PG after MC - posifrickentivity, hand holding, and smelly gush.

[IBelieveInPink]

Thread for ladies who are freaking out panicking slightly when preggy after miscarriage.
Plenty of oldies. Newbies always welcome.

Goodness I cant keep up with you guys.

Jess I really feel for you. Hospitals suck. They are hot and smelly. I bet Wed cant come any faster.

Congrats to new peoples - camomiles and postman and anyone else I missed. We are quite the little community now.

Fab news on the scan Janie - my baby was in a bad position too and pics were rubbish. Consultant is doing me an extra scan at 26 weeks (i know I am spoiled) but gonna have to try and stop him doing 4d on me without offending him - I dont like the idea of it.

Pink I have been getting those pains too -esp when I am walking - was a good excuse to skip zumba. I have also realised after sunday lunch I cant eat three course meals anymore - trouble is I only realise this 10 mins after eating so will prob keep doing it.

Currently "reading french children don't throw food" like it is the bible. Thoroughly recommend and it is an easy read as one persons experience, and reads more like a novel. Now decided I am doing everything the french way. my child will sleep through the night from 3 months, and eat all its vegetables and be genearally angelic as long as I do everything this book says! (perhaps there is a bit of wishful thinking here!!). Going to force DH to read it too so we are working from the same page.

So going to do an NCT course - one that has classes before and after baby is born. I am slightly confused - do I still need to go to antenatal classes with the NHS? Do I need to book these now? no one has ever said anything to me. I think because I am a member of staff they assume I know all this stuff.

bod no you don't have to do the NHS ones too but you could if you wanted to :)
My SIL is french and neither my niece or my nephew are angelic! Bloody lovely but not angels - perhaps its the anglo genes from my brother

Ha ha Pink I was wondering about that hypno malarky too!

Bod the midwife didnt mention the NHS antenatal until I was 30+ weeks. I'll be honest - they weren't that great. Didn't have the cash to do NCT but kind of wish we had anyway. The group was v large, the midwife v annoying, and there wasn't much useful stuff. Someone said about breathing earlier-werent taught anything about it, they just made DH look like a plum by getting him to role play being in labour...he wasn't impressed!

Janie I think... Intrigued by your co sleeping cot???? What is it? I breastfed DD and just had her in a Moses basket then crib by the bed. One bit of useful advice that someone gave me was to get a low watt bulb in a lamp near your bedside to try and stop you from being wide awake every feed! Worked for me, DD wanted feeding every 2 hours for first 10 weeks, although in hind sight I was only giving her one boob each time and as she was getting bigger I should have probably offered the other one too.

Jess sounds terrible but really not long now, very excited for you. Fingers and toes crossed that Weds goes exactly how you want it to X

Ooh la la - not heard of this angelic French child thing either! Must have been where I went wrong . I remember buying a Gina Ford book whilst pregnant with DD as people kept banging on about her. Read 3 pages then binned her! Crazy organised woman, no hope of me being that regimented!

Honestly it's a revelation. Nothing regiments at all. Just about not over parenting, leaving kids to it etc

Bod - you have already sold me on it! Amazon will be delivering later this week. :)

Hang on - first timer here, one boob is not enough for babies? They want to feed from both, each feed? Omg, I have so much to learn!

P.s. how freakin hot is it tonight?!

Pink yay, I have a recruit. I am boiling hot! Had a rubbish nights sleep last night too. Just covered myself in bio oil which is making me even hotter!

Very hot here too! Phew! I like the unregimented book idea! I read the baby whisperer last time and I got so stressed when DS didn't do as the silly book said! best place in the bin!!! Hypnobirthing from what I understand is deep relaxation and visualisation to help with a calm, raxed and natural birth. I suffer from anxiety and hoping it will help. I feel quite inspired but am aware to lots of people it would just be mumbo jumbo! Lol. With DS birth I had a little gas and air at the end but feel I did naturally a lot of what the hypnobirthing book describes! We only want two children so want to enjoy the experience as much as possible.
Re the cot ('twas me Garden worm) it's a cot with no side that sits right next to your bed like co sleeping but safe. DS never settled in a Moses basket and those early months of. Feast feeding killed me! Can't face it again! We have Ds currently in a cot bed but be not keep on having a new bed and we would need a new matress anyway so am considering a cot that can use for a couple of years. Oh the decisions!

• breast feeding not feast!

Hmm... Would like a read of that French book to see if it makes any sense as my daughter is a bloody madam maybe if I'd brought her up like the French, she wouldn't be (is that the aim?!)

