What's the stupidest advice/comments you have received about pregnancy or childrearing

[Garliccheesechips]

Sorry if this has been done lots of times before (had a search to no avail) but I'm wondering if anyone had encountered jaw-droppingly ridiculous advice from medics/family/friends/colleagues etc when they were up the duff?

A (slightly batty and worryingly skinny) colleague told me that throwing up was a great way to lose the baby weight postpartum so long as you don't 'rely on it too much'.

To stop making a fuss about getting the flu, a healthy young pregnant woman like me would recover from it in no time and anti-virals were a faddish thing for Americans and not required in my situation.

The baby died.

Oh how awful BoffinMum :(

Quite.
Bloody bastard GP. Round here the women used to call him Dr Death. Luckily he's now retired. Arrogant as ever, though.

My mother warned me about making a rod for my own back when I picked my baby up because she was crying when she was 3 days old and we were still in hospital.

With DS1 (now 23), I was told to eat lots of liver whilst pregnant (for the vitamin A and because i was anaemic) and always put him to sleep on his tummy because if he slept on his back then he might choke to death. Funny how advice changes isn't it?

my dh had a taste. he said it was very sweet a bit like a milkshake

My arsehole of a father came round the first day I was at home alone with DC1 (and already struggling) and he told me to "stop responding to his needs (the baby's!) so quickly or he'd grow to expect it. And an adult who expects his needs to all be met is a psychopath."

And when we told him that we weren't going to be hitting our children by way of discipline he said "but how will he learn?"

boffinMum OMG I'm so sorry! Bloody good thing he's retired...me might find a load of angry mumsnetters out to get him (and still might, firing up my pitchfork as I type) otherwise.

My Mum said the only old wives tale she obeyed was not to stretch up to hang out washing. She said it was said to be in case the cord was round the baby's neck and the reaching up strangled it.

My MIL gave me the same advice, and said that failing to follow it was what had resulted in her first DC being stillborn.

I obeyed it. I thought it was disrespectful to MIL not to, even though I don't think it's true.

Worst three:

1. (whilst pregnant) you should take up smoking so you'll have a smaller baby and a smaller baby will mean an easier birth.
2. (2 weeks following birth) what awful stretch marks, had you looked after yourself in pregnancy and not put on so much weight, you would not have had them.
3. (2 weeks following birth and struggling to breast feed). Why do you bother? Just put her on a bottle and save yourself the trouble. Anyway, only those who can't afford powered milk breastfeed.

The person who made the above comments back in 2004/2005 has never allowed back in my home.

One person made all three comments?!

Christ on a bike.

I was told that if I stuck my arms in the air the umbilical cord would strangle the baby

Fortunately I didn't believe MIL the person who told me.

Yes. The same person made all three. The last 2 comments were almost one after the other. I was breast feeding at the time, and I had stretch marks on my breasts.

"you're not producing enough milk, have you thought about having some guinness?"

This was from HV when dd was weeks old, feeding spectacularly well and I had what was later diagnosed as PND-then the HV wondered why I'd not let her over the door!

"well thats a battle won" - uncle when i picked up my distressed 5 week old DS.

I pointed out that I wasn't actually at war with my son

Mil 'you do realise the baby will be allergic to all animal hair so no letting him near your horses & he'll probably have asthma & you shouldn't let them near wheat just in case' dh had an asthma attack as a teenager & blamed his friends dog rather than the copious amounts they had been smoking! Mil has a slight sensitivity to wheat but you would think it could kill her. She even told me cutting out wheat would cure my hyperemesis! Wheat??! I couldn't even keep water down.

The one about not putting your arms above your head because it might strangle the baby... erm, I would have thought this was impossible as the baby is not actually breathing with its lungs when it is inside you, and the nutrition comes from the placenta and not via the mouth? Or am I the one being daft?

Oh loads of stupid 'helpful tips'.
DON'T drink ANY alcohol at ALL. I was pregnant during the summer & over Christmas. I drank spritzers - with lots of soda.
DON'T eat peanut butter because it will cause an allergy. Ate peanut butter all through pregnancy. DD has NO allergies.
DON'T eat curry, especially when you're breastfeeding as the baby won't like the taste. But I eat curry regularly and am still breastfeeding DD who has managed pretty well so far (and tried some Korma last week with relish)
DON'T do any strenuous exercise as it'll harm the baby. I used to go to a regular dance class, and danced right up to 8 months pg.
DON'T keep your cats after the baby is born because it will be allergic to them/it will be unhygienic. Sorry, but the cats were here first, I was not going to rehome them. They all get on very well. (Until DD tries to sit on them).

I would say at least 90% of advice I was given was total and utter bollocks.

My work colleagues dw had a new years baby, and is breastfeeding. Her midwife told her to stop bf, and start ff, as bf is more easily digested and it will make the baby hungrier and attention seeking!

I was told last week to eat plenty of liver for iron by a nurse at the ante-natal clinc...I'm 33 weeks pregnant. She said oh you'll just need the extra iron. I said but what about the advice to avoid it, she said, I ate lots of iron and there is nothing wrong with my three.

the one with 'the arms over the head' is only half a myth. myth is that the 'cord gets tangled' but many pregnant women have funny blood pressure and holding arm up could make you feel faint. I fainted in the tube when I didn't know yet that I was pregnant. was standing up holding on to rod above my head...

I'm gobsmacked at how many of these have come from hcp's!

I've not really had any advice that I can think of, everyone around me has been pretty good. Bit disappointed actually!

Yes, my mother goes mad if she sees me reach above my head because it'll wrap the cord round the baby's neck. Silly woman... :)

Red2011 - I like your one of "DON'T keep your cats after the baby is born because it will be allergic to them/it will be unhygienic. Sorry, but the cats were here first, I was not going to rehome them. They all get on very well. (Until DD tries to sit on them)." I have a cat (since she was a kitten - nearly 8 y/o) and anyone who thinks that my dear kitty will be going to stay with my mum can go & whistle. She's very well behaved with children and has coped admirably with my (13y/o & 5y/o) DSS's since she moved in a year ago. She likes to supervise as well, so will probably just find a convenient spot to sit & watch LO unless LO is noisy (in which case, she'll probably bugger off to a bedroom for a nap).