Advice needed please, Dr wants to induce my partner at 38+5 but we want a natural birth

[daddytrashpanda]

Hi, first time poster long time reader, normally the first place i come to then the nhs :p

My SO is 38+1 had bloated/swollen legs and feet since 33+5 and now has pain in the groin area more recently.

She's being monitored twice a week for high blood pressure since being in over night at 35+0, but been fine since. Urine sample shows minimum sugar and protein, so no scares there.

Baby is above the 90th centile weighing 8lbs at 37+3

Mucus plug started coming out at 36+6 and a failed sweep shortly after.

My question comes from what the Dr wants us to do. He makes it seem like we have 2 options, to be induced or to have a C-section because of the size of baby and how uncomfortable my SO is.

We're both quite tall and was hoping for a natural birth. Fully under the impression, everything to do with the birth was our plan unless there was an emergency and the Midwife then makes the call.

My worry is, we live in a built up area and it seems they prefer c-sections to keep the beds free, even self admitting 1/3 of births are C-section at that unit.

Any advice would appreciated, becomimg uneasy over how we're being handled by the Dr, the midwives however are great.

@daddytrashpanda

I was the same, I kept trying to do everything. It's only really looking back now I understand why my blood pressure was always so high. I worked full time, got told my job was being made redundant six weeks before I went on mat leave and I had a toddler. I just kind of took it in my stride because everyone tells you pregnancy isn't an excuse but wish I took it easier!!

The day I ended up at hospital, I had gone to the zoo. It was a warm day and I was hot, enormous and exhausted but spent all day walking around. When I got to the hospital and told them everyone basically told me I was an idiot wandering around all day in my condition!

i want to be induced this pregnancy :( was induced with my first and now desperate to be induced with this one, doesnt have to be early just .. on time :(

I have had 3 babie, 2 of them were born at 10lbs + and at 42 weeks

The third was born at 38 weeks and was 8lbs. (I was ill and had to be induced early)

I was induced for all 3.

My initial intention was a natural birth, instead I ended up with an induction epidural etc with dc2 and inductions with dc 2 and 3.

In all honesty, I waited the maximum time as I wanted a natural birth. It failed each time, and so instead I twice had to give birth to a bowling ball.
If I could go back in time, I would be induced at 40 weeks on the dot with each one.

@BillywigSting

Thank you for being so open. You've explain a lot of grey area's through your experience.

How many weeks was you at?

I'm a little confused on wether you had the sweep or not.

I'm so happy it went well for you

@Bambamber

Yes, we plan on a repeat sweep if they can. We would prefer to try naturally and interven if there's any complications. As our birthplan already states.

We have looked to the GP's midwife, for advice, just waiting to hear back.

@CloudRusting

I made it as clear as the Dr had stated : "because of the size of baby and how uncomfortable my SO is"

It was like bleeding a stone. Believe me, we asked those questions and more. A few was even ignored or politically handled.

Ready for the next appointment, I'm reading into NICE and taking all the helpful advice here to compile a question list on paper, we will get answer to before we leave.

@LizziesTwin

21 (30-35)

I'm respecting her birthplan. The risk of the induction not working puts worry on a C-section happening.

We obviously want baby and mother to be healthy. What indicates long term health issues to you?

I don't understand how you can possibly focus on the outcome without focusing on the birth, they're directly related.

Surely it's more natural and healthier to have baby without intervention. unless one or both are threatened, which at this moment in time no one is.

I was at 40+5 (I think, it was five years ago so I can't remember exactly)

I had a sweep about two weeks before I was induced (this was at a standard mw appointment, it's also where they picked up my ever increasing blood pressure, headaches, and rib pain, all indicators of pre eclampsia. I had no protein in my urine though so it was ruled out but I was closely monitored after that)

The sweep didn't hurt at all either (because everything was basic ready to go already), so I was probably pretty close to giving birth naturally anyway, but the longer I carried ds the more dangerous it was for both of us realistically. I just wanted his lungs to be fully developed!

@BlingLoving

They said baby is really low and she losses more plug each day. We're still a little short of the 'term'. My partner is a very strong willed and I'm sure if anything was to change she would tell me.

It's so great such decisions were made saving your baby. If our Dr sounded urgent or definite i would trust their judgement. At this stage it seems like guessed advice

@Fatted

Yeh, you hard working mums are a right pain, when will you learn.

@Dvg

Don't mean to overstep but why was you previously induced and what happened? Why do you want to be induced now?

@steppemum

What was you ill with?

We'd probably be more comfortable if they suggested it not at the earliest point of the term

@daddytrashpanda

Just because he was a week overdue, weighed 9lb6 which i thought would be huge but was actually fine and i didnt get a tear down below.

Want to be induced just because it was nice knowing the day that i would go in rather than waiting impatiently and also he came super quick which might have been a fluke but hopefully this one comes quick too :D was induced at 1pm, slept for 3 hours til 4pm and baby was born at 5.30pm.

I also didnt have a epidural as i was waiting til i needed it but to be honest i didnt feel the need to have it so just had the morphine :)

I will be in the same situation on Monday when I have my extra scan for ‘growing large babies’. I was lucky in that my first was 10lb 2oz but they estimated her to be 8lbs so no one talked about what to do with her birth in terms of size.

