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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Advice needed please, Dr wants to induce my partner at 38+5 but we want a natural birth

116 replies

daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 12:10

Hi, first time poster long time reader, normally the first place i come to then the nhs :p

My SO is 38+1 had bloated/swollen legs and feet since 33+5 and now has pain in the groin area more recently.

She's being monitored twice a week for high blood pressure since being in over night at 35+0, but been fine since. Urine sample shows minimum sugar and protein, so no scares there.

Baby is above the 90th centile weighing 8lbs at 37+3

Mucus plug started coming out at 36+6 and a failed sweep shortly after.

My question comes from what the Dr wants us to do. He makes it seem like we have 2 options, to be induced or to have a C-section because of the size of baby and how uncomfortable my SO is.

We're both quite tall and was hoping for a natural birth. Fully under the impression, everything to do with the birth was our plan unless there was an emergency and the Midwife then makes the call.

My worry is, we live in a built up area and it seems they prefer c-sections to keep the beds free, even self admitting 1/3 of births are C-section at that unit.

Any advice would appreciated, becomimg uneasy over how we're being handled by the Dr, the midwives however are great.

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GookledyGobb · 25/04/2019 12:12

The nice guidelines I’m sure say not to induce or section based on third tri scan - I’ll find a link. If that’s the only reason they’re wanting to induce or do a section then you can (and should imo) say a firm no thank you.

SirBobblyofSock · 25/04/2019 12:13

What does your partner want? Have you explicitly asked her again? The best laid plans re 'natural delivery' etc can be subject to change if the woman is uncomfortable/in pain.

BillywigSting · 25/04/2019 12:14

When I was pg the Dr wanted to induce me at a similar date due to high blood pressure (despite the medicine they gave me working perfectly well). It was for their convenience.

A second Dr came around and we compromised on letting me go to term, and if nothing had happened by then, I would be induced.

As it happens, I did end up induced, but about four days over due date as they didn't have enough beds. It wasn't as bad I thought it would be, and that extra bit of time to wrap my head around it helped immensely.

SirBobblyofSock · 25/04/2019 12:32

And by asked her, I mean told her that ultimately it's her decision?

Angelinthenightx · 25/04/2019 12:35

Go with what the doctor says is best, so your wife & baby are safe.

daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 13:02

@GookledyGobb

That link would be great, any idea what site at least?

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daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 13:10

@SirBobblyofSock

The entire birthplan is under my partners control. We are very open to each other. I naturally lead, but ive taken a step back for this, everything for the birth is her decision and if she want my input or support, I'm there. She asked me early days to support the birthplan, which i will unless circumstances become dangerous for anyone.

I also make sure we talk about every appointment afterwards.

I'm aware things can change but would prefer to keep to the birthplan that my partner wants

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daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 13:19

@BillywigSting

Induction scares us, from what i understand, if theres no labor after 32 hours, she goes straight for a C-section.

What happened during your induction, and when did they know it had worked? If you don't mind me asking

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Prequelle · 25/04/2019 13:27

^
My worry is, we live in a built up area and it seems they prefer c-sections to keep the beds free, even self admitting 1/3 of births are C-section at that unit.^

Try not to worry about that. They absolutely don't want to do sections more, it's something they're measured on and are supposed to keep low (although I'm sure NICE has said they need to stop seeing low c section rates as a target because it's negatively affecting maternal choice). C sections can result in longer inpatient stay so doesn't do anything to help bed state.

Regardless of what the doctor wants, it's up to your partner. No one can force her to have an induction or section. She just needs to be firm. If she believes the rationale is not enough then that's her decision whether it puts her at harm or not. No-one is going to drag her for one :) best of luck to you both

NicoAndTheNiners · 25/04/2019 13:30

Is the IOL being recommended purely for size of baby concerns or also for blood pressure issues?

Fatted · 25/04/2019 13:41

How is her blood pressure? I had pre-eclampsia with both pregnancies, more seriously in my last when I ended up in the hospital with it at 37 weeks. I had him by c section at 38 weeks because of it (I was booked in for an elective at 39 weeks anyway). It can be pretty serious for mother and baby.

By all means you can refuse an induction, but make sure she is carefully monitored for her blood pressure and pre-eclampsia. Taking it easy for the next few weeks.

GookledyGobb · 25/04/2019 13:53

I posted link above

BillywigSting · 25/04/2019 14:03

They gave me a pessary first to get this going. They monitor your contractions so they know how strong /regular they are etc.

I had ARM (artificial rupture of membranes, basically they pop your amniotic sack with a very thin little crochet hook type thing. Doesn't hurt at all but is a bit weird feeling). They did this in the shower so although it was messy it wasn't too bad.

Things weren't progressing as they liked after pessary and ARM so then they wanted to put me on a syntocin drip. I heard horror stories about how painful that can be so said I refused to consent until I had an epidural in place. That unsurprisingly appeared quite quickly. Also didn't hurt but was uncomfortable, they put it in under a local anesthetic and that's honestly the worst bit.