Thanks for birthday wishes pentagon! Xxx

Happy birthday DIY and Blackholes or I should say Joyeux anniversaire since we're on the French theme!

I'm really interested to read that book Bod, esp to see what it is they do culturally that we don't, I'm a French teacher so it'll be especially interesting! Plus the tips may be useful by the sounds of f it. Although like bump, I know some French children who are certainly not angels! The only book I've read so far was a Gina Ford one which frightened me so much that as per what Garden said, was quickly discarded!

Morning all and congrats to all the newbies :-D Its a scary time but the support on here is fabulous and remember that today you are pregnant.

My book recommendation is Baby Love by Robin Barker. What I think is so fab about it is that it doesn't take one particular technique/parenting style, but instead tells you about all of them. So for example, in the sleep section, it goes through controlled crying but very much "if you want to try this, this is how you do it" but also goes through lots of other techniques too. She's very much an advocate of it being your decision and you having to work out what is right for you and passes no judgement!! Even my sceptic DH used to consult it!

My other god-send was the gro-light Amazon - still use it now as a night light for DC1, and you can adjust the light so its bright (for nappy changes or dark (when you're dozing and trying to feed!!)

I thought it was cooler last night - in our garrett attic bedroom, there was actually a bit of a breeze, so slept like a baby.

Trying to work out if DC1 has the pox or heat rash. The rash fades overnight and gets worse in the day, and none of the spots have blistered (first appeared on Sunday). Anyone know? (Mum doesn't know if I had chicken pox, so trying to work out both whether to keep her out of nursery and whether I need to panic)

Hello ladies,

I wondered if I could have some hand holding/advice. I'm 6 weeks today and I saw my GP 2 weeks ago who said she would request a scan asap and I would get an appointment 'in a few weeks'.

I called the surgery today and the woman booking in the scans said 'sorry we're really busy, you won't get one until beginning August'. Well I'll be nearly 12 weeks then anyway!!

It's just bringing back the appalling care I got when mc'ing. I had to wait 5 days to get a scan and confirm I was MC'ing as they were 'so busy' and I feel like I'm about to get shit care all over again. I suffer from anxiety so this feeling of being out of control is awful. My GP was so caring when I saw her but it just seems like she's stuck in the system too.

I'm currently trying to leave a message to ask if my GP can escalate things but all the lines are busy . I guess I'll go private if I can't get one as I need to know my body isn't just growing a useless empty sac again like last time...

Welcome & Congratulations Cam & Postman!

Jess, eeek! Almost babytime, hope you're having a restful day today (and they don't have the heating on) and I'll be keeping everything crossed for you tomorrow.

((Guff)) Sorry they can't arrange a scan for you...and that their care was so awful last time.
I would go for a private one, if you suffer from anxiety the waiting (and trying to arrange one/chasing GP) is going to be awful for you.

My 7wk private scan cost me £60 & was reassuring, if you're near Kent I recommend the place I had it done.
I have a scan booked for 37wks with them! That's in two weeks

*Santa, if it's fading overnight could it just be prickly heat/heat rash?
DS has Keratosis pilaris google images linky which is just a posh name for reddish pimples on his arms/legs/cheeks...they get worse when he's sweaty so he's been naked for most of this week.

This baby has turned (has been breech until Sunday) & I no longer look or feel pregnant!? Aside from the kicks (and this bloody heat) I feel fantastic, WTF!?

guff sorry they're being rubbish with the scans. If I were you I'd book a private one if you can afford it, and then you have a date and one less thing to worry about.

gary I can remember feeling great at the end and feeling a complete fraud being on maternity leave. Was mowing the lawn and walking 3 miles the day before going into hospital at 40w (had an elcs as dd was breech and refused to turn), was a complete shock to not even be able to walk up the stairs properly a few days later.

I'd quite like to read that book too pink, might see if I can request it from the library. But I've learned from experience that books are only good for inspiration and a few ideas, babies completely have their own minds right from the start and really there's only so much you can change. Some sleep well, some don't, some like throwing food, some don't, some cry lots, some don't, and whatever, it's not your fault!

gary that is fantastic! Must be a relief that the baby is heading the right way now

guff if you have the money then go private. I had an empty sac too and I think an early scan is really useful in this scenario, I had a scan at about 9 weeks and found it very reassuring. Is there another hospital or a mw led unit you could transfer your care to?

diy I agree about babies having their own mind's. DD's personality was evident from birth!

santa that book sounds good, so many of them are so very extreme! I ended up reading a lot of attachment parenting ones as DD was adamant she was cosleeping and spending a lot of time in a sling. I found them quite sanctimonious tbh. That rash doesn't sound like CP to me, the fading in the night bit would suggest heat rash, CP gets a lot more itchy at night.

