Pregnant (IVF) Worriers Part 3

[Buzzybee123]

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others!

Oh, mariana that's incredibly kind and i will actually take you up on said offer!

Our rooming in has been postponed btw :( she took a long time to finish her bottle last night and they had to put the ng tube back in ... Baby can't be rushed ...

keep she has been maintaining her temperature for a while now, so that's all good. And about leaving the room, well, at home you wouldn't leave them alone either would you? I can go to the loo or fill my water bottle up, but i don't think i can nip down to the Costa!

Yes, she'll do things in her own time but I'm sorry it is postponed. Can you not take her with you? I guess she's still v delicate.

Dildals I just made this afternoon's post, two small ones on their way.

dildals sorry it has been postponed, hopsfully it will only be for a day or two

mariana I agree with you about being a wanted a baby, my sister was an unplanned teenage pregnancy and finding out had a profound affect on her, although to be honest she had issues before that, I was supposedly a baby that was in the planning for a few years.

shazza I'm not too sure if I have felt her move, the pains we not that worrying I just haven't had any that strong and short and stabby

noks I wasn't too worried about the pains more the 'feeling normal' I did almost call MAU, although a few days ago I stopped the cycline and omeprazole as I was feeling better, that half baked idea has come to bite me my mahoosive ass, as I've had bad indigestion and more sickness today I'm struggling to engage my brain these days

keep My 20 week scan is this Friday i'm a bit excited but also a bit scared

waves to everyone else

keep she's still being fed by a tube. Technically you could take a baby home on a tube, but she needs to learn how to feed orally. They like to keep an eye on that, because babies could vomit and aspirate fluid in to their lungs. Other babies, that are less well, 'desat' as it's called when they are fed. This means that their blood oxygenation (saturation) drops when they are feeding. If Bella starts desatting while feeding then that would be An Issue. She's not though, fingers crossed. They basically want to see that she can feed for 24 hrs and put weight on, orally, rather than via a tube. Which makes sense to me.

Pff. Had a bit of a rubbish day at SCBU today, will tell later. Bella's OK, she will get there, in her own time!

On another note - ever since birth I can't feel my bladder being full anymore. I need to remind myself to go to the loo, because my bladder doesn't tell me anymore. If I forget about the loo I start to leak, thinking it is discharge. My bladder has completely gone on holiday. Just to reassure you, I only start leaking when bladder is really full. I pee like a shire pony afterwards.

Any ideas? Will this function return eventually? It's not particularly cumbersome.

It makes sense to me too, the last thing you want is her discharged before they're absolutely happy with her.

About your bladder. Yes, I had that as a result of being catheterised (which I assume you probably were too?) It takes a good couple of months to return to normal, until then I just learned to take myself to the loo every couple of hours. Mine is completely back to normal now though. No leaking at all!

Trenchlet has a cold again. At least she's old enough for me to use menthol now but I fear it could be another long night.

I meant take her with you to Costa on your nights in .dildals! :) Sorry you've had a bad day. She's done so well so far, she's not even at term yet! But gosh it must be hard when you had your hopes up for Friday. God, the bladder thing sounds nasty, the opposite of now when I feel the need to pee All The Time even if there are only a few drops

Gah to new schools and subsequent colds. I have had about an hours sleep with both girls too snotty to sleep properly. I am on my own too and it is all such hard work.

Hello ladies
Am hunkered down in my hotel bed in Portugal waiting for DH to wake up so thought I'd say hello!
Dildals it sounds like Bella is getting stronger every day, as the poo spray and fart on finger stories would demonstrate!
Shaz I'm glad to hear the 3D (or is it 4D?) scan went well! I'm too chicken to have one since a friend told me the one of her son looked like 'the love child of Mick Jaggar and Skeletor.' Needless to say, he wasn't born looking like that!
Buzz have the pains eased off? Am sure everything is normal with you and buzette. Are you still sicky you poor thing?
Ceeara sorry to hear your bambino was uncooperative for the scan- can't wait to see if the bloody Chinese gender predictor can actually be right (once in every five or six cases?? Lol)
Mariana the purple bum story also made me chuckle :). Thanks for the continuing words of wisdom re BFing and things needed to buy- I'm hoovering them up here!
Noks, god love you and your big pillow. I feel equally deeply about my dreamgenii and have missed it while on holibobs. Ps, my autocorrect wanted to change holibobs to 'holy ova'. What the fuck.
Hello gin. This may not have been your intention, but I had to chuckle at your comment about mr gin's broken balls. Hope NCT with Shazz is fun.
Hello fairy, crisps and sweetie. I'm doing this from memory on my phone so I'm really sorry if I've forgotten anyone.

