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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnant (IVF) Worriers Part 3

999 replies

Buzzybee123 · 13/08/2013 19:25

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others!

OP posts:
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keepitgoing · 17/09/2013 09:22

Argh at nct last night we were one couple down as she had the baby, at 30 weeks. In nicu now. Dh is now going to pack our bags just in case.

Shazzamattazzerly · 17/09/2013 11:05

Oh Crikey keep. That's what I'm worried about. I have nothing ready. My mum is coming next week supposedly to paint the kitchen. Right change of plan now. Kitchen can wait must get baby stuff ready. I hope your friend is ok.

OnionRing · 17/09/2013 12:34

I think I have a hospital bag list somewhere! I'll have a look...

keepitgoing · 17/09/2013 12:58

Ooh yes please Mariana. shaz I think you should do the kitchen or it'll never get done... I don't know what happened or if all is ok. I think hospital bag would be least of my worries if I went into labour now, but it does bring it home.

dildals and expat hope you're both ok.

keepitgoing · 17/09/2013 12:59

Ps I love the word 'crikey'! Underused these days, I think.

Shazzamattazzerly · 17/09/2013 13:31

Not in my house its not! My friend and I were on a campaign to bring back old fashioned swearing at one point. It was funny.

Girls I have a confession and feel I've let you down. I've just finished a packet based snack that can only be described as 'fancy pants'. I bought a packet of vegetable crisps from waitrose. . My only defence is that I did add them to my sandwich. Smile Does that make it ok?

Buzzybee123 · 17/09/2013 14:35

onion you have a list for everything bows down in admiration to the queen of lists

keep I hope that the couple and baby are ok, Boots and Tesco still have their 3 for 2 offers

shazza I hope crikey was said with an Aussie accent Grin we shall forgive you especially as I ate 2 lots of crisps yesterday, that makes up for your faux par :)

OP posts:
SweetieTime · 17/09/2013 14:55

onions I had a hospital bag list, I had thought it came from you. there is a list imposter out there.

Shazza I have also made up for your posh snacks with a jumbo bags of salt & vinegar twists. if anyone else gas had these recently is it my imagination or are they less salt & vinegary?

OnionRing · 17/09/2013 14:56

I have lost the list. Here is a freestyled one!

Flip flops / slippers
Warm socks
Something to give birth in (or use hospital gown)
Pyjamas or nightie for afterwards that allows bf
Something to go home in (comfy mat stuff like yoga pants, tshirt and hoodie is good)
Massive black knickers
Maternity pads
Nursing bra
Breast pads
Lansinoh cream
Water bottle
Dressing gown
Usual toiletries (miniatures are v good as you can pack a bag and just leave it in there)
Baby wipes (good for general wiping up of you and environment!)
Hair bobbles
Glasses
Phone
Charger
Purse
A couple of carrier bags for dirty clothes
Anti bacterial gel
Anti bac wipes (depends how grotty you think the hospital is - mine was fine but is very new and sparkling)
Camera

For the baby:
3 short sleeved vests
3 sleepsuits
Muslins
Nappies (about 10)
Newborn hat
Scratch mits
Cellular blanket
Cotton wool

They always say an outfit for the baby to go home in but I'd just leave them in a vest, sleepsuit and hat and put a cardie type thing on them.

I'd say they are the essentials. Might also want iPod, book or magazines, ear plugs, snacks and extra pillows. Some people turn up with mahoosive suitcases, I travel quite light so had a rucksack. Can be better to pack one bag for you and your change bag for the baby.

Anyway, the above should do you day of birth and overnight and then you'd hopefully be going home. Nothing extra for a section, just make sure you have the massive knickers.

Oh and a car seat if driving home.

OnionRing · 17/09/2013 15:00

I think I just had the baby essentials list sweetie! There's bag lists all over the place but some are totally over the top.

No crisps here but I did have an Ikea filthdog. Mmm. Those veg crisps are all wrong shazz, they're trying to make something inherently evil virtuous. Just embrace the evil.

Shazzamattazzerly · 17/09/2013 15:26

Onion I fall at your feet oh great one. I will get out my little wheels suitcase and let the packing commence.

