Staying posifrickentive- Thread 17 for ladies pg after mc

[SayItIsntSo1]

I couldn't see a new thread.

Hope you all find this one ok!

@mogulfield thank you, that's really helpful - it's so confusing how much it differs from place to place. One place they're really understanding and on the other hand they treat you like you're being hysterical for no reason. Sounds like you had really shoddy treatment, I'd definitely complain.
I had to explain to the doctor receptionist why I wanted to see the GP about a scan referral and when I said I'd had a MCC she just looked at me blankly and said 'You'll have to wait til 8-10 weeks to see the midwife' as though I was trying to pull one over on her. Gave up in the end! I know they must see a lot of people with varying issues/conditions but I do think some people could do with a bit more compassion.

@whyhastherumgone
Waves to you, I remember you from around Christmas time (I was on some of the same threads as you at the time with my second mc). Just wanted to say please try to not stress about symptoms. I can honestly say that other then a few extra headaches I have had almost no difference whatsoever in this pregnancy from my other two unsuccessful
ones. I am 17.5 weeks now, so hoping that everything is on track. Some of us are just luck when it comes to feeling rough, but after my mc I really wanted the reassurance of masses of symptoms which I just haven't gotten. Try to stay calm and remember each individual pregnancy is completely different to any that have gone before. The odds are still in your favour. If you need a reassurance scan then totally go with that. I had one at 9+2 and the ladies in the epu reacted so positively to everything they were seeing that i did begin to think that this could be real. It's really tough. Wobbles all over the place, but today I am pregnant. And I only have to get through today, I can worry about tomorrow when it starts.

@Miami81 hello! I remember you too - I'm so happy to see you here and thrilled to hear you are 17.5 weeks :) nice to see a familiar "face"
Thank you - i'm doing that thing where i'm hoping for all the reassuring symptoms too but it's reassuring to hear you haven't had many either. i think i will definitely have an early scan - and i'm going to try and stay away from other threads and just stick with the positive supportive ones like this one. It's so nice to have a place where other people know exactly what you're feeling like, although it's so sad that so many of us have been through the same thing.

@whyhastherumgone Welcome! So pleased to have you on the thread, congratulations.

Don't worry (as if THAT'S possible, but you know what I mean) re: symptoms. Mine were WAY stronger in the early days with my MMC than with this pregnancy (which has so far made it to 13+3, with a successful scan at 11+1). With this pregnancy I really had no symptoms before 6+4 when they suddenly hit with a vengeance and I've puked every day since!

Getting an early scan is such a minefield. There are women on other threads who've never had a MC who have somehow managed to book in for early reassurance scans at 6 weeks, but women in this thread who had MC and MMC and aren't being allowed one. So frustrating. I had two because of bleeds - obviously the bleeding was horrible and worrying but it was so reassuring to see the heartbeat each time. (Although I'm still convinced between every scan that everything has gone wrong - I have a private scan on Sunday (because I want to know I've made it through the first trimester) and I'm petrified!).

Hello @peachgreen thank you :) I think this thread is going to make all the difference to my mental state this time, whatever the outcome.

I'm glad your early scans were okay and will be keeping everything crossed for you for your next one - 12 weeks feels so far away right now, I'm only just 5 weeks tomorrow [I think, my dates are a little sketchy due to slightly wobbly cycles after mmc].

Hello rum . Welcome to the thread.

Utter I think it's the wrong orifice to be piles but I do wonder whether my cervix isn't as strong these days. On the plus side there's been no bleeding for a couple of days so all is back to normal. Ish.

I'm drinking fizzy water by the bucketload minniemouse, with a drop of posh cordial. Permanently thirsty. I allow myself 1 full caffeine latte a day and have completely gone off tea and wine so it's fizzy water all the way. I'm off for a long weekend with my family to celebrate my folks reaching 70 and have no idea how I'll pull the wool over their eyes. I don't really want to say anything until I know this pregnancy is viable but they will definitely notice that I'm not drinking. Any ideas?

Hi rum welcome and congrats! Same as peach here - I only got early scans due to bleeding and they were very hesitant to scan just for reassurance. So frustrating how the early pregnancy care differs in each area - surely they should all be working along the same lines!

Not much to report here - I felt sooo much better yesterday sickness-wise that DH and I went out for tea and I ended up having a spicy pizza - bad choice - sickness has returned with a venegeance and once I was completely empty the dry heaves were absolutely killing me feeling horrendous today. Poor DD is going to have a bit of a boring day. I need to try sparking water!!

