months. So I’d say I’ve just got to get through to the 12 week, then 16 week appt then 20 week scan etc. The other thing is talking to your midwife, ladies on here or anyone you know who’s been pregnant as it helps. And everyone will prob think I am absolutely ga ga but when I’m really worried I talk to my grandad who’s passed, it sounds weird but it helps me calm down. I suppose if it works for me then I may as well carry on with it. But if you want to talk about your concerns you can always put it on here too. You’re not alone :)

Original poster
Kate3150 · 14/12/2019 14:12

Hey Everyone!
I will take the time to say hello to newcomers on the thread just need to have a read through of everything.
@RC1985- How are you doing my love? I cannot believe you are nearly 26 weeks pregnant!!!! So excited for you, have you got private scan booked? Before you know it she’ll be here 💜
My little bundle arrived on Tuesday and he’s just incredible, I watch him like I would the TV 😂. He’s fascinating and can’t wait for you to have little lady here 😚. How has the anxiety been? X

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Original poster
Kate3150 · 14/12/2019 14:18

@Saraj09876- Hello my darling, welcome to the thread. Tips I used during pregnancy to help....
Just accepting the way I felt, so not trying to fight the anxiety or thoughts just let them float away and they’ll eventually pop away like a bubble. Remember thoughts CANNOT hurt you. Yes they will be scary but they’re just worrying thoughts!
I also focussed on looking after myself best I could which made me feel as I was doing all I could for baby. So taking my vitamins.. eating well.. drinking well... getting plenty of fresh air and going for walks. It will also make you feel good doing those things.
Lastly just to say it will be a journey, there will be ups and downs and it may feel the end will never been in sight. But you will get through this. You’re a warrior and you can do it 😚

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Original poster
Kate3150 · 14/12/2019 14:27

@Lcw29- Hello my love! Is your anxiety around the possibility of developing PTSD again? Or are you just feeling generally anxious about the pregnancy?
It’s so hard when you’re experiencing physical symptoms as well that can add to the anxiety bless your heart.
Have you thought about talking therapies!? I had counselling during my pregnancy xx

OP posts:
Lcw29 · 14/12/2019 20:52

@Kate3150 congrats on your little one Smile its magical when they're finally here.

I think I am nervous about the PTSD and the birth. I had counselling before and my midwife has said i can refer myself again. I've also been told to try and have time for myself so my hubby is helping with that.

The past week I've been getting tightenings that were painful and regular. They were Braxton hicks but been told to rest a bit more. Theses babies keep us on our toes!

Lcw29 · 14/12/2019 20:54

I realise I've repeated myself a bit....brain not with it haha

RC1985 · 16/12/2019 20:57

Hi @Kate3150 so sorry for late reply. It’s been a hectic weekend. I’m so so happy your little boy is finally here ☺️ What a lovely Christmas you will have. I hope everything went well with the c section.

I have a scan booked for 29th dec. I am a little less anxious as I can feel her move and she’s quite active now.

ChicaXS · 16/12/2019 22:20

Hello everyone!

Can I join?
I am suffering from severe anxiety as it’s been a long winding road and the NHS have been unhelpful of recent! In essence me and my DH have been trying for 2 years with no avail. I knew I had fertility issues due to unpredictable periods and symptoms
We were referred to a fertility clinic in January and I was diagnosed with PCOS and suspected endometriosis. Then after a HSG they identified I had a blocked left Fallopian tube. I was booked in for a laparoscopy last week and IVF in February.

Miraculously on the day of my laparoscopy, my urine sample came back positive! They said the line was very faint and I could be still implanting. They cancelled the laparoscopy and ordered the same day blood test. My result was only 9 on the 10th December, they said I had to come in the next week as my results are borderline. Today I went in for another blood test and get my results tomorrow. NHS fertility clinic are now saying I’m discharged d cancelling my ivf in February which is causing me upset as I have no clear confirmation I’m pregnant!

What’s worse is that I have no idea how many weeks I am due to my PCOS. I had a period on the 29th October and another on the 19th November. Based on the period of the 19th November I’m 4 weeks.

On the plus side I’ve been taking tests and the line is getting darker.

I’m just upset at the nhs for trying to discharge me as I’m 37 and ivf is our strongest chance. I really want this baby to be the one but suffering from severe anxiety.

Any advice?

Thanks x

RC1985 · 17/12/2019 08:27

@ChicaXS Welcome. I am sorry to hear you haven’t had the best experience with the NHS. Have you booked to see the midwife as you’ll be able to explain your anxiety to her. I know @Kate3150 had counselling which helped and I’m sure she’ll give you some advice.

It took us 19 months and we were going to go for fertility tests after Xmas with the view to going through IVF. The fact it took this long (which isn’t as long as some people I know) put me on edge as I am just constantly worried about something going wrong. However, since I’ve bed. Able to feel baby move it puts me at ease slightly.

The other thing I suggest is could you get a private early pregnancy scan as they will be able to tell you how far along you are and hopefully put your mind at ease too.

ChicaXS · 17/12/2019 14:08

So the doctor called and at 4 weeks my HCG levels are still very low at 150. They are now fobbing me off to my GP.

RC1985 · 17/12/2019 18:07

@ChicaXS There are lots of reasons your HCG might be low, so you could still be pregnant. Like you say the tests have been getting darker which is a good sign. Also if you are only 4 weeks, it may take a few weeks for hcg to show. When is your appt with your gp?

ChicaXS · 17/12/2019 18:39

Hi @RC1985
Thank you. Unfortunately the nhs are just swinging me about. Called my GP today and now they want a referral letter from my fertility centre before moving forward to an EPU. It’s absolutely ridiculous. So in short I don’t know when I can see someone as they rather wait for Royal Mail post as opposed to being proactive and calling up the fertility centre (vice Versace)

Also I just tested again today and the line is slightly more lighter, I’m so gutted. Maybe it’s just me but it’s not as dark as when I tested two days ago.

I really don’t know what to do - I feel like I’m stuck in limbo.

Pregnancy anxiety support thread
Rani06 · 17/12/2019 19:28

Hi Guys,

I am 3 weeks pregnant and I am absolutely freaking out. I went to docs as I was having some cramps and spotting. They decided to book me in for a scan transviginal and stomach but was not able to spot the gestational sac. Bloods were taken to measure the hormone levels. I will have them done again in a weeks time to be compared with previous results to see if the pregnancy is progressing. Anxiety is super bad trying to stay calm and not stress out.

Raindancer411 · 17/12/2019 21:40

I just got back from the triage after being checked as been having palpitations. Had them after having my first but thought I best get checked. ECG all ok and was told they will check my bloods and let me know is any issue with that, but they can be common in pregnancy so just to keep an eye on it. So my anxiety probably is not helping. Just keep reminding myself that the Dr agreed when I said I knew it could be common