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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Fantastic 40+ Mums To Be

999 replies

10000fireflies · 08/06/2012 20:33

A lovely shiney new thread for us to keep chatting on. Smile

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
knottyhair · 23/09/2012 16:35

ValiumQueen. 43. # DC3 for ELCS 25/10. Boy
Knottyhair 44 #DC2 due for ELCS around 17/12 Girl
Eagleray 41 # DC1 due 18/1 Girl
ClickingTock 40 #DC2 due early Jan, sex a surprise (although sonographer has probably spoiled it...)
Knickyknocks 40 # DC2 due 17/3
BadBuddha 42 #DC2 due 5/5
Onemoreforgoodmeasure 40 # DC1 due 06/06
MrsWooster, 45, DC2 due 31/3/13 (a palindrome!)
Firstbubba 43, DC1 due 2/10 suprise

Added you firstbubba Smile.

Just got back in after "popping out" at 11.30 to buy curtains & do a food shop. Ended up also choosing a fab new sofa (a corner one with 3 recliners! I'm easily pleased). I think DP is still in shock as he keeps wandering around repeating the price to himself Grin. Is "guaranteed" Hmm to be here before Christmas so fingers crossed I'll be sitting on it with Rosa and wiping vomit off it.

Hpbp · 23/09/2012 17:29

Welcome to all new ladies. It feels so weird to see due date for next year. I feel like a vey old MNer now. Times flies, I can see myself joining the thread, it feels like yesterday, but no, little Anastasia is alreafy 8 weeks today. Thrilled that firstbubba, Fjord, LRM will be graduates in a week or two !
Hey VQ how is you leg now ? Have you fully recovered ? Re contraception after birth, I had a long chat with my specialist consultant and my DH, I am now very confused, BF makes things a bit more difficult, I am giving myself a little bit of time to think about it.
Went to a massive carboot sale oday, bought for Anastasia 3 sleepsuits and a Ralph Lauren snowsuit for less than £5. So happy ! Have also sorted her baptism fo midNov with the priet. Very sctive week end, ndeed.
Hope evryone had a lovely week end

eagleray · 23/09/2012 20:33

Excellent HPBP - a fellow carboot fan! It's great coming home with a pile of stuff and change for a tenner isn't it? DP and I went to one a couple of weekends ago and it was a great education for him to look at babies' clothes and figure out what they are meant to wear (not that I have much of a clue either). I think he would have got really bored/scared in a proper baby shop but a boot sale he will look at anything if it's cheap, so we ended up rummaging in a box of bodysuits/babygros which were 10p each and I told him to choose 10. I think a lot of them are for boys as they have robots and trains on them, but it was really nice that he got into it.

I got a merino swaddle off Ebay a few days ago, and tonight I wrapped up Bugs Bunny (who is a little bit smaller than a newborn) to show DP how it was supposed to work. Then we stared at Bugs Bunny wrapped up with a matching hat and got a bit freaked out (thought I was going to cry) and so I hastily undressed Bugs and put the swaddle away!

Feeling pretty awful today and seem to seem to have got a cold (and eating even more than normal) but have a holiday in the sun to look forward to, departing next weekend. We got something very last minute in Greece, and am so excited as it will be the first time off work I have had since May which didn't involve hospital trips or funerals. Not easy finding maternity beachwear though (hard enough finding maternity things for the winter!)

Luckily there is a wifi at the hotel so I will be checking in every day to see if any babies make an appearance...

Valium - didn't understand your comment at first regarding June babies as that is nearly 6 months behind my due date and then I remembered I am nearly 6 months gone already - how did that happen?!? These last 3 months have certainly gone quicker than the first trimester (if that is any help to any of the newbies)

Midgetm · 23/09/2012 22:08

Midget 41 #DC2 Due for sweep 9/10 or ELCS 19/10

ValiumQueen. 43. # DC3 for ELCS 25/10. Boy
Knottyhair 44 #DC2 due for ELCS around 17/12 Girl
Eagleray 41 # DC1 due 18/1 Girl
ClickingTock 40 #DC2 due early Jan, sex a surprise (although sonographer has probably spoiled it...)
Knickyknocks 40 # DC2 due 17/3
BadBuddha 42 #DC2 due 5/5
Onemoreforgoodmeasure 40 # DC1 due 06/06
MrsWooster, 45, DC2 due 31/3/13 (a palindrome!)
Firstbubba 43, DC1 due 2/10 suprise

I feel like I have been away for ever - welcome to the newbies.

