Pregnant at forty and over - thread 2

[cloudjumper]

To continue the support for those of us who are pregnant at forty and over.

I'm 35+3 Brooke so due 12th Jan. Starting to wonder if I'm birthing a baby elephant though!
Cloud baby is the next one we're waiting for. Less than 2 weeks to go Cloud?
One week from tomorrow I am finishing work. Sooooo ready.

Hello, ladies! I can't possibly catch up as ice been away for so long (previously known as flotilla). I hope you are all well. I am now on crutches and housebound except for taxi rides to hospital appointments. I can't tell you how seemingly life-changing this level of pain and disability has been this pregnancy. I'm sorry to parachute back in simply to moan, and I promise to try harder to keep up with the thread. I have just been in too much pain and too depressed to do anything at all.

I have no idea what I would do without my amazing husband, and its been a real journey of commitment and love despite the trials. Sorry, now I'm sounding deranged

I am 33+1 and still heading for a midwife-led unit birth. I feel more than ever the need for as un-medicalised a birth as possible after such a drug-fuelled and traumatic and painful pregnancy. I'm under no illusions, though how rubbish a birth can turn out - especially after my last one!

So....I need to be off dihydrocodeine by week 36 so baby isn't born sleepy/dependent. I am panicking already at the thought of the final four weeks of pregnancy without this powerful painkiller. Acupuncture is crushingly futile and so is the hydrotherapy. Whoever sang 'The Drugs Dont Work' was lying

Will try and read back a little....

Well, all was good at my growth scan yesterday. Baby weighs 4lb 13oz, so has put on 2lb in last 4 weeks, and the sonographer could see lots of hair (I pretended I could...!).

Ellie I'm on Metformin 500mg twice a day, but diet wise it's just a case of following a normal healthy diet - low sugar and not too many carbs. Not too restrictive although not looking forward to rationing the Xmas cake! My levels are stable and the good news is that my consultant said yesterday that from 35 weeks the pregnancy hormone that causes GD starts to reduce so as long as I don't have to start insulin by then I won't need to.

sticks head in
Girls please could I join you? Am 40, 1st pregnancy neurotic currently 9+4 thanks to IVF at ARGC. Was initially a twin pregnancy but lost 2nd hb at 8+4. Shitting bricks at the whole bloody thing to be honest.

Welcome cheapred . I think everyone worries, especially in the first trimester. I'm 42, I've had a failed IVF and 3 early mcs and now, after giving up and moving on from ttc, I'm 22 weeks with DC1! I didn't really accept that it was actually happening until more time had passed - I'm getting there now. I had early scans at 8 and 10 weeks to keep me sane!

Welcome back blooming. That sounds horrible. So sorry you are experiencing such pain. I don't know enough about pregnancy, but I hope it is pregnancy-related and will get better once you give birth.

Hurrah islaman! Nothing like a good scan

Here's my paranoid thought for today. Right now I'm sitting cross-legged on the couch with the laptop in front of me (the way I always sit). My belly really isn't that big yet and I don't really know how he's fitting in there - I couldn't be squashing him sitting like this could I?

Cheapred gm and welcome! I'm so glad u joined in. I was the only one in first trimester here and i'm glad i've found a buddy :) we are same gestation too! Congrats on this success through IVF. I am so glad u mentioned ARGC. One of my close friends is so damn scared of approaching them coz they are so intense..but probably that's why they has such good success rate! This would be my first (after previous 5 losses), how about you?

Blooming i'm fairly new so dont know ur story but sounds like u've had quite a lot to go through. Would they not wean u off codeine slowly to make sure u can tolerate without it? Can u still be on a minimal dose like 20 mg?? Sometimes some women have to have it during labour and if they've had it, Paediatricians need to be aware and they will have to give a counter medicine injection to the baby as soon as he/she is born and it reverses the effect very quickly most of the times. I'm sure you'd hv discussed all these options with your doctor. Wish u all the best x

Brook noooooo! U wont squeeze ur bub while sitting cross legged! He he ..if the scan and estimated weight of the baby is all good on ur 20 wk scan and if u've done it throughout ur pregnancy, it means u've not sqeezed him so far! ;) however, sitting cross legged is not advisable for long period, i know from theory point of view but surely for some time, i dont think it should be a huge problem! Some one more experienced than me (practically) will surely pop in to answer ur question...:)

Call for ladies who have not yet responded...pls could u respond to my query re Panorama vs Harmony? (Pls see above). I just need to get my head around it before i reach 10 weeks..thanks x

Ps: Isla great news! It would hv been annoying to have injections..but its very interesting..i think the consultant must hv been talking abt beta hcg but i didnt know placenta stops producing hcg by 35 weeks!

