Episiotomy

[watermelonsugar99]

Hi, just wanting a bit of advice.
I had my baby on Tuesday (6 days ago) after an hour of pushing in labour I was rushed to surgery for forceps and an episiotomy. I was discharged the day after with iron tablets as I lost quite a lot of blood.

I know it's early days but I'm still struggling so much with the pain, I take paracetamol and ibuprofen regularly and try to keep the area as clean as I can. I still can't walk properly without pain nor can I sit down, even if I try sitting on my side. I asked the midwife to check my stitches and she said they seem okay but she can't see them inside so she doesn't know how they're healing there. I'm really struggling as my partner is back at work next week & I don't think I'm going to be able to cope on my own, since getting out of hospital I've been crying constantly and feeling guilty. I can't even get up during the night to get baby as it takes me about 10 minutes to try get out of bed. Did anyone else have a similar experience? How was everyone's recovery with an episiotomy as I've heard so many horror stories which is not helping my anxiety!!

Any tips for a faster recovery? Using a peri bottle every time I go to the toilet and spritz for bits on my pad every time it gets changed

@Ree91 they really are! My HV rang back, said to ring the doctors and demand an appointment. She even thinks it's a cows milk allergy. I've rang them and they said I'll get a phone call before closing time at 6pm so hopefully they actually do ring me and listen xx

@watermelonsugar99 please say they rung you?! Xx

@Ree91 yeah he did, he was such a dick!! Said that usually a paediatrician would need to see him but they're not seeing anyone at the moment and that cows milk allergies take weeks for symptoms to show so he doesn't think it's that. I said so what am I supposed to do then let him cry his eyes out in pain etc 24/7 until someone eventually wants to see him? It could be months from now! He then finally said I'll send some different milk over for him but if it doesn't work within a week then put him on his normal Cow&Gate milk and you'll have to just deal with him, then when he was about to come off the phone he said and next time make sure you ring before 5pm because I'm exhausted after a whole days work, I've spoke to 63 people today and now I can't think straight so don't get me to ring you this late ever again.. could he be anymore of a prick?!!! Xx

@watermelonsugar99 that is absolutely disgusting! You should log a complaint with the way you've been treated, it's awful. On the plus side, at least you've got some more milk! Xx

@watermelonsugar99 my son had colic for the first 6 weeks, he never had a rash. That totally sounds like an allergy to me. I would make a complaint! He’s had a busy day has he, poor thing eh. Never mind the traumatic birth, recovery & poorly child your dealing with on very little sleep. Think I would have slapped him hahaha.

Hi OP, only just caught up on this thread and it's like reading my own experience back three years on! I promise you things will get better - you're not having an easy start but this isn't parenthood forever. It's all a stage and the stages end. Hang in there.

How is your episiotomy healing?

Re: cow's milk protein allergy, don't let them fob you off. My daughter had extreme colic and mild eczema from the off and I was fobbed off. I gave up diary for a while but didn't really stick at it; it's so hard at the beginning anyway and we were having other feeding issues due to tongue tie so I put it to one side. Once we started weaning at six months she very clearly had an immediate allergy. She is also allergic to egg. We went through months of colic/screaming for nothing - but I know how hard it is as a first time mum to understand what's going on.
I would say give up dairy and stick with it for a couple of months. If no improvement after then, then see how things are after that and try other elimination. If things are totally better, challenge it one day - eat a load of diary one day and see what happens within 48 hours. (This is all assuming you're breastfeeding; sorry if I missed a post explaining your not, if not do speak to your HV about an alternative formula but you could also try buying SMA Wysoy (though some babies with CMPA also react to soy).
There are some excellent CMPA support groups on Facebook. I would definitely advise joining one.
Good luck OP. My daughter is now 3 and wonderful. She still has allergies but she's a happy little thing and a joy to be around. I found the first year hard but it does get better.
In fact I'm due to have my second at the beginning of October. Hoping for a slightly easier run this time...

@Ree91 exactly! I'm glad they've gave me some milk for him but I'm definitely putting a complaint in for how he's spoken to me and then I'll put another one in if this is an allergy as I've mentioned a potential allergy about 8 times & constantly been fobbed offXx

@Johnson10 that was what I was trying to explain to him, that surely there's something wrong when there's a rash coming out every time he has a bottle. That's deffo not colic! He was then saying I've told you before even if it's colic nothing will work for him. What so I have to sit up with him all night while he's hysterically crying because doctor dickhead has decided that he doesn't want to do his job?! X

@watermelonsugar99 how is little one coping on his new milk? Are you feeling any better xx

@Ree91 he's not drinking as much and still crying but his rash has basically gone and his vomiting has reduced a lot. The HV came out to weigh him today, he hasn't lost weight which is great! He will need to be weighed weekly though due to him not drinking what he should. Just been told to stick with the new milk as he'll probably be trying to adjust to it but if he's still being funny with the bottles to speak to the GP on Tuesday at our 6-8 week check up as he may need another change of milk.

