Hyperemesis Support

[LucindaE]

I hope everyone suffering from the Horrors of Hyperemesis will find this thread useful as a source of support and information.

There's no TMI on here - can't be by definition - and nobody should feel ashamed of moaning as much as they feel the need to.

MOH's wonderful website is full of useful information on this illness:
sites.google.com/site/pregnancysicknesssos/
Another invaluable website is:
www.pregnancysicknesssupport.org.uk/
If you need help in obtaining medication, this phone number is
brilliant:
024 7638 2020

Lastly, the NICE guidelines on treatment are useful:
cks.nice.org.uk/nauseavomiting-in-pregnancy#!prescribinginfosub

I would like to thank Everyone who has given such invaluable support and advice on this and on previous threads.

Remember when you are at your worst, 'This Too Shall Pass'. It really will.
So many women on this thread have thought they couldn't get through this, but they did.

Kali counselling sounds like a great idea. I think we underestimate the psychological impact HG has.

I had been feeling so guilty and worried about work until DH pointed out the other day that the worst case scenario has nothing to do with work. The worst case scenario is that I damage myself or the baby in some way by not resting enough and making myself ill. The midwife is already making noises about struggling to breast feed if not enough fat stores so that is what I should be focussing on.

It's just so hard when we're brought up being told we can do anything so societal pressure to be superwoman is ingrained. Accepting that actually I can't do it all right now without feeling like a failure is very difficult.

I feel like I'm being a crap wife, daughter, friend, sister, employee and everything at the moment. My mum's view was 'you're ill, you can't help it' and that people understand. It's just a very alien place to be.

Oklahoma I totally understand that.I havent worked or been been able to do much except rest and grow a baby the whole pregnancy and have felt pretty rubbish about that and that I haven't had much to give my partner/been very needy but as you say looking after ourselves and baby is what's most important at this time.

Okla your DH is right- DD1 was born at 36+3 Weeks due to severe pre-eclampsia, (unrelated to my horrible HG pregnancy). I had tried to struggle on as much as I could throughout the pregnancy and it was simply not worth it. Cutting a long story short DD was a very low birthweight for gestation and I was not in a very good state either (although much better than I had been with HG). Had huge struggles with bf and also mild PND (attached to guilt and also I think a delayed reaction to HG). Please please don't feel guilty, you need to look after yourself xxx

okla yeah. the pressure is just plain unrealistic. The NL has a much more human-centred view and it's very freeing.

So honestly, remember that you are doing really well with a horrible, horrible disease that will have a good ending, but looking after yourself and the baby is the no 1 priority. you can't do it all!

Hi all, still in hosp, still on drip. Ketones were still 3 this morning but they put the steroids up today and I've managed to eat and drink and not be sick so that's encouraging. On the down side, they've given me an enema three days in a row now and none of them have worked! So I think they may have to stop the ondansetron at least briefly. Nightmare. Will be here till Monday at least.

kali, and sorry I can't do more! I'm glad the steroids are helping, but not entirely sure what to suggest about the enemas,

Hope you're feeling a little better though with being able to eat and drink something. Hope DH has been able to visit too.

Hi kali good news about the steroids- so glad you have been a little better today. Sorry about the enemas! Is this a common side effect with ondansetron then?? I can't remember!!

ye ondansetron is great gut-glue. kali what do the medics actually say? the other thing that occurs to me is that with the amount you're eating, have you actually got anything in your system to come out the other end ... could your guts be empty?

Hi can I join this thread please? I'm 17 weeks tomorrow, due 21st December and the sickness is really getting me down. I was in hospital this week from Mon til Wed on a drip and IV anti emetics, luckily they got rid of my ketones and I was discharged but I'm struggling again to keep anything down, even on cyclizine.

I feel bad posting on my lovely pregnant after MC ante natal thread at the moment as I feel so ill I have nothing very positive to say and I don't want to bring everyone down!

Thanks all. Am def not empty, in fact so clogged up I am in a lot of pain with it. I was eating ok on the steroids for about a week before I lost control on Tuesday. The docs don't really know what to do apart from keep pumping me with all known laxatives and wait for something to work. They have already reduced the ondansetron but it hasn't helped yet.

It is a known effect Elizabeth but my predicament seems to be quite extreme! They have considered giving me bowel prep stuff but you have to be able to drink a lot of fluid quickly for that - without chucking it up obviously.

Oh yes forgot to say they did mention tube feeding today for the first time but hopefully my eating today has dodged that one at least.

basgetti welcome, you can find a home here, there's no such thing as TMI and we all understand what you're going through!

kali tomorrow must be the day, 24 hours into less vomiting + constant fluid intake must make it more likely

Welcome basgeti! Sorry I missed your post yesterday. It sounds like you should be on more than cyclizine maybe? Have you discussed that at all?

