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Original poster

OH at booking in apt?

30 replies

Mslg · 31/12/2015 18:18

Wasn't sure if it's standard procedure? He wants to come with me for moral support but would like advice on what others have done and whether there is much point in him being there (apart from the supportive aspect). I've heard it's quite long and boring?

OP posts:
sElizabeth · 31/12/2015 18:19

I personally went to mine without my OH because, as you say, it's pretty long and boring! Completely up to you though.

ginmakesitallok · 31/12/2015 18:19

No point in him being there IMHO. Is there a particular reason you need moral support?

Mermaid36 · 31/12/2015 18:21

It's just questions, a blood test and weight/height.....nothing even vaguely of interest for a DH I think.....didn't take mine, he would have sat there for 40 mins bored...

Champagneformyrealfriends · 31/12/2015 18:21

I went with my mum and only because they ask a lot about family health history and I've got a crap memory! My oh has come to scans but no midwife appointments. Xx

StopShoutingAtYourBrother · 31/12/2015 18:23

Yes to those involving scans or results, no to anything else. And take a book!!!

Original poster
Mslg · 31/12/2015 18:24

Last pregnancy ended in a miscarriage and I think he just wants to show his support and maybe feel involved.

OP posts:
KittyandTeal · 31/12/2015 18:27

My dh has always come to mine, he likes that kind of stuff strange it helps him feel involved early on. The midwives have been a bit Hmm though until they realise he's not there to answer for me (when they've told him to bigger off so they can do the domestic violence questions with me)

sundayraspberry · 31/12/2015 18:28

Prob different in different areas of the country but my OH came with me to both of my booking appointments. They asked fairly detailed medical and lifestyle history from him and his family history too, diabetes, heart problems etc. I think he liked coming and made it seem a little more real for him too. He had a few questions that he wanted to ask too.

Spilose · 31/12/2015 18:31

It's boring and long but they will also want to know some of your OH's medical history. I had mine there. Totally up to you both. If he wants to be there and there's no reason you don't want him there then I'd let him.

Paperblank · 31/12/2015 18:31

Flowers Sorry about your loss and I understand why he wants to be there with you.

DH didn't come to my booking in appt but has been to most of the others.

PeppasNanna · 31/12/2015 18:31

Your OH sounds lovely. It cant do any harm.

Exdp couldnt be bothered, didnt come to my 12 week scan even though i was told i had lost our previous baby at the 12 week scan...

Wishing you a happy & healthy pregnancy.

1frenchfoodie · 31/12/2015 18:33

I didn't take mine - just had him on phone standby for any family medical questions. Even less interesting than antenatal appointments with doppler so didn't see why he should also take time out.

WoodleyPixie · 31/12/2015 18:34

I'm not sure if it's still the same but they used to have questions about domestic violence which need skipping if partner with you. For this reason we used to ask you to come alone to the first appointment.

NotSpeaking · 31/12/2015 18:36

Never bothered with OH coming to the midwife appts. He came for scans though!

Mermaid36 · 31/12/2015 18:37

Yeah, I had a couple of questions asked about domestic violence/abuse and was also asked if I wanted to self-refer to social services...

sElizabeth · 31/12/2015 18:39

I completely forgot about the domestic violence questions. I misunderstood and responded 'No, I've been quite irritable but I would never hit him'. Oops...

seven201 · 01/01/2016 01:30

Mine took 1 1/2 hrs and was incredibly boring. I asked my husband (who asked his mum) for family medical history of his side before I went. I think I'd have felt a bit silly if I'd taken him along. If you want him there and he wants to go then there's no harm, unless he midwife disagrees!

icklekid · 01/01/2016 06:15

I think dh did come for dc1 but won't be for dc2 I don't think...it's fine if he wants to but if you know his family medical history should be fine without

RayFuckingPurchase · 01/01/2016 07:06

Leave him a list of jobs to do at home while you're gone - that's my kind of moral support!

My midwife once said they can get concerned if husbands/other halves turn up to all the routine appointments but I can see why the first one would be exciting for some dads to be. As I got further along I quite liked going alone - sometimes the stuff you discuss (piles, anyone?) is for a midwife's ears only!

chocomochi · 01/01/2016 07:11

Lovely your OH wants to go and entirely understand why he wants to. But perhaps he will want to save his annual leave for other scans/appointments.

Enjolrass · 01/01/2016 07:13

Dh came to my first one in my first pregnancy. But then I stopped driving due to the massive amount of vomiting.

I think he came to the first on the second pregnancy as well. Mainly for his family history. He came to scans and consultant but not routine appointments.

I wouldn't ask dh to take time off for my booking app, but if he wanted to be there I would be happy for him to go.

DimlowChips · 01/01/2016 08:50

Mine came along and it was a giggle! He couldn't make it to many of the others so wanted to support me on the first at least

wonkylegs · 01/01/2016 08:57

There's no reason why he can't. Mine took 2hrs (hospital/consultant in one trust, MW in other = double paperwork + I have a medical condition & complicated history) and DH would have had to take whole morning off work + as I am under consultant care I get lots of scans and appointments so he comes to my scans and not my appointments.

Philoslothy · 01/01/2016 13:56

My midwife once said they can get concerned if husbands/other halves turn up to all the routine appointments but I can see why the first one would be exciting for some dads to be

That is sad, my husband has always come to as many appointments as he can.

frikadela01 · 01/01/2016 16:20

I took OH to my booking in. He wanted to come so he could feel involved. He probably won't come to any more routine appointments other than the scans. He actually asked a lot of questions I hadn't thought of so he came in handy.