I'm 28 weeks today!
Weather in Portugal is bliss and seems to be agreeing with miniMrs who is getting very wriggly and kicky these days. We've also picked a name for her! It's quite a popular one these days so given the number of girls due on this thread I'm sure she won't be the only one.
Had an epic moment by the pool yesterday. Went for a dip and emerged from the shallow end in my head like Ursula Andress in that Bond movie, but given my milky white flesh, udder like norks and unwieldy arse was actually more like the creature from the black lagoon. Anyhow, I glanced to my left and who should I see but the fragrant and very brown Colleen Rooney, with the less fragrant and very pasty Wayne. Turns out they were staying here too, along with little Kai. No sign of the new baby though.
They were quite happy to chat to guests on sunbeds nearby but I wimped out of trying to start a conversation. DH knows absolutely nothing about football either so he was worse than useless!

Wow MrsH get you on your celebrity holiday! Sounds gorgeous. Have a lovely time. The 3d bit of the scan are the pics and the 4d is the DVD.

Dildals sorry yesterday wasn't good. You ok? Absolutely Bella had to go at her own pace. We are all rooting for her to come home with you but safely and when she is strong. You have been on a steep learning curve re medical stuff haven't you?

Oh Mariana I feel for you. You must be exhausted. Does your mum live nearby? Could she look after trenchlet for a few hours while you get some sleep today? You have to sleep. You can't keep running on empty.

Buzzy you'll be fine at the scan. It is nerve wracking but a massive relief to see the bubba and know it's ok.

I'm feeling the affects of mr shazz bring preoccupied over the past couple of weeks and need an evening of being looked after by him. Hopefully he got the very large hint to that effect this morning.

Anyway it's Wednesday. Which makes it practically the weekend xx

Wow MrsH get you on your celebrity holiday! Sounds gorgeous. Have a lovely time. The 3d bit of the scan are the pics and the 4d is the DVD.

Dildals sorry yesterday wasn't good. You ok? Absolutely Bella had to go at her own pace. We are all rooting for her to come home with you but safely and when she is strong. You have been on a steep learning curve re medical stuff haven't you?

Oh Mariana I feel for you. You must be exhausted. Does your mum live nearby? Could she look after trenchlet for a few hours while you get some sleep today? You have to sleep. You can't keep running on empty.

Buzzy you'll be fine at the scan. It is nerve wracking but a massive relief to see the bubba and know it's ok.

I'm feeling the affects of mr shazz bring preoccupied over the past couple of weeks and need an evening of being looked after by him. Hopefully he got the very large hint to that effect this morning.

Anyway it's Wednesday. Which makes it practically the weekend xx

shazza I catch myself inadvertently answering questions from parents and, occasionally, junior doctors ... I have learned way too much. Yesterday I told the nurse my little neighbour has to lie on her left side (the occupational therapist has recommended this but unless you put a road sign up nurses don't actually read notes). (I look after my little neighbour a little, she's too cute, she has Noonan's, another disease you'd never knew about.)
The other day a junior doctor came in asking about premmie dummies, he didn't know they existed and he wasn't entirely sure what he was asking for, I piped up with 'oh the little pink dummies for babies

Oh my God Dildals. There are no words. You are brave, courageous and an inspiration. Hang in there honey. Today might just surprise you.

Xx

Apologies for that massive rant ladies. Afterwards I was looking for a 'delete post' button but couldn't find one.

Don't delete for our sakes. I think it's better to have a rant (and that was too coherent to be classed as a rant). Your situation is immensely difficult, yet it is so much less difficult than a few weeks ago as Bella has come on so much. This will all be past very soon and you need never set foot in there again. You have been and continue to be brave and strong, I think Bella would be in a far worse predicament if she didn't have you as her mummy.

Can you use the time prior to your rooming in to look after yourself a bit. A couple of long baths or something relaxing / fortifying?

On that subject I feel grim today but needed to go to town to get more school skirts for DD1 as I've been dragging them out of the wash basket and dabbing the grot off them as I didn't have enough. I thought I'd buy myself a little treat but couldn't even think of one. Pathetic.

I can't ask my mum as she was here most of last week and she's nearly 70. I am going to ask DH to take a day off asap and let me have a couple of naps in the day. I'm going to the baby clinic this afternoon and will ask what they think about this constant feeding.

You don't need to delete dildals. We are here to support you. And as mariana said your post was extremely coherent and moving. I'm amazed at your strength and fortitude and that of all the other parents with you. I hope that today brings a joyous moment to you no matter how small.

Mariana I hope you can organise something with DH. Sounds like you need some recharge time.

Work is dragging. I'm sitting on a park bench getting some fresh air and peace.

dildals don't delete. You shouldn't know all that stuff but you do and it is awful. I just hope that in a few months you will be sat in Costa with a latte while Bella naps peacefully having forgotten it all. Don't worry about progress, just skip back a few pages and see how far she has come, our little mascot star!

