PG after MC: Posifrickitivity thread for the batsh*t crazy

[WhatWillSantaBring]

Welcome ladies, new and old. May we all have dull and boring pregnancies. Pull up a chair, crack open a bottle of (non-alcoholic) wine and settle in for mutual handholding, fishslapping and neurosis.

Question (and I don't mean to upset any newbies by talking birth!): Who has used a Birthing Centre and what are your thoughts on them? We have one about 10/15 mins drive away vs the actual hospital about 30 mins drive away. With DD1 the Birthing Centre wasn't open and we had to go to the hospital (which is where I would have ended up anyway as I had a retained placenta). I'm inclined to use the hospital again as I would never forgive myself if there was something wrong with baby and intervention was delayed by a 25 min ambulance journey to the hospital. My midwife keeps nudging me towards the Birthing Centre (I've booked a viewing). Am I being irrational by not wanting to use it?

Morning garden, I don't have a birth centre where I am

Oops posted too soon below. I don't have a birth centre where I am but would definitely consider it. However I was watching the midwives on bbc2 during the wk and I think one of the ladies had previous retained placenta and they said there was risk of it happening again if it happened last time (it came apart whole no probs though as it happens).
If your mw is pushing it then maybe there's not a risk of that but I'd double check. But yes would definitely consider that option. Hth! Sorry for early morning ramblings!!

Garden its a very personal choice, she shouldn't be pushing you towards one option over another. Personally I'm planning a home birth for this little Pebble - no complications with DS and fairly quick labour (10 hours from first twinge to first cuddle). I actually feel like its safer to labour at home as if there is any inkling that something will go wrong they get you to hospital whereas I was left on my own (with DH of course) for over half an hour at a time in hospital so would have taken longer to spot if anything wasn't quite right.

Cbeebees I'm sorry I can't scroll back on my phone - what is it that's worrying you? So glad they have agreed to scan, good luck for it.

Saggy you are amazingly strong to be dealing with all of this following a miscarriage, I truly have everything crossed for Monday / Tuesday for you! Have you considered what a diagnosis would mean for your family or are you waiting for the results first? One of the mums on my October thread (where I was pre miscarriage) had a nuchal measurement of 9 and was told (pre CVS) that she was incredibly unlikely to have a living baby. I occasionally still check up on the thread and she has now been told baby will have a slight heart defect but nothing that is life limiting or likely to cause any problems. So a bad result initially doesn't mean much in the grand scheme, its all just statistics

My mum came round for tea and she got to feel the baby kick, and got the Doppler out so she could hear the heartbeat. She cried, she has been so supportive throughout this (she miscarried before having me) so its lovely to be able to share this with her. I was born before scans unless any problems so she had to spend the whole of her pregnancy with me stressing in case anything went wrong again!

Rock there's nothing concrete that worrying me, just paranoia. I've had 6 mc preciously and have problems with my uterus shape. I've been taking medication that shouldn't be taken during pregnancy and have no idea how far along I am (somewhere between 5 and 8 weeks so guessing at 6)

Garden I've used the hospital twice before and think if I give bitth again I'd like a home birth or birth centre. I just didn't have a great expiearience in the hospital and would rather things were on my terms in a comfortable environment.

Rock that's so great she got to feel the kick, I this the 1st grandchild?

rockchick that's so lovely about your mum. Pregnancy before scans - imagine that - 9 whole months of not knowing. I can barely cope with 4 weeks.

fod good luck today! Fingers crossed all goes well. Your DS sounds like a star x

Oh and good luck cbeebies too x

Second grandchild - I have a DS who is 2.5. I'm an only child, whereas DH is one of 4 who all have children so its not such a novelty to his mum! My dad is so excited about it all too, he adores DS and spoils him rotten so will hopefully be able to let him feel kicks when I see him at the weekend.

I'm sure everything will go well at the scan for you today, what time's your appointment? You're lucky having such an understanding midwife, I can't imagine having to fight to get a scan like others on here have to!

saggy I'm so glad that bit is done for you now, what an arse that you shouldn't have had to wait though why can't health care professionals get their facts straight at times like this? for being so brave

martha yay for a good scan!

garden I don't think you are being unreasonable not viewing the birthing centre. I think when you've had one experience and needed the hospital it is hard not to worry about it happening again and I think better to be there already than be blue lighted there in a panic. we have a fab birth centre 25 miles up the road we can go to but with first pregnancy I didn't even consider as I knew two ladies who had been driven up there, been labouring lovely then got rushed back down to our hospital (5 mins drive from us) in a flap for intervention. I'm glad I didn't go up there initially last time as it was a blizzard and I would have been sent back immediately for a section and that would have been much scarier than just walking to theatre! I think birth centres are amazing but I wish they had them at the hospitals rather than such a distance away!

