Most annoying things people say to you when you are pregnant?

[AlpacaYourThings]

I'm 16+3 and still have chronic nausea and sickness.

If one more person says to me, "Oh, I thought it stopped after 12 weeks" or "You'll be fine by X weeks" I don't think I can be held responsible for the hormonal rage that will ensue.

ender I didn't "go on" about either pregnancy, but I still got people making stupid comments and asking stupid questions.

Did my best to smile and nod, but sometimes it really got too much.

YY, grrr at 'magic' - all my most magical times involve trapped wind so painful I weep and vomit...

Anyone who says anything vaguely 'mystic' to me gets death stares:

"Oh, your body will tell you what is healthy" with regards to pregnancy food choices (My body wants gin and fags - my brain hasn't yet turned into so much of a nappy mush that I can't fathom that isn't the best idea...)

or

"It'll all come naturally once the baby's here"

This idea that once you become pregnant you get a direct line into the mystical life force of mother nature, and are imbued with deep natural knowledge - therefore meaning any woman who dare admit she's having a shit time, or doesn't know the right thing to do is implicitly 'unnatural'. Blugh.

(mothers, feel free to tell me if I'm talking out of my bum and I'm to expect this magical connection to the female life force sometime soon - otherwise, I remain doubtful...)

A lot of comments are just brought by people SEEING I am pregnant! Last week at work, a colleague I have very minimal contact with saw me, asked how far along I am (25w), looked me up and down and said 'oh'. Clearly, I somehow am either larger than she expected, smaller or somehow or other not quite what/how she expected. I am of course sorry to disappoint her.

In early pg, another colleague blamed a work-related moan on my hormones, which totally did annoy me as she would have been just as cross as me had she been in my situation (at work). Then, hours later after incident was forgotten she tried to make amends for her idiotic hormone comment by saying she had actually just meant she was worried about my blood pressure! FFS! This is someone who herself had a baby 18 months previously. Yes, that comment will really soothe me, and now I'm not at all cross again!

I had bad nausea along with some sickness up until 15/16 weeks.. And my mum and partner were the only people that really understood as they were seeing me more often than other people. I'm sure a lot of people have commented with the same thing, but when people say "oh have you tried ginger biscuits?" Without trying to be too snappy with people (it was very hard) I had to politely say "yes I've heard that" or "yes unfortunately that hasn't worked." Little do they know id also tried a list of a thousand other things that also didn't work. It was very frustrating! Now, at 23+6, along with other annoying things my main one is "Have you started getting the nursery ready yet?" (Because we haven't due to not having a spare room until we move!) and "oh wow you're not even showing!" Yes I'm aware of that! (Because I haven't got a big bump) x

Some of the ones I remember from my twin pregnancy:

"Are they natural?"
"Did you have IVF?"
"OMG, twins, I'd kill myself"
"Are you sure you're having twins, you don't look like you are"
"One of each, aren't you a clever girl?"

The best came a few months after they were born though, when a complete stranger poked her head into my (admittedly gorgeous) son's pram and exclaimed "oh, his dad must be gorgeous!" I'm obviously not attractive enough to have a good looking son

I'm also now repeatedly told by complete strangers - "one of each, no need to have any more now". Because the only reason to ever have another child would be to complete a set.

All of the above and the

"you know you don't have to have a c'section just because you've had them before, the doctors want you to have one because of figures. You can say no, its your right you know"

Yes I bloody well do know that, you have no clue why i had two c'sections or why I will be having a third, now fuck off.

I've got three weeks to go and everyone keeps asking me if I'm nervous- of course I am, I'm about to be sliced open and I want my baby to be okay!!!

Early on it was the "was it planned?" question a lot, followed by "were you trying for a while?" or even more baffling: "you had been trying for ages hadn't you!" Both really rude things to say!! and the "trying for ages" thing purely based on the fact that I was nearing 40 and had been married nearly two years!!! Everyone would have been far happier had I come back from honeymoon and announced a pregnancy...

And to those suggesting that we invite these comments by moaning about being pregnant in the first place- not true!! I've kept my pregnancy talk to an absolute minimum and only responded when asked about it (and generally said things are fine when really I have had terrible sickness and then chronic diarrhoea for the last 3 months...)

'Lucky it's just in the morning' - that one started to wear thin at week 27 with hyperemesis.

I really hate it when people refer to the foetuses 'gender' when they mean 'sex', but I haven't been brave enough to pull anyone up on it IRL!

*feotus's

LOL MatildaV at "One of each, aren't you a clever girl?" did they pat you on the head too??

Love the idea of pregnancy being a magical time. I described it to a friend as being a bit like having a long term syndrome type illness that you've chosen to have, whilst being told you are perfectly healthy and knowing that there is an end in sight. Any and every symptom is caused by pregnancy, considered quite normal and you can't do much about it.

