IVF Graduates - A place for pregnancy menkulling

[BeetlingAbout]

A chat thread for those who have conceived via assisted conception.

Come and join me egg buddies!

Time that sounds really positive, so glad to hear things are well under control and that your medical team are happy with how things are progressing. I think you will need this time off work to do a whole load of online shopping so you are ready for little Time's potential early arrival!

Welcome Thoughtful. We're all at different stages here, although there are a bunch of us who had successful IVF rounds within a few weeks in January/Feb so it may just seem that everyone is further ahead. You're right that once a heartbeat is seen, the chances of everything being ok are really high...but I don't think that stopped any one of us feeling terrified at the time. It is an incredibly nerve wracking time, and the days/weeks go by so slowly, but they do pass and before you know it it will be 12 week scan time.

Welcome thoughtful we're a real mix of stages on this thread.

You're right- seeing a heartbeat is a really positive indicator. The odds have to go in favour of us IVFers at some time, right?

Time that does sound positive. I've been doing lots of research on premmie births and it's more encouraging than I expected. A friend is a neonates paediatrician and this was what her husband sent me about her reaction to premmies when I was panicking:

24 weeker - major panic
25 - minor panic
26 - a bit perturbed
27 - bit busy with it
28 - it needs tlc
29 - keep an eye
30 - woteva

I hope that is reassuring!

I like those technical terms euro

Nice to see you here thoughtful. Congratulations

I hope you find a plausible no alcohol excuse and have a fun weekend.

Thanks euro, that is reassuring. The consultant the other day said that from 32 weeks you can probably think about taking them home pretty soon. They just like to make sure you are feeding well as the baby has very little body fat. For full term babies they don't worry so much as the bub can cope with a few days of poor feeding, but premmies can't.

On oneborn the other day they had twins born at 30 weeks, but one was as small as a 24 weeker. But she seemed fine when they showed her 9 months later. I think my baby weighs more now already then that little one did, which is a great.

Welcome thoughtful. I find the best no alcohol excuse is just to pretend to drink. Bring the glass to your lips a few times and don't take any (or a teeny amount). No-one really notices, then abandon it somewhere and move to 'vodka' and coke, or 'gin' and tonic. You can get the bartender onside to help - I had one making me lime and water in a wine glass which no-one questioned.

Ha time I tried your last suggestion at about 8 wks and asked for a soda water with ice and lime; the barmaid looked confused and pulled out a 3l bottle of mineral water from under the bar and shouted "is this what you wanted?"... Argh!!

Hi everybody. Sorry I have been so absent from this thread for a while. Everybody around me, including two of my best friends and sister-in-law have had babies in the last fortnight and I've been having some worries over my son's nursery care, so have been busy. I feel so grateful every day that my IVF worked, though. Two other members of the English Department in the school where I work are also pregnant and I think I would struggle to be around them enormously if I wasn't growing a bump myself. Am 25 weeks now and still can't quite believe it!

First of all, so sorry that some of you are still having such an anxious time. Time - sounds like you are coping well with the bed rest despite this. You are amazing! I am super impressed with all of you who are busy knitting and making things as well. I am useless at anything like that but my mother-in-law in Australia is a really prolific knitter, thankfully!

Euro - so sorry that your placenta isn't behaving as well as it should. Also sorry to hear that you are so anxious about having a Section. I'm still fighting to try for a VBAC this time, but if I do end up with a section, I know it will be okay. I have several friends who have had elective C sections and it has been a really positive experience for them - honestly! My friends have tried to persuade me more than the doctors that this is the route to take. If I didn't have a heavy toddler and if I wasn't secretly hoping for a third child from our frozen embies, I would go down the C section route. The main thing about it is that you feel kind of disabled for a few weeks afterwards and (although I live in Central London and don't drive) you can be terrible inconvenienced by this. But remember that if you go for a natural birth you still have about a 30% chance of having an emergency section, which is worse because you are usually knackered and have been in a lot of pain before you get to that stage. Your ladybits are also left looking magnificent after a Section as well, of course! Whatever happens though, after the birth, you will be so delighted to see him/her, that it really won't matter how he or she arrived though. I know what you mean about wanting a natural birth after such a medicalised conception. That's exactly how I feel, but at the end of the day, the birth is just a few hours out of years and years with your child and it's what you do after the birth which really matters. Hope this doesn't sound 'preachy' - when you are pregnant, so much is made of the birth, but it's what happens afterwards which really matters.

Thoughtful - congratulations!! Wonderful to see you here! I am a fellow tubeless lady after 2 ectopics and tube removals, if you remember me. So far my pregnancy had been amazingly straightforward and I feel extremely well. Hoping to will have the same experience.

Val - so glad your scan went well, missis! The first few weeks of pregnancy are awful, aren't they? Am delighted for you.

