Devestated at potential CS. Please tell me your positive stories

[Hollyhop17]

Hi, I am 36 weeks and due to HG scheduled for an induction at 38 weeks. At my scan today they told me he has turned from head down and is now breech. I have booked in for a manual turn next week but if that doesnt work I am likely to have a c section, which I really dont want.

Due to HG, I will only be pregnant once and so sad at the thought of not experiencing labour. I am also incredibly worried about bonding and what I will be able to do in the first days and weeks.

Please share your positive birth and post natal stories.

A very scared and upset FTM

Oh op, you poor thing! Here is my basic story.

For DS, once my contractions started they were maximum 5 mins apart, but mostly came on top of each other - none of that 20 mins, then 10 mins count down. 18.5 hours of almost constant contractions.

Went to hospital at 2pm because pain was so intense. They knew I wanted a drug free birth but sent me home with pain meds because "if you were really in labour you'd take them".

Went back to hospital a few hours later because pain was so bad. Made to feel like I was being difficult but DS delivered at 11:45.

DS was back to back. I cannot describe the pain. It was so so horrible. He got stuck so they used forceps. Obstetrician didn't wait for local anesthetic to work before she stuck them in, I jumped and ended up with a fistula. It was horrible. I had to have a colostomy bag for 4 months and 3 operations to fix it. This included a week in hospital without my breastfed DS to get the colostomy bag out. It was a very stressful time.

My first month home was complete bed rest. I was only allowed to stand for 10 mins per day and breastfeed lying down.

After that I had to learn to deal with the colostomy bag, so couldn't go out and take my new baby wherever I wanted. Just short jaunts (when I got brave enough) to places a toilet was very near by. I was so anxious and traumatized I cried all the time.

So 3 years later I was ready to have my beautiful twins girls. I was told a CS was an absolute must because of the damage done last time. I was relieved I wouldn't have to go through the pain of labour again.

Got to hospital at 7am and checked in - like going to a hotel. Went into surgery at 9. Everyone was so cheerful and happy and it was so exciting! I was holding my beautiful babies only 15 mins later. Within the hour I was stitched up and breastfeeding both babies.

Let me tell you, you can absolutely cope with the lack of sleep a hell of a lot better without the exhaustion of labour! The CS scar tissue is numb and they give you painkillers so by day 3 you're getting around as well as if you'd had a normal vaginal delivery.

My midwife nanny also told me CSS have a much higher rate of positive outcomes for both mums and babies. It's not in the interest of hospitals for this to be a widely known fact.

Enjoy your CS and baby. I would recommend it every time.

Sorry for typos. Babe awake and can't check for errors!

Honestly, I loved my EMCS! The anaesthetic wears off in a couple of hours and after initially getting up and feeling a bit wobbly it all comes back very quickly. I had very little "pain" as long as I was careful. I went home the next day via Mothercare and was walking around fine!

I have bonded with no problems at all. Did struggle to feed for a couple of days because she was so sleepy but we got there!

It's funny you mention control - I liked the EMCS because I felt in control. I enjoyed knowing where, when and how I would have her,

Recovery was way quicker than anticipated too. Twisting is tricky but lifting your little baby is absolutely fine.

I had an EMCS, so can't say anything about electives, but I was out of bed the next morning and home after 2 days, was able to breastfeed, lift baby, carry in the sling..
A lot of women these days are made feel like you need to have all natural labour to have a great experience, but have to agree with a pp - labour is overrated. As long as it's the right decision for your and your baby's health, it will be a great birth regardless.

I was in your exact situation except DD was breech from 30 weeks or so and never moved head down. I cried and felt so disappointed. But honestly the ELCS was fine. From friends/family who had EMCS it was a totally different experience, much less stressful. It had no impact on bonding or breastfeeding (I BF for 17 months) and honestly there was no other way she could have come out so I have accepted it. She is healthy and happy.

The post-CS recovery is harder no question, need to rest more and take it much easier to avoid putting too much pressure on the abdomen. But I was off pain meds in a week. Have family and partner help you as much as possible. For example I didn't give DD a bath for maybe 2 weeks but that was great time for DH and grandma to have time with her.

Best of luck, it will be fine once your baby is in your arms!

OP please don't panic, every birth is different - be they natural, assisted or CS. My first was a natural/assisted (ventouse) delivery and to be honest it was a horrendous experience. It did impact my bond with him (we are great now! It just took a while) and I still have the occasional nightmare about it. My second was a candle lit, classical music playing CS dream! Very, very little pain afterwards and we bonded fantastically well. Not being able to drive was a bummer but otherwise it was fantastic. I'm not having more but it would be CS all the way if I did. Good luck, all will be well!

I had a CS approx 14 hours ago.
i was admitted for an induction at 37 weeks due to DS being on the large side, however I apparently have a cervix which repels all hormones, I didn't dilate past one centimetre despite a cervical ripening balloon, and four hormonal pessaries. Therefore it was decided it would be safer to have a CS than send me home and wait for labour to start naturally.

