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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnant (IVF) Worriers (part two)

999 replies

Shazzamattazzerly · 02/06/2013 17:11

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others! We have filled our first thread (www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/1721178-Pregnant-IVF-Worriers) but there is more worrying to do so here we are.

A few of us graduated from the IVF thread (link below) and are having a go at our own thread to get out of the other IVF-ers hair! So get your roomy jogging bottoms on for some virtual hand holding, mutual symptom spotting and staying sane until the next scan date.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1691674-Excellent-Egg-Buddies-continued-Anyone-having-IVF-ICSI-in-Jan-Feb-and-March-2013-please-join-us

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ceara · 03/07/2013 17:11

fairy it is natural to worry about about work handover as we are all decent and conscientious people. But you seem to have an enlightened employer and honestly, succession planning is your line manager's responsibility though of course you want to leave things in good order. Tying up what loose ends you can and a comprehensive set of handover notes (started early and added to over your final weeks) should be fine and will help your successor get up and running - ready to hand over to her own maternity covet in due course!

dildals my DH routinely tells me my bum looks big. Motherly curves would honestly be a compliment from him :-)

Mariana good god, HOW long??

shazz, thank you for the information about the DVD. I wasn't expecting such luxuries. Their whole package really is amazing value, especially for the level of professional skill and care you receive.

juicy, great news, it is mad that feeling sick can make you happy but that is the topsy turvy reality of this roller coaster, isn't it?

SpottyDotty1 · 03/07/2013 18:30

juicy sorry no but congrats on your HCG levels, always a relief when they go up :)

ceara I shall be on a the drugs for some time yet, I start weaning at different stages, looking forward to the end of the progesterone though :) but I can understand the feeling about going solo without the stabilisers I am 10w2d so will be 12w4d when I have my scan. So you were impressed with FMC?? I am thinking of going there for my 20 week scan

Would be nice if the weather did improve Hmm no summer holiday planned which means which means we have to make do with whatever happens here

shazza I too wondered about naming the twins, first one out etc, i will go into early labour if they found my replacement before I left, its not in their nature to think that far ahead, I think you also went to FMC didn't you??

Well I am supposed to be cleaning while he is cooking :) so better get back to it

MarianaTrench · 04/07/2013 02:28

Spotty that's great - hope you're enjoying a day or so of reassurance. It's hard reaching and surpassing the point of previous losses - yet another difficulty to deal with.

Good levels, juicy, hope that makes you feel better too.

I've never been there but have only heard good things about the FMC, Nikolaides and the research they do. Even from my NHS consultant although she dissuaded me from going there as she said I'd get as good care on the NHS, but I was lucky to be a patient of an extremely good consultant at an extremely good hospital.

After the feeding marathon earlier she's just had a 20 minute feed. That's more like it. To be fair I could have detached her this afternoon but we were both comfortable on the sofa, I'm sure half the time she was dozing and comfort feeding but DD1 was at nursery so it didn't matter. It's all calories burned though which must be good for the size of my womanly arse, pity about the Galaxy I then ate to compensate.

ceara · 04/07/2013 07:10

spotty I have been impressed so far by the FMC and their reputation is excellent. My choice to go there does not reflect on the quality of the care I believe my local hospital provides. However, for the chromosomal disorders screening, I believe the FMC will be able to give us a more accurate risk assessment, not least because of the Harmony test which of course the NHS don't yet offer. This was important to us. Moreover, we will have the results a good 2 weeks before the NHS's results would come through, and the waiting is excruciating enough without prolonging things.

I was also attracted by the opportunity for more scans, of course :-) I have not spotted badly enough for the EPU to bother with me, knowing as they did from my IVF scans that the pregnancy was in the right place. Which is fair play as there are better uses for the resources. However, as a paranoid IVFer I would have gone insane long before the first NHS scan at 13 weeks, hence gritting my teeth and "going private".

I'm not sure I would go to the FMC at 20 weeks, if we are lucky enough to get that far, but I would definitely consider the 32 week scan there if the pregnancy has gone well enough that the NHS criteria aren't triggered.

Shazzamattazzerly · 04/07/2013 15:10

Hello ladies

I'm on the bumpiest bus in the world to my scan. Shazlett must be wondering what on earth is going out out here.

Cutest thing ever though, the little girl behind me had just said' I love you mummy' to her mum. I'm welling up.

Juicy congrats on your hcg levels. I don't know anything about indicative levels. Could that be high enough for 2 do you think?

Ceara well done for stopping the drugs. Another milestone passed. It is a worry but your body will take care of everything. It is marvellous. I was also enticed by extra scans, I had 5 before 13 weeks! I'm so nervous about this one. I hope it goes as well as the others.

Spotty yes I did go to FMC. I'm having my 20 week scan with NHS but think ill go back to FMC for a final one if I don't get another NHS one. I don't want to know the sex though so the more I have now the more I risk finding out or accidentally seeing something on the screen.