Eagle so glad you are getting a well deserved break - you should relax after the stresses and strains of the last few months. I am supposed to be in Ibiza this weekend (pre booked) but was too pregnant to be allowed on the plane Sad.

Knicky I didn't tell DD until I was at least 20 weeks - maybe even later. Largely because I have had so many MC's and dreaded bad news at the 20 week scan that I wanted to keep it from her as long as possible. But I have to admit also because they are rubbish at judging time and the constant 'is it here yet' would have driven me demented.

I need some advice wise old birds. My consultant wants me to have a sweep at 37 weeks with a view to induction not long after. If I decide to have ELCS she would like to try and wait till 39 weeks. Reasons are - baby is on the big side so if VBAC term is not a good idea. Last time my placenta failed so again good idea to get it out early and I developed PET last time (although no signs of this now). And of course my age. I totally trust her and she pretty much saved DD by getting her out bang on 37 weeks but I am so undecided about delivery.

I am thinking - accept sweeps and have a few to see if it can kick start things naturally - but if induction needs to be ramped up a gear into pessarys and drips then say no thanks I will have an ELCS. I am concerned about giving birth to a big baby under induction, - I do not want a EMCS and I think flat on my back with a monitor on me this makes this quite likely. I was induced with DC1 but she was tiny. I am also really worried about being cut as I have varicose veins in unpleasant places and a huge hemorrhoid so I already think my pelvic floor is taking a real beating with the size of this baby (97 centile). I am worried what a VBAC may do to me in the long term. I also had a 2 week stay after delivering DD - becasue of PET and a PPH so the recovery from a ELCS seems positively civalised to me Any wise words you can offer me would be great. I feel like I just need to decide to get my head round it either way. Help me wise ladies for I am in a spin. My induction with DD was not actually that bad really - but she was tiny and this one is not.

Sorry about the me me me post - I would really appreciate your thoughts. Big wave to you all.

FjordMor · 23/09/2012 23:14

Evening everyone & welcome to the newbies I haven't introduced myself to yet. Smile I'm just popping on as on my phone & can't read back far. Also had zero sleep last night so fighting my own eyelids to stay awake at the mo after dozing on & off all day.

Please add me to the list (I don't think I can cut & paste):
Fjordmor, 41, DC1, 1st October induction booked, it's a girl Smile.

midget I wish I did have some wise advice to give you. I dunno - if it were me, anything is preferable to an operation. But that's me. I'm being induced with a big 'un. I'm not sure why you'd need to end up on your back with an induction. I've been assured that even on a drip/monitor I'd be able to stand/be on all fours/kneeling up backwards on the bed. Even with a walking epidural. I know you're a little 'un though so I do understand your fears. I dunno, with your previous experience I'd be inclined to see the benefit of delivering this one earlier rather than later. Also, people keep telling me they rarely come out as big as the scans estimate them. That's just my tuppence worth & personal perspective though - for what it's worth & I have no previous experience to draw on like you. But then, here in pragmatic Norway, I don't even have the option of an ELCS and I'm counting on my LO to come out when coaxed as I can't even entertain the idea of a EMCS - hoping to not even get as far as a drip (apparently they'll use a balloon catheter here first... ). I suppose as a first timer, I'm just 'trusting' in the process and fumbling in blind with a 'que sera sera' shoulder shrug. Anyway, hope the decision doesn't drive you too nuts & that the right way makes itself obvious. I'm sure it will. Smile

