The elderberry copter thread #4, for all your hand holding, sausage wanging and burger toning. Entrance criteria: ttc#1 for >12mths, prev berry experience preferable but not essential

[BlindKitty]

New home, as requested!

Hey early birds - Just catching up on all the news as I had a busy weekend (had a mini baby shower with just a few people - didn't want to be too 'grabby' as they say on MN) which was nice and chilled. It's me DH's birthday this week too so we had a family lunch on Sunday - it was really nice for things not to be about me or the baby (honest!) for once.

I too had horrible night-time heartburn, was guzzling the gaviscon yesterday so it's clearly getting worse: joy.

Speaking of tearing, I gave up a bit on my perineal massage - should probably get back on it. It hurt and felt weird! I am worried I seem to have a rather sensitive burger at the moment, it clearly doesn't realise what is about to happen to it.

boom any chance of a photo?

Water - I tend to try to drink a lot of it, but I do worry about always needing a wee. If it helps with water retention, then maybe I should up it as I saw photos from the weekend in which I have actual jowls. I'm sure it's not just fat…

Oo x post brod, how was the shower? Did you enjoy it? I don't think you need to apologise/explain- each to their own...

I'm off to fetch the newbie. Everyone best smiles...

thunder are you just pining for a photo of me because I'm so damn gorgeous, or is it specifically a handstand in the pool you're after? Underwater upsidedown pregnant selfies are usually beyond my photographic ability...

Oooh speaking of photos, Kitty when is your nekked bump shoot? Mine's next Tues and I'm starting to get cold feet!

Brod hope you had a lovely shower, nothing wrong with being grabby grateful for friends buying you lovely baby stuff!

I haven't started crotch massage... I've kind of switched off from everything birth related because I keep ending up in tears when I remember I'm unlikely to get anything but a section. Didn't realise quite how much it meant to me to have a normal delivery until the probability of not having one smacked me in the face - and not even getting the chance to labour. Hey ho, will keep doing the handstands and hope for the best!

Just booked a last minute getaway in the lakes with the husband and dogs for the week after I finish work, the plumber/builder will be here to fix the leaky shower and rotten floor, and I can't cope with being in a building site. I'll be 35 weeks so hoping the babies stay put, going to look up lots of nice flat walks if such a thing exists in the lakes

Either boom as you are so gorgeous but yes I was thinking of the handstanding bump in this instance

You can definitely find flat ground at the lakes as lakes down work so well on slopes - so just walk around at the bottom? It sounds lovely!!

Ooo naked photoshoots!

I normally get a 'sound of music' complex when I go to the lakes and have to get to the top of the biggest hill so I can spin around with my arms spread and feel smug. Walking round the lake instead of climbing to the highest point above it seems like a total cop out however not sure gravity and I are currently friends so it will have to do!

I think you'll have to imagine the handstands, suspect anyone taking a photo of an upsidedown wet fatty in the pool might get their photography equipment confiscated quicksharpish...

so what pool would that be, boom?

Ha, nice try thunder - that's between me and the lucky lifeguard.

Right, have to go and walk the dogs and take a carful of cardboard to the tip. Funtimes!

Nice images there with the handstands and the pregnant Maria-from-Sound-of-Music

The shower was fun, pretty low key - just a lunch in a local BBQ joint and some tea and cakes afterwards which my lovely American friend had made. Yeah I am being a bit over-apologetic about the shower - it was only my mum, MIL and three friends. It was nice to see everyone, and two of the three friends are still back down south so it felt like a chance to catch up. They got me a lovely voucher for John Lewis / Waitrose. (I have another ten mitigating excuses ready for anyone!) True enough though, each to their own!

It is funny boom how large the 'birth experience' looms in our minds - I remember even as a child wondering about having a baby and what it would feel like (although I originally surmised it must come out of either your belly button or your bum). I guess it's seen as a right of passage. But as we all know, having a child (or two!) is the most important aspect of this process, by hook or by crook.

Also have prepped best smile for newbie!

Copter seat fluffed up, sick bag in the seat pocket in front, decaf drinks and ginger biscuits on the trolley...

Well done on all the preparations ladies. Unfortunately out newbie is not quite confident enough yet to come in the copter but I've explained that we're very excited to welcome her and she is to come and say hi whenever she feels ready.

Tell her if she comes and says hello I'll show her my aquabatic handstand skills. Can't see how that wouldn't persuade her to be honest... plus I've budged up now and only have half my bum on a nicely warmed seat and the other half is chilly

Brod sounds like a perfect shower - as long as you didn't do the eating chocolate out of nappies game. Because that's minging

Brod ain't no shame in a bridal shower except that disgusting game pointed out by Boom, which I can now not scrub from my mind's eye. How anyone could eat something having just pretended it was baby poo is beyond me.

Quick question about Harmony/nuchal scan. The FMC in London does a Harmony at 10weeks and a nuchal scan at 12 weeks, as a package. I wanted to book something quickly but was hoping someone could verify for me that the nuchal scan is a)not invasive and as such carries no added risk of miscarriage (it isn't the one where they insert a needle and remove fluid, is it?) and b)that at this scan they can determine the sex of the baby.

Probably overthinking this but the timing is kind of important as we're trying to map out when to tell DH's family.

Sorry sid can't help with the pressing harmony question, we just went NHS. I have a feeling though, and I could be wrong, that it isn't the invasive test (amniosis or something?) you refer to - and that it's only possible they could see the sex, not a given? A Harmony expert should be able to confirm!

