Fantastic, fabulous 40+ Mums-to-be! Part 3

[eagleray]

We've run out of space so here's a new thread so we can support each other and talk about the trials, tribulations and utter joy at being pregnant at 40+

All new members welcome

Right, am recovering from that hideousness!

knicky and mrsw I've heard millions of times that second babies engage much later, sometimes just before labour. My little madam was transverse a couple of weeks ago if you remember and at MW appointment on Wed she was starting to engage. I want us to labour simultaneously now. Anything else seems unfair. Synchronise watches. Our pain-free, 4 hour labours start...now!

scarecrow I didn't get round to watching Borgen but might look for a box set. I loved the Killing, esp series 1. Also Wallander - both versions (have a bit of a thing for Kenneth Branagh which helps). Love a bit of Scandi crime.

chairman ... Wow! Keep twiddling your nipples cause I have a feeling it's going to pay off! I have no experience of natural birth but it sounds like its happening! I'm happy to hear about the gory details its all very fascinating. Must be frustrating to start and stop but it sounds like your body is doing it in its own time - it's going to get there.

knicky vent away absolutely. Been there. Does he know that you need to be relaxed? If not then he's like lots of other men - god knows how we did it before Nct classes and the like - I guess the men were kept away and maybe there's some ancient wisdom in that - not that it's not total progress that they are involved.

My dp is being pretty good but he has me working my ass off on the admin for his mothers house sale. She will complete and move in with us a week before my section.

I think you only need a slight nudge so if you are induced it will work beautifully. Will it be 40 weeks they'll go for? Ie 17th in you go?

mrsw good luck to you too though as I remember from your previous births your not likely to be early - it's neck and neck knicky and chairman.

scarecrow chez nous its deadwood and breaking bad at the mo.

Scarecrow Borgen is amaaaaaaazing! I can't wait for the new series...

Yes yes yes to Borgen. Just watched last of season 2 on the recorder and it's fab, as was season 1. Keep twiddling, Chairman... I'm for induction on 21st, so I reckon you'll beat me to it - don't wait! I am twiddling as often as possible (refraining in public, most of the time) and still half heartedly trying to express, so you never know.

Chairman - we need a labour alert system now, otherwise am going to get no work done for checking progress.... And, weirdly, another vote for Kenneth B (not something I normally admit to). Also loved Wallender. I will donate Borgen to snug when I've done (is investment for mat leave...8 (work) days now. I tell you I'm going to be even more pleased than the chancellor when the budget is over (next day my last)...

Don't over do it Somewhere (ok, pots/kettles, but at least I speak from experience).

I'm in awe at Eagle's 3mi daily walks up to birth - I'm pooped by M&S (my current excuse for not getting as far as Tesco, because it has nothing to do with better cheese in m&S; oh no..)
Happy Mondays x

somewhere You have my sympathies on the house front. It's so frustrating trying to chase up useless solicitors etc. hope you get it sorted with minimum stress. I can't remember whether you said if you have a good relationship with MIL. Will she help much with the baby? Hope you get lots of breaks. You deserve it.

mrsw I really wouldn't count on me coming first, or even second. My labour was crap with DS. Kept slowing and I must have walked miles to keep things going. And he was 12 days late! This time I have PGP as well so am restricted. Dying to meet her now the move is over and things are calmer. Let's keep twiddling. D'ya reckon I should get the breast pump out as well?

I saw Kenneth in that obscure Chekhov play Ivanovo - unforgettable.

I can't walk either. Walking is done, finished, over. I nearly burst into tears in Tesco on Friday I got so tired.

AFM My ds is ill today - too ill go to nursery. But not so ill he will just lie there. Bit apprehensive - I have tonnes to do.

Yes checking quite a lot. Knicky has gone quiet - this is often a sign....

21st for mrs w - ten days!

Xxxx

If only somewhere.....no just quiet as took DD to soft play at the crack of dawn then onto gymnastics (for her not me . After 3 hours of full on exercise she's fast asleep - my work is done!! Poor you with the walking - it's flipping excruciating isn't it?? Not long now though - home straight is beckoning!

My midwife says it's not policy at my trust to induce at 40 weeks due to being over 40 so induction planned for 17th due date. Have a midwife appointment this Thursday where I'm hoping for a sweep, then the following week will have an appointment at the hospital for another sweep. If all else fails think they will start an induction 10 days over.