Hi cheapred & blooming and good news isla
ellie glad things have improved a bit.

Scan went well thanks - apart from the still shortish femur, everything seems to be tracking well and average which is great news - fingers crossed it keeps going that way.

Brook at 22 weeks I was getting popping and fizzing for want of a better way to describe it - anterior placenta is masking a lot I think. This last week though (so I'm 24 + 3) massive difference in what I can feel, much more definite but only low down below my placenta. But seeing him on the screen he was really moving a lot up there.

Aww, thank you for the sympathy, Brooke and Ellie, you're very kind. My pain is SPD and is located in the sacroiliac joints (arse) and the mons pubis, coupled with nasty red-hot poker stabbings up the centre of my vagina that literally make me scream. My vulval varicose veins are so horribly engorged and throbby that they now hang down and stick to my underwear when I seep the copious amounts of late-pregnancy discharge (I am sorry for the TMI and hope you're not snacking as you read this ) It really is burrowing into my confidence quite how disabling this pregnancy has become. I have a baby already here at home and my confidence around her is collapsing as I become more and more useless and depressed

Ellie, my consultant is brilliant and tells me not to treat the 36-week mark as 'D-Day' and panic; they will work with me to ensure I am not left to cope with agonising pain at the end of pregnancy. The reason I have to come off the dihydrocodeine completely is because I have been on the maximum dose now for months and baby will have developed a dependency. Of course codeine in random, infrequent doses is fine (as you correctly point out women are regularly given codeine during labour but it is not enough for it to be born dependent) but my system needs to be clear if my baby is not to be born agitated, teary and fitful sleep-wise.

Anyway...enough! I am thrilled to see that Brooke and Ellie are enjoying healthy progressing pregnancies! You must be overjoyed! Are you frightened still? I hope not; I hope you are being afforded some pockets of pleasure and hope after all you have suffered previously. Very brave ladies.

Hello to all the newbies and congratulations on your scan results, Stepford

Blooming, poor you. It sounds horrendous. Have they said that everything should go back to normal once the baby comes?
My worst symptom is not being able to sleep (hence the 3.30 messaging!). How will you manage through labour?
Great news re growth scan Isla.
Welcome & congratulations Cheapred. So sorry you lost your little twin. You are bound to be anxious & that feeling really doesn't go away - there is always something to worry about! It's worth it in the end though.
Glad your scan went well Notfrom. What does a short femur mean for your baby? Might the measurements still catch up?
Can't help with your question Ellie. I had the nhs DNA blood test, which I think is the harmony, because I was high risk for down's. That result was ok (by my standards - not to many I'm sure) but I have left it at that & will wait & see what happens.
I am having my eyebrows done tomorrow & a hair cut & colour on Monday. Desperately need to have a bit of pampering. One week of work to go...

Hello everyone. Been awol with work, as year end approaches and, pregnant or not, I've been stuck doing the crazy crazy hours. Only a few more bothersome weeks and then I'm dropping down to something like 9-5 and I cannot wait!

20 week scan next week, I just want it over with!

Nice to see some new people one this thread

Who is next to have their baby, is it cloud and then grizzer? How exciting! Hope everyone is keeping well. I had some champagne last night and then had the best night's sleep I've had all pregnancy, and feel so alive today. It has also shifted my terrible constipation (bloody typical, haha!!)

City that sounds like the best kind of sleeping pill. Might have to try that every night.

We (DH and I) have booked today and tomorrow up and I came downstairs this morning totally pleased with myself because I had a lie in! Last time I tried to have a lie in, I was up before 8.

I can't name tag or scroll back....
I have no experience with Harmony or the other one. I considered Harmony (offered nearby ) but the scan at 12 weeks said 1 in 10.000 so I though quite low.... hope someone else comes along to help
Cloud and grizzer almost there!!!!
Flotilla lovely to hear from you but I am sorry thins are so painful!!!! They seem to be looking after yu really well!
Hello newbies and everyone else!!!!

Hi, lovely Notso! I'm so happy you finally got pregnant and will be giving the beautiful Joseph a sibling (will you be finding out the sex?) How are the brows and hair? And how do you feel with only four more days at work?

Grizzer, I am told by the consultant that neither the SPD nor the vaginal varicose veins will be problematic during a natural birth However, I have been invited, along with my husband, to the birth unit whereby we can practice which birth positions I am physically able to adopt and which ought to be avoided. Happily, despite the SPD issues, I can still squat deeply and freely and open my legs wide

Good luck with the scan, Mole, will you be finding out the sex?

