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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnant (IVF) Worriers

999 replies

Dildals · 31/03/2013 16:46

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others!

A few of us graduated from the IVF thread (link below) and are having a go at our own thread to get out of the other IVF-ers hair! So get your roomy jogging bottoms on for some virtual hand holding, mutual symptom spotting and staying sane until the next scan date.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1691674-Excellent-Egg-Buddies-continued-Anyone-having-IVF-ICSI-in-Jan-Feb-and-March-2013-please-join-us

OP posts:
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keepitgoing · 27/04/2013 12:59

Foody I live in Thailand! But coming home at the end of July. The medical care here is excellent (well, I'm nine weeks because of it!) So I wouldn't worry about that. Flying will be fine too.

ExpatAl · 27/04/2013 13:18

I need to know about the sperm frittata...

Gin, it does feel weird when the clinic cuts you loose and sends you out into the big wide pregnant world.

Foody, the early days are hard because the symptoms haven't kicked in and you start wondering if you're just nuts and imagined the whole thing (maybe that's just me). I'd def go for an early scan. It's lovely to see the heartbeat and it will put your mind at rest - for a little while at least.

Belgium has some good points but I do miss the UK and London especially, Shazza. Oh how I miss the shopping in London.

MarianaTrench · 27/04/2013 15:26

Have the holiday foodie, medical care will be accessible and as good as here in either place. My consultant always recommended a viability scan at 7 weeks.

I can't be added to the list being having already had my worrisome baby. I'll just hang around giving you advice about massive pants whether you want it or not... Scar is really painful some days then fine on others, I didn't realise it would fluctuate so much.

DD is still sleeping on me all night. I have to try and get her into her cot but she's so tiny and I hate putting her down! I'm far too soft.

I'm not sure I want to know about the sperm frittata.

keepitgoing · 27/04/2013 15:46

Awwww Mariana, a baby sleeping on you is just gorgeous, I'm not surprised you can't put her down.

GinSoaked · 27/04/2013 17:23

Oh no, I feel terrible now - mrshy herself didn't create/use a sperm frittata! I think we were discussing crazies we'd come across who'd used it as a fertility thang.

Awww mariana you've already had your baybee, how lovely! Is she no 1?

shazz my Yorkshire connection is my DH too! Fingers crossed for the harmony test. Will you find out the sex?!

Shazzamattazzerly · 27/04/2013 17:23

Mariana you can't leave us now. Definitely keep giving us advice about gigantic pants and such like!

I'm wondering when I can fit in the final holiday before I can't fly and shazlett makes her arrival. We chose not to fly in first trimester and I would like to visit my friends in Italy. Not so far afield foody but I'd definitely go and enjoy yourself. As long as you take your notes with you just in case. (you'll get them at your first midwife appt. )
Oh and thanks for adding me to the list.

Foodylicious · 27/04/2013 17:28

Mariana i have some bad burn scars from when i was a child and the nerve type shooting pains i got through them could be really bad sometimes. things that made it worse - being cold (think it makes the scar contract), dry skin. Things that helped - warmth, massage and vitamin e cream. I also had some little sheets of silicone for a while, which if kept on for 20hrs a day for at least 3 months are really meant to make a difference, helping the scar to heal and reduce. Cant really say if they helped as i was so young and the scars covered such a large area, but i am sure they did something as they are still recomeded 20 yrs later!
I think the pains were the nerves and tissue knitting together again, so unpleasent but not a bad thing. My sister has just had another little one and having her sleeping on me is anamazing feeling so it must be to the max x 10 when it is your own Smile

fairypangolin · 27/04/2013 18:45

foody will you be about 20-22 weeks when you go on holiday? I would have thought that was fine although you might find the heat in Thailand a bit hard to bear along with the long flight to Australia. Just don't plan to do too much.

mariana I love your husband's knicker comment. I found recovery from the cs really slow but I know other women who felt normal again really quickly. I think I stuck with the big pants for quite a while.

expat you can claim childcare costs on your taxes? Now that is enlightened! Childcare costs here are absurd and the govt wonders why in so many families only one person works?

Sperm frittata... Hmm well I'm quite glad I never got that crazy in the quest to conceive - but I certainly wouldn't want to judge anyone who did (for the benefit of the wider audience out there).