I am hanging my head in shame at the misguided snack purchase. I love salt and vinegar twists but haven't had them lately so can't comment of the taste change sweetie. If I'm honest I prefer salt and vinegar discos. Smile

Ginestas · 17/09/2013 17:02

Hello all. Blimey (trying to continue the old fashion swearing), I've missed lots of chat!

onion!! I love the name change. And you so should run some classes or write a book. Your lists are amazing and now DIY advice! I don't know what I'd do without my baby stuff spreadsheet, based on your other list. Hope ringlet is doing ok and the baby rice is helping.

dildals a massive congrats on having Bella home! Such good news. And it's so lovely to see you worrying about normal parent things, rather than having to deal with the hospital hell.

keep eek at your nct friend. Hope they are ok. I like onion's tip of buying miniatures of smellies for the hospital bag and may start to stock up.

shazz I can indeed confirm that the Croydon Ikea sells veggie filth dogs. Although Mr G is normally in such a strop by that point, that I'm rarely allowed one. What did you think of the last nct? I found it more useful than the previous one, but was so pleased that you picked the teacher up on her sweeping gender biased statements. It was beginning to miff me right off (some more OF swearing..)

sweetie, noks, fairy and buzzie I'm with you on being massively uncomfortable at night and feeling like I need to piss like a race horse, but only being able to squeeze out a few drops! What is that about?! I have lost the ability to tell if I need to pee or not?

noks I was starting to feel a bit pukey in nct when we had label up the squashed innards of a preggo. Lucky I just have to do the giving birth bit and not watch... Hope Mr N is behaving after his beating talking to. I had a rant last night about 'the shit all over the house', which appears to have had zilch affect on the piles of papers and dirty mugs everywhere.

sweetie OMG the knitted Olympins are awesome! When we've all had our babies, we should get your mum to do knitted versions of them.

buzz did I say congrats on the scan?? I hope you feel a little comforted and have found your baby box, which must be a happy/sad moment. Can't believe your scan was only half an hour - mine was a good hour! My tummy was rather sore. Do you have any more scans now? We have the growth one a week on Monday, eek.

rasp congrats on ET and I have frostie envy! Hope the 2ww is going smoothly. After my successful FET, I spent the first few days sprawled in bed, eating chocolate - it was easter- and watching box sets (Gossip Girl much to my shame...)

crisps where do you get hold of Geordie Shore?? I'm off work today with a migraine (boo) and now feel well enough to indulge in some trash tv...

I have the glucose tolerance test on thurs. Not looking forward to it as it involves fasting, going sans gaviscon and drinking lucozade. If I don't puke, I'll be pleased. Have to have the test cos of my Dad's type 2 diabetes and really hope it's negative as can't do without my choccie biscuits and cheese cake.

Talking of which and all the talk of snacks on here, I made the mistake of weighing myself at the weekend. At 27 weeks I've put on 2 fecking stone! Am hoping it's all boobs and bump, but know it's all on my thighs and arse and certainly not the 2lb baby. Does anyone know if you keep piling it on in the 3rd trimester? I think in theory you're only meant to put on 2 stone throughout the whole pregnancy?!

Dildals · 17/09/2013 19:27

I second earplugs for hospital bag and bring that peribottle (squirty bottle) for your weeing sessions in the hospital post birth. Not that you'll have stitches of course. And bring your TENS machine if you have one. I wore a sports crop top bra and shorts most of the time, with a big tshirt to cover myself up if I needed to go on to the hallway. It's so hot in the hospital, I guess not being helped by the hot weather at the time.

Then again, I had no hospital bag either, I just went. So if push happens to come to shove, you'll manage just fine. Hubs can always nip back home and pick up things.

OnionRing · 17/09/2013 19:40

How are things Dildals?

Gin I put on exactly two stone but I definitely piled it on at the beginning then hardly any in the third trimester. I still have about 10 pounds to lose and strangely it's all on my thighs. I wouldn't worry, there's nothing you can do about it while pregnant anyway so fingers crossed for the GTT and you can always lose it afterwards. I'm losing a pound a week just by not eating snacks, I still eat a lot a mealtimes.

Shazzamattazzerly · 17/09/2013 19:57

Hi ladies

Gin Hope you had a good weekend in the badlands!

