Pregnant (IVF) Worriers (part two)

[Shazzamattazzerly]

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others! We have filled our first thread (www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/1721178-Pregnant-IVF-Worriers) but there is more worrying to do so here we are.

A few of us graduated from the IVF thread (link below) and are having a go at our own thread to get out of the other IVF-ers hair! So get your roomy jogging bottoms on for some virtual hand holding, mutual symptom spotting and staying sane until the next scan date.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1691674-Excellent-Egg-Buddies-continued-Anyone-having-IVF-ICSI-in-Jan-Feb-and-March-2013-please-join-us

Hi ladies

Just a quick one from me to say buzz am really pleased that things are ok with you. Seeing a heartbeat must have been such a relief. I am really pleased for you and the buzzbean.

shazza 3rd August is ok for me too.

Will do a proper post in a day or so. My bed is calling tonight !

Noks x

Hello girls

Expat your friend and her twins sound delightful. I love the fact that visitors are involved. I looked at the maxi. Looks good. MN reviews said that it wouldn't be good for those who live in a flat though. What do you think?

MrsH what a lot of loot! How exciting. What pram did you get? I'm obsessed at the moment!

Sweetie amazing news re scan. What a relief. And how lovely to be able to share your news with your friends and family.

Mariana you are my inspiration. I've decided not to worry about it anymore. It will be a huge adventure and reading your positive posts makes me excited to meet my shazlett. Great organisation tips. I'm going to need to train DP

Nokity Noks you ok? Only 2 sleeps til scan.

So the 3rd August is on for the London meet up. Does anyone have any preferences about where to meet? Last time we met in covent garden cause Fairy was coming in from the north. Fairy can you make the 3rd?

I've got the big guns coming in on Thursday to get the decorating marathon started. A whole week with my parents helping is enough to drive me to drink but I'm going to stay calm and remember that it is all in a good cause. There is so much to do we can't do it on our own. There's no way we can start to accumulate baby stuff while the flat is in this state. I'm excited to get it sorted. It's going to be cool once it's all done. I'll host a tea party at mine once we are on mat leave.

Morning all!

Yay to 3 August! Somewhere central or south London based would be good for me. Looking forward to meeting you all in RL.

buzz so pleased they found a heartbeat. Must be frustrating not knowing what's causing the bleeding, as well as incredibly scary. Hang in there - it sounds like mini B is a survivor.

shazz I'm super impressed at the decorating. We need to get our arses into gear and get some done this summer. The problem is motivating Mr Gin!

I too am buggy obsessed and keep gawping at them when I pass one in the street! FIL has a which subscription, so he'll be put into action researching them for us after the 20 week scan.

didals I would not be happy if we constantly had people to stay. I feel that at the mo I really need my space and time to just slob out (plus I keep falling asleep on the sofa at 9pm!). It sounds like your DH is lovely and hospitable, but maybe a chat about how you need some time with him may help? My DH and I haven't had much quality time recently, as I'm constantly knackered and in bed or asleep! Shazz's advice was v wise.

How do you f'ind out about nearly new sales?! Your haul sounds great, as does mrshys. I gave in and bought some cute muslin squares the other day. I suspect once I know the gender, I'll go nuts!

mariana impressive organisation! Sounds like it's the key to not being overwhelmed with stuff.

sweetie hurrah for a good scan! And wow sounds like they are big uns! Do they ignore the dating scan and stick with the original DD? I know my hospital stick with the one we got from ET.

Well done on having made the buggy decision expat. I'm totally overwhelmed by the choice. I need a search like you get for insurance, where I can tick what specs I want and it then tells me what to get!

Waves to everyone else. Nothing to report. I wore a soft cup non wired bra yesterday and have the sorest boobs ever today! It was meant to be comfortable... So I'm back in the underwiring today. We're off on hols next week and I can't wait. I intend to be sooo lazy.

Anywhere is fine with me :)

buzzy Good news, I had a couple of bleeds too that scared me senseless of course, at the last EPU scan I was crying too with relief and the sonographer said 'look at them, completely unaware of all your worries' ...