So they're taking me off the ondansetron for the day, trying just steroids and cyclizine to see if I can manage and to try to sort out my insides. Bit scary!

Kali I never know what to say. It sounds horrific. You have my wholehearted sympathy. Where in the UK are you? Is there anything any of us could do to help?

Basgetti hi. Welcome but sorry you're being so sick. Sounds like you have meds and understand ketones so not much we can suggest to help other than offering sympathy and a place for you to rant.

I had a big fight with DH yesterday. We were looking at baby things (we've finally started) and he eventually was just like 'you don't seem remotely interested in any of this please could you at least try and show some interest. I don't want our daughter being born and having to live in what looks like a dumping ground room'.

He's totally right, but I don't know how to get excited. Everything is so expensive and I have no idea what to get and am a bit paralysed by choice / indecision. Plus I'm still finding it very hard to get excited because of the sickness.

Sorry I've been super moaney on the thread this week. Everything is just really getting to me at the moment.

Oklahoma don't apologise for being 'super moaney' - you really haven't been! This crappy hg gets all of us down by going on and on and on... for months on end. I'm surprised more of us don't just go stark, staring mad. I do empathise with feeling paralysed when faced with starting to prepare for your daughter's arrival. It seems like just one step too far when you are trying to cope hour by hour, or day by day.

I don't know if this will help, but in the end I emailed a couple of good friends who had recently-ish had children and asked what they thought were the most useful and important things they bought. They were completely fantastic and I pooled the lists/comments and put them into a spread-sheet and slowly starting looking at ebay, amazon and other sites to buy a few things, one at a time. It was great to take my mind off feeling so crap and whenever it became too overwhelming (quite often, especially at first), I just stopped, and then started again when I felt able to. That's how we got all of our things. Plus, there are sales on now - hurray!

We absolutely didn't have huge amounts of money to spend, and by taking one thing at a time, I was able to get good prices for each of them. We even had enough left to get one of the nursery walls wall-papered!

kali I am really hoping you get some relief today!!

okla give yourself a break, it's totally normal to be feeling like you do. It's probably also normal for your DH to get a bit frustrated too, it's been a tough few months for both of you! starrys advice sounds good for starting to get things ready. It might also help to prioritise the things you/DH think you will need right away. So if it's important to DH that the room is clear, can that be done first? Set goals, simple things that can be completed each day/week- perhaps completed by DH but with you watching appreciatively or you doing the online research, DH going to the shop etc...

Kali good luck today, we're all behind you.

waving at everyone. Sorry have only some read as she has decided that it's a great idea to stay awake all day so I don't get my daytime sleep! Although she slept for six hours last night :) Lordy am tired.

So two very quick things. okla the last thing to worry about is having enough fat to breastfeed. If it's easier to go formula then that's a perfectly nutritious alternative to breastfeeding. Chances are all will be fine but do not feel under pressure to do anything you don't want. If for some random reason bf does not work for you because of hg then go for the bottle. And make sure your DH is primed to be very forceful on your behalf if the midwives get shitty. Do not tolerate it. You are exhausted from birth, exhausted from hg and don't let anything stress you out.

If bf is a struggle just use a bottle and then try again - friend had this advice from a Mw in Sweden and it worked fine. Far less hysteria and actually is good to mix the two as the baby gets used to taking a bottle without the faff of expressing.

Just had a story from a friend who gave birth in a different hospital to me in the Netherlands and with a fever after c section and had no milk and was in agony. The midwife was virtually punching her breasts whist she and the baby were in floods and her husband practically roared at the midwife to get out and get a bottle. I was but shows that's why we need our men. Particularly when faced with women like this. I had one too and dh told her off. was over something else though.

I ramble when tired sorry! My other question is to the mums after pregnancy. I cannot get back into food. I really struggle to think about what to eat. I know I still have strange things as all I wanted for 3 days was ice cream and chocolate sauce - I didn't eat anything else, I couldn't stomach it and a salad even nearly came back. And normally if I have ice cream I don't like vanilla! I don't have a bug and I know I get tired and then don't feel so hungry but this is quite extreme for me. I feel helpless in the supermarket nothing looks nice to eat. I'm going to follow slimming world once I get home as that will give me healthy ideas but I am finding it very hard right now. Has anyone experienced this? I guess it's still hormonal? Or psychological after nine months of avoiding food?

kali feel better soon. Virtual, non puke inducing hugs to everyone else.

Okla you sound totally normal. I really agree about bf, it's the last thing you should stress about now. I had a list for baby stuff too and ordered it all on line bar the pram. Completely empathise with the lack of excitement. Have you got a counsellor? I found some counselling both before and after birth was v helpful. I had one session with DH too. Worth considering? Also maybe see a dietician? Food supplements like ensure might help you get more vits and cals on board without forcing yourself too much.