knottyhair · 24/09/2012 05:52

Midget 41 #DC2 Due for sweep 9/10 or ELCS 19/10
ValiumQueen. 43. # DC3 for ELCS 25/10. Boy
Knottyhair 44 #DC2 due for ELCS around 17/12 Girl
Eagleray 41 # DC1 due 18/1 Girl
ClickingTock 40 #DC2 due early Jan, sex a surprise (although sonographer has probably spoiled it...)
Knickyknocks 40 # DC2 due 17/3
BadBuddha 42 #DC2 due 5/5
Onemoreforgoodmeasure 40 # DC1 due 06/06
MrsWooster, 45, DC2 due 31/3/13 (a palindrome!)
Firstbubba 43, DC1 due 2/10 suprise
Fjordmor, 41, DC1, 1st October induction booked, it's a girl

All done Fjord Smile.

somewherebecomingrain · 24/09/2012 08:02

midget i'm not an old hand at birth - only done it once. But you've only got a decision to make if there's no real risk to the baby. If there's a risk to the baby that trumps all other considerations. I couldn't work that out totally as I"m not familiar with all the terms you used, but I feel from reading what you said that you are leaning towards an ELCS.

hi there firstbubba - you are nearly there! so exciting!

hpbp the word 'car boot' is making me feel happy. you sound organised - that is such a lovely place to be!

eagleray it sounds like you're getting some great parenting practice in with your DP! He's taking some great baby steps there choosing baby clothes! Merino wrap! great. i"m trying to get isabella oliver clothes on ebay - keep losing - i have been leaving it till the last 19 seconds to put in my bid but i think you've got to leave it even later.

i had a largely lovely day yesterday seeing my sis and a good friend of ours. Five kids in one rained in living room and it was joyous mayhem.

My DS and lovely neice decided to play a game which involved running acoss the living room and jumping onto me and hugging me. bit worried that wasn't a good idea in my condition. they got so hysterical it was hard to stop them.

my dear nephew who's a bit off to the point of being a little t-r with my son announced he loved my son and they had some healthy giggling sessions.

i say largely lovely because throughout it all i had a splitting headache and nausea. praying today will be better.
xxx

Hpbp · 24/09/2012 08:10

Midget, I don't know what to say. I understand your position.
I had a sweep and it induced labour roughly 7hours later and all went well, apart from a small incision of 0.5cm, the doctor did not need any instrument to get Anastasia out, breathing and pushing worked wonder but she was an average baby of 3 kg only. Yours sounds bigger but they also get measurements wrong sometimes.
Can you start with sweeps and if they do not work, opt for ELCS ? I have no idea about EMCS, is it much worse than ELCS ?
so sorry you have to make a difficult decision. Have a rest and a tea and sorry to for Ibiza :( . Your head will be clearer.
Have to run to see MW. will catch up later.
Wave to every one

ValiumQueen · 24/09/2012 09:07

midget there are concerns about both VBAC and ELCS and it is clearly not a straightforward decision to make.

I am AMAZED they are considering inducing you having previously had a section. Utterly amazed, and that is a risk I personally would not be prepared to take.

First timers may want to skip this bit. I have experience of induction when i was overdue by 1 week, and showing signs of Pre eclampsia. With me nothing happened for two days of pessaries, until the drip, and then I went from 0-100 in seconds. I could not breathe as there was no gap between contractions. After trying to cope on gas and air, I begged them to kill me and cut the baby out. I had an epidural, which did not take first time. Once it was in, that was fine, but I could not feel my legs, and being on a drip, monitor, epidural and catheter, there was no way I could move, and even with the drip on high, I took a long time to progress. One thing led to another, and I was promised a section as baby was in distress, however theatres were busy, so she was ripped out of me, I had a huge bleed, and it was utterly terrifying. It took two hours of baby being in distress before she was born, and I thought she was going to be stillborn. I also thought I would die, and DH thought the same. Some people have a lovely story around their induction, so this is not necessarily going to happen to you.

