I am getting rather annoyed at people asking 'was it planned?' when I tell them I'm pg with no.3

[cupcakes]

Especially when they say that before they say congratulations.
a) why are they bothered anyhow?
b) It's a little bit personal!

It was planned but I'm not sure I'd want to tell every aquaintance I met if it wasn't.

Pudmog - at your gp!!!! That's bloody terrible!!

You can't win you know. Ds is 3.3 and people ask me all the time if I'm having any more.

I find simply saying "no" shuts them up, as they have no idea what to say next.

I'd say 'well I'm not sure about the preganancy but I am planning on punching the next person who asks that' and give thm a big smile.

I have to admit though my first reaction when my friend (who had two kids under three) told me she was pregnant with twins was 'OMG !!' with a quite horrified look on my face. However I know my friend well and she was just as horrifed as me at the time so was not upset in the least.

She of course now adores all 4 children but the twins were definitely a double surprise.

Well cupcakes I'm in the same boat and have come up with the following reply, at the recommendation of Dh, as he was quite shocked at disgusting reactions as well:

offending party: OMG how will you cope?

me: I'm sure I'll cope thank you, I'm an excellent mother and have produced 2 well adjusted, happy children, so I'm obviously doing something right aren't I? (cue v.v.v.smug look)

To the gits who ask 'was it planned?' I reply as follows:

git: oh dear, was it planned?

me: was what planned?

git: the baby!

me: Oh yes, of course this pg is planned, were yours?

So far responses have ranged from slightly uncomfortable to be in front of me to fuming at my smugness.

Dh summed it up nicely I thought, saying if anyone tells you they're pg then the only acceptable reply is CONGRATULATIONS! regardless of how well you think you know the person. They will let you know if they are not happy, but always err on the side of "I'm happy for you" when told.

Personally I've always held that if people aren't pleased to be pg they won't be advertising the fact they are until they've figured out what they will do

cupcakes I am getting this a hell of a lot however I do also only have a very small age gap so can understand the ermm shocked surprise. I have a 2.8yr old and a 6mth old and am 10wks pg.

I had that too with ds3. I also get it when people find out the age gaps between my 3 (19 months and 21 months). Feckin rude

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i have 5.
I am bored to tears of the comments and he is only 4 months old 'is he your first''no my fifth' Picture the scene!'you dont look old enough''do you have a nanny''i bet the older ones help'
Comments then move to 'is that it then' 'hanging up your boots' and more popular'are you going for a football team' Yawn yawn yawn
Four of mine are boys 'you poor thing''how unusual' pitying stares.
wait till i have six - think i will just hide!

I actually got asked whether I am a catholic when I was pg with no 4

how ridiculous!

thats becuase its unseemly to have more than two children in polite society doncha know

think the world things we are always at it - or that i should look like mrs pepperpot

next time tell them your husband has a huge cock - you cant resist.

i am good with the truth!

I overheard a lovely reply to such a question the other day: "Oh, you want to know what contraception we use?" Blush blush stutter stammer...finally the penny dropped and the other woman apologised.

I was actually asked by a midwife on my first visit to the hospital with pregnacy No6 --Do they all have the same father? DH was sat next to me at the time!
Been asked several times if we're catholic, and also if we're trying for a football team,(we have 5 boys & 1 girl).
People on first meeting have asked...
How many bedrooms do you have?
How much do you get in chid benefit!
Has your husband got a well paid job!.....probably thinking large family must be living off the state!..We're not by the way.

The most offensive remarks have been made by family members. MIL & SIL have even used the phrase 'breed like rabbits' about me &dh when we told them I was expecting DS4.

We were Catholic and I can remember a priest saying when we were growing up "so, there's only the four of you, then?". Which it has to be said is the sort of comment you don't hear much in non-Catholic circles .

I quite liked 'is your telly broken?'

got told by a neighbour that there is contraception now a days! when preg with ds4. Just ignore this type of comment. Best wishes xxx

oh it never fails to astonish me how rude people are

honestly

I might start using the telly one. Don't think I could say the giant cock one (although would love to have the nerve to).

Morningpaper - PMSL!!!

I have 4 and get the same comments as NotanOtter (this is me - Rach69 btw -new name!) Why do people (often complete strangers or nodding aquaintences from school) feel the need to ask such personal questions?! The one that really gets me is 'that's enough now isn't it?' which makes me SEETHE! and makes me want to have another one...

I have to say the one that makes me laugh (when said to me by male friend pointing at my bump) is 'have you not worked out what's causing that yet?!'

Personally I think Congratulations should always be your first reaction unless you know something different. I have noticed the most judgemental comments coming from close family and friends and they hurt the most.

If I ever get pregnant with number 3 I would furnish such a question with a considered and accurate response, we've been shagging like bastards for 3.5 yrs (current length of ttc)