I saw something about a tinder-style baby names app on the baby names forum and decided to check it out - omg so addictive! It's quite fun and actually some good suggestions! Links up with your partner so if you swipe right on the same name it logs it as a match

Hi all hope you're all ok...

@whyhastherumgone welcome and congrats.

Had my midwife appointment this morning. 27 weeks today, fundal height is measuring ahead by a week still and she's now sort of transverse. They listened in on her, she had hiccups the whole time which is funny to hear on the Doppler. I've been stabbed a million times with them trying to get blood from me. Bp and urine are fine too. Been having a bit of dizziness but maybe that's the heat and all the jobs we've been doing over the last couple of days. They've also referred me to a physio as spd is starting up again. Got my matb1 form too.
Have to go back in 4 weeks for a check up again.
Baby is really active now they've prodded and poked at her which is good.

Got lots to do again today downstairs. All of upstairs is finished, tidy and clean. Feel much better for having a clear out and freshen up of the paint work up there.

Hope everyone has a good day 😊

Just catching up with everyone. Hope you are doing well. We found out the sex for our two children because I wanted to bind but DH wants our third to be a surprise. I feel I can't really say no, since he went along with what I wanted the other two times.

I'm worrying about symptoms again. I had really sore breasts with my first mmc, was incredibly anxious in both my two successful pregnancies because I barely had any symptoms at all, then in my most recent miscarrige I generally forgot I was pregnant as I felt like normal. This time I have sore breasts again - like little stabbing daggers and already have heartburn. I hate all this worry!

I've always hated early scans as I have yet to have one at an EPU and not be told I have miscarried, but am considering it this time round. I know it makes no difference to the outcome really but I just wish I could have a little window to check in on the baby and make sure all is ok.

Hi and welcome Rum. My EPU is very good at doing reassurance scans, the next one over is terrible. It is such a lottery what care you get. I am so sorry you are struggling with it.

That all sounds good Amy. I have done some housework and baked a cake, then had a friend round for coffee. I feel very good for having managed it.

I have my 12 weeks scan date too. 4th of august. If my dates from the last scan are right (and I know they are very close), then I will be 11 weeks and 6 days, which is close enough to the 12 weeks for my mind to be at ease. Excited

Hello everyone and thanks for the lovely welcome.
I spoke to my EPAU today and they were lovely, very helpful but did say their criteria is two miscarriages to get an early reassurance scan, not one, so I wouldn't be able to get one on the NHS unless I have problems.
Touch wood that won't be the case so I think I'm going to leave it til the end of next week when I will be around 6 weeks and then see if I can get a private scan for 7 - 7.5 weeks. Already nervous at the thought of it, although I am feeling a lot more positive about this pregnancy which is good.

Glad the EPU were helpful Rum, even if they couldn't give you a scan. We're paying for a private scan next week because my booking in was at 11+1 and I really want to know that we made it through the first trimester. Feeling better than I have done in weeks which is scaring me slightly, even though I know it's totally normal at 13+3.

Depending where you live @whyhastherumgone you might be able to go to another hospital or have a walk in EPU within driving distance. I think trusting your instinct means a lot with pregnancy - I knew with both my miscarriages things weren't quite right and whilst I suffer awfully with anxiety, the pregnancies that did go well didn't have the same gut feeling. So far, this one I feel good about although I have sore breasts which I have only ever had when I had a mmc but I've had two successful pregnancies since then and lots of other twinges and things feel right. When ttc the tww seems such a long time, but when pregnant the first trimester goes on forever!!

Lovely to read updates and all sounding ok for folk. Glad EPAU at least explained things to you, Rum - ours explicitly say they don't offer reassurance scans but they are very accommodating if you turn up (self referral open clinic) - I had pain over the weekend and got myself in a state so went, was worried they'd turn me away but they didn't hesitate to scan when I explained history. Yours might be similar?
Def worth waiting til 7 weeks to up likelihood of seeing a hb.

Not long til your dating scan Brenna! That's fantastic.

I love seeing people much further along on this thread Amy. Great that the mw appt went well.

Few symptoms at all atm, I am tired and my sense of smell is superb. I had more symptoms when I had my MMC, weirdly. I'm sorry your symptoms are worrying Fuzzy. I find it hard to interpret things given mmc and 'successful' pg, I just think each situation is different and of course we're all a bit older and in my case, less fit which might change things.