Res - been thinking of you lots and hope you are doing okay. Xx

Everybody else - apologies for the lack of personals but hope you are a feeling well and having great Mondays so far! Xxx

Bad you sound like you are doing really well.

You are right of course about the birth being just one day. Before the "bad scan" I was seeing it very much like that, but now I am down the medicalised route and have heard so many horror stories about my local hospital, I am finding it difficult to shift my mental focus past the birth. I am slowly processing it though. I just need time to get my head around it all.

On the drinking front, I've had lime and soda quite a few times. Cranberry and soda also works (and could pass as a vodka cranberry).

I have my next monitoring scan in a couple of hours. Hopefully the blood flow hasn't got any worse yet. Centime has been very active over the weekend and seemed to be dancing away when we had the 80s cheese blaring in the car yesterday. :)

Thanks for the welcome everyone. I survived the hen with a combination of losing my drinks and tipping some down the loo! Unfortunately it was kind of a sitting in a circle with jugs of pimms and champagne so quite a complicated process.

Some people I know won't have noticed but a couple I'm sure did but are too polite to point it out. Luckily I have my 12 week scan the day before the wedding so hopefully I will be able to announce then rather than feel like a stealth weirdo.

Morning sickness (or all day sickness) only seems to strike at work at the moment. I have gone from being happy in my job to resenting every moment I'm here. Keep calculating how soon I can escape!

Bad - nice to hear all is going well. I remember you of course (I was a unituber on my first IVF but now also tubeless after natural ectopic immediately following failed IVF)

Euro - good luck for scan and yay to 80s cheese.

Euro. Hope the scan went well today.

Very healthy baby girl

May, just may, stop mentalling x

val that's awesome news, congratulations!! That is from the Harmony test, right? I really hope this brings you some good peace of mind now!!

Wow that's absolutely brilliant news val. Delighted for you. Hopefully the mentalling will calm down a bit now but may never disappear completely.

Afm I'm in hospital with a sever uti. Not very glamorous. But being looked after so that's all that matters. The girl in the next bed made me yhink of you euro. Her placenta isn't working properly either so they're scanning and monitoring her daily. She's 30 weeks now so if there's any change for the worse she'll have a cesarean.

Yes, it was the Harmony results plus Nuchal Scan at the FMC today. Just so, so relieved all was looking well.

Plus the scan was infinitely better than my Nuchal Scan at Kingston on Friday I don't even think it is a private vs. NHS thing. My 12 week scan with DS was at UCH and it was similar to the FMC one today. For example they checked the heart, cord and placenta blood flow etc. which Kingston didn't.

Similar to Euro I actually have booked an anomaly scan there too as I was so impressed. My NHS one is at 19+5 so booked the FMC one for 22+6.

Also found out I do have an anterior placenta so the 22+ week one will be a nice reassurance if I am not feeling movement yet.

Oh Nobeer That sounds not only miserable but bloody uncomfortable too. How long are you in for? Is it for IV antibiotics? Sorry, bloody nosey so please ignore!

Great news Val! I think that test is great as it is definitive and such a relief when you find out. None of this 1/350 risk or anything. I calmed down after mine, partially because it meant I didn't have to make a horrible decision, its all in natures hands now.

Nobeer sorry to hear about the UTI. The glamour never ends!

Alls quiet with me. Hitting 25 weeks tomorrow which is wonderful. I'm still at home but lots of work for some reason this week. I'm struggling to sleep due to the heat and also endless detailled dreams. Mostly mildly stressful and not really pregnancy related, but disturbing sleep for sure. I did have a dream were I was walking around, and kept thinking 'I'm supposed to be in bed!! The docs will be annoyed...' but otherwise pregnancy doesn't really feature.

Getting lots of nice kicks now. It took a while to get going but I enjoy them now. Even if it is a bit weird.

Got a lovely maternity leave surprise yesterday. I get a range of benefits which I pay for out of my salary (life insurance, health insurance, pension etc) which I've found out my company will pay for even during the 'non-paid' section of my leave. That includes a pretty hefty pension contribution, including my portion and their portion. Plus my car allowance, which I just consider as cash since I don't have a company car, will be paid for the full 12 months. That's almost £500 a month which I wasn't expecting. Every little helps!

Hope to hear positive news from you Euro good luck

I'm on oral antibiotics. Had a catheter inserted today. Oh my god the relief was amazing! I would like to have a statue erected in honour of the inventor!

Great benefits time. What a lovely surprise. And I had a dream I was pregnant the other night too. Nothing specific but reassuring!

Ouch nobeer - so much glamour! Who'd have thought a catheter would be a good thing. Glad you are being looked after.

Yay Val - excellent news. And time on extra money - us girls get a raw deal even if we go back to work after so great you can get extra whilst you can (and kicking too!).