Good luck jess :) not long now!

I have come home from work as I feel a bit odd, not ill exactly but not quite right, I have never fainted in my life but I might be a buy fainty, DD didn't sleep well last night so could just be exhaustion :(

guff a lot of PCTs won't give early scans unless you've had 3+ mcs, which is shite, but that's just the way it is. I couldn't get one even after 2 (despite my GP saying he would - he obviously didn't know the system). I would also recommend a private scan - I found one for £70 so they don't have to be uber-expensive.

Thanks gary - they're not blistering, so I reckon its either prickly heat or some other random post-viral rash. And they had her top off at nursery yesterday and didn't send her home, so its not like I'm hiding anythign from them. Enjoy feeling good though - do you think that the baby has not just turned but also engaged and therefore taken a load of pressure off your internal organs?

BumpKitty - sorry to hear you are feeling unwell. I feel the same and had the day off today. Think a combination of heat and not sleeping well. How many weeks are you?
Happy birthday DIY and Blackholes :) have a nice day.
Guff - Sorry to hear that you cant get an NHS scan. I also suffer anxiety and had a scan at 6+ weeks and they couldn't find a heart beat. Was a horrid two week wait for a re scan where all seemed ok. I would adviser booking a private scan if you can afford it and waiting until around 8+ weeks. I have found breathing exercises good for the anxiety.
Gary - Glad your feeling good :) enjoy!
Santa - My Ds had the chickenpox about a month ago and they quickly blistered every few days for about a week.

Hi to everyone else and welcome to the newcomers.

Guff - sorry they are being so unhelpful. It's not nice is it. I went in crying when I was pg this time after 2 mc, and they 'couldn't do anything'. I booked in a private scan at 9 weeks, so worth it.

Has anyone else read this? So funny.... (sorry on my phone so dont know how to link)
m.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-23226216

Good luck for tomorrow jess it will be forgotten once the baby is here safe and sound

janie I've gone for the Maggie Howell book and it all seems to make sense before, having been thru labour before I can see the benefits.

pink no one has raised any eyebrows to my face but I think they just think (and me) it can't hurt and if it makes it better than last time it will be worth the effort, I think it's gonna take a lot of input from me and also DH tho tbh so if you are not committed (and I wouldn't have been last time at all) then maybe just get the relaxation/breathing tips online before spending any money

Re parenting books...offering a different view I haven't read anything (just looked things up if anything was worrying me) and gone by instinct/advice from friends and family and it's been brill

santa am defo getting a grolight when DS is older

Sorry to hear they won't scan you earlier Guff, it's really shit and leaves you more weeks to worry, they wouldn't allow me an earlier scan either as you have to have 3mc to get an early scan!
You could have a private scan if it puts your mind to rest, obviously money permitting-i couldn't afford one so waited anxiously, glad all was ok when i finally got to my 12wk scan!

Got to hear baby's heartbeat for first time today at the mw app, was well chuffed as i'm only 14 weeks!
Has spurned me on to buy a doppler

Had the most boring day at work today and left my phone at home so I couldn't even catch up with you all!

Jess I hope there are no emergency c sections at your hospital tomorrow and you are first in the q! Can't wait to hear your news x

Hope those who were feeling sick today are ok now they are chilling at home - oh to be rich ladies what do lunch....

Like the sound of the French book just wish I had time to read it! First time mummy's seriously I know people blah on about things never being the same etc but make the most of these few months with just you and DH's....it changes for the better honest!

Pink yeah breast feeding was a bit of a mystery to me too and at the very start one boob is plenty if not too much but there comes a point when topping up with number two can be required

Happy Birthday fellow cancerians, diy and blackholes? (sorry if thats the wrong people!)

Guff if you can go private then do. I had 1 for £60 in Kent too and it was well worth it. X

Oops congrats pumpkin on hearing heartbeat - awesome isn't it? X

Ooops, missed the birthdays! Happy Birthday diy & Blackholes!

pumpkin, hurrah for hearing a hb!

Bump, hope you're feeling better now?

Have just ordered a moses basket, (travel) cot & rocker/swing thing for baby.
PIL had stored DS's swing & moses basket in their loft but the swing had mold/mould (sp?) growing on it, so didn't want to risk there being mould spores on the moses basket, DH thinks IBU about this. I'd rather not risk it.
Kiddiecare have 15% off orders over £100 until midnight tomorrow if anyone is looking at ordering stuff soon!