Hi all

Sorry I've been so quiet. I carried on having the occasional tiny specks of brown spotting after my 7 week scan so have been keeping my head down and holding my breath some more. I have booked a private scan for next week, when I will be 9 and a bit weeks if all is still well, to find out what is happening. So many people have told me how they bled and still had happy outcomes so I am tying to hang on to my sanity for now, though some days better than others.

Buzzy, great news you are both still hanging in there. So unfair you are being put through the mill like this.

Very impressed by all the exercising and healthy stuff that is going on - I feel very shamed! And by the great bargain-hunting. Something for me to look forward to if/when I get that far.

Hope everyone is doing OK. Sorry too tired for more - having complained of lack of symptoms, the mischief gods were listening and knackerdness and evening retching kicked in on the dot of 7 weeks!

Hope everybody is well.

I think it's one in four or five women have bleeding of some sort and of them only a quarter actually miscarry.

Decorating is such a drag but far better to do it before rather than after the baby is here. I was so mental this time I wouldn't do it and now have three weeks to get it done as I have a big family weekend to host and need that room done so it can be used.

I wish that 5.30 was not the new 7.30 in my house. Luckily my mum is staying so I have help.

Hello girls
All fine here. I'm extremely tired though. I'm hoping I'll have more energy soon. Parental unit arrives tomorrow to kick off decorating.
Hello Ceara. I'm sorry you have had a worrying time. I hope the next scan is ok

Glad you have a bit of help Mariana. I hope you can rest abit.

I feel like it's ages since the 12 week scan and I've got another 2 weeks til 20 week one.

Have a good day. X

Hi, any thoughts? I have dullish pain v low. What is this? Ligaments stretching, have I pulled sth, or is it worrying (it doesn't feel like uterus, too low). Should I fret more

Shaz, two weeks will fly.

Ceara and buzz hope you're both ok.

Will catch up mire tomorrow.

Don't fret keep. It's ligaments stretching.

I hate to say this keep but I had that as part of the whole pelvic girdle strain. It's nothing worrying though but you might be starting to get pregnancy weight related issues.

shazz, I think it only seems like last week you had your 12 week scan - other people's pregnancies fly by!

Yes It's amazing how quickly everyone else is moving along so fast while my pregnancy seems to be taking forever!

Mariana, 5.30 starts with toast and feeding baby sounds really cosy. Am I delusional?

Shazza, I think perhaps the maxi has changed since those reviews as they're quite old. I don't know why it would be unsuitable for a flat unless you don't have a lift but all the travel systems seemed similarly hefty. The folding glitch seems to be fixed too as you don't need to take the wheels off. But then again I haven't used it yet....

But I've only put on 2-3kg so far Mariana...

I know, I keep getting jealous when I read of other people getting to x weeks, then have to remind myself I'm plodding on too! Time is the weirdest thing.

Sadly the toast is only a fantasy! I do take a flask of tea to bed with me though (more evidence of control freakery / obsessive organising!)

Al, it's sometimes to do with the hormones (relaxin specifically) that loosen up your ligaments in your pelvis and elsewhere so it's not always directly weight related. Hopefully it's not and I'm merely gratuitously over diagnosing you!

Morning ladies

Mariana how was your tea this morning? We should start marketing teasmaids to new mums. We could make a fortune! In one way the weeks are flying by i can't believe I'm 19 weeks and nearly half way. I wish I could say that I'm relishing every moment cause it will be over before I know it and I'm afraid ill have missed it in a foggy haze of anxiety. On the other hand the gap between 12 and 20 weeks seems endless. Especially having had 5 scans between 7 and 13 weeks then nothing!

Expat we live on the first floor of a converted house so no lift. The plan is to hang the pushchair on a hook in the porch so the chassis has to be pretty light. I'm just going to have to test lots.

Keep 2-3 kilos is good going. My pounds are piling on now but I still don't know where they are going. Maybe a soft padding all over rather than my bump. My bum does feel slightly more snug in my new mat jeans.

