Did you take your partner to your booking in appt?

[VapeVamp12]

I have my booking in appointment with the midwife on Monday morning, she didn't mention bringing my partner but I wondered what others had done?

Oh and they asked me the DV questions while showing me where the toilet was for a urine sample, so they do find ways to ask.

My DH came with me to my booking appointment with the midwife, my 16 week appointment with the consultant and the appointment the following week again with the midwife. He has also been to all 3 scans I’ve had so far (6+6 weeks, 12 weeks and 17 weeks - private scan). Likewise I attended the appointment he had to have at the request of the midwife for some blood tests where the hospital requested parental blood (this is an IVF pregnancy using donor eggs from a community which has a higher incidence of particular blood disorders than my ethnic background so there was additional risk and testing to be carried out!)

He is equally invested in my pregnancy as me as I am carrying his children and he is concerned with both mine and their welfare. He will come to every appointment that he is available for - and they are every 2 weeks from now till the end of my pregnancy between the 4 weekly hospital visits for scans/consultant appointments and the midwife 2 weeks later each time. At no time has anyone made out he isn’t welcome to join me at the appointments nor have they asked me to attend without him. I have not been asked about DV but I am sure my midwife is asking questions of us both that give her clues one way or the other - she has also addressed questions to him at the appointments.

the last letter i had for a booking in appointment, i gave it back to the hospital while i was there having a miscarriage so i can't provide that for evidence for this thread :)

here is a link to the nhs website where it is mentioned that they ask about DV in the first appointment though:
www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/first-midwife-appointment/

and i have definitely been told over the phone not to take my husband to booking in appointments too. i am sure if i had taken him though, they would have welcomed him. you can bring someone with you to a medical appointment if you want to. its your choice.

there are posters all over maternity units about DV and posters in the toilets with peel-off phone numbers. anyone who is abusive to their pregnant partner will know full well that medical practitioners are looking out for it. i dont see why you couldnt mention it in a letter, but that said, i have not been in an abusive relationship so i can't really say if it's a good idea or not.

Honestly they’re not sending out letters saying “please attend this appointment alone as we would like to ask you whether you are a victim of domestic violence without your partner present”

Are you seriously suggesting you have received a letter saying this?

I can't be arsed to answer the same question over and over again :) bye!