Welcome rum glad to hear you epu were good with you :)

I have a reassurance scan on Monday and I'm starting to panic, I've totally disconnected myself from this pregnancy (which could explain why I think I don't have many symptoms - just blocking them out) I'm beginning to think I'll be going in to be told it's another MMC and I'm dreading those words!!

Tho 1 of my obv symptoms thay I Cantu block out is being goosepimply and chilled! It's horrible but is thankfully coming and going so not there all the time

I hope your first trimester doesn't go too slowly Fuzzy. I have found this time that the farther into it I get, the quicker time is going and the more positive my mood is becoming. The first 4 weeks were very, very slow and I was so depressed. Now I feel, if not bright, at least functional. I hope the same happens for you.

Best of luck on Monday Tea. I hope you manage to find something to distract you until then. Waiting for scans is hard.

Thank you, working Tomor and will keeps busy with the kids on Sunday so should be fine

I have my first second trimester scan on Sunday (will be 13+6) and I'm absolutely terrified. Every day I feel a little bit better physically which leaves me feeling a little bit worse emotionally... even though I KNOW symptoms should be going away by now and it's totally normal, I'm still so paranoid that it means something's gone wrong. Argh! Does this worrying every stop?!

Feel a bit low today, not sure what's caused it. I don't know if it's because I'm 5 weeks today and everything stopped at 6 last time so I guess I have that in mind. I also work for myself and have underestimated my tax bill for next year so got to make up some money by January, but work has really dried up and I'm struggling to focus because my head is full of pregnancy.
Sorry to bring the mood down, not sure what's got into me today. I just feel this sense of panic about everything, work, pregnancy, money...
Hopefully it will pass.

@peachgreen I think I would feel the same - will keep everything crossed for you that all goes well.

@Brenna24 I think that's how I feel right now, the down side of it I mean!

Lots of good luck wishes Peach. My niece has had a miscarriage too, she is just past the 20 week anomaly scan and she is still more anxious than happy. I don't think the fear ever fully leaves.

Hugs Why. I was so down the first week especially. I think now when I hear "You are pregnant" what my brain hears is "You are going to lose a baby". I grieved for a week. My moods were really up and down for the next few weeks but they are starting to improve now. I hope you get better the further long you go.

I have a dog staying with me for 10 days. We have been to the beach then i had hot chocolate. The wee dog is now snoring his little head off next to me, utterly exhausted. Yesterday we had visitors in the morning and went to my friend's in the afternoon. He was so tired by dinnertime that he ate his dinner lying down. I hope he has rested a bit by dinnertime today.

What kept my marbles in check at that start was flipping "you're gonna lose this baby" to "why should I lose this baby?"

It did actually keep me on the straight and narrow

Thank you Lifeofpies and Brenna24.

Thinking of you for Sunday peachgreen and whyhastherumgone.

I will remember that and try repeating it TheLegendOfBeans along with "today I am pregnant" which has been what I have spent so many other occasions chanting in my head.

I'm another one suffering from goosebumps and the cold. I had no idea it was a pregnancy thing and just thought it was me - I do tend to feel the cold no matter what the temperature.

Typically I've been having a symptomless day so come on here for support and I know have ligament stretching cramps and a runny nose. My nose running and headaches are my typical pregnancy symptoms and I usually have the kind of easy pregnancies most women who haven't ever miscarriaged would love to have, whereas many women who have suffered miscarriages often agree with me that symptoms are reassuring.

I am with you there Fuzzy. I have said to many people there is a definite inverse correlation between how physically rotten I am and my mental state. It is like a wee seesaw.

Wow, lots going on in the thread while I've been busy! Welcome @whyhastherumgone

AmyB well done on your great appointment, and on the house work! We took down a stud wall last night (I wasn't allowed to lift anything heavy of course, but I helped clean it all up!) and have soooo many interconnected house projects that now we really need to get done by December! Thank god for 2nd trimester energy; everyone says I'm looking great so I'll take it lol. Also keeping really fit recently, feeling fierce and quite proud of myself Bump is still tiny at 17 weeks, sigh...but we had a great appointment on Monday with the heart chugging away on the Doppler! I can't wait to see it again next month at the 20 week scan!

Speaking of scans and "it", we're not finding out the gender. It's our first, so it won't make any difference with sorting through supplies etc. I do understand about wanting to know, though, as I do still wonder about the baby I lost. Practically speaking, though, I wouldn't be able to keep the name a secret if we knew ahead of time, it would slip out! We've picked a name for a girl and have a couple boy options to choose from, so that's one thing sorted. Now to figure out what the %$&* to do about a car seat and pram lol, it's a minefield! X