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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

It's just not working - my fault. Would no nappies at all work?

41 replies

DollarDollarBills · 06/01/2014 08:40

I posted in behaviour as well but we've been potty training 2 yo for about 2 months now and although she's done some wees in the toilet at nursery she never has at home, and has now started pooing in the bath.

It's my fault as I've been so overwhelmed with having 4 month old ds as well that I've not been taking her to the toilet every 30mins like nursery do and when she's in pull ups she just uses them like nappies.

I do ask her if she needs the toilet throughout the day though and always met with a no, unless she just wants to sit on it for fun.

I'm thinking of today just taking her out of nappies completely with the exception of bedtime and naptime and just putting her in underpants and taking her to the toilet every 30 mins.

What do you think?

OP posts:

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ASmidgeofMidge · 06/01/2014 08:43

Could you wait? Sounds like she may not be ready, especially if you're asking her about whether she needs the loo and she's saying no, and if you're having to take her every 30 mins....
I can understand not wanting 2 in nappies but might be best to hang fire for a while and revisit in a few months' time?

ASmidgeofMidge · 06/01/2014 08:46

Fwiw I think pull-ups can be quite confusing as your dd won't get the sensation of being wet/dirty. So if you want to continue Id definitely go for normal knickers. But as above , my instinct from reading your OP is that she might need a bit longer to be ready.

MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 06/01/2014 08:47

It's what worked for me - tried with pull-ups with DS1 with little success until he had a reaction to the elastic in one brand and we had to go completely commando because his poor backside was bright red. It worked far better. Pull-ups don't feel any different as far as I could see, whereas weeing when in underwear or naked is noticable. I think it does depend on how ready the child is as well. If you can, the later the better.

TheGreatHunt · 06/01/2014 08:48

Why not leave it until the weather improves. I trained ds when his baby sister was 6-8 months and it was much easier as she could be put down.

I also didn't ask him if he wanted it, I would tell him to try and wee (he'd always say no even now at 4 when he's clearly busting!!!!). Poos were different.

Jaynebxl · 06/01/2014 08:49

How old is she exactly? I agree that sje may not be ready. My ds decided for himself at 2 and a half but my dd was almost 3 before she was ready. In both cases it was so easy because they were ready and my dd in particular never had any accidents. Often I think we as parents are ready before they are!

JabberJabberJay · 06/01/2014 08:53

How old is she? Do you think she is really ready to potty train? Or do you just feel you 'should'?

Two months is quite a long time to try without success IMO.

I waited until my DD was 2.8 then nappies came off, knickers went on and she was reliably dry during the day in a weekend.

Original poster

DollarDollarBills · 06/01/2014 08:58

She's 2.1. Nursery made a point of how other children in her class were potty trained and it seems everyone else's children this age seem to be potty training or trained. I felt encouraged when she did 2 -3 wees at nursery but isn't keen at home. She loves sitting on the toilet though she thinks it's fun, but won't actually go wee.

I think pull ups are. Waste as well, she can't tell the difference and they're not as absorbent so seems pointless.

OP posts:

ginaaharris · 06/01/2014 09:01

Sounds like you are having a rough time!

In our experience training our little guy at around 22 months, no nappies at all definitely was the best way- it minimised confusion- no question, he just had to use the potty or have an accident.

We read an ebook called Oh Crap Potty training (just google it), which had heaps of advice and troubleshooting tips for almost every imaginable issue. Her approach might not be the way everyone wants to do things, but we liked her idea and having a 'method' to guide us, and most importantly it worked brilliantly for our little guy. You'd get a sense if its your cup of tea from the general info on the website. Good luck whatever you decide to do!

Jaynebxl · 06/01/2014 09:02

That's very early. Don't let the nursery pressurise you into doing it when it suits them rather than when it suits you and your dc.

Jaynebxl · 06/01/2014 09:03

O and we never bothered with pull ups. I don't think they help at all.

curlew · 06/01/2014 09:05

She's absolutely not ready. It's no use trying until the are. Relax, back to nappies and try again in 6 months. Tell nursery that yes, maybe others are potty trained but your dd isn't. Tell her she's too busy learning more important and interesting things.....

curlew · 06/01/2014 09:06

Sorry. Tell them, not her!

FalalalalalalaFiggy · 06/01/2014 09:10

Why is everyone in such a rush these days (not aimed at you OP) my DS is 2.1 and he's nowhere near he says wee wee and poo in potty but doesn't mean he's ready just that he's starting to learn the language. It doesn't sound like she's ready to me don't be pressurised by nursery at all.

My cm says not to try for at least another 6mo when the weather is good and honestly because I'm not looking forward to it or the washing that will inevitably come with it I am leaving it as long as I can.

juule · 06/01/2014 09:11

I agree with Curlew. Put her back in nappies for 6m and then try again.
She could be dry in a week or 2 at that point rather than struggling for months until she's dry at the same point anyway. Just means that both of you skip the stress. And being put on the toilet/potty every 30mins sounds like a waste of everyone's time, including your dd who could be enjoying nursery playing.

georgedawes · 06/01/2014 09:14

That's early! My dd was nearly 3 and trained in a week as she was ready. You're not failing, she's just too young!

Twinsplusonesurprise · 06/01/2014 09:16

Actually I would do what you suggest. No nappies, big girl pants and put her on the potty every 20 mins or so. IMO asking doesn't work. They are too engrossed so will always say no.
It took my twin DDs 5 days. First 2 days horrid then 3 with lots of accidents then fine - few accidents from time to time but the hard work was done. They soon learn the sensation of needing to go and now, at 2.5 they go by themselves (which is godsend as I have little DS too!)
Good luck!

SeaDevilscanPlay · 06/01/2014 09:17

2.1 is very, very early.

What are nursery doing to help?

whereisthewitch · 06/01/2014 09:18

My DD is 2.4 and still not ready. ..I'd leave her a while.

curlew · 06/01/2014 09:19

I would hate a nursery to be wasting time taking children to the loo every 30 minutes!

17leftfeet · 06/01/2014 09:19

God 2.1 she's still a baby!

Put her back in nappies and wait a bit -if children are ready they will do it in days not months

CJones1982 · 06/01/2014 09:29

It won't happen until she is ready and on her say so! My DS is 3.3 years and still not ready. Sure enough I get digs from family etc but I've tried and tried since around this age. Some children get it on the early side like walking some are later. I really wouldn't worry and like others have said put her back in nappies for 6 months and let her enjoy learning other things.

Iworrymyselftosleep · 06/01/2014 09:33

That's very early. DS trained in a week at 3.1. Two weeks after doing it he managed a 15 hr journey without an accident - absolutely no problems whatsoever. No reminding him no hassle no accidents.

When she's ready it'll be easy...

Frusso · 06/01/2014 09:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

givemeaclue · 06/01/2014 09:37

Sounds too young/ not ready. Leave it 6 months

Iworrymyselftosleep · 06/01/2014 09:37

Meant to add - I felt the potty training fear that every child is trained at two and in the end gave up. DS had a friend f the same age who started potty training at 1.10 as his mum decided he was advanced. Now, at 3.6 he's still having accidents repeatedly (three wees in two hours last time he was here) as he hasn't got it at all. I spent ages feeling awful cos he was being trained but now I'm quite pleased I let my DS come to it when he was ready...

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