I had a really straight forward ‘natural’ birthday with an epidural and no intervention and minor tears and grazing. I declined all sweeps (because I wanted minimal intervention and believe they only work if the baby is ready anyway) and asked them to let me go to 41 weeks before discussing my options. Luckily I went into spontaneous labour at 41 weeks!

This time baby is measuring about 11lbs+. I’m going to see how my consultant appointment goes on Monday but in my head I want them to let me go to term and then if baby isn’t here go for an elective c-section. I will be declining/ refusing an induction as I don’t want to be induced. Having birthed a ‘big’ baby before I feel confident my body can do it again so want to try and have another ‘natural/ spontaneous’ labour even if baby is 11lbs. Like you my husband and I are really tall and my daughter was all length and I expect this baby to be the same!

@Dvg

Is that because you're quite tall by chance?

We have the same plan for the epidural

Right, I'm going to bite. There's an awful lot of 'we' here and while I appreciate you have jointly made a birth plan, in the event, the choice of an epidural is not one that needs to be made jointly or even should be. You might even find that your partner doesn't want you to touch her or be anywhere near while all this is going on.

We believe that baby will come when he's ready, why force manual intervention

I understand what you’re saying, but that’s quite an idealistic perspective. There are many reasons that babies don’t just “come when they’re ready”, especially when most babies are ready at 37 weeks.

If there's a problem, then we'll make logical decisions

This presumes you will know about a problem with enough time to make logical decisions, unfortunately that’s not always the case.

I had to have an emergency cs for my twins at 35+1 - only warning sign was that I felt generally unwell. If I had gone in an hour later, one of my sons would not have survived.

Every pregnancy and labour is individual. The doctor cannot tell you what will happen to your partner if you induce or if you don’t. They can make assessments based on their broad experience. If they feel it’s best to induce, it’s because based on their experience of seeing the outcomes for many women with similar (but not identical) circumstances to your partner, they feel this gives her the best chance of a positive outcome.

I work in my local maternity service - some of the consultants are patronising tossers to be honest, but I’ve never seen any of them pushing interventions that they feel are unnecessary. They’ve all had to deal with the deaths of babies and mothers when things go wrong, and if sometimes they err on the side of caution then I can’t really blame them.

I can say that they never ever push interventions for the mother’s comfort when it’s not in the child’s best interests.

@Daddytrashpanda

Haha i wish, i'm 5ft 2 so quite short :D

Good about the epidural because i generally dont feel you need it unless your labour ends up really really long, i would definitely vote morphine for the contractions.

The only thing i would suggest is if she does get induced... get them to prepare the painkiller because you go from 0-100 Real fast :D

Right, I'm going to bite. There's an awful lot of 'we' here and while I appreciate you have jointly made a birth plan, in the event, the choice of an epidural is not one that needs to be made jointly or even should be. You might even find that your partner doesn't want you to touch her or be anywhere near while all this is going on.

Thank you!

@BabyNameQ

Please let me know how it goes? Really wish you good luck on your plans. You've given a vote of confidence here.

Did they mention what trouble there could be with having a large baby?

Did they suggest an early induction?

@daddytrashpanda

They mentioned all of these things at my initial consultant appointment back at 12 weeks and I’m sure we’ll go through them in detail on Monday so will let you know!

I’m sure they’ll talk about all the risks and maybe talk induction but I had continuous contractions (no breaks) so no way I’m heightening that experience with an induction. Having a child already means a c-section isn’t ideal (can’t pick her up, drive etc) but i’ll take that over an induction if I have to.

38+1 had bloated/swollen legs and feet since 33+5 do they suspect preeclampsia, if yes the induction might not be due to the baby weight.

If there is no sign of pre eclampsia, and their only worry is the size of baby and your SO being uncomfortable, I’d tell them straight that induction is NOT an option and you will proceed with the birth plan you want. You sound extremely sensible, and I have no doubt you will opt for an induction/section if it’s genuinely warranted, but just because your SO is uncomfortable and they predict your baby to be big, is unbelievable. Growth scans are notoriously unreliable. It is your SO’s body and 100% her choice. Sometimes you need to be firm. For what it’s worth, my partner and I were pressured to have an induction at term because they were concerned about me being on blood thinners, there was no research to back up their claims and we turned it down numerous times due to the risk of unnecessary intervention; forceps/ventouse/section. I went into labour naturally, had only gas and air, and gave birth in the pool, all as I had planned.

Did they discuss with you Shoulder dystocia term? This is also the reason doctors might want to speed up things.

@SirBobblyofSock

I didn't put any bait out... If you read back, I've said, it's her plan and i will honour everything she wants. I haven't mentioned, she has prioritised what order she currently want on the birthplan, so there's no No's but just pushed to the back of the priority list, covering everything we know about. I'm using the term 'we' because I'm the birth partner and will agree to everything she wants.

I'm intrigued, are you a single parent, or with partner? If you're with partner did you not go through the pregnancy together? (we)

There's always going to be someone to try and pick up wether i say her (leaving her alone to do it on her own) me (I'm taking over everything which isn't my choice) we (as you have said). Forbid me to be that worried, I'm asking strangers for neutral advise through trying to be a good partner looking into this as much as possible never to have had a child before. I'm here for advise on what the Dr has said, please keep on topic