Expat do you think the Pilates is keeping my bump contained?

A very sticky and tossy turny night in London last night. I hardly feel I've slept a wink.

Buzzy and cerea how are you both today? No spotting I hope

Hello to everyone else.

Have a good day. X

Hey all
shaz I know what you mean about 13-20 weeks seeming ages. I too had 4 scans before 13 weeks, and now we're just left. But didn't you have something at 16/17 weeks? I'm going tomorrow and will hopefully hear the heartbeat, which'll be lovely. Have you felt anything yet? I think by 22 weeks most people do, even with anterior placentas. Ask which side yours is on at the scan, it may well be at the front.

mrsHY, my nearly-DD-buddy - how are you doing? Bump noticeable to others yet? Movement yet? I can't believe how much stuff you bought the other day!! We haven't even bought one single thing... Good on you! Bet it was really exciting, and must make it seem a lot more real - much of the time I still think I could be dreaming...

I am really hoping you're wrong mariana about the SPD, but I suppose it would explain it. I've just been swimming and it was actually fine - the worst seems to be when i'm in bed and rolling over, which is weird... I too love the sound of early morning snuggles and tea. But I suppose if you're exhausted, wanting sleep, and doing it every morning then maybe it loses its appeal. I'm glad your mum's being staying though.

If it carries on ask for a physio referral. SPD doesn't always become severe and even mine, which had me on crutches, disappeared the minute she was delivered.

Trenchlet has a foul cold. Poor thing can't breathe through her nose too well so feeding is a challenge. She still too young for Vicks etc so all she can have is nose drops.

Shazza I don't understand why teasmades went out of fashion. I am now wondering whether I should have my travel kettle next to my bed! The early mornings are fine unless DD1 wakes before 6 and wants her breakfast. Then it's not so relaxed...

Teasmades are great, were on a home visit with a patient and they had one, there was great discussions about who would be in charge of it now the patient or the wife

shazza no spotting but not much sickness today going menkul Trying to stay calm, hopefully its the Omeprazole for the indigestion

keep I wonder how I will cope from week 13-20 its limboland

mariana sorry trenchlet has a cold

I need to wash my hair but when I do I always have a bleed maybe I'll just wash it over the bath I can't smell that bad surely

I feel like my pregnancy is going really quickly at the moment. 24 weeks already next week.

Any advice on this? ... The twin on the left is head down and is a good little kicker, I can see my bump pop when he kicks (yes .. I know .. I still refer to them as hims .. I know I am delusional ..). The other one somersaulted in to breech and kicks me in the soft tissue downstairs somewhere, which is less noticeable. (I reckon they teamed up and divided tasks. 'You search downstairs, I do upstairs, as soon as we find the exit we're outta here!') Since yesterday morning the left twin has stopped kicking as much though. And now of course ... you guessed it ... I am worried. Normally they have a jailbreak session early morning, late at night and somewhere in between when I am quiet. Yesterday I wasn't in the office and walked around a lot, and it was quite warm, so perhaps that's why Left-Twin didn't really want to exert himself? I have a scan tomorrow morning and Left did give me a few good kicks last night, probably to reassure me, and a few measly ones this morning, so I didn't want to stress everyone out by calling the midwife. What woudl they do anyway at 23 weeks? It is not as if they could 'fix' the problem if there was one? Right? Of course, as would happen, Left Twin just started kicking against the side of my desk ...

dildals, this was one of my obsessions. You're only just at the beginning of when you're supposed to start kick counting so that should be reassuring for a start. I used to lie on my side and count until I'd felt ten kicks. You might not think you're feeling them but when you lie down and concentrate you will feel them.

Hi everyone

Dildals I keep reading how they often fall asleep when we are moving around. They are rocked by the motion. That's probably why slings work so well. So if you were walking maybe leftie is a better sleeper than rightie. I love that they are top to tail with eachother. I wonder if one says to the other 'oi get your bum outta my face!'