After that got my drip and hooked up to the monitor again. All was fine, contractions were strong according to the monitor but I couldn't feel them, I thought it was great. I even had a nap.

When it came to pushing I asked the midwife to turn my epi down/off so I could push, which did hurt a lot but not as much as I expected.

Start to finish I was in labour 26 hours, had a couple of tears that the midwife stitched up (didn't feel that either as she whacked the epi right back up for that bit), no instruments, no episiotomy. It was honestly a breeze compared to being pregnant.

I will put a caveat in though that I had a sweep a few days before and my cervix was favourable and I have heard that can make a big difference to how well an induction works. Mine was a very positive experience though all in all (with the exception of one particularly curt midwife at the start who refused to explain everything, she soon got short shrift)

BillywigSting · 25/04/2019 14:08

Also as pp have mentioned if it is for blood pressure make sure she is carefully monitored (I had weekly scans) and be prepared for plans to change.

Unfortunately what we want and what we need are not always the same thing

daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 14:13

@GookledyGobb

Thank you, didn't see it earlier, reply to the comments consecutively, thank you again

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Bambamber · 25/04/2019 14:15

You can refuse inductions and c sections if you so wish, it is ultimately your partner's choice.

It sounds as though they're concerned about both her health with the high BP and discomfort, and sounds as though with a big baby they're concerned about the baby getting stuck. Of course if baby gets stuck then you will need interventions anyway.

Can you get a second opinion? I would perhaps ask for a repeat sweep as well to see if you can get things moving along

daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 14:16

@SirBobblyofSock

"And by asked her, I mean told her that ultimately it's her decision?"

Yes, it's her body and her birth plan

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CloudRusting · 25/04/2019 14:21

It isn’t clear from your OP why the doctors are suggesting induction/cs. You need them to really clearly spell out why they are suggesting it, what the likelihood of success of induction is and exactly what the risks are on a probability basis to her and baby if you do not deliver at this time and allow nature to take its course. Once you have that you can sensibly assess the options including agreeing say induction at 40 weeks if no progress or if other things take place.

Your wife is absolutely free to reject any recommended medical treatment or intervention but I would only do that from a position of clear knowledge and understanding.

daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 14:24

@Prequelle

Thank you for the kind words. The Dr just made it seem that induction was safer for baby and for my partner to feel better sooner.

Im going to look into NICE, I've only just heard of them today.

We believe that baby will come when he's ready, why force manual intervention. If there's a problem, then we'll make logical decisions

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daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 14:27

@Angelinthenightx

I understand that and respect the Dr's experience and qualifications, but there's alot of umm'ing and ar'ing when giving us choice. Hasn't filled us with confidence

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LizziesTwin · 25/04/2019 14:29

You haven’t mentioned how old your partner is. If she is in pain & the baby is a healthy size why are you focussing on the birth itself rather than the best outcome, a healthy child born to a mother without long term health issues. I had 3 children, one was induced and the induction was fine, my partner missed most of that labour and I think it was probably the easiest birth.

daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 14:32

@NicoAndTheNiners

Advised on the size of baby and SO being uncomfortable.

Blood pressure was high only once, now twice a week monitored, we've changed our diet to help as she can't be as active as she wants.

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BlingLoving · 25/04/2019 14:41

It sounds to me like the dr thinks this baby is ready to come out, but isn't doing so. I do understand your resistance to intervention this early, but I'd be inclined to listen to the dr. Having said that, if it's mainly because of our partner's comfort and she's happy to remain uncomfortable for a bit longer, then of course you don't need to rush to the induction or c-section.

Having said that, I think sometimes doctors have a sense of things but they don't want to say anything specifically. I've noticed this a few times. In particular with my DD where one doctor wanted to do an emergency c section but once things calmed down he decided that he still thought it was necessary but he'd rather not do it in the middle of the night as it wasn't that urgent. He also talked about a foetal specialist seeing me. Which never happened. Two days later, DD was born by emergency c section and if they hadn't caught the problem earlier she probably would have died. I've always wished I could have seen him again to ask him what he had been thinking two days previously.

daddytrashpanda · 25/04/2019 14:47

@Fatted

Blood pressure is now fine, it was only the once she was in. Sorry to hear you had Pre-eclampsiaI, Dr has ruled it out, but still keeping fingers cross.

She doesn't like being restricted, plus she's a hard worker. She wears herself out and then starts worrying, which isn't good for either of them, so it endings in pregnant mummy tears. I make her to take it easy, makes me the bad guy i know but she needs to have her legs up to help with the leg and feet swelling. Her stubborness doesn't make it easy, but if pregnancy was easy, everyone would do it.... Well you know

My respect goes out to all mums, in particular those who do it all themselves

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