I'm on my phone too so I would be grateful if someone can add me to the list: fairypangolin- 15 weeks, edd 14 oct, 1 DS

Foodylicious · 27/04/2013 18:54

fairy thankfully we decided not to book our internal flights, so have no commitment to try to fit everything in while we are there. we are also staying mostly with friends in Oz. Ths difficulty may be the relentless partying of everyone else in Thailand! its a 10 yr aniversary of a friends wedding and a big group of us are meeting up. Guessing/hoping most people will have at least one quieter night each and will look after me a bit!

RECAP
ExpatAl, 21 weeks, edd 6 Sept (prob cs one week before)
GinSoaked, 7 weeks, edd 14 Dec, baby #1
Keepitgoing, 9 weeks, edd 29 November
Shazza 11+1 wks EDD15 nov baby #1
Foody, 4-5 weeks, edd 26 Dec-01 Jan, baby #1
fairypangolin- 15 weeks, edd 14 oct, 1 DS

Dildals · 27/04/2013 20:41

Welcome foody and gin!

What about a placenta frittata? Or an omelette? Apparently good for PND and restoring iron levels ;-).

Dildals, 15 weeks, EDD 12 Oct, TWINS! (It still hasn't stopped being extremely exciting, sorry!)

OP posts:
Dildals · 27/04/2013 20:53

Oh, and I am Souf London. I live waddling distance from King's, DH was born there, his brother and his brothers kids. So I would be breaking a fine family tradition if I went for another hospital!

MrsHY Are you getting in to the Lanes or Oakwood?

OP posts:
MarianaTrench · 27/04/2013 22:28

Foody, you poor thing with the burns, it sounds like a very serious injury. I think with me there's a lot going on with both the internal and external healing and it's early days yet.

I'm not going anywhere Shazza! I'm here to root for you all (and identify with the mentalling.)

Gin she's 12 days old and she's my second. Fourth pregnancy though sadly. I spent nine months mentalling about her and am actually surprisingly calm now she's here. I thought I'd be nuts with anxiety. I think it's hormones...

I went on holiday with DD1 at 24 weeks, that was ok in that I could still sight see but did have a nap most afternoons. This time I didn't want to go anywhere but we had just put our house up for sale when I found out I was pregnant so had a lot going on with moving. If you're going somewhere with decent health care then don't worry.

Foodylicious · 27/04/2013 23:10

Hi, after some advice - anyone else had high temperatures? felt really hot and not great this evening and mine was 38.1. Been a bit more crampy today and had back ache, but it could be that I I just paying too much attention to it because I felt crap today and that I have been sat in the sofa too long. Anyway, I called NHS direct and was told to keep checking temp and take paracetamol and to go to drs on monday if still worried/having symptoms. Does this sound right?? what could be causing the temp? have got myself into a bit of a state (undertatement!) and am imagining the worst. Cold and shivery now, temp down to 37.3

keepitgoing · 28/04/2013 03:15

foody I'd have thought unrelated to pregnancy, and at this stage the embryo is v small so not to worry? I can't see how it could be related to something bad?

BTW where are you going in Thailand. It's hot but as long as you swim and drink plenty you'll be OK.

MarianaTrench · 28/04/2013 05:17

Sounds like a virus to me foody, you're a bit immune deficient remember. Paracetamol and drink lots of water.

Foodylicious · 28/04/2013 10:00

Thanks guys, feeling a bit better this morning and temp 37.6 so mcuh happier (i know this is a little raised, but its normal for me). Got myself into such a state last night. Telling myself to relax, reassured by still having sore boobs and feeling queesy!
keep we are going to Phuket, will be there from 29th Aug so hot but rainy I guess!

Shazzamattazzerly · 28/04/2013 10:16

Morning ladies

I'm taking a break from chores to say hello.

Glad you are feeling better foody.

All fine here except I woke up at 5 and couldn't go back to sleep. I also couldn't quite wake up enough to get up so I just laid there!

Have a lovely Sunday.

Shaz x

Foodylicious · 28/04/2013 11:16

didals TWINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that is super exciting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am currrently avoiding my essay, have 2 x 4000words to do in a fortnight, have only managed about 500 words so far

MarianaTrench · 28/04/2013 12:26

I was musing about twins earlier, I concluded that I am in awe of those with twins about the same amount as I am in awe of single parents of babies. Apparently, it's better if they are your first as you don't know any different.

Hope that's not the start of pregnancy insomnia Shazza.