Until then there will be 3 of us twiddling nipples, bouncing on birth balls, eating pineapple and dhansaks (extra hot). Ooh, I wonder who'll be first! My money is on chairman, swiftly folllowed by MrsW, then me. (I always seem to lag behind so suspect that this will be no different).

May the best woman win

PS chairman your show - blimey that sounded a bit dramatic! I read your post as I was eating my weetabix this morning - no fear your description of your plug didn't stop me from finishing

Missed a word in my last post...no induction is planned for my due date on the 17th. Just continuing with the usual 40 and 41 week appointments.....

Missed a word in my last post...no induction is planned for my due date on the 17th. Just continuing with the usual 40 and 41 week appointments.....

Somewhere, don't take this the wrong way: I am strangely comforted by your message. Had been feeling increasingly low at how pathetic I was being - making mistake of comparing myself to previous pregnancy. Now feel more "normal" and reassured. For the world though don't wish you to be feeling such a strain. Hope DS recovers soon & calmly!
Take care all

Thanks for sympathies - I'm just crap at being pregnant - bit of a whinger in truth - I assume its safe on mumsnet but sometimes wonder if I'm being a bit negative even for anonymous 'friends' who can get away from me really easily! in which case apols. scarecrow I'm not sure I'm the benchmark of normal but always pleased to be of service.

I should've added swimming isn't over - swimming is superb and my upper body is actually kinda toned and ready to hold the LO.

My goodness knicky we could be very close then! Get twiddling guys - maybe you can synchronise. Or is that weird?

chairman yes I get on with her very well. I am doing all her moving admin - not just legal. It makes me feel good in a way - my parents never ask me for anything to the point it's almost insulting! Her mind is good so I know that once she's in her own place she will be able to resume everything. It is a touch nail biting doing it all to a deadline a week before the c section but hey that seems to be what the gods want for me this pg - maximum upheaval.

MIL a bit disabled and 76 so no child care panacea but she is an amazing cook and likes housework and can def hold baby for an hour here and there while I sleep. She has a good mind so hoping she will work with DP to do 10.30pm bottle feed.

God guys - it is neck and neck, mrsw I did you an injustice you are very much in the game.

Hope you are all having clear time to let the oxytocin flow, lie on couch, hug partner, weep at random things on telly, let the river of interlocking hormones carry you away. Hope you don't mind a person who will never experience it saying that!

Happy twiddling.

Xxx

Just realised I x-posted with you this morning scarecrow. I'm so sorry you're still working. I was dreading the budget (more cuts no doubt) but for your sake let's get it over with! You and somewhere need to be getting some chill time in before the next round of sleep-deprivation begins.

knicky no post-40 induction here either. At first I felt a bit panicky about it as I'd read scary things. But then I looked into the scary things and it was the usual media screechy bollocks about elderly mummies and how utterly irresponsible we are, and statistically as with most things the risk is only slightly raised. So, fine with that now.

Yes, we must get a labour warning system going. Though after last Thurs/Fri I don't think I'll actually believe it's labour til I'm pushing the wee madam out! How about we post if we start to contract then if there's no further news we can safely assume the poster is down the hozzy?

Ps scarecrow if you are suffering your not letting it show - your attitude is terrific - thoughtful and positive and bloody hard working.

at the labour warning system, but marvellous idea! Will post if I start contracting.....I still feel it could be a while off - I don't think any amount of twiddling is going to shift him. somewhere think simultaneous twiddling would start to border on a bit weird . And yes, our due dates could be closer than we both first thought. As long as it's not on my birthday (otherwise I suspect my birthday will be always somehow forgotten in years to come....on second thoughts given my age maybe not such a bad thing.......!!)

I bloody love this thread! BBD thank you for paving the way to the graduates thread. Looking forward to meeting up with old and new friends there and hoping that as many from this thread wend their way there too.

I'm currently lying on a sofa reading a trashy novel. DH and DD are in the kitchen making double chocolate chip muffins. How life will change in a couple weeks! Still, till then I'm going to enjoy every glorious minute of being on this sofa!

Meant to say off for a full on reflexology session on Wednesday - the woman has said she can usually get labour going by pressing certain points on my feet. Old sceptical knickyknocks here is not so sure, but of course will report back if twinges start up shortly after the session.

Possibly the most annoying thing that can happen in a kitchen has just happened to me short of whole oven losing power just before guests arrive. I somehow let the casserole dish fall back, and half of it has gone into the double glazing crevice on the oven door. Grrr. My ds was rather good 'there's still lots left mummy'.

knicky good luck with the reflexology - v interesting. It sounds like you are getting more of what you deserve - couch, novel, choccy - hurrah your dp has woman'd up! I'm doing an nct refresher and have to say its quite thought provoking about why and how labour happens. Being totally indulged seems to have an important place!

