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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Anyone else taken existing children to hospital during labour?

34 replies

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 16:56

Sounds odd, and it's early days yet, but we don't have anyone to look after our children when the time comes.

My close friend moved away last year, and neither myself or my husband have any family.

Can you take your children along to the hospital? Is there a waiting area or something available for them?

I don't want to get a sitter in or someone we don't know. Eldest is 13, also have a 5 year old. Don't want to leave them at home either.

I will be asking the midwife when I see her, but booking in appt not until 12 weeks, and I just want to know if anyone else has had the same problem?

Thank you x

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duckbilled · 23/07/2015 17:02

I am pretty sure that they wouldn't let you bring a young child. Who would be responsible for them while you are delivering?
I am in the same position of having no family or close friends nearby and i am trying to decide between finding a emergency nanny to stay with the children, or hiring a doula to be my birth partner.

lauraa4 · 23/07/2015 17:09

My stepmum went into labour earlier then expected and her and my dad had no option but to take my little brother to the hospital with them as there wasn't enough time to find someone immediately. The midwifes were great and actually looked after him in another room whilst she gave birth. However I think this was because they literally turned up on labour ward with no other option. Definitely speak to your midwife though, they must come across this type of thing fairly often.

Whatabout · 23/07/2015 17:09

Children are not allowed on to labour ward, they may be allowed in some sort of waiting room with your partner. Still would be better not to take them as you have no idea what will happen or how long it will take. I would always be happy to look after someone's child in an emergency like this and so would most people I think. Maybe look at a doula to support you during labour so husband can stay at home with older one or look at home birth?

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 17:11

Thanks for your replies. I was thinking about a home birth just to avoid any issues with who would look after who etc, but not too sure about a home birth. I will have a chat with the midwife about it.

Thanks x

OP posts:

mantlepiece · 23/07/2015 17:14

Have you considered a home birth?

I think if you have had straightforward labours previously that could be a great solution for you.

DirtyMugPolice · 23/07/2015 17:14

I was going to suggest a home birth. There's lots of perks of one and as it's your third it might help as you could have a quick labour! Especially if you deliver in the night means your children would hopefully sleep through it.

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 17:18

Anyone done a home birth before? Bit nervous about it. First labour 20 hours, heart beat dropped really low, came out blue needed resusitation. Otherwise ok. Second labour 8 hours, only issue was my SPD and the pain.

Any positive home birth stories would be lovely x

OP posts:

vvviola · 23/07/2015 17:18

What about the 13 year old's school friends? No matter how little I knew the parents I'd be happy to look after DC's friends in such a situation. Especially if pre-warned.

When we lived abroad one of our elderly neighbours (who we knew only to nod and smile to and talk in dreadful on my part French about the weather with) came over (with some English written on a piece a paper) to let us know that if I went into labour and we were stuck she would be happy to look after DD1 and/or sit in the house while DD1 slept.

You would be surprised how willing people can be in such situations.

DXBMermaid · 23/07/2015 17:22

Agree with asking a neighbour or the parents if your DC's friends. If you ask them sooner rather then later you have time to get to know them better.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 23/07/2015 17:26

I left my DH at home with our DS and went to hospital alone. Avoided the complications of having to find someone who would be prepared to drop everything at short notice to have DS as family hundreds of miles awy.

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 17:27

I agree, I would definitely step up for anyone, but we really don't know anyone. The neighbours down our road used to be much nicer, but most have moved on and it's mainly rented not very nice characters down here now. Would move if we could. We have one nice neighbour, but they have 2 (quite vicious!) dogs. Maybe she could come over here and watch them?

Good idea with DS, I don't know any of the parents, but I'm sure they would look after him for a little while if I pre-warn them! We have a contact list from the school. Just need to workout what to do with DD.

Thanks x

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Floggingmolly · 23/07/2015 17:29

The midwives won't have time to look after your other children!
Most labour wards are stretched to the limit. Put some other plans in place while you still have time; otherwise your DH will have to look after them instead of being with you.
It's that simple.

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 17:30

amothersplaceisinthewrong how did you manage on your own? Was it ok?

Both times I was left for very long periods of time without the midwives, and I couldn't have coped without my husband there. My labours are evil, like induction style. I never get the build up of contractions. They start 1-2 minutes apart immediately, and then one after the other the entire time until time to push. No respite. Not sure I could do that alone x

OP posts:

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 23/07/2015 17:36

Well you might have to do it without your husband. Maybe it's not ideal but if you can't have a home birth you need someone to look after the kids

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 17:38

sharonthewaspandthewineywall, yep, sounds like they're the options. I'll be looking at home birthing for this one I think x

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mantlepiece · 23/07/2015 17:39

Yes I had a home birth for my 4th, was great! Very calm and easy.
The main thing if you are going to have one is that you feel positive about it.

If you have an NCT group in your area they will probably be the place that can advise and support you in that choice. Even just with info like the names of midwives who are experienced and supportive.

You need to gather the information so you can make the best choice for you and your circumstances. Everyone is different!

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 17:41

Thanks mantlepiece, good to hear you had a great home birth! I will be doing lots of research. Thanks for the advice x

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HeffaLumpers · 23/07/2015 17:47

My nearly two year old dd came with us to labour ward and was there when ds was born. It wasn't planned though, I was supposed to be having a home birth. I was 34 weeks and didn't think I was in labour when I went to the hospital and because I have quick labours there wé didn't have anyone we could get there in time to take her. I assumed dh and dd would be sent away but the lovely midwife was happy for them to stay, she thought I would be more stressed out if they were sent away.

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 17:50

That's very sweet HeffaLumpers, yep, I'd be more stressed if they were sent away x

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mrsdavidbowie · 23/07/2015 17:53

I did it alone .h stayed with dd.
Got a taxi at 5am.

No problem.

Bin85 · 23/07/2015 17:59

I would try and make 2 or 3 friends maybe from the parents of your children's friends.

Twodogsandahooch · 23/07/2015 18:06

Even with a HB you'd need a plan B in case there were complications and you were transferred.

Good luck

Bellabutterfly2014 · 23/07/2015 19:10

Hi CarrieLouise - my friend was in this situation and she started using a childminder from early pregnancy to get her son used to the lady so by the time her baby girl came he was fine with that. Bonus for you too - make the most of some nice meals out - date nights before baby comes!!!
I'd try to make friends with your kids friends parents, have a bbq and invite them round people will be surprisingly kind I think you'll be surprised.

Original poster

CarrieLouise25 · 23/07/2015 19:41

Great ideas Bellabutterfly2014, thank you x

OP posts:

Yukky · 23/07/2015 19:53

2 home births here (in the pool too). Dd1 slept peacefully upstairs for the whole of dd2's birth. Would highly recommend.

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