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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Just been o see midwife and feel so down could cry

40 replies

Beckmum4 · 04/07/2013 15:40

Iv just been for my 28 week apt and measured 32 weeks
When I asked midwife if this was ok she replied " we'll when there's a lot of mum, and there is a lot of you isn't there"
She weighed me and Iv put on 8lb in the pregnancy is that to much?? I honestly don't know
I mean I know I'm over weight but she knocked my confidence out of me she makes me feel like I'm the fattest mummy to be ever known.
I carnt change the midwife as she's the only one attached to my surgery.
I could cry if I'm honest
:(
Please ladies I'm not after sympathy I just wanted to see what ppl think have I put to much weight on so far ?? 8lb and 28weeks

Thank you

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greenj1 · 04/07/2013 15:42

No that's not much at all, your midwife sounds really insensitive. Big hugs from me, I suggest you have a pampering session now to make you feel better x

greenj1 · 04/07/2013 15:43

Btw a lot of ladies will have put on 20lbs or more by now so 8lbs is nothing!

TinkyPeet · 04/07/2013 15:45

No that's not too much don't let it worry you, yesterday I measured at 46cm. I'm 37 weeks. I'm just having a big baby, the last time I weighed myself, couple of weeks ago I have put on 9kg.
Everybody puts on weight differently and I think your midwife just made a wrong comment. Perhaps she kicked herself for it afterwards. She should have done anyway.
When I was carrying my dd btw I had put on 6stone by 36 weeks.....
Are you feeling ok in yourself otherwise? X

YoniRanger · 04/07/2013 15:50

If it makes you feel any better the doctor who delivered my baby informed me that my bump was mostly fat.

DD was 9lb2

PeterParkerSays · 04/07/2013 15:51

You are supposed t put on just under 2 stone with any pregnancy, with fat reseerves, baby, amniotic fluid etc. 8lbs by now is fine (you put more on towards the end as baby gets bigger).

Personally, I would book to go back and see her. Tell her that she hurt your feelings and ask her about safely losing weight during pregnancy, "as you were concerned about my size at my last appointment" and see what she says.

Cow.

knittingirl · 04/07/2013 15:52

I'd put on 1.5-2st by that point, so 8lbs sounds absolutely fine!

Don't worry, don't let the midwife's comment stress you out, just concentrate on taking good care of yourself and baby :)

Original poster

Beckmum4 · 04/07/2013 15:53

No not really I just feel fat. I asked her if she thought the baby was big and she said no its the right size for weight, just there's a lot of mum.
She said it more than once so I doubt it's a slip up. :( I dread every apt with her if I'm honest

OP posts:

combinearvester · 04/07/2013 15:53

Were you big before the pregnancy? Sounds like she was trying to stop you from worrying about your bump size, bigger women often give birth to big babies...try not to worry what she thinks about your size (unless there is a medical issue). When women are pregnant there will always be someone making personal comments - it is bloody annoying but either learn to make a joke about it or give her the deathstare...don't take the upset home.

combinearvester · 04/07/2013 15:55

Btw there is no 'supposed to' amount of weight gain for pregnancy...if you are obese before the pregnancy it is possible to not gain weight in pregnancy through healthy eating without harming the baby. One of my friends stayed the same weight the entire time, after the baby was born she had actually lost weight.

akuabadoll · 04/07/2013 16:02

Hi, I'm 24 weeks and have put on 12lb. The normal weight range is dependant on your starting BMI though, I'm the lower end of normal BMI so a bit more gain would be normal. If you wish you could your own details here then you can see what is relevant for you.

TinkyPeet · 04/07/2013 16:07

Then she just sounds like a nobber. Don't let her get to you, concentrate on how you feel about yourself and if you can do anything more to make yourself feel better rather than what anyone else thinks x

littlemslazybones · 04/07/2013 16:13

When the midwife weighed me at my booking in appointment and wrote down the result I mentioned that I'd put on weight, I meant since conception but she looked at me pitifully and said, "well, that happens when we get old".

I'm 32, bitch.

oohdaddypig · 04/07/2013 16:19

Dear god I don't like the sound of your midwife.

Poor you. I put on 2.5 stone each pregnancy - so way more than you at your stage. I lost it both times within 9 months.

I would ask to see a different MW tbh and tell the practice why.

Congratulations btw.

bringmeroses · 04/07/2013 16:26

8lb is nothing!! Shesoyndsswful. I've heard so many stories of midwives coming out with insensitive or just plain wrong things - a friend was told her baby was going to be huge so she scrapped her home birth and - baby turned out to be perfectly normal size.

3Caramel · 04/07/2013 16:26

Poor you! 8lbs sounds on the lighter end of normal, so please don't worry about it. She's clearly having an off day, so should be ignored.

I'm 28 wks and have (thanks to dear Cadburys & Ben & Jerrys) put on 10kg already... Now that's alot! But am not worried - if you weren't over-weight to start with, then you put on what you put on. The thing that matters is that you look after yourself (i.e. eat!) and the baby.

How're you feeling at 28wks? I can't believe there's only 2months (or so) to go!

bringmeroses · 04/07/2013 16:27

She sounds awful! Must be the gin...

TinkyPeet · 04/07/2013 16:42

Oh dear lord 3caramel I read that wrong and thought cadburys and Ben & jerrys had merged.....got a bit excited!!! Hah! Wishful!
bringmeroses

BerthaTheBogCleaner · 04/07/2013 16:51

Is there another doctors that you could get to? You can change surgeries.

welshfirsttimemummy · 04/07/2013 16:53

I put on 2 stone during my pregnancy, don't worry about it

Franykins · 04/07/2013 17:01

Oh I'm dreading my next app then! I am 18+6 with twins, but have put on at least a stone already I am gonna be massive!

toffeem · 04/07/2013 18:03

I would be really happy with 8lbs. I'm 34 weeks and put 2 1/2 stone on already!

IWipeArses · 04/07/2013 18:12

I didn't put anything on when pregnant, which is good cos I'm obese. I know I'm obese, everyone knows I'm obese, no one was mean about it, it was just a fact.
So if you're overweight, then you're overweight. That in itself is not a judgement on you. It can affect how you measure, which is what you asked about. It sounds like she could have been more sensitive to how you reacted to it though.

mynameisnotmichaelcaine · 04/07/2013 18:23

She sounds really insensitive. If you were to complain though, she would probably say she was trying to reassure you. If you naturally carry weight on your tummy, then some of your measurement will be you, rather than baby. I am very fortunate, and have always had a very slim tummy, so I am measuring bang on for dates. However, if human beings were to carry their babies in their bottoms, I would DEFINITELY be measuring too big!

Futterby · 04/07/2013 18:31

She sounds awful :( if it helps, I'm 19 weeks and when I weighed myself last week, I've put on 15lbs. I was stunned, everything except my belly is slimmer so I didn't think I would have put on much but I have. 8lbs is nothing :)

Ginderella · 04/07/2013 18:58

What a b*h! 8lbs is nothing!! I would decline any further appointments with her. I would also refuse to be weighed again. I put on over 5 stone when I was pregnant. My arse was the size of a planet! My DS was 7lbs and perfect. Don't worry. Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

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