I'm sorry I'm over posting today - with ds ill it seems I can't keep away.

Have achieved though in a way - seven tasks done for mil and a half spilled casserole

Oh somewhere what a total nightmare. That's happened to me before. It's a bugger to clear up. Far too difficult for a pregnant lady . Your MIL sounds lovely. I'm jealous. Mine is the same age but completely over-reliant on her two sons (SIL doesn't really bother with her). MIL could definitely do more for herself. She even gets everyone to buy their own birthday and Christmas presents and just doles out cheques! I try to keep it buttoned. Anyway, sounds like some lovely food and help with the housework will be a great help.

I'm on for a bit of a vent. DH has turned into a total misery since we moved. He's always been a bit obsessed with money (the spending of), bordering on miserly. But now we're paying a bigger mortgage and doing stuff to the house he's like a moping teenager. He just groans and sighs all the time and gets upset if I buy any branded groceries. We can so afford to do this so there's no need. He was the same when we bought our first house until I managed to convince him that paying a mortgage wouldn't lead to us becoming bankrupt. Honestly, it's like someone's stolen my husband and left me with a particularly miserly curmudgeon. First thing he asks when he gets home: 'how long have you had the heating on for today?'. This afternoon I told him most of the day and he sulked for about an hour! It's been snowing most of the day ffs!! Aaaaargh! Someone bring my DH back. I don't like this man.

That feels better. Thanks

Somewhere, you are kind. Too kind I suspect. I do have a sneaking suspicion that all my dedication to work at moment might be for nowt - ie they have no idea how much I'm struggling. But it seems like the right thing to do. I think!

Chairman, sorry your DH been stolen. Have you reported it?! Tell this impostor to big off, I say. Can you allocate him one whinge a day

Have been gripped by the Chris Huhne/Vicky Pryce saga today. A really modern revenge tragedy in so many ways. I know they did wrong, and Huhne lied terribly (his explanation in Guardian tonight horribly plausible though - that you start off thinking this is such a small thing it won't go anywhere and then get trapped by your lies...), but I cannot join the baying for blood - I can't help feeling that his son is so angry and bitter that that will be worse than any punishment a judge gives out. I also read the emails between Pryce and the Sunday Times journo and think - that woman needed to be sent for psychiatric support, not spread all over the papers. Though her bitterness was like nothing I have ever seen.
Phew.

On that note, sweet dreams (or happy twiddling (what the??! Never heard of that!) all, Sx

scarecrow I agree with somewhere. I hope your work realise what a gem they have in you. You've clearly gone way above and beyond. I would imagine you'll be sorely missed while you're off.

Synchronised nipple twiddles are definitely a bit weird. I find doing it on my own a bit weird too. Haven't done it today. I feel like I'm going to go through the roof each time. Sexy it ain't!

I've been fascinated by the whole Huhne/Pryce saga as well. He really should have known better. What an arse to fight it. This would have died down a long time ago if he'd 'fessed up. The lying seems the worst part. She's clearly pretty messed up too. To take it all this way is beyond normal post- dumping revenge fantasies. And those texts with his son. What a horrible mess that family is in.

knicky Hope the reflexology is effective. If nothing else it'll be relaxing do report back though! My friend's sis had it for very painful periods and could actually feel her uterus twinge when the woman found the corresponding part of her foot. Let's hope she gets you going. I think there'll be a queue if it works for you!

Things got even better with DH this evening when he found the boiler dripping earlier. He's spent most of the evening torturing himself on Google and is now convinced we need a new boiler. I hope this baby arrives soon or she'll be born in jail while I'm on remand for throttling the miserable old git!

Night all x

scarecrow agree with the others - you've been an absolute trooper with such long hours and a commute. I'm hoping you'll be able to put your feet up soon (mat leave starts soon?) and have some time to relax before baby no2 is here.

chairman gosh yes vent away - it certainly made me feel better when I did the same. Branded groceries? How very dare you! AND the heating on for some of the day? Blimey chairman you are living life to it's very edge.....!Oh dear, understand where your DH is coming from - it seems that we too live in a nice house there's always something to be done and you only discover things when you're fully moved in. Hope he gets over his grumps soon, hopefully a bit of sleep deprivation will leave him unable to go into fine detail with finances as he'll be too damn tired.......