'Are you still here?' (As though labour would transport one to Mars)

I'm so glad I'm not the only one not finding pregnancy to be a magical time. There's such a preconception that you should just be glowing with happiness, I think a lot of women find it hard to admit that they don't feel like that, for fear of backlash!

I also really resent the statement that we invite all these stupid comments by 'going on' about pregnancy. I hate the attention that being pregnant gets me, hate comments or stares at my bump, and certainly do not invite such attention. It's as though people think that general rules about politeness just do not apply when somebody is pregnant.

Grrrr.

I've had "are you still here?" Just answered, "looks like it!"

One of my wage slips went missing. Discovered it in managers office.

To my amusement, was told that they sometimes put pay slips there for those who on mat leave

I was only off for two weeks!! Found it hilarious though!

Also people commenting how good my skin is. Which is covered in more spots than I ever had as a teenager. And I've huge dark circles under my eyes most of the time!

good grief.

You lot ARE all hormonal if you get so riled up about people expressing concern/interest in your pregnancy, sometimes a bit clumsily. As for the woman who objects to her mum saying "You look pale" .... !!!

Thank you so much for your valuable input shonarose

Are you hoping for a boy or a girl?

I've had 2 losses in 6 months ffs, do you think it really matters?! Grrr

On the phone telling my mum 'I've got some exciting news! We're having another baby!' ~pause~ 'Are you happy about it?' 'Ummm, yes?' Why the fuck would I preface unhappy news with the word exciting??? And if I wasn't happy about it, I'd be dealing with it in another manner and not sharing the news at all!!!

"I don't approve of medication in pregnancy. It can cause miscarriage. Why not see if there's a herbal version?" One I had from a lentil weaving twat ignoramus someone.

1. I didn't care what they believed. I'd read/contacted the BEST high risk pregnancy clinic the NHS has. I trusted them more.
2. The fucking medication was injected into my leg daily to fucking well stop me miscarrying like had happened to all my other pregnancies. Which you KNEW you fucking idiot so could only be saying it to wind me up.
3. An untested herbal version. Because the thing is, I'm slightly lentil weavy myself at time... herbal medicine works BECAUSE it has an effect on the body. Herbal doesn't just mean safe for pregnancy.

OH, and of course aaaaalllllll the utterly scare mongery read-it-in-the-daily-mail "are you sure you can eat/do that?".
I'm a recurrent miscarrier with medical anxiety. Trust me if I did it when pregnant it's safe.
Many of these comments were from unmarried men at work 'mansplaining' pregnancy to me. Making them even more infuriating.

Tranquility FWIW I have had many losses and while I wasn't desperate, had a 'boy' hunch. It isn't a given that we're all saintly and don't have preferences after recurrent miscarriage - who knows, the person who asked that could have asked it because I'd had my "why don't people talk to me like I'm normal and ask is it a boy or girl?!?" rants at them.

I was very fed up of being painted as the saintly survivor (and expected to love morning sickness because 'at least you know you're still pregnant').

I got a girl. She's brilliant if I do say so myself!

shonarose I can honestly say I'm not hormonal at all. My DCs are 14 and 11, and I never even get PMT.

But I got the ridiculous comments, and they aren't all concern or interest, and in some cases a few people were positively relishing telling me all manner of doom and gloom things.

I also hated people trying to tell me what to eat/not eat when they hadn't actually bothered to read up on it and they'd come out with the most idiotic ideas, getting really offended when I declined their advice in choosing my food.

People really do need to think, sometimes.

a complete stranger poked her head into my (admittedly gorgeous) son's pram and exclaimed "oh, his dad must be gorgeous!" I'm obviously not attractive enough to have a good looking son

I got "Oh she looks like her dad" from a midwife when she saw her face for the first time.
As in... the rest of her was still in my fanjo.

Red, disgruntled with a shock of black hair... about right.

People telling you you'll have a total personality transplant after becoming a mother and do the opposite of whatever you think you'll do now.

YES YES YES.
Eg 'when baby arrives you won't care about make up and perfume any more, you'll go without.' because good mothers aren't slappers like you dear subtext from that particular person.
Trust me, after 3 1/2 months breastfeeding and waking each night to deal with poop you do NOT want to see me without a face full of slap. I'd get chucked out of play group for scaring the other babies.

Newly announced being pregnant and I am already sick to death of "how are you feeling?"; "Make sure you take it easy, got to look after that bubba!" The second one being said to me after a whole day of sitting on the sofa doing nothing but stuffing my face with Christmas food and the day before having stayed in bed til 1pm... . I am lucky enough not to be suffering with morning sickness, but it is so annoying everyone asking me if I feel sick! No I fecking don't feel sick, yes I am definitely pregnant, leave me alone!

Hormones :)