A thread for elderberries who are hovering in the bfp helicopter

[barkingtreefrog]

All elderberry grads welcome and anyone who fills berry criteria: ttc #1 a long time now finally bagged that elusive bfp, over 30...

Come join the next stage of the journey and compare sickness reports!!

Ooh yes! I have that book too, and read it all in a couple of sittings. Thought it was v good - very clearly written and rational, and although it has examples of what she decided, she also has examples of friends who made different decisions, so it's not too 'instructiony' - leaves you to make up your own mind.

barking just got in and seen all your posts, bloody hell! You poor thing. Everyone is of course right in that if you're a bit earlier on then it's perfectly normal not to have seen the heartbeat, doesn't make the wait easier but I have all fingers and toes crossed that this is indeed what happened. If I remember correctly we were cycle buddies but my bfp was a fair bit before yours, so that would support the late ov theory making you a bit earlier in pg than your dates suggest. Think you're both brave and sensible to wait until you can be certain of a definite answer, will spend the next two weeks rooting for you. Sending and hopeful vibes, come and worry here whenever you need to - lots of handholding available!

Your bfp was first Boom but I had 6 days of spotting and thought AF had arrived so I didn't pimp until quite late - I think it was actually cd31or 32. And by then it was an obvious line, no squinting required.

Had a lovely meal with my friend, she was excited as they just had an offer accepted on a house this morning, and was also very happy about me getting engaged and about being a bridesmaid. I didn't want to tell her I might be pg but actually could just as easily not be after the scan today, didn't want to spoil the mood. Also didn't trust myself not to cry in the restaurant. She did ask where we were up to on babies so I told her about the clomid without mentioning anything past then. She then predictably started talking about so and so who has just had a baby and aren't they so tiny when they're new born etc etc. I think I managed to sufficiently not participate in the conversation enough that it didn't go on forever.

Just got home and more spotting. Cramps back again. EPU said to get in touch if there is a lot more blood or the pain gets too bad so nothing to report. Also post dildoscan (although I don't think it's related as it's the same spotting as before it).
Feeling like I don't want to be home alone so going to find DP in the pub. This may be a good or a bad idea as he's with his mates. At this point I don't care though.

Oh barking sending a big squeeze your way. It sounds like you did great to get through the meal and share in the excitement whilst not getting sucked into a conversation that you wouldn't feel in control of. It's a good idea to go and find DP and I hope he and his mates distract you. The waiting is so hard and the spotting on top is a crappy worry that you don't need, even though we all know it can mean absolutely nothing.

Blimey, what a lot has happened today. You must be worn out Barking, in every possible way. Is there no end to these agonising waits we have to go through? I really hope the next scan is a lot more reassuring for you. And that your DP does the right thing when you crash his boys night!

barking you sound like you're keeping it together incredibly well. This must be so worrying and you sound really level-headed and rational about things. So annoying not to have a definitive answer yet, but all the signs seem good so keeping fx

kat thanks for asking. Spotting seems to have stopped for now. For a moment I had a panic that it was just going to get heavier and heavier like the last time but was a total overreaction.
On the other hand, the upchucking is back this evening so I'm trying to take that as a good sign

Thanks for the squeeze Thunder .

Haycorn I think adrenaline was carrying me through yesterday. Woke up early this morning and I just feel drained and very emotional.

Poppy I don't feel like I'm holding it together very well at all! I'm arguing with myself this morning. Maybe I should have gone for the Friday scan. Even if there isn't a heartbeat they should be able to see growth if everything is ok?
But then bad news would ruin a very busy social weekend. If I hadn't had the scan yesterday I'd still be in the same position - not knowing. So I just have to carry on not knowing, but with the advantage of being able to find out whether things are progressing a week on Wednesday instead of waiting until my 12 week scan.
So it's good, right?

I think you did the right thing barking for sure!

Glad to hear the spotting stopped for you poppy.

It's such a nerve-wracking time isn't it!