Mariana womanly arse? Motherly curves seems to be the coined phrase now Winkglad trenchlet has stopped the feedathon. I hadn't thought about calorie burning. I'll have shazlett locked on for hours. Maybe I could get a slendertone and give my abs a workout at the same time Grin

More later once I've checked in with the Pip. Fingers crossed.

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Shazzamattazzerly · 04/07/2013 15:28

Oh I forgot to say I think I saw my tummy move today. I wear a pass on a lanyard around my neck and it jumped up slightly as my belly moved. I'm 21+1 is it too soon for outward kicks?

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ExpatAl · 04/07/2013 15:35

[Message edited by MNHQ to remove reference to name-changing]

Don't well up on the bus Shazza. You'll look like a mad lady.
Best of luck - enjoy!

Great news about your hcg Juicy and scan Ceara.

Keep, I find if I sit up straight and lean slightly forward I tend to tip out more pee. I've had a big head on my bladder for the last few weeks and have a constant horrible feeling of pressure. Hayfever is a nightmare at the moment - after about the 3rd sneeze I have to stand still and really concentrate to avoid a catastrophe!

This thread moves too fast to keep up with. Hope everyone is well and coping with the heat.

Dildals · 04/07/2013 17:32

expat had to grin at your hayfever comment, I have the same thing where I go 'OH sneeze coming, FOCUS and CLINCH those muscles!

Shazzamattazzerly · 04/07/2013 18:28

All fine here. She said baby looks perfect. Phew! We looked away when she studied 'down below' and she referred to shazlett as baby throughout. Its funny not to know but im glad we decided not to. It was different to the other scans much harder to make out bits cause you can't see it all at once anymore. The dr wasn't worried though and said they I don't need any more scans unless the midwife detects any problems later on.
I'm so relieved and can't believe that next time I see shazlett she will be out in the big wide world. She was moving loads. its amazing that I can't feel all those movements.

Thanks for all the good wishes.

Laughing about the sneezing. And desperately squeezing the pelvic floor at the same time Smile

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MarianaTrench · 04/07/2013 18:40

Brilliant news shazz. So glad everything is perfect, and a will of steel not to ask the sex! Yes, 20 weeks does feel like a hell of a long time to go without another scan.

Al, I'm sneezing away too but have noticed a dramatic improvement in pelvic floor after only 11 weeks, in that I don't really think about it anymore, so it does recover.

ceara · 04/07/2013 20:58

shazz that's brilliant news. Well done to you and shazlett. I am marvelling at your self-discipline over not finding out the sex.

SweetieTime · 04/07/2013 21:52

Shazza so pleased all was well at the scan. Amazing that next time you see shazlett will be in the big wide world. Were you nervous in the run up to the scan? You came across very calm.

Dildals · 04/07/2013 23:39

shazza excellent news on the scan!

JuicyFatSteak · 05/07/2013 08:54

Shazz, excellent news on your scan Smile

Can anybody remember being 5 weeks pregnant? You know how nauseous I have been due to my very high hCG levels, well I haven't felt sick in 36 hours. Do I have anything to worry about? I'm still massively tired with very swollen breasts but I recently read the tiredness is probably down to progesterone pessaries Sad

Sorry to sound like a worry wart.

Shazzamattazzerly · 05/07/2013 09:33

Hello ladies

Thanks for the kind words. I'm working from home today cause my back is still very painful. The midwife last night told me to rest otherwise I could end up with something much worse. She told us scare stories about pregnant women having to walk on crutches or wear special belts throughout their pregnancy so I'm being good for once and am going to rest all weekend.

Sweetie I was very nervous and swung from having nightmares about holes in hearts, cleft palates and diaphragmatic hernias (I saw that on one born every minute) to thinking that of course everything would be ok. I've been so lucky up til now I just pray it continues.

Juicy symptoms definitly come and go. I can't tell you the number of times I googled 'no symptoms at 5, 6,7 etc weeks'. You like your juicy red meats don't you?Smile

Re not knowing the sex of shazlett. DP was adamant so there was no way I could know and keep it a secret. It does feel funny cause on here I call shazlett 'she' and in RL we usually say 'he'. But I'm not sure if knowing would mean I would fret more or less. I feel that I need to trust shazlett and my body to get on with the job in hand now. They both know what to do so I'm just going to rest more, keep on top of my nutrition and try to enjoy the second half.