I can honestly say that my section was amazing. It was calm, peaceful and completely relaxed.

I did feel a bit squiffy for approx five mins when my spinal started working due to my blood pressure dropping but the anaesthetist rectified it by giving me some fluids and an IV to bring it back up again, felt better after about five mins. And as I wasnt feeling great the surgeon paused his preparations to ensure I was ok before continuing on.

The actual surgery itself - I didn't feel any pain, just a slight sense of pressure, which was strange but not uncomfortable in my opinion.

We requested that DP tell me the sex of the baby, the surgeon told him when to look over the screen to see the baby's head and then body coming out, showed DP the genitals and DP told me I'd had a son.
It was magical.
Surgeon carried out delayed cord clamping as requested and DS was popped in a nappy (after weeing on the midwife) a hat and mits and placed on my chest for skin to skin, covered in a clean dry towel and stayed there for approx 35 mins while I was sutured.

I'm not having any issues with bonding with DS so far, admittedly he's only 14 hours old so it's still early days. I am struggling with breast feeding, but that's because my enormous boobs were smoothing him.
I have been supported all evening and night by the most amazing midwifery assistant who's taught me how to hand express, different positions to hold DS in whilst feeding and just generally been a hugely positive influence on my confidence in my ability to feed DS. And I'm pretty sure I'll crack it.

Recovery wise so far so good. Yes I can tell that I have had major surgery, but once my spinal wore off I have been encouraged to gently mobilise but am under very strict instructions to take it easy.
My pain is being managed well by tramadol and paracetamol, I was also given a dose if diclofenac up the bum after my CS whilst still in theatre. It was offered pre surgery and I didn't even notice it had been put in!

I hope your worries can be eased somewhat by our stories. I would have another elective CS in a heartbeat.

Sorry for typos and poor paragraph structure but I've got the most gorgeous baby sleeping on my chest and am typing one handed.

I've had both a cs and 'natural' birth (in quote marks as I was induced due to waters breaking and not going into labour, on constant monitoring due to high risk for infection, iv antibiotics, had epidural, ventouse and episiotomy). The elcs was AMAZING! The natural birth was ok for much of it (the end was not ok for me, although ds was fine) but the atmosphere in theatre for ds2's elcs birth was so happy and exciting with no pain (there was pain after but i took medication religiously and took it very easy for a month). I know it's not the same when it's your first and you are hoping for a natural birth - but the cs was honestly a much much better experience and so joyful. The team dropped the screen so we could see him be born. A bit gross for dh as he could see everything but still incredible. And ds2 breastfed easily for a long time.

I had an emergency CS and two V births. The CS was fine, I had an epidural ( I was having contractions as they did it and it was still ok) then it seemed in hardly any time I was holding my DD. Kissing and cuddling her while they sorted me out. Then into recovery where my mum was waiting. More cuddling and crying. Then I was moved into the ward. Cuddled her and slept on and off all day. It was a noisy ward but ok. The next day ( 24 hours later) I got up and had a shower. It was difficult initially but really not that bad. Just dont be rushed. Once I was home I took it slowly but I moved every day. Stayed in bed or laying on the sofa. We are so quick to think we need to be up and back to normal after having a baby in this society but I don't think we should.
Get lots of healthy nutritious food delivered and just enjoy being at home with your baby. I recovered really quickly and I'd already had a long labour before had. You'll be great.
My DD is now 12 and she is wonderful. My other V births were just as fine and I don't remember either of them bring better or more special. Having a baby is astounding no matter how they arrive.
I would say that all through pregnancy you worry about the birth part but once the baby has arrived and you are responsible for this whole new person you feel overwhelmed with love and the sheer magnitude of being responsible for them.

Just wanted to thank everyone for sharing their stories, it's making me feel much better about my ELCS.

OP, I hope these stories are helping you. I cried for a few days when I was told I needed an ELCS, and I felt like a failure but I can now see that the method of delivery is a means to having a healthy baby, which is what matters most.

Holly, I've had two c-sections and one pregnancy (second) with HG (not even that bad compared to some people). Compared to the HG, all I can say is that the c-section is a piece of piss and very brief. I say this as someone whose sections didn't even go "well" because I lost a lot of blood with both and had a transfusion. I am also a very medically anxious person.

My advice would be a) let the anaesthetist know if you are very anxious or have a propensity to low blood pressure, because they may need to give you more of the medication that keeps your blood pressure up, b) definitely let them know about the HG so they can give you anti-nausea meds. I was sick after the first but not the second.

It is a little surreal to hear them cutting you open but there will be NO pain and the mood in the room is quite buoyant and doctors relaxed (so not like other surgery). The baby will be out in 2-3 mins and most of the time is actually spent sewing you back up. But by that point you should be enjoying lots of lovely skin to skin. (I was able to do this during transfusion so definitely make sure they are planning on it.)