No chocolate nappy business, although a friend told me she went to a shower where different pureed foods were put in nappies and you had to smell them to guess what they were. Vom indeed!

Nuchal scan is non invasive (just a normal scan same as the 12 week NhS one). Scan can not determine the gender (too early) but the bloods for the Harmony test can

In essence they take bloods for Harmony test at 10 weeks. When the results are back (which takes 2 weeks) they then give you a normal nuchal scan. The scan is a little pointless (as the Harmony blood results are more accurate than the scan results and the scan results are not taken into account in the Harmony result) but they like to sell it as a package.
Where I went for my Harmony they did the scan first and took my bloods then. They then rang me with the Harmony results 2 weeks later.
The gender can be told via the Harmony as they look for the Y chromosome in your blood... If its there you're having a boy and if its absent you're having a girl.

Sid, the harmony package is all done with blood and ultrasound. It's the harmony test that can tell you the baby's gender by extracting the baby's dna from a sample of your blood. It's much more accurate (>99%) for downs, Edwards and Patau than the standard Nuchal test (about 70% I think) . The nuchal they do at harmony is like the NHS one (ultrasound plus measuring levels of two substances in your blood) but they do a much more detailed scan at FMC.

The invasive test you're thinking of is either amniocentesis or chorionic villus sampling. If you get a very high risk result (1:2) from the harmony test then FMC will do an invasive test for you for free, but only if you want them to.

In my case I wouldn't terminate for Downs, so I wouldn't have CVS/amnio for a high risk Downs result, but if the harmony test comes back high risk for Edwards syndrome (which is what the nuchal gave me a high risk for) I would have the amnio as that's a much more lethal condition. (I've heard FMC is probably one of the safest places to have an invasive test done as they are very experienced.) I have to say this is the worst two week wait of my life and I wish I'd done harmony straight away!

Hope this helps - feel free to PM me if you've more to ask.

OK thanks so much, all of you; I think I was thinking of an amnio. I've booked it an miraculously managed to get appointments on both days I'd hoped for. Let's hope that luck carries forward!

Jess I can imagine to say it's been a hard 2ww so far is a massive understatement. We all went so long believing that the end goal was just getting a positive pregnancy test; it's hard to have so much information available about all the random things that could go wrong but it's easy to lose sight of the fact that all of these disorders are very, very rare, and that it's usually people who have encountered unusual events who post about them online. The odds are in your favor that everything is fine. We are all here for you

Thanks Sid. The testing has really brought home how much infertility is affecting me even after a bfp... if we'd conceived more quickly I'm sure I'd have been happy to have invasive tests and cut the uncertainty short, but it raises the stakes so much to have no idea whether I could ever conceive again. Which is why hanging out in the copter with people who completely get this is so helpful for me just now!

Anyway, hope your Harmony tests go brilliantly and I'm not freaking you out!

Just had the quickest 25 week appt ever, 7 minutes! (and that might be stretching it a bit!)
All good, BP and wee fine had a quick listen to HB too & got my Mat B1 form.
Thankfully did not weigh me or measure, said they don't measure until 28 weeks. Think it must be different in different areas cause I was expecting to be measured, not sure why though

HTH jess & Sid hoping time flies by for you both!

Soo... think the hormones are kicking in at another level over here, have been seriously irritable/sensitive/stressed on & off since mid last week. In between I can be so relaxed its almost worrying! Had a bit of a ranting melt down at work on Friday about essentially f* all, then got upset at OH and went upstairs in tears the other night, again over not much really. Was tough, although I kind of knew it was hormones I still felt like I did and could not quite sort myslelf out. Thankfully OH gave me (and probably himself to calm down as I was being quite unreasonable) 5 -10 mins then came up and said he was sorry for upsetting me. I was so upset I could not even talk for a few minutes
Skin not looking quite so good now either, have really enjoyed not having spots for the first time since I was 11 yrs old, definitely creeping back now

Just had a hot chocolate and given babylicious hiccups I think, its quite funny! though seems to be calming a bit now

loving the thought of you doing handstands boom I was seriously tempted to do a few when baby was in the wrong place the other day, but did not think it was a good idea really - have no idea why, but is it quite safe in water?

foody my 25 week apt was exactly the same in and out in under 10 mins!

Got 28 week one this week so will c what happens. still waiting for apt for anti-d injection at hospital too, midwife was supposed to hav sent the forms off TWICE now!

rubbish!

All my appointments post 16 weeks have lasted less than 10 mins so I wouldn't get your hopes up, but it does seem to depend on your midwife

Jess, are your results due this week or next? Thinking of you and how tough this must be

I had an inkling of things to come earlier on return from the chiro... On the way home was having very light cramps and odd pains. Got home and was dying for a wee but the minute I crouched to sit on the loo I got a very sharp/strong pain that seemed to start in my bum (classy). I shot upright and had to literally groan for 30 seconds until it went. Hasn't come back luckily but the gentle cramps are hanging around. Am hoping this is all good signs but that single pain has scared the life out of me

merk what could the pain be? Awaits booms response as well!

boom photoshoot is sat but I'm a bit jealous about yours actually seeing as yours specialises in nude shots. I'm panicking on case they say no or something when I ask for them nude lol! How embarrassing would that be?! I've put a few pics together what I'm going to show them. Happy to email them if you're interested?

brod I can't wait for my shower! Oh and I'm all for vagina cake, chocolate nappies and even drinking games for anybody not pg or bf'ing!!!

foody my skin is going crap again too, grr!!!