Ok girls we are on a bring back teasmades campaign. I actually wanted to buy one for DP a while ago but was surprised at how much they cost. I think I'll reconsider now that my need has come into the equation

Buzzy I wonder if washing your hair does bring on the bleeding? Maybe it was an unfortunate coincidence? Having said that I doubt very much that you smell at all so don't worry!

Mariana poor trenchlet. Shame she is also not quite ready for beechams cold and flu capsules. They used to do the trick for me. Might be something to do with the caffeine

Keep you are right. I had a midwife appt at 15+6. Well remembered. So only 3 weeks ago we had a heartbeat. Surely shazlett hasn't done a runner since then? I haven't seen her sneak out in the middle of the night. (I'm sure that's to come in about 18 years from now!). No movement yet. I'll ask where my placenta is I keep wondering if I feel something like little bubbles but it ends up being wind.

The parental unit arrive today. Only 7 days til they go home

X

Mariana, sorry trenchlet is snuffly. First time having a cold must be pretty miserable. Hope she's feeling better soon and that she doesn't get rid of it be giving it to you.

Shazz, I see the worry never stops. I thought that for first pregnancies particularly, and if you're fit and healthy (ie can remember having stomach muscles) it's quite normal not to feel movement until 20 weeks or even slightly later. 18 weeks is just an average. I'm sure shazlett hasn't done a runner.

Teasmades put me in mind of my grandma who was in love with hers through the 1980s. But I begin to see how there could be an attraction. That's it, my life is over, I am clearly going to miss the turning into your mother stage and turn straight into my dear departed granny. Next will be an obsession with ironing and cleanliness. It has started....

Buzz, glad you are 50% OK. I have been too scared of cooking the embryo with hot water, so pretty sure I do indeed smell. But leaning over the bath to wash hair hasn't been circumstantially implicated in any spotting yet so I am keeping my hair shiny and self-respect intact. My last bath was the night before I started spotting (to be clean for my trip to the ivf clinic) so I have had it with baths and am embracing an Elizabethan attitude of bathing once a month whether I need it or not. The jury's out on the shower but I'm keeping a close eye on it's behaviour.

No spotting for me yet today (say it quietly). My scan is on Monday. Not sure I want to know, though. I have just found out I won't see the midwife until 12 weeks and after my first NHS scan (assuming we get that far) which bothered me a bit as I'd thought DH and I would get to talk through the antenatal testing choices with her before having to make decisions on what to do. I guess I am too used to being a mollycoddled fertility patient who gets lots of information, hand holding and looking after. Welcome to the real world outside that pampered environment!

Happy longest day of the year for tomorrow to everyone.

Sorry for typos and rogue apostrophes - wretched phone keypad

ceara you should have your booking in appointment at 10 weeks, I'm still waiting to be told when mine will be, I have a scan booked for around 10 weeks so I assume they will book me in then, should ring and check really. How many weeks are you now

No spotting after hair wash although it wasn't my long hot shower that I would normally have,

I am now thinking about how I will cope on my own from week 13 to 20 weeks

I'm 9 weeks tomorrow if it's still hanging in there. I too had thought DH and I would see the midwife at 10 weeks. Apparently round here the booking appt doesn't happen until 12+ weeks; the midwives refer patients administratively for the first NHS scan and antenatal testing before they actually see us. I have to ring in a decision today as to what tests I want. Understaffed and overworked, I think. Good 'ere, eh? And this is the Home Counties, don't you know.

I have, however, been able to speak with a very nice person on the ARC helpline, who talked the tests and choices through with me and was kind enough not to make me feel a neurotic crazy infertile for wanting information and to think it all through - unlike the midwife she "got" that we aren't reassured by small percentages/might never happen platitudes, as our BFPs were those small percentages. Bless her. Lots to talk through with DH after Monday if all is still well. Meantime I will tell the midwife yes to everything whilst reserving the right to change my mind. If we have testing I'm inclined to go to the FMC for the Harmony blood test. Can't believe I am tempting fate by letting myself briefly think beyond Monday, though.

Yaay to no spotting after hair wash.