Glad you're feeling better foody, I had norovirus whilst pregnant once and despite me nearly vomiting up my own spine the baby wasn't affected. The advice was merely to stay hydrated.

Awful mood here today, I feel really hormonal and overwhelmed by everything, plus the bleeding is heavy again and I'm sore all over. DH is back at work tomorrow and I'm dreading it. Pathetic as mum is coming back on Tuesday for a couple of days.

Gah, must pull myself together.

ExpatAl · 28/04/2013 12:36

Mariana, I bled a lot after my CS if I overdid things. Might that be the case with you? I really think pulling yourself together is overated.

Dildals · 28/04/2013 13:27

I am with ExpatAl here, pregnancy and new motherhood is the time you should cut yourself some slack, nothing more healing than a big old moan sometimes.

Expat mentioned earlier in the thread that childcare costs are deductible in Belgium agains tax. They are here as well, in a way, if your employer runs a childcare voucher scheme you can pay for childcare out of pre tax salary (up to a certain amount). If you jointly earn less than 41K and both work +16 hrs you are eligible for additional tax credits which are fairly substantial, so worth checking out. A new scheme is proposed where 20% of childcare costs up to £6K annually back, but this is not law yet.

My local nursery (as in, down the street) charges £60 a day for a fulltime place (that does include breakfast & tea), which would come to £1,200 a month, times two! EEK. It is quite a posh nursery so I am hoping there are some cheaper ones around (although I think £55 is pretty much the going rate). For that type of money I think I could employ someone!
There should be a scheme to link up parents in need of childcare and lonely pensioners that would quite fancy some surrogate grandparenting!

My next door neighbour who popped out no 5 over Easter had a shouting match on the street this morning with one/several of her children. They play in their garden, which resembles a tip, seriously, she keeps stacks of old clothes in the paddling pool. Why? I really hope she won't offer any baby sitting services ...

I think I may go and check out the sun in my (tidy) garden :-) !

OP posts:
MarianaTrench · 28/04/2013 13:44

I'm just very tired, but I managed to get the baby sleeping next to me last night, rather than on me so that might mean a bit more sleep tonight. I'd had three days with no bleeding at all and didn't think I'd overdone anything so was disappointed it came back so badly.

Childcare costs for twins might well make it cheaper to hire a nanny. Will you be going back full time dildals? I'm only doing 2.5 days a week for the next 5 years, I'll increase my hours after that but for now I really like having time at home but escaping to work for some peace. My 'career' is fairly stalled at the level I'm currently at as I'm not prepared to put in the slog to shimmy up the greasy and family unfriendly pole!

Shazzamattazzerly · 28/04/2013 14:18

Dildals I'm impressed with your knowledge. I find it all so confusing.

Mariana I also think try not to be so hard on yourself. You are doing masses looking after a new born as well as healing your body. I hope you can find a way to relax today and find a tiny bit of peace your mum will be with you soon and there's nothing like your mum to help. Smile

X

putthecrispsDOWN · 28/04/2013 21:00

Hi all...can I join? I was on the IVF thread and am now a very nervous 4 1/2weeks....only found out a few days ago. This was our fourth cycle...I already have a gorgeous miracle Dd from cycle 1 when I conceived twins but sadly miscarried my other daughter. Am halfway between ecstatic and feeling like every time I think about having a baby I am jinxing it. I just want the next few weeks to be uneventful and to speed past so I can get to the enjoyable bit. How did you all cope with the endless waiting? X

Foodylicious · 28/04/2013 22:03

Hiya crisps can I call you that or you prefer down?? sound like are about as far along as me! I have not been on here long and everyone has been great so far, so welcome!!Flowers

had a super nervous and teary day yesterday (read hysterical!) but have been much better today. Am too wishing this bit would hurry up, hoping I feel better after an early scan in a few weeks ,

copy and pate the list and add yourself so we all know

RECAP
ExpatAl, 21 weeks, edd 6 Sept (prob cs one week before)
GinSoaked, 7 weeks, edd 14 Dec, baby #1
Keepitgoing, 9 weeks, edd 29 November
Shazza 11+1 wks EDD15 nov baby #1
Foody, 4-5 weeks, edd 26 Dec-01 Jan, baby #1
fairypangolin- 15 weeks, edd 14 oct, 1 DS
Dildals, 15 weeks, EDD 12 Oct, TWINS!