Co sleeping and SIDS leaflet at doctors

[Rowanhart]

I was planning in co sleeping when our DD is born in three weeks.

I was at docs today waiting for whooping cough jab when saw a leaflet called Risks of co sleeping.

In it said that infant mortality due to co sleeping is high the area we live in and we should never co sleep.

Also had quotes from two mums whose babies had died due to co sleeping,

I thought it was recommended? Confused now but thinking co sleeping is a big no no...

We did with DD2 as we had no choice. Small house, small rooms. When she grew out of her Moses basket-which didn't take long as she was a big baby-we didn't have room for a bigger cot in our room, so she came into our bed. Easier for breast feeding too. When we eventually managed to sell our house and she had her own cot in her own room at 8 months old, it took about two weeks for her to get used to it. Which was not bad at all. I don't regret it. Obviously bedroom time with husband didn't happen, but you don't fancy that much in the early days anyway?!

I co-slept with all of mine, with 2 of them I co-slept in the hospital which was lovely and far easier than having them further away in the crib.

I discovered that I had far more natural instincts than I realised, I have often woken a second before the baby has stirred and settled them straight away, or even woken when as they have done that thing that babies do where they stop snuffling and take a sort of pause/hold their breath.

I also had a co-sleeping crib at one point, that was lovely too, I didn't drink at al when I was co-sleeping so with the crib I just used to put the side up if I had had a glass of wine.

I tried to co-sleep with DS1 but it did not work because he was such a wriggle he was either pushing himself against me in an attempt to propel himself off the bed or he was pushing me out of the bed.

DS2 was and still is a real cuddlier. It was and still is really easy to co-sleep with him because he just snuggles in and goes to sleep.

The risks of anything happening are so small I believe it is down to individual preference and what suits your family set up.

I think the most important thing is not to let baby get too hot, and it can under an adult duvet, because unlike you the baby can't stick its toes out.
I co-slept, it was lovely, but adjusting the different bedding was the key.Separate duvets if there are two adults in the bed and the baby is in the middle maybe. Also if you take a baby out of its cot, in a sleeping bag and then put it in bed with you, you have to remember to reduce the layers of bedding on top.
The other issue for me was the baby rolling out of bed which I am afraid she did do once or twice, so soft landing or wall please

Co-sleeping,yes I recommend it. My children have all ended up excellent sleepers, very few ailments and went back to their own beds at two or three. I admit ds2 (who has ASD) continued a while longer, but maybe he needed it more.

I read about this before deciding. There is an article from NCT with good evidence which has already been posted, also you may want to google James McKenna.

I put a cot with one side down next to our bed (very securely fastened with no gaps, no pillow, own baby blanket (not our duvet) new baby mattress etc) which is where baby slept a lot of the time. but then brought baby into bed for feeds and (often) put them back after. For me it was best of both worlds.

My personal opinion is that it seems (from my reading) safer to breastfeed and co-sleep than formula feed and cot sleep. But you don't have to only have those 2 options!

I wouldn't have allowed any co-sleeping unless I was breastfeeding (I sound like some kind of bf fanatic - I'm not!!). Although I looked into the statistics and felt what I was doing a safe thing, I still felt a bit concerned for the first few weeks as before having children (have 2) I slept quite soundly! however I realized me and baby would wake at around the same time for a feed and seemed "in sync", if baby was in bed with me, it was virtually impossible for me to sleep in any other position other than protectively curled around baby, and I have to say we slept fantastically well.

Like Camelsshouldnteatcrisps I too felt some natural instincts about sleep during that time. Baby barely cried at night until I put the cot side up permanently when they were more mobile ?age!

BUT if I had drunk ANY alcohol, or my DH had, or he was overtired, or if either of us had been smokers I would NOT have done it and made sure baby stayed in the cot.

So although I would say it was great and I'm planning to do it again with baby number 3 in few days time I would be cautious about recommending it unless I knew the person wasn't going to statistically increase their babies risk of SIDS (which I know is still very small).

I couldn't read all the answers but would like to say that, according to some sources, it is precisely the habit of forcing a newborn to sleep for long hours (and sleep training) that is associated to SIDS (because newborns are designed to have light sleep and to wake up several times). (no, I don't have references here, sorry)

People have co slept since, well, forever. It is the natural thing to do. If you follow all the safety recommendations the risks are very low.

I don't know if someone has already recommended, but the book "Three in a Bed" has loads of information and is based in lots of research (cited in the book).

Don't let the scare mongerers scare you!

I took the whole not cosleeping when babes thing very seriously. I guess I was worried that I was so tired I could squash him just like I only breastfed alone and in the light as I have huge breasts and it was hard (not to suffocate ds).

However, as I got more confident as a parent ie I knew my limits and capabilities, I started co sleeping when ds was 1 years old and never looked back. I'm a light sleeper though.

The research shows that if you breastfeed and you and your partner did not smoke in pregnancy and don't smoke now, don't drink alcohol, don't take drugs and plan to bed share (ie organise the environment), then the SIDS risk is double that of having the baby in a cot in your room. However, the risk is still minute. In fact, some research showed that parents who did none of the things above, and had the baby in their bed some of the night, with it in it's own cot some of the night, had a lower risk than babies who never came into bed at all.

The risk factors that increase the incidence of SIDS (to varying degrees) are low birth weight, prematurity, smoking in pregnancy (mum & partner), smoking in the household where the baby is living (by anyone), formula feeding, placing baby on its front or side, alcohol intake, drugs (both prescription and illicit) and co-sleeping with no planning (ie because there is no cot/safe baby space available) and putting the baby in its own room away from the parents before 6 months.