My ELCS was wonderful. I felt that everything was very controlled, and I was able to plan and rest beforehand. I was showing signs of pre-eclampsia again, but know that I would be delivering soon, so felt safe. Siting the spinal was a lot easier without contracting, and the atmosphere was very calm. Had to wait a few hours due to emergencies, but that was just annoying, rather than terrifying like the first time. Aftercare left a bit to be desired on the pain control front, but this time I will be more confident to challenge staff. I also had shoulder pain, which was left untreated. I have peppermint oil for it this time. I was home sooner, healed quicker, and milk came in sooner with the section. Yes it is an operation, but on a well person, not for disease, and you have the lovely distraction of a baby afterwards.

With you midget, there is the concern that your placenta may fail before 39 weeks. Hopefully you will be closely monitored in relation to this. A section prior to 39 weeks is only advisable on medical grounds, which surely covers this.

A natural birth prior to 37 weeks may appear ideal, so you could have sweeps, and do all you could to start it off. You still have to consider the big baby thing, which might result in an EMCS anyway. In relation to weight estimates, they thought DD2 was 8lb on the day of the section. She was 10lb 3.

I would personally go for an ELCS, and talk to the consultant about this happening earlier, associated risks etc. if you have consented to an ELCS you could always have a trial of labour if things were to kick off before the date.

How about a thread about this in childbirth? This is just my opinion and I am not a midwife.

littleredmonkey · 24/09/2012 11:03

Morning ladies

Midget 41 #DC2 Due for sweep 9/10 or ELCS 19/10
ValiumQueen. 43. # DC3 for ELCS 25/10. Boy
Knottyhair 44 #DC2 due for ELCS around 17/12 Girl
Eagleray 41 # DC1 due 18/1 Girl
ClickingTock 40 #DC2 due early Jan, sex a surprise (although sonographer has probably spoiled it...)
Knickyknocks 40 # DC2 due 17/3
BadBuddha 42 #DC2 due 5/5
Onemoreforgoodmeasure 40 # DC1 due 06/06
MrsWooster, 45, DC2 due 31/3/13 (a palindrome!)
Firstbubba 43, DC1 due 2/10 suprise
Fjordmor, 41, DC1, 1st October induction booked, it's a girl
Littleredmonkey, 43 DC1, Due for sweep 2/10 or induction 14/10

Midget - Feel for you honey, I am having my sweep next Tuesday and possibly induced 10 days later. I have zero experience on what to say or suggest. They did say I should be induced before due date and I was not keen so agreeded to the sweep. Just go with what you think is best for little un and yourself. Valium Queen makes some good points and best to keep on at your consultant. When is your next appointment to see him/her?

Valium - Did not follow your advise and read your warning for first timers. Holy crap that sounded terrible experience for ya but on a positive spin you went and had another and expecting another. You win my brave as hell award for the week !!. Did you feel it was happening so fast you did not get a say ? I am worried sick about the day when it all kicks off. The nearer it gets the less sleep I get . Partner is working so sat at home and it seems every stab of pain makes me think oh is this it !! Operation Dylan is on !!!!! My mum and dad came earlier and she was telling me in 1969 when she had me and my twin brother she has no drugs, no gas or air and we just popped out within an hour of arrival at the hospital and within 5 mins of each other. No mess no fuss. The dream. Thousands of sorrys to the ladies who are new or not so far down the line with my wooes.

Hpbp - Anastasia is 8 weeks already !!!! time is flying

Fjord - Little girl is soon here. What ya doing with your last week of freedom ? I am sat on my sofa looking out the window as it is raining like mad. Our local council has decided today is a splendid day to have to cut down trees, bless they are wet from head to toe. ps This walking epidural that you mentioned please explain a bit more please ?

Firstbubba - What your plans for the week ? I have a couple of friends coming Tuesday for coffee and Wednesday another has invited me for lunch, Thursday film day Friday MW so I can look wided eyed at her while see tell me not to PANIC !! Saturday partner has a plan to get things going bless, walking and some more walking, curry for tea ( yum ) . Pineapple and some more and that gross red leaf tea. He thinks it would be nicer for me then the sweep.Ha ha aha . Bless him .