If its any consolation I've also nearly put on 2 stone and you certainly don't look like you have. You have a lovely neat bump! I'm hoping its extra blood, fluid and baby. Maybe we have 1 stone babies on board Smile

I'm not sure about NCT. I don't know what I was expecting but I don't think that we do much. She doesn't seem very with it and prepared to me. She seems to be winging it. I had to say something. I couldn't sit there while she made such a ridiculously sexist statement about mothers having to bite their lips while their menfolk make a hash up of baby care. It's not the Middle Ages for goodness sake. DP is as qualified as I am to competently change a nappy. Also I don't think that she facilitates much interaction and getting to know each other. Given that that is mostly the reason why we are there. Trying to label squashed up bits of a pregnant body in groups hardly promotes interaction. But I'm being harsh. Hopefully it will get better and you are right. Last week was better than the first week.

No snacks onion? Does the filth dog count Wink

How are you dildals? How's our little girl?

Big hello to everyone else. I'm attempting ballroom dancing tonight.

OnionRing · 18/09/2013 06:23

She sounds hopeless and I've always heard that NCT leaders are variable, but it's a lot of money to shell out. (My DH is infuriated by the 'ooh silly men' theme that he reckons runs through most TV advertising.) Well done for speaking up though!

I'll think you'll find the filthdog was my LUNCH. I had an apple too, to cancel it out...

Shazzamattazzerly · 18/09/2013 06:35

I feel like I'm being mean. Apparently she has been teaching NCT for 30 years. A lot of it I'm sure are my expectations. After spending £360 I was expecting A LOT!! Plus I've done a lot of reading on my own so she cant win really. Anyway she is perfectly nice. We'll have to see how it pans out.

Sounds like your lunch was perfectly balanced, protein, carbs with 1 of your 5 a day Smile

I do not, repeat ,DO NOT want to go to work.........

Shazzamattazzerly · 18/09/2013 07:44

Blimey my bus stinks of dope! That's living in the hood for you.

Ginestas · 18/09/2013 08:40

Don't inhale too deeply shazz! I totally agree about the teacher. We decided that she's a bit of a crap presenter. She must know her stuff, but presents it in a muddled, waffley way and she seems nervous, which is odd seeing she's been doing it for 30 years! We had a chuckle in the car about anyone calling her when in labour... The men feel this/women feel that theme did annoy me a lot though. But as you say she is nice and I feel mean bitching! Maybe we should try to organise lunch after one class to get to know the others?

I agree onion that filth dog and apple sounds balanced! Protein, bit of carb and vit c. I hope you had more than one filth dog - they're rather small! And thanks, you've given me hope that I may not pile on another stone in the 3rd trimester...

If I'm still awake by this evening I may go to the yummy mummy yoga. Had an awful nights sleep, with neighbour shouting at her boyfriend (am looking forward to getting them back with a screaming baby) and DH's snoring. I don't know how the baby will sleep through the noise, when she arrives!

Shazzamattazzerly · 18/09/2013 08:56

Lunch is good idea. We could go to either of the pubs nearby. Some of the other couples are quiet or is it just that we are loud?Blush Hopefully out of class we will all warm up abit.

So you are going to yoga? I'm prepping for my show next week so have to work on that tonight. I sent the teacher a cheque and she has emailed me about going to class. She is keen to round up participants.

I had a 'your pregnancy at 32 weeks' email this morning from something or other that I've signed up to and it said I'm due to put on half a kilo a week in the 3rd trimester as the baby gets fatter.

SweetieTime · 18/09/2013 09:40

Ladies I have a confession, My name is Sweetie and I have never had a filthdog. We live very near an IKEA, about 20 minutes walking distance away. I have had their ice creams but never a filthdog, I might have to go just for the experience. I will take an apple to make it a balanced meal too.

Shazza I have decided to give NCT a miss as I think our experience would be quite different to most in the class. I think it would be an expensive way to meet others in a similar position to us so I am going to stick to twin clubs. I think it might just be a bit earth mother focussed for me and I can not imagine what my roughty tufty Northern DH would make of any of it, probably wouldn't go back after the first week.