I've taken to having two morning pukes which is okay as they haven't got much substance - except their very animalistic, I seem to make a pretty wretched dinosaur noise for some reason...

Barking I think you did the right thing. And don't beat yourself up for being emotional. I would plan to wrap yourself up in cotton wool for 2 weeks with lots of nice treats.
Brod, my sickness has been v violent, not at all like normal sickness

Me too barking it is very sensible to wait a bit and try to get through one day at a time until then. The last thing you need is more uncertainty. I would have done the same and then have the same doubts now. Why can't they invent so e kind of window so we can see what is actually going on in there?!

I've only been sick once but I gag and wretch all the time and even that is noisy. Particularly during teeth brushing in the mornings.

Agree with the wise thunder and merk, you made the right decision. Thunder a sun-roof would be so helpful!

Poppy glad the spotting's stopped

I've still not ever been sick but I've been waking up in the middle of the night every fecking night feeling sick because I'm so hungry, despite only having eaten hours before. Last night I stuffed myself to the gills with curry, only to wake up four hours later feeling like I hadn't eaten for days.. Weird.

Oops I should have said 'they're' in my pukey post. I think it does have a lot to do with being hungry actually as it comes on during the day when I'm running low on stomach contents.

If I eat too much though I need a sleep!

Fill sick now talking and reading about it

Morning ladies!
Sounds like there are lots of us having a queasy time of it! For me, is definitely linked to hunger. As long as I eat constantly throughout the day - never more than an hour from a snack - I seem to be OK. Last night's episode was the result of a later-than-usual journey home.

barking sounds like you made exactly the right decision. Just take it one day at a time.

Need to keep the sickness and the crazy at bay tonight. We have family (my uncle and aunt) coming to stay tonight as they have a funeral to go to nearby on Sunday and live miles away. They are lovely people, but don't want to tell them so hoping I can hold it together!

Sunday Saturday!

Who was it who said malt loaf helped? May I thank you from the bottom of my greedy hungry little heart

Me! They have these tiny lunchbox size loaves in the Sainsburys near my work. Totally perfect, especially first thing in the morning or last thing at night - fewer crumbs than biscuits or crackers [grins]
In fact, I might just pop and get some now!

More spotting here. Basically not stopped since yesterday morning, every time I've been to the toilet. Getting redder. Enough this morning that I felt the need to use a lite tampon when going out of the house for a hour to walk the dog. Not enough to call epu, I'll do that only if it's at least full period amount and I'm in pain rather than discomfort. I just wish it would stop. It doesn't help on the trying not to think about it front. At all.

I'm off to snuggle on the sofa under my duvet and send out wedding invitations from my laptop. We are now 'engaged' on facebook so it must be official .

Oh barking poor you, duvet and sofa sound perfect. I think i have read somewhere its best to avoid tampons in pregnancy so you may be best swapping to giant towels

Barking you're really going through the mill. Hope your invitation spree can take your mind off it for a while, hurrah for FB officialdom!

barking cozy-up chicquita, and congratulations on the official engagement! Why are our bodies so tricksome???

merk I took it out again as soon as I got back, just couldn't face a towel when walking in torrential rain in wellies and full waterproofs - already uncomfortable enough!
Off out tonight to a concert (seated, thankfully!) so managing to keep busy .

How you doing now barking?
Got to say I'd been mulling over getting a puppy soon (maternity leave/being at home all day) however weather today reminded me of how miserable winter walks can be!

Been on the sofa all day with a banging headache and period type pain.

I don't mind dog walks in the rain usually, it's just when I'm feeling rubbish.

Hi all.

barking I'm sorry you are feeling rubbish. Are you sure you shouldn't call epu again with this spotting and cramps?

Lovely about the engagement officialdom though!

merk puppies are fantastic but seriously hard work. Do much so that I would think twice about getting one in the future. Baby and puppy? Sounds idyllic but in reality might be a total nightmare!