Eagleray - Hope you feel better and your cold is going ?xx

Knottyhair - Good girl nothing like going out shopping and coming back with a a sofa !!! You made me smile. I went into Primark on Saturday just to get some jim jams that fit for a few months and found a very large pair of mens xxl trackie bottoms for £5 , boo that they fit , but yeh that they do.

ValiumQueen · 24/09/2012 12:29

littlered I did not want to upset anyone. It is important to remember that I was overdue, with signs of pre-eclampsia, that the hospital largely ignored. I was 37 so getting on a bit too. The best indication of what your labour will be like is to see how your mum got on. I would say you should be very encouraged in that respect.

My mum chose not to tell me the truth. She had preeclampsia and was induced, but did not want to worry me. Had I known this, I may have been better prepared.

The communication was appalling at the hospital, and this made a lot of difference. I could see from the trace the baby was in distress, then they were saying she was fine. I did not have the benefit of MN then.

At one point they asked me if I wanted a section, and I said yes. They then asked DH what he thought, and he said he was not medically trained and supported his wife's decision so why were they asking him? Two hours six minutes later DD was born.

I went for a debriefing when she was 8 months old, which helped a bit. It was only moving to a different country away from those bastards that enabled me to consider any more. I still get tearful talking or thinking about it and it was 6 years ago.

My recommendation to all first timers is to be as informed as possible, and be open to any eventuality. My birth plan was for a water birth with gas and air, and I felt such a failure. Still do tbh. Such a lot is made of the birth, but in the whole parenting scheme of things all that really matters is that it happens, how is not really important, yet women still continue to crucify themselves and others about it.

ValiumQueen · 24/09/2012 12:33

Perhaps bastards is a bit harsh. I do feel very upset though that had they told me what was happening, things would have been a lot easier to manage. There was one MW who was an absolute witch though.

littleredmonkey · 24/09/2012 13:33

Valium - Oh lord honey you did not upset me at all, its good to hear all balanced stories about child birth. Most of my friends are You'll be fine, you will have no issues you are health. I would rather have all view points to be honest. I did ask my mum as it was the 60's and said we just slid out was she stoned Hahaha. She laughed and NO!!!
I hope I dont get a witch of a MW, I bet there was nothing worse, when you are so vulnerable the last thing you expect , you need support and understanding. I have gone through the birth plan with partner and he will have my back, but if you dont have any medical training it must be overwhelming. We have got a few hand signals if I am in distress. My birth plan is open really. Only things I do want is dim lighting and an epidural, the path it will take I will go with the flow, just hoping for the easiest path, fingers crossed. I keep saying to myself you'll be fine , but that little negative seed that creeps up on us all starts chatting away especially in the wee hours.

Ps - It will be lovely to be able to roll over in bed at pace rather then trying to turn like oil tanker !!!

somewherebecomingrain · 24/09/2012 15:42

VQ that's an awful story. I had a failed induction and an EMCS and it was much better - no pain or discomfort and i was confident the docs knew what they were doing. so don't worry newbies.

I am so sick today.

xxx

Hpbp · 24/09/2012 15:45

LRM, I am with you re rolling in bed, the only thing is when the time of feeding comes, my boobs are so big than I can't really lie on my tummy or on the side... How ironic is that ?! But apart from that, yes it is nice to be back in our body !

littleredmonkey · 24/09/2012 16:12

Somwhere - Hope you feel better soon. xx

knottyhair · 24/09/2012 16:49

Valium, your story sounds horrific, I'm not surprised you still get tearful my love. Somewhere, you poor thing, I really hope you start to feel better soon.

Cadmum · 24/09/2012 16:56

Oh no... I have a scan on Wednesday and have only been lurking as I am full of head cold and feeling generally blue. Please can somebody put me back in the stats? I feel ridiculously superstitious for seeing it as a bad omen that I am already off the list... Due April 6 with dc#5. Thanks.

