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Original poster

Wow; it's only circumcision..

781 replies

Chloejp91 · 29/12/2010 22:11

Before I get killed, I'm not suggesting it is only circumsion, that's just the title of this thread.

I'm due in less than 4 weeks and I'm having a boy. I'm definitely going to circumcise him. It's part of my culture and my partner's culture so it's going to be done. I just feel sad that it's seen as such a bad thing, where there are some benefits to it.

Anyone circumsised/circumsizing their sons?

OP posts:
ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo · 30/12/2010 01:45

chloe will you involve your partner in your research and findings?

ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo · 30/12/2010 01:47

FWIW i was painfully naive about the way of the world until i joined MN.

i didn't have a clue about BFing, feminism, my rights to return to work, how to stand up to a controlling man.

i have larned alot here and it really has improved mine and my children's lives.

Original poster
Chloejp91 · 30/12/2010 01:48

GenevieveHawkings oh no he's not as traditional or patriachal as some. In fact he sees the world differently. His generation of men are not as patriachal as their father's generation. Some things still stands but women aren't subserviant and in the background as perseved.

ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo yes I will involve him indeed.

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloejp91 · 30/12/2010 01:50

Perceived*

OP posts:
KickArseQueen · 30/12/2010 01:53

Chloe, I'm glad you are actually opening your eyes and looking at the reality and magnitude of you decision.

There is some information here on the type of circumcision you are considering.

Have you watched the video yet?

earwicga · 30/12/2010 01:53

'If your DP is African and only relatively recently arrived in the UK he will be very patriarchal and expect women to defer to men.'

Eh? Reaching much? Perhaps so, perhaps not. Not a good thing to make generalisations like this with stereotypes.

Your point re circumcision is good GenevieveHawkings, don't ruin it with racism.

KickArseQueen · 30/12/2010 01:54

I have to go as my son has woken..

GenevieveHawkings · 30/12/2010 01:58

I'm bowing out now as got to head off to bed but ChloeJP I truly hope that you and your enlightened African "new" man can make a stand against this barbarous ritual child abuse and keep your baby safe from pain and suffering by leaving his penis intact.

Instead, as he grows, teach your son to clean his penis properly and he will have no problems with it.

Far from blaming you for not circumcising him when he's older, he'll be able to enjoy more pleasurable sensations sexually because his foreskin will not have been removed thereby rendering his penis largely desensitised. His penis will aesthetically look much better too - just as nature intended it to be.

expatinscotland · 30/12/2010 01:59

'3 Cancer of the cervix in women is due to the Human Papilloma Virus. It thrives under and on the foreskin from where it can be transmitted during intercourse. An article in the British Medical Journal in April 2002 suggested that at least 20% of cancer of the cervix would be avoided if all men were circumcised. Surely that alone makes it worth doing?'

I'm from the US, where, in my generation at least (I'm 40 next February), most men are circumsiced.

Yet I still contracted two strains of HPV implicated in the development of cervical cancer and was treated for cervical dysplasia.

Original poster
Chloejp91 · 30/12/2010 01:59

KickArseQueen the rabbi technique sure as hell is putting me off with the downsides!

Risk of partial trauma and cuts to the glans (head of penis)

There is, often, a vaseline bandage that must be changed every day for seven days. (I was aware of this) Uncomfortable for parents and painful for children.but not this

High risk of bleeding and / or infection if the bandage is not correctly and cleanly removed and re-applied every day.

Unsightly scars and excess foreskin are common due to lack of precision.

As it is a quick technique, some practitioners do not pay enough attention to the efficiency of the pain relief method, leaving the child with an excruciating pain when the foreskin is cut.

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloejp91 · 30/12/2010 02:01

expatinscotland sorry to hear that, I was just pasting information from a website. I guess you can never be too safe then..

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloejp91 · 30/12/2010 02:02

expatinscotland sorry to hear that, I was just pasting information from a website. I guess you can never be too sure then..

OP posts:
GenevieveHawkings · 30/12/2010 02:02

Errr, excuse me earwicga. I'm no racist thank you. My parter is from a different race than me and my child is mixed race.