I want to tell you a story. After a horrendous pregnancy, a stillbirth and a horrific time on the maternity ward, DH picked me and dd1 up from the hospital. After I had strapped dd into her car seat I slumped into the front seat and thought about how odd it was to finally be a family, all together in one car with no one else. DH said nothing but hit the power button on the iPod-he'd lined up one day like this by elbow to play. We sat there and listened to it and I cried tears of joy all the way home because I just felt so happy and as though we were finally moving forwards from the nightmare. That moment everything just clicked into another phase and it was amazing. I still can't listen to the song without crying. In the words of the great Jon Bon Jovi, keep the faith, it WILL get better, I promise, and soon you will be able to retreat into your own little family world of bliss and ignore all the rubbishness and knobheads who you don't want to speak to.

mariana how is the sleep deprivation today? It feels like being hungover and is totally depressing, ugh. I do hope you catch a lucky night soon, when will you get some help back so that you can sleep a little? We need our oracle on top form . I hope the feeding is just one of those growth spurts and that by the weekend, or is trenchlet going through the dreaded 4month sleep regression....dd had a fantastic tantrum today. 40 whole minutes of her wanting to wear a dress that she found in a bag from the loft that was for 9-12months. It fits but she refused to wear leggings with it. Forced a top on her but couldn't get jeans on for the love of god so DH and I shoved her in the car in a t shirt in pants and drove her to nursery like that (we did then get her trousers on of course). I admire her spirit but she is a nightmare when it comes to clothes...

mrsHY oh la la to be holly bobbing with the roonsters, love it! You need to turn colleen into your BFF and tell us all her secrets, I love a bit of sleb gossip me.

Went to the mw today as have been feeling 50 shades of shit lately, I just can't breathe properly or walk or eat or sleep or anyfuckingthing at the moment and I feel completely miserable. She asked me to stay off work until tues when I see my consultant anyway which is a huge relief as work has been I,possible, but I feel so guilty for being off. My gorgeous, leggy blonde Spanish friend just had her baby and she worked until 38 weeks, in designer clothes and 4 inch heels the whole time, and I just feel like a fucking lazy useless lump. Ecstatic to be pregnant but ugh. Just not sure what to do about work, I just can't manage any more but 24 weeks is far too early to throw the towel in. If it wasnt for the saintly DH I don't know what I'd do. .

oh dildals my goodness what a hell of a lot you, and all the other parents, are going through. Do keep posting, we love you and Bella and cannot wait for you all to go home as well. I'm sorry I don't really know what to say, but you are doing so well, and Bella is so so lucky to have you.

sorry you're feeling like crap crisps but you do have twins in there you know. That's like pregnancy squared I think!! And who knows what your friend was like when she got home. 4 inch heels though - that is impressive. Your DD sounds great, it must be exhausting, but at the same time those are the sorts of things you'll remember when she's older and laugh at. You're having a tough pregnancy with the sickness and everything, I'm glad you've got some time off till next week. When are you planning to stop work? Am glad your DH is being wonderful. I have to say I think if I was the partner I wouldn't be so patient as mine is being.

I've got quite a painful lower back, especially when I get up from lying down, and have to hobble round for a while feeling ancient. I can't decide if exercise is making it worse, or if I should stop and rest it. I've just been doing the Tracy Anderson DVDs most days. But I feel like if it seizes up it'll be worse. Any thoughts?

buzzy how are you - Friday isn't long now to check up on your little girlie! :)

mrsHY check you out in your swanky hotel with the Rooneys!!! Glad you're having a lovely time. Not jealous at all... Colleen might be glamorous, but she has to be married to Wayne!

Keep I would advise to do gentle stretches for your back. Don't do any jumping around. When mine was bad I did cat stretches on all fours followed by gentle hip circles again on all fours. I also found relief by being on all fours then moving backwards as if to sit on your heels keeping your back flat and arms straight. I found that really stretched my lower back. I also had 3 days complete rest. I didn't leave the house and hardly got off the sofa. Actually thinking about it I'm tempted by that thought this weekend!

Crisps sorry you are feeling rotten. Work is a hard one because I'm guessing you can't be flexible or rearrange hours as a teacher. Or work from home. Maybe your consultant will sign you off a bit.

At spirited threenagers. I often see kids in Spider-Man outfits and wellies and wonder if the mother just lost the battle that day.