Some SIDS cases will never be explainable, but many are linked to the risks above, many are a complex combination of factors. It is very hard to give out blanket advice as everyone has a different level of risk. You have to make the most appropriate decision for you and your child based on your own circumstances.

I think it just depends on each individual circumstance, I co sleep (at least when I'm not in hospital am pg now) my son now 4 was born at 26 weeks and right from the start wouldn't settle without me there or some kind of skin contact once home I breast fed and had him in with me. I had towels not pillows and used blankets for me and separate ones for ds. Worked perfectly especially as ds is the worst sleeper ever. I don't drink or smoke though and always slept just the two of us. My opinion is that it's far more natural this way after all mothers have been sleeping with their babies since the dawn of time, but you do have to do it right iyswim. I have no qualms about co sleeping with this baby. There's risks whatever you decide and you can never be 100% safe unfortunately you just have to read the info and make your own mind up. Don't let them scare you away though if its what you want to do.

Could you link to that research please Mooncup?

Well, FWIW I coslept in a big bed with both my dcs, now aged 18 and 12 . With dd I coslept till 2.

I understood it was only bad if you just fell asleep with dcs on the couch/sofa, or if you smoked or did serious amounts of drugs or alcohol?

However, dh was exiled to an adjacent single, and I ditched the duvet.

sieg - I think it is if you do ANY amount of drugs or alcohol not serious.

Sorry to be pedantic!

I am waiting for it to be emailed to me - it was given out on a training day I went on. I think most of what I said is fairly well known though? Was there a particular reference you want me to look out for?

FWIW, I co-slept/sleep with both of mine but made that decision based on how assessed our individual risk factors.

DD has co-slept with us from 15months. We have a futon and she starts off on her cot mattress on the floor to the side of me and then comes in next to me about 2am for a bf (we do need to stop soon!). She snuggles into me for a cuddle about 5am and a bf. This is very nice, but can't continue long term. I found that she was too small to do this until she turned 12mths. Any tips on stopping the bf in the night?!

I wouldn't - but then I'm a VERY deep sleeper, so if I rolled onto the baby I very much doubt that I would wake up at that point. TBH (although I don't have my own kids) the idea of me waking up when they cry is a bit questionable!

Mooncup - if I understand you rightly you are saying that even without any risk factors, bedsharing doubles the risk of death. That seems to be the opposite of the conclusion from the research in this article for example www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/oct/16/sudden-infant-death-syndrome-children

There is a really informative discussion of this topic on this MN webchat.

A few things to clear up. Co-sleeping is a SIDS risk.

Co-sleeping doesn't cause SIDS. No one knows the cause(s). SIDS deaths are correlated with co-sleeping and many other factors.

SIDS babies most frequently have two risk factors at least e.g. Co-sleeping + on tummy, or mother smokes + premature baby.

I did co-sleep for the record, but I would never recommend it to other mums and I'm always a bit gobsmacked at how commonly MNetters suugest this to ease sleep issues. I also put DS to sleep on his tum occasionally, but would not recommend this to other mums either.

All that you can do is clearly assess the risks, and fully understanding them, make your own mind up about what is best to do. Bear in mind that statistical correlations are not causes. Babies with no SIDS risk factors still die of SIDS.

Yes Sam, that was my understanding from the info we were given. The article you linked to was related to a relatively small study, afaik the info we were given was based on a meta-analysis from many countries. However, I am no expert and I do not have the figures to hand. My understanding was - for eg and I am making up figs for illustration - that if you have no other risk factors and you have baby in a cot in your room throughout the night then your risk is 0.005, but if you co-sleep then your risk increases to 0.01, if you bed share some of the night ie for feeds but the baby ends up back in its cot in your room then your risk is 0.004. The overall message being that if you have no risk factors and follow advice, your risk of SIDS is v small in all of these situations. If however you add in risk factors such as smoking, then the risks become values way over one, some hugely so.

Like I say, I am not in anyway an expert, I co-sleep/slept and I did that after arriving at my own assessment of our own individual risks. i don't think anything I've said is contrary to current advice ie the safest place for your baby is in your room in its own cot, on its back, feet-to-foot.

fsid.org.uk/document.doc?id=42 This has a good round-up of research in it, with reasoning behind current advice. It doesn't back up my made up figures, or even my understanding that your tiny risk doubles but it's info along the same lines in that 5 studies have shown an increased risk.

fsid.org.uk/document.doc?id=271 This is really interesting too.

i was too paranoid to do it with a fragile newborn, but as she got more robust, she found our way to our bed. With silent reflux and comfort breastfeeding,
I had to or I wouldn't get any sleep! Now we partly co-sleep: DD (14 months) goes to sleep in her cot, but we take her to our bed when she wakes up (at about 2 or 3 am). Do what feels right to you.

I did when my dd wouldn't settle any other way and I was completely exhausted. I lay my dd on a pillow so that she was elevated and placed her between me and the side of the cot (which was next to the bed). The pillow meant that I couldnt roll on to her (however, I feel that I wouldnt have anyway because I felt aware of where she was). I didnt do it long term or every night but it was a lifesaver when all other options were exhausted. Next time I think I will use a co-sleeping crib that attaches to the side of the bed so that the baby is kept separate but within easy reach.

Ah well, I never felt able to do any chemical stuff because of bf. Probably why it worked out. Either that or that I hate a hot bedroom and tended to dress my children in a t-shirt to sleep.

And FWIW, we didn't have a cot to put them back in till 18 months. But the plural of anecdote is not data.

Mooncup are those figures %ages? 12 out of 10 people know that you can't have a risk of more than 1.

No, they're made up figures for illustration! The articles I linked to are a much better read than my regurgitated garble anyway