Have a good day. X

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fairypangolin · 05/07/2013 10:00

shazza so glad the scan went well. I hope you can relax a bit now and enjoy being pregnant. Definitely look after your back. I've started working from home on Fridays just so I can get a different chair to sit in and not have to get to work and back. It feels much more restful. Mind you on a day like this I am severely tempted just to go and sit in the garden and read a book.

juicy my GP told me that hormones are released in bursts and your body will initially react strongly to them and then get accustomed. So it's normal for symptoms to wax and wane and it does not mean that there's anything wrong. It may be that you had an initial reaction to the very quick increase in HCG but that has abated or slowed a bit. It is more common to feel nausea later on, from week 6 or so.

expat and dildals "FOCUS and CLINCH" pretty well says it all.

keep ceara you're completely right about work of course. But I work for a very small company where everyone is pretty well responsible for their own files. I am afraid if my replacement isn't properly trained and prepared she will quit and then when I come back a big mess will be left for me (or worse that I will be pestered through mat leave with those issues). Also, i'm only entitled to the pittance that is statutory maternity pay and I want to be able to present a plausible case to my boss that i am worth more than that and therefore the company should top it up. If I were to say well I'm in my rights to leave and just go it would be harder to do that. I'm the only employee who's ever gone on mat leave twice (and only one other ever went on mat leave ever!) so we don't really have systems set up to deal with it.

JuicyFatSteak · 05/07/2013 10:09

Fairy & Shazz, I very much appreciate that info about waxing & waning.

Shazz, yes, I'm a complete meat freak Wink

Shazzamattazzerly · 05/07/2013 12:14

Hi juicy yes I forgot my acupuncturist said the same as fairy's dr. That ideally your body desks with the extra hormones and makes adjustments accordingly.

Thanks fairy. I'm enjoying the peace of working from home but it is hard knowing that I have to rest all weekend and miss out on sunshine. Sadly we have no garden and I'm not sure I'd make it up to Streatham common even though its not far. I'm going to cheer myself up by finishing my crochet projects this weekend and enjoy having all the windows open.

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ceara · 05/07/2013 12:17

juicy my GP said much the same as fairy's about fluctuating symptoms. But it is so hard when we are focussing so closely on our bodies and trying to read the runes in each tiny change or twinge. I am not the best source on early pregnancy symptoms, though, as mine have been pretty uniformly unimpressive to date (11 weeks now, so yes I still remember!)

On a slightly different note, I know your betas have been high so you may be cheered by some research which I read at 5 weeks and gained, ooh, a couple of hours reassurance from :-)

Www.mycoyfertility.com/rbonline1.PDF

This looks at day 14 betas as a prognostic indicator of viable pregnancy. Obviously not something you want to read if your betas are low (been there after my first cycle and the embryo only stayed with us a few days), but working backwards from your high day 18 results, I guess your day 14 beta would have been well over 300 ie off the top end of the scale. According to the research, those levels give you really great odds of a viable pregnancy, as well as a 60% probability it's twins... My beta at day 14 post national EC was well over 200 (with definitely only one in there as I only had a single frozen blastocyst transferred) and I know I found the encouraging stats temporarily helped me manage my insanity. (At least until I hit 6 weeks, still wasn't sick and started spotting, but that's another issue :-) .) Of course, statistics like these are only of limited help to us when we have become accustomed always to being in the small percentages ourselves and our BFPs against-the-odds are testament to that. But it might be a comforting and hopeful thought for 5 minutes or so :-)

fairy fully understand and your commitment and professionalism are a credit to you. I am a small cog in a big wheel myself (though will still worry about my files, because I care). But my DH works for a small third sector organisation so I can imagine how much harder it is for you in a small company. I think at some point though, you have got to wrestle your conscience into a box, sit on the lid hard, and put yourself and the little one first. It sounds as though you are doing all you should and can to prepare for maternity leave with your work left in good order, and I guess keeping the issue of training and hand over on the radar is the best you can do now. You sound a great employee and colleague, I hope they value you accordingly!

ceara · 05/07/2013 12:19

Notional not national .. Ignorant ill-educated phone :-)

JuicyFatSteak · 05/07/2013 13:32

Ceara, thank you so much for such a detailed reassurance - I feel much better. My betas are indeed high - 1374 at 13dp5dt and 2751 at 15 days past - and the sickness has returned an hour ago with a certain ferocity! Smile

Thanks again to you all.

JuicyFatSteak · 05/07/2013 13:34

Ceara, It's a little reassuring to know I'm 'only' six weeks behind you. Everyone else seems so advanced on here!

Shazzamattazzerly · 05/07/2013 13:55

Goodness knows how I got to 21 weeks though juicy. 5 minutes ago I swear I was 5 weeks worrying the same as you Smile

I promise that in 15 weeks time you will be saying the same to a new person who has joined us and I'll be about to drop Smile

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Dildals · 05/07/2013 14:38

juicy the only real consistent symptom I had was waking up early to go for a wee. Sore breasts came and went, and I had only marginal MS, probably more in my head more than anything. And I ended up with twinnos, which apparently is double the hormones.

SweetieTime · 05/07/2013 17:41

juicy I have been very lucky to have very few symptoms as yet. My sore boobs came and went. I noticed my pee went a darker colour regardless of my fluid intake and I was much thirstier than usual. I also had really vivid dreams. I also had cramps near my hip bones and was totally convinced af was on the way or I had an ectopic. am now nearly 15 weeks with twinnys so not that far in front of you either

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