rock I've got my vbac appointment next week to discuss chances of normal delivery and I'm going to enquire about home birth (worth an ask as we are so close to hospital if need transfer). I don't know what we would do with DD though? what are you going to do with DS? If it all kicked off in the night I would be labouring in the lounge very close to her room and it wouldn't be practical to move her elsewhere in the night. Also I really really don't want to see anyone else while I'm in labour apart from mw and dh but my mum would prob have to come for DD and I think I would just feel too weird having her in the house too (I absolutely love my mum and we are close, she would dearly love to attend birth being an ex mw but I just feel very very private about birth and don't like being touched or talking when I'm in pain, weird I know but coping mechanism I think).

omri I am struggling with mat clothes. Most come up enormous because I am petite and only have a small bump, but fit around my boobs ok, and my normal clothes really don't fit. And floaty tops don't really cut it for being smart at work I am totally loving my new look mat jeans and leggings at the moment and stretchy black trousers from next, not stylish but so amazingly comfy for sitting at my desk! hoping in another month I'll have more of a bump to fill out the nice dresses I've seen. Until then I've got about 2 work dresses that work just but are a bit uncomfy/awkward around the middle.

Forgot to say good luck for scan ladies today xx

Pixie if things start at night then one of my parents are going to come round and camp out on DS's bedroom floor then just take him straight back to theirs when he wakes up. If its daytime and I feel like anything is starting to happen then he will go to them for a sleepover - if he has to do a couple of practice runs when I've thought things are starting and they haven't, then he just gets a lot of grandparent time I wasn't particularly noisy in labour last time so not overly concerned about disturbing him.

Re smart mat clothes can you wear a blazer, vest top (not maternity, just long) and black trousers? When I was pregnant with DS and work screwed up ordering my maternity uniform that's what I lived in - felt like pyjamas with a jacket over but I was sooooo comfortable and still looked reasonably smart!

rock that's a good suggestion, I just need them to turn the heating on at work first, we've been freezing this week! Also sounds like a good plan with your DS. I am interested to see what they say about things next week, so far the advice I've had from mws has leaned towards a planned section because of my hip and pelvic problems and the possibility that they could limit active labour, but I want to stay open minded and explore all possibilities. That midwives programme has been really helpful in terms of showing lots of different births although every time I watch it I toss and turn the whole night after with the vbac vs section debate raging in my head!

Have a look at Birth Without Fear I found it fantastically helpful when having DS - the blog author had a home birth after 2 sections, it has loads of different women's experiences of different births and is pretty empowering. Its all a bit American but if you can ignore that then its fantastic!

Thanks I will do

I think my heart just stopped.

The hospital just called and said my initial results are normal which means baby doesn't have downs, Edwards or patau.

I can't believe it. I had a panic answering the phone. It flashes through your head its to quick so it must be bad

2 week wait for full results so don't want to count my chickens and jinx myself but its gotta be a good start hasn't it

Thanks for everyone's kind words and saggy hopefully good results quickly for you next xxxxxx

What's all this double posting about. Sorry. I only pressed the button once, honest

That's fantastic Total!!!!!! I'm over the moon for you!

Fantastic total! And they got the results back quickly! Now you can enjoy the rest of your pregnancy saggy, hoping for exactly the same for you.

HURRAH TOTAL!!!!!!!! Best news ever, sitting here with crying happy tears for you pregnancy hormones are out of control this morning. What a fabulous way to start a Friday :)

Saggy have fingers and toes crossed you get your results soon.

Decided to take myself clothes shopping this morning so will brave the centre of town and see what Mat stuff is out there. I've been told topshop jeans are a staple of many people's wardrobes so thought I would start there.

Good luck for everyone having scans today xx

Total thats fantastic. I'm so pleased for you. And for what it's worth I think is justified in posting news like that twice ;)

I saw midwife this morning. After a scan telling me I am carrying a baby hippo, she tells me i am measuring a week under, and no need to have another scan. Grrrr

Afternoon all, total that's fantastic news!
I believe are you really annoyed about another scan! ;)

My scan went well today, I was measured at around 5+4 heart beat was seen and s

Sonigrapher and midwife are both really happy.

The midwife at the EPAU heard is so great. She's booked me in for another scan in 10 days time and I can have another before the 12 week if I'd like it. She sat and listened as I broke down and just cried. She wants me to contact the community wife now and I'm not sure I'm ready for that yet.

(Sorry pressed enter by mistake then was distracted by dd's!)

That's fantastic cbeebees am over the moon for you!