I loved your story it made me well up and also reminds me to look forward to a time when the 3 of us will be together. Thanks for sharing. I've been a bit teary today. It's only tiredness and hormones but it always seems much worse doesn't it?

dear dear dildals really everything you say makes sense and i am sure we would all be saying the same (or aspiring to, you really are amazing how you've handled this) in your shoes. Thank god you are coming to the end of at least one tunnel and you will be able to be at home with Bella soon. It is remarkable progress in such a short time really since she is in a way still 5 weeks pre-term now.

mariana my god hourly feeding still (or again!) that is horrendous. I only had that for a day or two with DS and otherwise he was at least 2 hourly. I hope that when you get some rice mush into her that helps at least. I also hope that your DH can give you a break asap.

crisps I sympathise over the clothing issue with DD. My DS went through a similar phase but he is able to choose his own clothes now with some degree of sense and generally will concede my point of view if I insist. Mind you I have threatened and still do at times to take him to school in his pants if he doesn't get dressed NOW.

Re: your glamorous Spanish friend - pregnancy is such a varied experience and some people really just sail through it. That said, some people just appear to sail through it and are hurting on the inside. 4 inch heels seems to be rubbing it in a bit to me though! And you are expecting twins with a DD already so the burden is that much greater. I'm really glad you can stay off work for a bit longer.

mrs well I hope it's a nice hotel despite the riff-raff!

keep buzzy noks - hiya!

Well for my own grumbletime, I was at an all day work meeting yesterday which just killed my hips and back and required 4 hours travelling by train (left home at7am, returned at 8pm), then when I was reporting on it to my boss, he pointed out that if I had my driving licence I would be able to do these things more quickly. He's been at me to get my driving licence for years - but when I said that really the last few months it has not been in any way possible to do that because I have NO SPARE TIME OR ENERGY he suggested I could have spent my holiday in Wales with DH giving me lessons and DS in the back seat. And that if he were in my position he would be keen to qualify. What a load of bollocks! Usually he is a kind and understanding boss but he gets fixated on something and finds it impossible to see anyone else's point of view. Who at 35 weeks pregnant is keen to get their driving licence? I am just keen to get through each day!

oh and hi shazza!

Dildals I am not surprised you feel so upset by your current situation and how can you not gain unwanted knowledge when plunged into it. You shouldn't want to delete such an emotional post as it is how you are feeling and is very real. I hope you have had some comfort today. It won't be long until Bella is home where she belongs and you can leave the hospital behind.

Crisps your story of your experience taking DD home has me welling up too. Try not to compare yourself to leggy Spanish friend, you are having your pregnancy and everyone is so different. Hope you feel a bit better by the time you have your consultant appointment next week.
My work colleague says she picks her battles with DD, what she wears is let go but what she eats isn't, so crisps for breakfast isn't allow but tutu to nursery is.

Mariana sounds like you are having a tough time too. Could you order DD1 school skirts online and get them delivered?

MrsH well jel of your hobnobbing with celebs, hope you are enjoying your time away with the Rooneys

Does anyone intend to swaddle? or has anyone done this with their previous DC? I have seen mixed reviews especially as DC can overheat more easily when swaddled but as we are due in Winter would extra blankets be required? Anyone got any advice?

fairy tell your boss to shove his narrow arrogant minded opinion up his fucking arse SIDEWAYS he has no right to tell you what you should be doing with your personal time !! Tell him his job is to ensure his staff are well taken care of while at work and that he is obviously failing in that role.

dildals This is the point of the thread to let it all out, we are here to listen to you, you are experiences every parents worst nightmare, no one would expect you to be bright and breezy about it, I cannot imagine the emotion stress and rollercoaster you and your DH are on, to me you are amazing and you as a family unit have come so far, there will be little set backs but you will over come them because that is the kind of person you are :)

crisps glad you have some time off, don't feel guilty, its a job not your life, they will manage somehow, as for your colleague, I wonder if she really flew through it or just put up a good front you never know what happens behind closed doors, also you have two little ones growing inside you :)

mrsh oooh look at you and your posh hobnobbing on your holy ova

mariana I hope you get that nap you need

I woke up dry wretching with some force, have felt crap so had today off, thankfully Barry is back tomorrow so he can save me from another night of beans on toast

Crisps, thank you for telling that story. I don't have a moment like that as such but I have lots of little moments. Even today feeling awful, I was feeding her while rocking in the rocking chair and watching the rain in the garden and felt so happy that we got our baby after all the horror we went through. The sadness obviously never goes but it does become a quieter sadness and something that happened rather than something that is happening. If that makes any sense?

On a lighter note. The fights we have over why you have to wear leggings under a too short dress. It's infuriating. She always tries to wear a tshirt with just tights too and that's a whole other battle. But mummeeeeee nobody can see my bottom through my tights....

I went to the baby clinic too and they said to wean her as she's probably not getting enough from me, her weight has dropped off her curve a bit. I shall go out for baby rice tomorrow and start pureeing veg. Hurrah!

DH is back thank god and he's about to take her while I get an hour or two.

I forgot to laugh at holidaying with the Rooneys. I don't mind Collette but he's grim.

Oh yeah and get behind that wheel fairy...

I'll be back at 2am no doubt but going to sleep now. Hurrah!