Onemoreforgoodmeasure · 24/09/2012 17:07

Valium, another first timer here, I like to be in the know. I'm grateful you talked about that. I'm so sorry though, how hideous.

Midget 41 #DC2 Due for sweep 9/10 or ELCS 19/10
ValiumQueen. 43. # DC3 for ELCS 25/10. Boy
Knottyhair 44 #DC2 due for ELCS around 17/12 Girl
Eagleray 41 # DC1 due 18/1 Girl
ClickingTock 40 #DC2 due early Jan, sex a surprise (although sonographer has probably spoiled it...)
Knickyknocks 40 # DC2 due 17/3
Cadmum DC #5 due 06/04
BadBuddha 42 #DC2 due 5/5
Onemoreforgoodmeasure 40 # DC1 due 06/06
MrsWooster, 45, DC2 due 31/3/13 (a palindrome!)
Firstbubba 43, DC1 due 2/10 suprise
Fjordmor, 41, DC1, 1st October induction booked, it's a girl
Littleredmonkey, 43 DC1, Due for sweep 2/10 or induction 14/10
Wink

littleredmonkey · 24/09/2012 18:27

Welcome
Onemore & Cadmum - Welcome to the oldies but sooooooo very friendly gang. Fab group of ladies and have helped me so much over the last 8 months.

Onemoreforgoodmeasure · 24/09/2012 19:08

I've reorganised us by due date!

Fjordmor, 41, DC1, 1st October induction booked, it's a girlFirstbubba 43, DC1 due 2/10 suprise
Littleredmonkey, 43 DC1, Due for sweep 2/10 or induction 14/10Midget 41 #DC2 Due for sweep 9/10 or ELCS 19/10
ValiumQueen. 43. # DC3 for ELCS 25/10. Boy
Knottyhair 44 #DC2 due for ELCS around 17/12 Girl
Eagleray 41 # DC1 due 18/1 Girl
ClickingTock 40 #DC2 due early Jan, sex a surprise (although sonographer has probably spoiled it...)
Knickyknocks 40 # DC2 due 17/3
MrsWooster, 45, DC2 due 31/3/13 (a palindrome!)
Cadmum DC #5 due 06/04
BadBuddha 42 #DC2 due 5/5
Onemoreforgoodmeasure 40 # DC1 due 06/06

ValiumQueen · 24/09/2012 19:14

She is worth it (little rascal) Thank you for your kind comments.

Hpbp · 24/09/2012 19:19

Thanks Onemore for reorganising by due date. it seems that October will be busy ! 5 little angels in a few weeks... I am getting vey emotional, just feeling so happy for you all and very glad to have spent a few moments of this journey with you. We had ups and downs but it was great and still is.
Eagle, hey hey, holidays coming up, you deserve to have quiet time... I am soooooo jealous !
Somewhere, crossed posts earlier, will this MS leave you alone ? I feel for you.

ValiumQueen · 24/09/2012 19:25

midget and firstbubba seem to have fallen off the list.

somewherebecomingrain · 24/09/2012 19:40

good one onemore I was itching to do this - it's just the formatting: here
also put myself on there.

Fjordmor, 41, DC1, 1st October induction booked, it's a girl
Firstbubba 43, DC1 due 2/10 suprise
Littleredmonkey, 43 DC1, Due for sweep 2/10 or induction 14/10
Midget 41 #DC2 Due for sweep 9/10 or ELCS 19/10
ValiumQueen. 43. # DC3 for ELCS 25/10. Boy
Knottyhair 44 #DC2 due for ELCS around 17/12 Girl
Eagleray 41 # DC1 due 18/1 Girl
ClickingTock 40 #DC2 due early Jan, sex a surprise (although sonographer has probably spoiled it...)
Knickyknocks 40 # DC2 due 17/3
somewherebecomingrain 40 #DC2 11/4
MrsWooster, 45, DC2 due 31/3/13 (a palindrome!)
Cadmum DC #5 due 06/04
BadBuddha 42 #DC2 due 5/5
Onemoreforgoodmeasure 40 # DC1 due 06/06

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