The point I made is completely pertinent and valid in the context of the discussion we're having here.

Please don't resort to lazy, uninformed slurs.

ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo · 30/12/2010 02:02

chloe i am so glad you are going into this now with your eyes open. look at what little you have found out already about your chosen method of circumcision. especially that last line. can you imagine if you hadn't read those links and then found them after you had gotten the Op done? how terrible would you feel for your baby?

Original poster
Chloejp91 · 30/12/2010 02:05

To be honest I'm quite shocked, especially at "some practitioners do not pay enough attention to the efficiency of the pain relief method, leaving the child with an excruciating pain when the foreskin is cut." I assumed that because they did it all the time it'd be safer to go to a rabbi.

I'll continue researching anyway and share with my OH and basically take it from there.

OP posts:
earwicga · 30/12/2010 02:09

GenevieveHawkings - You made the 'lazy, uninformed slur' and I had read the thread thank you. You have decided that a Nigerian man, here for 3 years, is 'very patriarchal and expect women to defer to men'. Perhaps he is, perhaps he isn't. You don't know and are resorting to a stereotype.

GenevieveHawkings · 30/12/2010 02:16

Earwig maybe I made an assumption based on some degree of cultural stereotyping (and no small degree of personal experience based on things I've observed) but that is not the same as being a racist.

You called me a racist and I am not. Therefore you made a lazy, uninformed slur.

earwicga · 30/12/2010 02:20

I actually didn't call you a racist. But don't worry about it, this thread isn't about whether or not you are a racist.

FrameyMcFrame · 30/12/2010 02:26

Please get your facts straight.
''This programme showed how the infection thrived in the lining of the foreskin, making it much easier to pass on.''

H.I.V is not an 'infection' that could 'thrive' anywhere. It is a virus passed by blood and to a lesser extent other body fluids.

What a load of bollox.

earwicga · 30/12/2010 02:33

Framey - HIV/AIDS programmes are indeed taking into account studies which showed a lower incidence in populations where circumcision is the norm. I think it's hideous. Condoms and education would be much more effective.

FrameyMcFrame · 30/12/2010 02:36

I'm sure they are but HIV is a virus not an infection.
It is passed through bodily fluids not un-circumcised penises.

babynelly2010 · 30/12/2010 02:47

Hm interesting tread...
My believe is that the son's penis should look like his father's, therefore if the father is circumcised the son should be to.
I am currently pregnant with a daughter but if I had a son I would arrange a circumcision for him while he is an infant. Now... because this is not a common practice in the UK (and in my country it is) I would not have NHS do it (not sure if they actually do do it) and would research which private providers I can use. I think benefits of circumcision are something to consider and quite honestly, I believe being circumcised as an infant for preventive reasons is much less traumatic than actually being circumcised at the age of 6 or 9 for medical reasons.

FrameyMcFrame · 30/12/2010 02:51

My ex was circumcised and he was very resentful about it.
He felt he was missing out on something and used to get quite upset and self conscious about it.

GColdtimer · 30/12/2010 02:54

This thread has really opened my eyes to this issue. I would heartily back a campaign to stop this barbaric practice but I fear the communities it would affect are just too powerful. If you did this to a dog it would be deemed as abuse and you would likely be banned from keeping them.

Well done op for keeping an open mind about this. When you imagine holding your precious, beautiful little boy in your arms can you also imagine handing him over to a butcher with a knife to cause him unimaginable pain? As a new mother you will feel like a lioness with a cub and will instinctively feel like you would lay your own life down to protect him. Seeing your child in pain is agony, it really is. Too be the cause of this is just something I cannot fathom and hopefully you will feel this way too.

GColdtimer · 30/12/2010 03:02

Babynelly have you actually read the thread? Have you watched the video? Why on earth do you think a child's penis should look like his father's? What a ridiculous notion. There is a reason why the nhs do this as an absolute last resort for medical reasons. What on earth are you trying to prevent? We evolved to have a foreskin for a reason. None of the arguements for it stack up. And certainly are not strong enough to justify causing immense pain and trauma to a helpless baby who cannot communicate their pain. For a parent to willingly inflict this on their child really does begged belief.

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