I am a bit worried about my lack of weight gain as I have only gained 11 pounds and am now 25 weeks with twins. The twins are both big apparently and their weight was estimated at BT 1lb7oz & GT 1lb5oz at last scan, so 3lb of the gain is baby. I have never been weighed at my consultations so they wouldn't know and have never asked. Do you think I should mention it. I didn't suffer sickness and have eaten well throughout, apart from the maize snack attacks. The worry never stops does it??

Nokkie73 · 18/09/2013 10:07

Gadzooks. I have woken up this morning and someone has replaced my previously dinky (yet perky) coffee coloured buzzwams with massive dongers. Shock. How did this happen ?

We are en route to a swanky hotel in Cheltenham for little break. DP has paid for it so I am mildly happy there's no pleasing some Our 'romantic' break will be slightly hampered by the in-laws joining us but it should be nice to get away.

shazza your nct 'teacher' sounds like she needs a kick up her kaftan clad backside. Good on you for speaking out. £360 bucks is a lot of money for her to sod about with plastic innards once a week.

As for weight gain, I think I have put on about six ish kilos so far. I put on quite a bit during my IVF fail (about a stone I reckon) so it's hard to tell. Mainly because I am kidding myself that I was nine and a half stone before I got diffed (um, yeah right). I was more likely about eleven stone and a bit but I have always been big boned. Oh shaddup you lot. It's TRUE.

fairypangolin · 18/09/2013 10:14

On weight gain, I haven't weighed myself since I was about 30 weeks but I recall I had put on about 2 stone by then. I put on 10lbs in the first trimester because of eating carbs to fend off nausea and because I wasn't able to exercise. I had the same pattern with DS as well. I think the standard advice of 'no weight gain in first trimester, 1 stone second trimester and 1 stone third trimester' is far too prescriptive given how differently each woman's body reacts to being pregnant. And it just makes loads of people worry that they are either over or under and unless you are an extreme there really is no reason to worry either way. I don't plan to weigh myself again until I'm about 2 weeks post partum as otherwise I will just fret for nothing.

gin I think the bladder confusion is because your womb is pressing on it which makes it hard to empty fully in one go. Try leaning forward on the loo, I find this helps although now my bump is so big even that is awkward.

Only 8 days left to go at work! My office partner is not in today and I am very tempted to close the door and have a snooze. I had a home visit with the midwife on Monday and everything still seems fine for a home birth, eg baby head downwards.

OnionRing · 18/09/2013 12:58

Don't worry Sweetie I would eat when you're hungry and trust your body. In one pregnancy I weighed less at about 16 weeks than I had at the beginning. I did start eating crackers and cheese at night to add a few more calories. Or a filth dog.

Fairy I've never heard that theory about weight gain, I piled it on at the beginning and then it stopped and I stopped weighing myself anyway. The day before my section I weighed myself out of curiosity and I was exactly two stone heavier.

noks cherish that pertness... Ahahaha. Bad luck with the in laws but other than that element it sounds lovely.

I wish I could do old fashioned swearing but I can't. I am forever biting my tongue in front of children and my mum and have a horrible habit of prefacing almost every sentence with '...kinell'. I have the world's sweariest boss too so I'm really bad at work too. DH reckons he's never known a 'respectable educated' woman swear as much as me. Proud. I'm not like this at all in writing though, funny innit?

Dildals · 18/09/2013 19:55

Quick HI from me, while I am milking myself, now there's an image! (I still need to express after a feed to empty out the breast and keep up supply).

Our buggy got delivered yesterday so we took our first outing to the local Sainsburgers. V exciting. And today we went to the park and had cake and coffee, now that's more like it!

Tomorrow we have a check up with the neonatal ward. In anticipation I have tried weighing Bella on the kitchen scales. I can report back that she does not fit comfortably in a mixing bowl, but the serving tray worked quite nicely.

My mum's been over and she's been doing the 9 am feed which allows me to have a heavenly lie in! DH will be taking a week's paternity afterwards and he's told me to book a hair appt and he's said he wants to do a few night shifts. (Although I am happy to them actually, she takes forever to finish a bottle, so doing the nights on the boobylicious is much more efficient. This girl loves to breastfeed, Bella I mean.)

Waves to everyone!