So these scans which give you reassurance - are they nhs or private? I'm at Kings and have 12 week scan booked in a couple of weeks time but do I need to sort anything else?

Also are pregnancy dreams good? I'm dreaming lots just not about pregnancy ...

Hi Thoughtful I had several 5 scan before my 2 nuchal scan. I had a sneaky peek at 6 weeks at my clinic as my consultant thought I was having twins from my bHCG levels. I had the clinic's official early pregnancy scan at 7 weeks. They then wanted to rescan me at 9 weeks as I had had a MMC at 8.5 weeks. I panicked at 8.5 and booked a Babybond scan as was going mental I had MMC again. I then had the viability scan pre-Harmony test, my NHS 12 week scan and the Nuchal scan today as part of the Harmony package with the FMC

Actually I am not at all and fully intend to have at least two more before 20 weeks.

Yes, excessive but after the MC I have been so paranoid.

You should get a 20 week scan as well with the NHS which looks for anomalies which can't be seen at the 12 week scan. Other than that, in general you need to book private scans if you want to see baby again, although various conditions can mean you'll get scanned more often later on in the pregnancy (like euro is experiencing).

I have been having loads of weird dreams since finding out I was pregnant, but still none about actually being pregnant or the baby! Had lots of, erm, rather X rated dreams in the first couple of months... less so now!

Another one who had very weird/vivid dreams early on in pregnancy! I never dreamt about being pregnant, but remember having crazy dreams all the time, far more than I previously did.

Great scan news val, and congrats on your little girl. We decided not to find out the baby's sex, but I must admit I am wavering a bit on this now. We'll see if we can hold out for another 3 months until s/he arrives!

I had about 3 or 4 scans in the early stages due to bleeding, then one at 12 weeks, then 20 weeks. Due to have a scan (for measuring growth) at 32 weeks which is standard here I think. It was a really long wait between the 12 and 20 week scans. I have found that now I can feel the baby kick/move, I do worry less and don't mind so much about the huge gaps between scans.

I worked this out on another thread the other day and, excluding all those lovely IVF scans, I have had 13 scans so far. I'm back to see the doctor at my ante-natal clinic tomorrow (for no reason I can work out) and then the surgeon who did my cerclage surgery on thursday.

I expect the one on Thursday will be a scan, and I have another booked for next Wednesday. And I'm only 25 weeks!! Scheduled every 2 weeks at least from here for cervical scans, where you can't really see the baby (it's TV) so you can just see a slightly moving head or a whatever is close to the cervix. If they don't see movement they'll do a quick search for a heartbeat, but not more than that.

Oh Val. Lovely news. Girls are great!

I'm just on to say my goodbyes (for now but I hope not forever). I wish you all happy and healthy deliveries (and a good sleeper at the end of it to prevent insanity).

We've been told that we have to wait for 6 months to progress any adoption plans (after last cycle) so all on hold here which is probably for the best as DH was diagnosed with a tumour in his colon yesterday evening. It is probably cancerous and he'll need surgery and chemo .

It's been a rough 6 months here - 2 m/cs, death of lovely dog and now this - and I'm teetering on the edge but have to hold it all together for DD.

I look forward to reading your news as your big days approach.

Bye for now

Res

Res: I'm struggling to find the right words ... I'm so sorry to hear of your dh diagnosis. It's just the last thing you need. I hope the treatment goes smoothly, his recovery is quick and he beats it well and truly into submission. You have really had a bad run of luck... Stay strong and focus on the adoption process that you will be able to start in a few months time. I know of a lady who, after unsuccessful TTC & IVF adopted two lovely little girls (siblings) and she now feels (after quite an emotional journey with lots of highs/lows as well as pain and sadness on the way) that these two girls were always destined to be hers and that her journey in getting them was what had to be done in order for their family to be complete. Some might not find comfort in her story but I do. I just thought you might too.

I clearly understand your need to step back, but will miss you all the same. I wish you all the best and hope your husband gets the best treatment, gets well soon and that you both get the baby/child that you're meant to. You're a wonderful woman and I admire your strength and courage. You've been very supportive on these threads, You will be missed. Good luck on your next journey.

Lots of love res.

Bears. Xxx

Oh Res,

How unfair. You have been through so much already.

I truly hope that your DH gets the treatment he needs to kick the tumour into touch and to make a speedy recovery so you can move on to happier times.

X

val that's great news. :)

Like time I've had loads of scans for various reasons - 6, 7, 8 10, 12, 20, 28, 30, 30 and a half and 31. Next one scheduled for 31 and a half and twice weekly until they decide centime needs to escape. I'd prefer not to have had most of them. I find them incredibly stressful.

res I'm so, so sorry. As if you didn't have enough already. Life really is incredibly unfair sometimes.