You will be in pain afterwards and getting out of bed was worse than I thought it would be. BUT you are not going to believe how good you feel once that awful nausea/ vertigo / sickness finally lifts. I would go easy on the eating (had terrible wind second time), but even a glass of orange juice or a biscuit is going to be an amazing thing after the last nine months. Six weeks on and I feel so happy, which I didn't at all during pregnancy.

Morning everyone, thanks for all your stories. They have really cheered me up.

A special thanks to the poster (something Honey I believe) who has just had her baby. Huge congrats! Thank you so much for giving me such an up to date story! I hope your recovery goes really smoothly.

Hopsalong, I am the same. Have hated every single moment of being pregnant (had a myriad of problems, big bleeds, mistaken diagnosis of GD, severe needle phobia) so was really looking forward to the new born bit which I would enjoy, finally and feel more in control of. All your stories have helped me see that hopefully I will still be able to.

I worry that it will affect my nct friends as well. Stupid, I know but if I'm the only one having a section I wont be able to join in the inevitable labour chat. But now I have had some time to get used to it, I can see it isnt the end of the world.

I so appreciate you all taking the time to respond, you really have helped me feel less scared.

My DC1 was breech and I had to have a planned section - it was such a calm and happy experience I chose to have two more. Breastfed each of them in the recovery room and for a year afterwards. And my scar was so small after no. 1 that the nurse doing my smear test asked why I'd had a laparoscopy.

In my next group, 5 out of 6 of us had sections , so you may not be the only one 😀 (although mine was the only elective). I'd say looking from the perspective of a few years down the line and 3CS, one under GA that as long as you are both safe and healthy that's what matters in the end.

NCT not next!

Hi OP. I completely understand your distress. I had an EMCS and then an elective for my second - it was a really positive, lovely birth.

A friend recommended this video to me and I found it reassuring and interesting - I hope you will too. I used a couple of the ideas in my birth plan and it helped make everything feel personal and special.

(And while I totally hear you on feeling like you're missing out on labour - a lot of women have told me if they could go back they'd do it this way. Some vaginal births are beautiful, others are traumatic and result in permanent injury. CS is no walk in the park but - in general- more predictable).

Good luck. m.youtube.com/watch?v=m5RIcaK98Yg

Another story: my SIL had an absolutely textbook first birth and was devastated to be told she needed a CS for DC2. Among other gems, her NCT teacher had told her she'd be unable to bend over enough to put a cup in the dishwasher for six weeks after a section. She says now that apart from the slightly longer recovery time for the CS delivery there was nothing to choose between them.

My (attempted) manual turn was awful, I'd never do it again.

SchnitzelVonKrumm I refused the ECV (turning) because it sounded awful to me. I looked up some research from John Radcliffe Hospital in Oxford and only 30% of women who had ECV successfully delivered naturally. Some because the baby didn't turn and some because even being turned there were other issues that prevented a natural birth. I decided if DD is breech there's a reason and I'm not going to force her. Turned out shape of my uterus and a few fibroids were the reason and an ECV would have failed anyway.

Much happier with the ELCS!

I have seen lots of Vaginal births as a doctor and had 2 CS myself first one Emcs after failed Induction second one by choice. To be blunt labour is very painful and I was pleased to have a c section second time round. It was calm and planned. My husband knew when to organise paternal leave. Immediately after the birth I had little one snuggles up to me, I breastfed and bonded perfectly with him. Actually I think cs is a good option . You will be fine

I agree with Olympicsrock about the calmness- it was actually great to rock up to hospital in the morning knowing I was scheduled in for say 9:30 and I'd have had the baby by 10:30! No long hours of labour before birth - I can't imagine how tired some women are who have say 50 hours of labour and then go straight into broken sleep with a newborn, I take my hat off to them. I was encouraged to start walking around the day after all 3 CS, and whilst it it sore for a few days I suppose you don't have added problems of tearing or stitches like in vaginal delivery. The biggest pain is not being able to drive for 6 weeks, especially if you have two older toddlers to deal with at the same time !

Thanks for the video, very informative. I will be speaking to my midwife today to get some more information as I am very torn about the manial turn now...

Has anyone got a different point of view on them? Or are they universally disliked as an option?

Holly, you don't know it will affect your NCT friends or that you'll be the only person have a CS. It can happen to anyone, something might change and one of them end up with an ELCS. Or something in labour and one might end up with an EMCS. You might not end up with a CS at all. So don't worry about that. And you'll still have a birth story to share, whatever that is.

Glad to hear you're feeling better this morning. Whatever happens, you of all people really deserve a smooth delivery x

Three DC, 2 born by ECS, one a natural delivery.

With my CS, I was home the following day, and actually found the recovery easier than from my difficult VB.

I was v anxious going in as it is a big op, but both times I was really well looked after, and unlike an emergency CS, they don't have to rush, so it feels v relaxed.

Ask about music, I was able to take in a playlist and have very fond memories of the whole experience.

Good luck x