Ooh a corresponding twinge in the uterus from reflexology?! Sounds promising......am hoping she'll give the feet a good pummeling in a vain attempt to get things going.

somewhere how's DS? Any better? Is he able to get back to nursery today? Hope so - just to give you a bit of you time

AFM, DH and DD are not here today. DD is at nursery, DH is at work. I'm very aware that this may be one of the last week's that this happens. Going to get a box set out - or might see what's on pay per view - it's flipping luxury!

Hope none of you got caught in the snow yesterday or today - we're in Surrey and MIL (who's our main contact to look after DD when the contractions start) lives in Sussex, near to the M23 where people were stranded for up to 8 hours. Thank god I didn't go into labour yesterday! Not sure what we would have done!

quick hello from me while Baby Eagle (who now finally has a proper name) sleeps briefly

Thinking of those whose labour is imminent! It is a funny time from what I can recall (although honestly can't recall much now) and is a bit like waiting to board a long-haul flight (although you don't know what day you are departing).

My only real memory of the day before I went into labour was trudging for miles across a snow/ice covered hill, wobbling all over the place, and DP in hot pursuit telling me I was mad. After about 4 miles I realised I couldn't walk any further and had to sit on the roadside, huge and embarrassed while DP went off to try and locate the car a mile or two down the road. Looking back, I should have parked my arse on the sofa and eaten chocolate...

Looking forward to seeing you all on the other side very soon

Sorry have been AWOL, a few stupid days (with MIL Sunday, then with MIL again yesterday as she ended up in A & E) and a really annoying one today....

Patience severely tried all day by National Grid. They come (twice) the other week to say they have to remove a defunct gas supply to the flat upstairs. Then I get a letter telling me the same, so I ring them to check exactly what they will be doing. They tell me, removing a pipe from outside, no access required, an hour or so.

They turn up at 9 this morning, and don't leave til 3.45. They dig up the garden, obliterate a flowerbed (which I had planted) with no explanation beforehand, they demand access to the living room and bedroom. DH and I have two steaming rows over this.... My clothes rail then breaks as it has to be moved (with no notice). Can't use living room and bedroom all day, and have no heating or hot water. They remove the meter.... DH and I have another row. This was supposed to be a nice day in which we could do things, as he for once, had a day off of work. He might as well have been at work.

I am incandescent. I have had my whole day ruined, I have been cold, had nowhere to sit, can't lie down, had the garden buggered. Then they have left an enormous hole in front of the house and one in the garden..which they will fill in....soon. What do I get from all this inconvenience? Nothing. It's just so they can make sure I'm not siphoning gas from an unmetered second supply. The house was empty for a year before we moved in...they had plenty of time to do this. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Back for a proper post when I have calmed down!!!

BadMiss, you poor thing. Vent away til you feel better!

Chairman, your DH and my mum could get together for a Victor Meldrew tribute. DPs insist on buying Sainsburys Value/Basics for everything except meat and fish, and are horrified their DCs do not self flagellate with cardboard birdseed for breakfast, etc.. DM seriously suggested I cut toes off DD's shoes to save money. I love her to bits and she is v generous, but odd attitudes to what is worth spending money on - primarily not herself. War babies!

Somewhere, hope DS better (for your sake and his!)

Eagle, we miss you! Great about name. In Australia I'm told if you don't name child in time state picks a name! Also thanks for sling tips.

Knicky, forgot to say - had reflexology couple of weeks ago - nota single headache or hip pain (mine was more deep muscle than usual PGP which I think is ligaments?) since. I was an poem-minded semi-skeptic. Now not evangelist but intrigued and definitely would try again for that sort of thing...
Would really like to hear your report back x

DM seriously suggested I cut toes off DD's shoes to save money . Oh imagine your poor DD traipsing along with her toes sticking out of her shoes. What are you supposed to do when it rains? Carrier bags?!

We had a bit of an argument this evening when I caught him peeling back wallpaper to check for (non existent) damp. He's just inventing problems now. I've basically spent since the beginning of this year sorting out the move, chasing solicitors and estate agents up etc and now we're in the house I've got him obsessing that the place is going to fall down/we'll end up bankrupt/on the streets etc. I'm 39 weeks preg! Told him in no uncertain terms to stop it. No more obsessing, money moaning etc, it's time to chill til the baby arrives and focus on the kids.

Amusingly he told me that his dad used to write down the meter readings before he went to work every day and would check whrn he got home to make sure the heating hadn't been on too long. So it's inherited. Which means I'm stuck with it .