I'm slowly getting there thank you! not in major pain like I was before. Mainly just cramp& moody off my period😂 and still sore but I'm only taking ibuprofen once or twice a day now if needed so I can deffo see how much I've improved😊 we've gone into pretty much local lockdown, had a lot of restrictions put in place like a curfew, no public transport unless going to work or school and no seeing family so i'm a bit stressed as a few family members were helping out by sitting in the living room with little one while I had a quick nap and it was helping me so much. No idea how I'm going to get through the next few weeks if he carries on😩 how are you doing? Xx

@watermelonsugar99 fingers crossed he's just getting used to it, positive signs that the rash has gone though! I've come off now too, although dear god the first 2 days were so heavy! My postpartum bleeding wasn't this heavy yeah I know the feeling about local lockdown, we've just been put into one practically too which sucks. Don't worry, we will manage we always do! And you'll come out the stronger side xx

I’ve had two. I’d recommend using tea tree oil in your bath to help the healing and keep it clean. X

I had a shallow bath soak every night with bath salts for the first 10 nights. Then drying 'down there' with a hairdryer on cool mode. I also used to keep some wrapped nursing pads in the freezer for a bit and spraying them with a tea tree with witch hazel solution (think it was actually a skin spray from Boots) before use. I also used to sit down on an inflated ring on the sofa to prevent any pressure on the stitches. Try rolling out of bed too to keep the pressure off that area.

Sorry lol just seen the thread had moved on from that question weeks ago .

@Ree91 yeah it definitely is, he's been crying for the past hour but hasn't been too bad all day today, small steps! I spoke to soon mines back again, mine was so heavy for the first 2 days as well, then went and now has came back heavy again! Ah god are you in the North East as well or has somewhere else been put into one now?! I don't think anyone's listening to any of the rules at all from what I've seen online😅 and yes exactly! Just trying to think positive and hopefully it'll all be over soon! Xx

@thefourgp thank you X 🙂

@AfolMummy hahaha no it's fine!! They're still useful tips if anyone ever finds the thread and needs advice! 7 weeks PP on Tuesday and still rolling out of bed, I think it'll be a new thing for me😂

I’m in Newcastle! Nobody is listening to the lockdown rules at all haha. I personally think it’s very tough for new mums.
I mean on a mental health level. My partner is at work all day. Now we aren’t allowed to see anyone outside of our household. Luckily my mum lives alone, she lives down the street so she will still be popping in. Think I’d go insane. They’d usually be encouraging you get out & about.

@watermelonsugar99 most definitely small steps! I'm in the north west so they fall under these new measures too, which are going to be tough on us. As Johnson says, doesn't half take it's toll on your mental health, particularly when we spent the first few weeks unable to go out because we couldn't walk properly! Madness eh xx

@Johnson10 Sunderland for me, it's the exact same here! And I completely get what you mean, my partners at work all day as well but my family live at the opposite end of Sunderland to me and don't live alone so I can't see them😩 it really does play havoc with your mental health, I'm just going to try get out with the buggy even if I have to go for small walks a few times a day to try keep myself sane

@Ree91 ahh really! I'm back to not being able to walk properly again, this period has really took it out of me and is leaving me in so much pain. It's still so heavy too, it's been 8 days now😩 have my check up on Tuesday so going to mention it then.. I've never heard such stupid rules before, you can go to a pub and still go to the shops that are constantly packed but you can't get on public transport unless you're going to work/school and you can't see close family?!! Xx

@watermelonsugar99 ridiculous rules aren't they, I can't see my parents in my house which I know is clean, but I can see them in a pub which probably hasn't been kept clean if it's busy...madness! I really feel bad for you with the period saga now, our bodies never give us a break do they! Is it still as bad today? How's little one doing? Xx

@Ree91 exactly!! Especially when people are going to the pubs when having symptoms/awaiting results when they know they've got it!! No definitely not I feel as though it's one thing after another haha. It hasn't slowed down at all and now on day 8, feeling faint every time I stand up& extremely tired 24/7, I'm hoping I don't need iron tablets again😩 I would have thought that it'd be slowing down by now but doesn't seem to be easing off at all! Little ones doing good thank you apart from the constant vomiting, going to mention that on Tuesday and see what they say about it. Feel so bad for him. How are you and your little one doing? Xx

@watermelonsugar99 how did you get on today? I made my dp look at my wound much to his protesting haha, and I'm pleased to say it's now completely scarred over!! Looks horrific but at least it's closed now to brave the shave! Xx

I was in a wheelchair for 2 days after mine and was in so much pain 6 nurses checked me over during the next 2 weeks. I couldn't walk or sit well for weeks.
I couldn't drive and had to sit on a pillow wherever I went.
5 years on and still painful during sex.
Healed well to look at and Dr has checked more recently and all OK according to them

Mines completely healed now. The granulation tissue lump had disappeared & scarred over.
Certainly doesn’t look as it did before hand. I’m pain free but sometimes when I’m sitting down & move to rest all my weight on that side it can be sore, more like in the inside. I guess that’s normal? Still haven’t attempted the deed yet !!!

@Ree91 aw it was good news thank you for asking!! She said I've healed absolutely fab and that I can now do whatever I want, she said the pain that I'm in is because there's still some scar tissue that she can see but if I massage the area when I feel up to it, it should help ease the tissue 🙂 ahh I'm so happy yours is healed as well, that amazing news!! I bet you're buzzing. I've shaved once but was petrified so only done a bit, God it was so patchy, me and DH had a good giggle when I got out the bath😂😂 haven't done it since then but feel way more comfortable doing it now knowing it's actually healed! The first time was scary but was completely fine. Good luck!! Xx