Why would you wait till 2 years old?

[JingleJangle7]

I was just cruising for tips such as when will my 14 month old be able to hold in wees for more than 1/2h (she does at some times of the day) everyone elses kids seem to be much older which I find quite wierd.

We started putting DD on the potty at 4 months because I got fed up of scraping poo off her back every morning and from 13 months she's been in towelling trainer pants even at creche. We're good with poo (mainly), I think we have a more than 50% wee in potty rate and she's dry at naps. We have a lot of accidents but we're learning as she gains control. Now what we need is for her to tell us when she needs to go.
Toddlers really did used to get trained at 12-18 months (>90% by 18 months in the 1950s) in the days of terry towelling nappies that mum had to wash. Nappies cost a forture, why do most people seem to wait so long scrapping poo of bums for years longer than they need to? I don't mean to be patronising, I'm just baffled.

That was just in response to OP btw!

Most people who do EC use nappies part time as well so they aren't cleaning poo out of carpets. If you are lucky enough to get your 5 month old to poo over a potty/bowl/toilet etc then it is easier because you can just flush or tip it away and maybe wipe the baby once.

I know someone who does it with DC3 and seems to manage quite well. It's just horses for courses really.

Most people who do EC use nappies part time as well so they aren't cleaning poo out of carpets. If you are lucky enough to get your 5 month old to poo over a potty/bowl/toilet etc then it is easier because you can just flush or tip it away and maybe wipe the baby once.

I know someone who does it with DC3 and seems to manage quite well. It's just horses for courses really.

If you work full time then it simply isn't practical to do EC. Because using a potty 50% of the time isn't acceptable for anyone other than a parent to deal with. It's a luxury if you are an SAHM (although perhaps luxury isn't the right word :o)

When I looked up about it all the websites said that you can do it part time and have them in nappies at nursery/childminder etc. The argument being that children are very aware of being in different environments with different caregivers etc. Most of my friends with DC in nursery tell me they think their child is completely different for the nursery staff.

sheep i can have a go at answering that for you based on my personal experience

We started ec with ds when he was 13wks. Easy catches to start with (that build the association with the hold and weeing) include just after waking. Within a fortnight min ds was pooing only when offered the potty. I don't know how, i was tbh a bit of a sceptic when we started. I hold him over the loo when i get up each morning and he poos. No coercion of any type in spite of what other posts have implied. And no cleaning up.

If the op is talking about ec it's unhelpful to conflate it with conventional toilet training.

I don't know if ds will train relivitly early or not, though lots of ec kids do. He's only seven months now. Many days we only have one or two wets so round the house i've started putting him in washable swim nappies which are easier to get on and off and wash and dry easily. It takes moments to potty him and then i know that he's dry for a while. (I have heard other ec-ers say "I hope when i am old and have imperfect bladder control someone will show me a similar courteousy")

sheep i can have a go at partly aanswering that for you based on my personal experience

We started ec with ds when he was 13wks. Easy catches to start with (that build the association with the hold and weeing) include just after waking. Within a fortnight min ds was pooing only when offered the potty. I don't know how, i was tbh a bit of a sceptic when we started. I hold him over the loo when i get up each morning and he poos. No coercion of any type in spite of what other posts have implied. And no cleaning up. For me it is an easier and cleaner way of dealing with poo and wee so with any future dc's i'll definatly be doing ec again.

If the op is talking about ec it's unhelpful to conflate it with conventional toilet training.

I don't know if ds will train relivitly early or not, though lots of ec kids do. He's only seven months now. Many days we only have one or two wets so round the house i've started putting him in washable swim nappies which are easier to get on and off and wash and dry easily. It takes moments to potty him and then i know that he's dry for a while. (I have heard other ec-ers say "I hope when i am old and have imperfect bladder control someone will show me a similar courteousy")

We ec and our child wears training pants at the childminder's. She used to offer him the potty purely on timing, since 20 months he takes her hand and pulls her to the potty. At home he wears legwarmers and a long t shirt and uses the potty independently. We have more accidents than you'd expect with a fully potty trained child but we've hard floors and prefer wiping these to having him in nappies. He has been dry at night since around a year and doesn't wear a nappy in bed. We have occasional accidents but they are rare and have happened only when he's eaten dairy (think it irritates his bladder).

Each to their own.

Well, DS is 3 in January, and still in nappies.

We have had a few attempts at toilet training, but he is not ready, and I am not going to force the issue.

I want him to be ready, as I hope he will do it much quicker.

Mind you, I think I also wanted to get 16 months DD past the crawling stage!!

A few aborted attempts at potty training, have led to ds holding and holding and holding it in, till it was glaringly obvious he needed to go, and was getting upset, refusing to use the potty, and then we had to put a nappy on him, so he would go!