Living - I had probs with nausea, food aversions and even occasional vomiting for months and months after birth. Actually I remember weaning myself back on to some things like fruit while weaning DS! I think for me it was both hormonal and psychological because the final improvement came when I completely stopped bf but lack of confidence in eating and not vomiting was a big factor too. I saw a psychologist at the children's centre who helped a bit with the food issues too. I found getting back into cooking, which I love and couldn't do at all during pregnancy, was a big help. Esp eg new recipes with no associations or memories.

Tiny bit of progress with bowels! Nothing amazing but I'm delighted about anything at this point, I am so uncomfortable. also managed a shower. Thought best to do everything this morning before I start really feeling the lack of ondansetron.

I am in north London, at the Royal Free.

hi basgetti and congratulations on your pregnancy :)

Can you get stronger than cyclizine from your doctor? there is NO reason not to, btw. Look at some of the links that Mother Hen popped up on the top, they give good, complete informatoin. The meds recommended are safe in pregnancy and recommended by the Government's own good practise body, the NICE. Better meds really do help most people a great deal. And do post here whenever you need to! :)

okla i've nver heard of anyone not being able to BF because of the HG. Are you sure the MW wasn't just trying to pressure you?

About not looking forward to teh baby - that's completely normal for people with HG. When life is a misery, it's extremely hard to be enthusiastic. People who haven't been through it don't understand.

On this matter, I'm certain of what I say. In the meltdown 16 days before the birth, I was completely rejecting the baby and they called in first a psychologist and then a psychiatrist. Both said that the loss of all feeling and all love (at that stage) for the baby was due to my whole system, physical and mental, being under too much strain and that normal feelings would come back when the preg was over and that enthusiasm and bonding would be normal. Apparently it's completely expected for people in our situatoin or who have had exceptionally unpleasant pregs for one reason or another.

hey living :) I found that I ate and ate and ate but that things didnt taste quite normal for some time. Some of them still don't, but it's still WAY WAY better than in the HG. Hard to describe. It's like I don't feel hungry sometimes but put food in front of me and it disappears so so fast. Other times I'm starving. it's def not normal eating patterns for me, though well, again, way better than in the preg. Also I feel faintly nauseous quite often when tired especially and when bfíng.

waves at starry and Kali and everyone

Hi all-
Welcome to the thread basgetti - sorry you find yourself here, hg can be a relentless slog! We have all been there so know exactly how it feels. You will definitely find lots of support and advice here though! It can be a vicious circle of being re-hydrated with Iv fluids, feeling a little better and then getting worse again. Sounds like you need something more than cyclizine as it is obviously not effective for you at the moment. I would urge you to go back to the GP ASAP as you don't want to get admitted straight back in again.

kali glad there has been a bit of 'progress', hope the reduced dosage of ondansetron is manageable for you. Glad you have avoided tube feeding thus far. Thinking of you xxxx

okla I was never enthused at all about getting organised with baby stuff while feeling so ill- completely normal- you would not be be expected to start redecorating your house for example in the throws of any other chronic and debilitating illness so again please don't be hard on yourself. Also didn't mean to imply that I had difficulties with bf due to hg - completely unrelated and your midwife should have enough sense and experience of bf not to suggest this to you (she is obviously not well versed in hg ;) )

living there are still a few foods that I will probably never want to touch again as they remind me too much of hg. The nausea did ease off for me fairly quickly I admit although I think the aversions stayed for longer. I guess the palate maybe is altered for a bit due to hg??

Waves to everyone xx

Just sticking my head back into the new thread - hi guys! Sad to see so many familliar faces still here and struggling, but hoping that things continue to improve.

Wanted to give some of you hope, that I've pretty much weaned myself off the Stemetil in the last 3 weeks or so, and that at 18 weeks I only need to take one tablet if I know I have a long/busy day ahead of me - tiredness definitely makes it worse. Still get nausea first thing, and still have days where I have a quick bile run at some point, so it's still there, but manageable for now.

Still can't stand margarine! And my Due Date is now actually the 13th Dec :)

Good luck ladies!

Am off the ondansetron, vomiting every hour. Collapsed trying to get to loo this morning. Have to stay off the ondansetron till they sort out my bowels at least. They're putting the steroids up again and giving it by injection so I can't lose it. Consultant is going to consult palliative care team in case they have any bright ideas!! Should be seeing specialist dietician team too. Not a great situation really.

Oh kali that all sounds so frightening. have you got family sitting with you?

oh kali honestly don't know what to say or suggest. Really hoping that there is something that one of the other specialist teams can suggest as it seems that they are exhausting all the standard methods of treatment for you. Sometimes 'thinking outside of the box' helps- lets hope. Thinking of you xxx

sasseh great to see you on the new thread. Glad that you are finding symptoms more manageable now. I will update the list!