Staying posifrickentive- Thread 17 for ladies pg after mc

[SayItIsntSo1]

I couldn't see a new thread.

Hope you all find this one ok!

I'm so glad we have this thread, so much of what you're all saying echoes with me. I don't really believe I will end up with a baby at the end of this, and I too feel a bit jealous of women who say 'I'm 5 weeks pregnant can't wait for the 12 week scan', whilst I'm there wondering if il make it.
I'm also obsessed when the symptoms die down a bit! By dates I should get a 12 week scan on 24 July, which seems an age away!!

utter friends of mine were encouraging me to have an early scan but I just don't want to, same as you it doesn't really help. They were trying to be nice but haven't had MC so don't quite ubderstand.

I feel unbelievably dire today. Vomiting between tasks at work. Roll on Friday when I finish work for 2 months and can sleep and vomit in peace.

Oh no bean at least it's a good sign. I work from home so when I feel too dire I go for a little walk! Some sheep have broken into our paddock so may go and tell them where to go, need some fresh air as feel like I'm about to vom- haven't actually been sick once yet. But feel like it may help if I did!

It used to help. Now I just feel like I might not stop.

Actually had my first 'oh my god get me a rich tea before I throw up moment' in a while! My knees were all shaky & everything.

Yay!

That must be so confusing Brenna but at least they explain the overall picture is reassuring?
My dates are always wrong because I have ridiculously long cycles.
By my LMP (my miscarriage) I should be 13 weeks this week but I'm 9 on Wednesday. Not sure if this could be you but that's why I never match up!

Poor you Bean

Yes, I have quite long cycles too yellow. I ovulated on day 18 so I was not surprised to be behind where my LMP put me. Just glad to be still in the game at this point.

Brenna it is very difficult. I spoke to my cousin who experienced recurrent miscarriage when I got pregnant this time and she said that it is literally a day at a time and that it is a slog. she congratulated herself every evening for getting through one more day and still being pregnant! I like that approach. I try not to look too far ahead or get too worked up.
Today was first consultant appointment. It was fine they have a wee plan to monitor me. Next appt in 3 weeks, so glad DH was with me as he pretty much insisted that they do a scan even though they weren't planning to. He was like, you just had a massive chat with us about DW anxiety and now you aren't going to scan - crazy. So anyway we got to see wee buddy again, which was great.
I think also this morning whilst I was in a kind of half dream state I had my hand on my belly and I think the wee thing moved so significantly, proper alien moment!!

Well, I called the midwife this morning as I'd had more discharge and bad pelvic 'heaviness' / discomfort. They said that the fact that my cervix felt open is nothing to worry about because it WILL feel open after a D&C / ERPC post-MMC, the same as if you've given birth vaginally. Such a relief to have that confirmed. But they were concerned about the pain and discharge so got me to come in anyway. All is fine, cervix is closed internally with no funnelling and a good length. But they do think I have an undetected UTI and said it was good I came in as otherwise it wouldn't have been picked up until my 16 week appointment.

They were lovely and not too worried re: the cervix-checking at this stage of pregnancy but said it's not a good idea simply because your cervix changes every day in pregnancy and it's not a reliable indicator of anything.

Thanks to those who were supportive, I really appreciated it.

Good to hear Peach

You are right Miami. It is one day at a time. Sometimes half a day.

Peach I'm so glad you spoke to them and got some reassurance and they were lovely! Good to know about the cervix, had never even thought! Must resist the urge to have a feel!

It's so sad isn't it. I've been really cross with myself for getting attached to this one. I mean, I'm not even 6 weeks, so I shouldn't let my heart get set up for more breaking, right?! Which is the worst thing!! Why shouldn't I get to be excited about this, when it's something I so desperately want!!! Anyway, sorry for the rant.

@DancingUnicorn I know what you mean. There was a poster in the maternity unit today recommending that you talk and sing to your baby as soon as you know you're pregnant as it helps with later bonding. No way do I feel ready to start thinking about this pregnancy as an actual baby. Not even close.

Hi ladies, I've been reading through your posts and getting a lot of reassurance from them - thank you. I miscarried earlier this year and am now just over 6 weeks pregnant. Had a heavy bleed last week so went for a private scan last night which showed a heartbeat, this happened last time though and the heartbeat stopped within 2 weeks after that so I'm still petrified. How on earth are we meant to get through 9 months of this anxiety??

Catlady I'm really hoping the anxiety shifts to a more 'normal' pregnancy anxiety later down the line.... I'm sorry for your loss. There's really no getting over it, is there?

Glad alls well Peach.

I can't not get attached to my little bean. I've tried to take a step back but I find it impossible.
My DH said to not get excited that way if I mc again it'll be easier. Bollocks! If I mc again I'll be DEVASTATED. But at least with a positive outlook I can spend the weeks feeling happy albeit a kind of anxious happy! and not depressed, even before the worst happens!
Thursday can't come quick enough.

Hi CatLady congratulations. If you see the crazy I have unleashed in this thread in the past couple of days you will see we get through it by wobbling on here to the lovely supportive other ladies and do it one day at at time (or parts of the day thereof if even one day is too much for you). 9 months is way too long for me to think of. My next goal is 2 weeks today for a 9 week scan. If that goes well I might start thinking ahead to 12 weeks.

Sounds like such a great mindset yellow. Much better than my being attached but cross with myself about it! Maybe I'll try that for a while!

@DancingUnicorn the way I see it; if it all goes tits up, at least I've had a happy few weeks.

I can't wait until we're all in the 'safe zone'

Thanks DancingUnicorn, I think this must honestly be one of the most stressful experiences but we somehow get through it.
yellow I tried to do the whole not thinking about being pregnant but it's impossible with this sickness! Hope it all goes well on Thursday.
Breanna it sounds like we're at the same stage, I got told I was 6weeks 5 yesterday. It's lovely to know there's so many supportive people out there

Bad day for me. Vomiting awful so sent home from work and saw doc and started anti sickness.

Hi Catlady, very close. I am somewhere inbetween 7 weeks 1 day and 8 weeks 1 day depending on whether you believe the scan (7+1), ovulation (7+5) or LMP (8+1).

Sorry you've had such an awful time bean. Sounds grim. I hope the meds kick in for you.

Oh bean I'm so sorry. Really hope the anti-sickness meds help and fast. I just vomited so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye (I literally felt it happen, it was horrid!) so you have my sympathies. I only vomit once or twice a day, and always in the morning / evening so I'm very lucky in the grand scheme of things - though if my boss has to witness me dry heaving any more times I think he might fire me!

We're getting there, ladies. Day by day. My best friend is giving birth RIGHT NOW and it's reminded me that this journey does take you to a wonderful place (we hope and pray) and it WILL all be worth it. Day by day.

@Brenna24 I meant to tell you - I was 5 days behind judging by my LMP and a day behind judging by my ovulation date at my 8 week scan and have now at 11+1 been put forward so far that I'm 2 days ahead of my LMP! It's such a guessing game early on. Hopefully you get the same thing - it's lovely to suddenly gain a free week!