Nicky, how many weeks are you now?

Argh! The questions posed to Notsoold regarding brows, hair & final days left at work were meant for you, Grizzer

Hi all, and welcome newbies! I've been a bit awol last week (still reading posts) because my mum was visiting. Not sure why she suddenly decided to come, but hey ho. She is not an easy visitor, and I ended up being exhausted - I'm very envious of all those whose mothers are actually helpful. If anything, mine is anything but and creates more work. People are always surprised that I do not want her around when the baby arrives, but that would be my worst nightmare.

But she has left now, and I am desperately trying to relax for my last week before the the 'big day'. Still rushing around more than I'd like to, trying to sort stuff out etc. Sleep is getting very difficult, just can't get comfortable anymore. However, today in a week's time I will hopefully be holding my new baby!

Blooming I'm 17+1.

So exciting Cloud. Do you feel like it's gone quickly? I do, which I'm very happy about.
Sorry your mum's visit isn't helpful or relaxing. Mine is arriving on Thursday & will stay all over Christmas but I am very lucky - she is beyond fabulous & does everything!!
I am counting down the minutes until Friday Blooming. I still have a huge to do list but I think I might have to accept it's not all going to happen in the time I have left.
I am currently at the hospital waiting for my 36 week scan, followed by the consultant appt to discuss birth options. Hair & brows are all sorted so I am looking slightly better although the 4am wake ups are not helping my under eyes!

Baby has turned!! Head down & ready to go. I hadn't noticed any real change so it was a lovely surprise. I was also told I am no longer considered high risk & can see a midwife in 2 weeks. 36 weeks & I'm off the high risk list and I only have 2 and a half days of work to go [ all booked in for induction on the 11th Jan.
Possibly saw a little penis in scan too but I'm a bit hopeless with what's what so it could have been the cord... Or a leg... Or it's nose!!

That is great news grizzer! Now for the final stretch, not long to go! Do you think that there is a chance you might go into labour early? Not long now before you can at least put your feet up a little bit, those final days just draaaaggg... Although I then found it surprisingly difficult to leave on my last day, how weird is that.
I'm also wondering if I saw some little balls at my 34-week scan, but tbh, I can never tell anything on those images, other than the really obvious things like head, hand, foot etc.

Blooming That sounds awful, poor you! Are you getting any physio treatments for your SPD?

city When is your 20-week scan?! Good luck!

Hi notsoold! How are you? Hope everything is going well!

My hospital bag is now packed, all I need to do is to decide which baby clothes to take...ugh. And then remember to put my e-reader in there on Tuesday. Starting to get nervous now.
Off to a pampering session at my local beauty salon now - gotta be done

At our 12 week scan, the person doing the scanning showed us the screen to start off with, pointing out the head, the legs and the heartbeat, then she turned it away and did her measurements before giving us another look.

When we got out of the room, I asked DH if he'd seen the heartbeat as I hadn't and he hadn't either. Very observant, both of us

Morning all - can I play? I'm 41 (42 in Feb - Bah Humbug!) and 10 weeks today following 3 previous MCs over the last 3 years.

It's been a rocky road so far with bleeding and pain from 4 to 7 weeks, sky high anxiety, 2 scans where I was convinced MC would be confirmed, a big house move to a new area, another scan to confirm everything was OK before new GP would refer me to MW. Thankfully all looked well, with visible heartbeat (first time we've seen one of those!) and growth spot on.

Harmony blood test and scan booked for next Monday, but have yet to get a call from MW so not sure when 12 week scan will be...although at this rate I'll become the most scanned woman in history!

So good to read other people's experiences and find somewhere where I can hopefully share my terror experiences.

So exciting cloud and grizzer! I know I'm having a little boy - maybe you are too

city have you had you scan?

Welcome greater and congrats. I know how you must be feeling. I'm 42 and I've had 3 early mcs over the last 3 years. I'm now 22 + 4 weeks. I've had 5 scans so far! (all on the NHS which has been great) I was given early ones at 8 and 10 weeks and was completely expecting the worst, but believe me, all can be well after recurrent mc. I found this thread incredibly helpful (and reassuring) through the first trimester and beyond.

Aw, thanks brooke - it's very re-assuring to hear your story. So so hard to feel happy and positive when you've been through MC - it kind of takes the joy out of things. I feel positive for approximately half an hour after a scan and then start worrying again! Does the anxiety lessen? I always thought I'd really enjoy being pregnant and am hoping that stage comes along at some point.