So, we have the potty in the living room, let him run around naked, sit on it when he wants to and try to entice him with robot/dinosaur pants and see where we get!

ladybiscuits we ec and just put ds in a nappy when we need to (and when we don't it certainly doesn't take 50% of the time). It's not ment to be a rod for your own back. He's fine to go in his nappy when we can't potty him like on car journeys etc

As bertie say's part time works too. Even just popping them on a potty when you change them, and i think most people would be open to doing that if asked nicely.

We went on a ferry for several days and couldn't potty him more than twice or three times a day but when we got home he was straight back in to it no problems. So i have no worries on this front about going back to work part time when my mat leave is up.

Bertie/moonfacemama - Given that I work full time, as I said, my DS is being looked after by someone else 10 hours a day, 5 days a week. So he gets a couple of hours with me either end of the day and weekends. I can't see how you can teach a child EC in that time when they are wearing nappies the rest of the time.

there are ec forums such as bornready (sorry can't link on phone) where you could get tips ladybiscuit. Other people have told me it is possible to ec part time, ie when working full time though i don't have personal experience. And as i said some people ec simply by offering a potty when they change nappies. Ec certainly isn't the all or nothing full time occupation some people think it is, but it isn't for everyone and that's fair enough.

MFM - thanks, that's really kind. I have to confess that my DS is already potty trained so this is an entirely hypothetical conversation :o

I was just on the other thread which sparked this one so just wanted to make that point really. :)

I was just going to say what MFM said :)

('failed' EC-er here anyway )

Well, because you have spent over a year putting a child on a potty. It's a lot of work and a pain in the arse potty training.

I would rather it took 2 months, not 18 months! It's taken you over a year and you only have a 50% wee success rate!

I hadn't realised another thread had sparked this one!

Because they arn't ready! No amount of potty training will work unless the child is physically and psychology ready. Some are ready at 18 months, some towards 4, they all get there in the end, don't concern yourself with what is not your business. Its people like you that put immense pressure on parents to potty train babies before they are mature enough, hence it does not work out and you end up with stressed kids with toiletig issues and stressed parents.

As other people have said, there is absolutely no necessity to damage friends' cream carpets!

Just use nappies as a backup!

There are draw-backs and advantages to everything- the important thing is to pick the set you think is better for your family.

I chose EC, and I'm glad I did. Friend chose 100% nappy use, and I expect they're happy with that too. I personally can't quite understand it, same as I can't understand why she likes beetroot. Doesn't mean there's anything necessarily wrong with it, just means we're different people.

Get me?

DD is almost 3 and started potty training (again) yesterday. The last time she got extremely constipated and was worryingly ill so we stopped.

Yesterday she had plenty of accidents and one success (following a bribe with TV). Today she had NO wees whatsoever until just now - so she has held it in for EIGHT hours. I think this means she´s choosing not to wee at all but suddenly she can´t help herslf and - ACCIDENT. So the problem is not just that she is physically incapable of holding it in.

Another major problem: she generally refuses to sit on the potty at all and is put there kicking and screaming briefly and taken off agin. If she wants to she can take off her clothes and put them on again. The normal bribery things like sticker books don´t seem to have much impact.

I´m fed up but have genuinely only been sweetness and light with her. The sofa and armchairs now smell. It is too cold to go out much and potentially try to get her to sit on a potty outside.

Any ideas on a way forward please? Oh, of course I would love to increase her fluid intake to force more output but she has also always refused to drink much - probably not even one full small cup in a day, even her favourite drinks ; (

OOps, sorry

Is this post supposed to make other people feel inferior and that they're children are lagging behind. Not read the other posts but for gods sake?! There is a difference between being potty trained and just coincidentally catching wee and poo.

Why would you want to sit a young baby on a potty?!!!! Personally I'd rather not have my child poo and wee over the house and their clothes for longer than is necessary.

Right, I'm just going off to post a question about whether or not to start training my 2yr 2mth old. I don't think OP need reply!

Coupleofkooks- babies really do NOT HAVE BLADDER CONTROL as it is down to muscle tone, they don't have the tone to sit up! Let alone control bladder movements!!!

To all those who say 'EC isn't harming the child, let them get on with it'

Yes you are, the bladder muscle does not develop well or strengthen unless the bladder is allowed to stretch to capacity, which doesn't happen with EC because inevitably the child is put on the potty and empties before the bladder is full. Therefore, it takes longer to go a decent time between needing to urinate later in childhood.

I waited until they were able to sit on the loo. imho much better than a potty & done in a few days.

Ah ha ha ha Sorry i think this thread is hilarious!

1. why have a baby if you dont like scraping poo off the back, legs, neck...everywhere some days!

My mum has always told me " you were potty trained by the age of 1, Its time DGS is out of nappies" that put me under mega pressure to potty train him at 2, when it proper freaked him out and he got really upset at nursery i put him back in nappies til 2 yrs 7 months. Right as nine pence ever since!

Why why why do people want to hold babies over the potty at 4 months old.... can they even hold their heads up then?!? Why the pressure to get there first... dont you want to just enjoy being a mum and being with your baby rather than making her/him grow up too fast?!

Dear dear dear.....