Episiotomy

[watermelonsugar99]

Hi, just wanting a bit of advice.
I had my baby on Tuesday (6 days ago) after an hour of pushing in labour I was rushed to surgery for forceps and an episiotomy. I was discharged the day after with iron tablets as I lost quite a lot of blood.

I know it's early days but I'm still struggling so much with the pain, I take paracetamol and ibuprofen regularly and try to keep the area as clean as I can. I still can't walk properly without pain nor can I sit down, even if I try sitting on my side. I asked the midwife to check my stitches and she said they seem okay but she can't see them inside so she doesn't know how they're healing there. I'm really struggling as my partner is back at work next week & I don't think I'm going to be able to cope on my own, since getting out of hospital I've been crying constantly and feeling guilty. I can't even get up during the night to get baby as it takes me about 10 minutes to try get out of bed. Did anyone else have a similar experience? How was everyone's recovery with an episiotomy as I've heard so many horror stories which is not helping my anxiety!!

Any tips for a faster recovery? Using a peri bottle every time I go to the toilet and spritz for bits on my pad every time it gets changed

@carleyemma91 I’m in the same boat! I gave birth 30th June. How is yours healing ?

@watermelonsugar99 @Johnson10 you've both mentioned me so i'm just replying to both!

My episiotomy makes for some grim reading so don't be put off, but as my internal stitches were still in and just my external ones that all fell out (I had over 30 stitches in total so it was a pretty decent wound) they decided they were just going to leave me to heal. I've had 3 infections, slough on the outside of the wound which has healed itself and as of today i'm 8 weeks pp and still not fully healed. If you can see redness that is localised to the wound itself that may just be the skin being raw where it's knitting together.

My best advice I can give is for the absolute burning agony that is having a wee, and that is get into position as if you're about to run the 100m sprint. Get your butt has far back on the toilet as you can and lift it up off the seat with your hands on the floor to steady yourself.

Mines a bit of a horror story @watermelonsugar99 so please don't be put off! I was given codeine and naproxen for the pain, as well as being told to take paracetamol 4 times a day and since I was at the hospital just nice warm baths soothe it. The general pain went away after about 5 weeks for me, and its just been when I go for a wee and it stings like a bugger. I hope your health visitor is a bit better than your midwife!

@carleyemma91 oh that sounds absolutely awful! My health visitor got in touch this morning and thankfully she's the nicest person ever, she rang my doctors and demanded that they give me a call back the same day, the doctor I spoke to was finally a nice one and gave me codeine for the pain as well as some antibiotics as I have a small infection internally rather than externally. He thinks this is why I'm in so much pain and feel like I'm not getting any better. Fingers crossed these work and in the next 5 days I can actually walk around!! I still feel like majority of the pain is on my external stitches, they feel so tight but I'm assuming that's probably them trying to heal. How are you feeling? Hopefully you make a full recovery soon!

Glad you've got some good stuff now @watermelonsugar99 once those antibiotics start working you'll feel like a new woman, I'm sure 😊

Congratulations on your baby, I really feel for you as I had forceps delivery, episiotomy, 3rd degree tear and was doubly incontinent for a while. I remember was very difficult to sit and I also ended up with infection which made it more painful. I found if I squirted the spritz for bits directly on my bits as well as the pads helped, and airing like your doing too. I feel for you as I remember the pain and how uncomfortable I was. Make sure you see a woman's health physio (can be referred through your GP) if experiencing any incontinence as I was doubly incontinent which was very difficult initially but woman's health physio really helped and I have no issues now with it so you don't have to live with it. It's early days and your doing well it's a big trauma to deal with for your body as well as the shock of having a new baby and all the hormones etc. But promise it does get better!

@Pinkychilla thank you! I haven't experienced any incontinent yet but have been struggling with Pelvic floor exercises so I was thinking about ringing in the next week or so if I'm still struggling. I'm so glad you're doing okay now though! Makes me feel so much better hearing about people who've recovered well after having one, especially since it's so hard to look at the bigger picture when you're in so much pain x

@watermelonsugar99 How you doing ? I’m now 7w pp. It’s not the gaping hole or a car crash that it was but it’s not healed completely yet.
I’ve now ended up with thrush. I so feel your pain. Feels like it’s never going to end. X

@Johnson10 oh God I feel for you with the thrush! Seems like one thing after another doesn't it?! I'm 2w pp tomorrow, antibiotics run out on Wednesday which I'm glad about because they're making me so nauseous every day I'm starting to be able to move around a tiny bit more but still in pain. I managed to get stronger pain relief off the doctor, he gave me codeine but I'm trying not to take them as they constipate you soo badly and that's the last thing I need at the moment😂 X

"No one ever warned me about the recovery from episiotomy and forceps, not even a leaflet, and I feel quite angry that women are routinely given this procedure without after care"
^ this.
And with covid on top, it's like a big guessing game working out what's common and when to reach out for help, and when.

*And who to ask - like which professional.

I agree. It’s horrendous. I’m 7w pp. still not completely healed. My actual labour & birth, although looks like a horror show on paper was still positive for me. But this is horrific. I just can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel & feel the after care has been poor.

@Johnson10 completely agree about the after care being poor, I've tried and tried to be seen by a GP/Midwife or health visitor for someone to check to see if everything is healing okay and if they can do a swab to see if I have an infection or not but instead they're just giving me antibiotics left right and centre and saying "hopefully these work"!! I still can't even walk properly and I'm 3w PP on Tuesday.. I feel as though I'm never going to heal properly!

For the first few weeks all that helped me was having a long warm bath to soak in every evening and some paramol over the counter at boots.

I had an episiotomy with DS1 and I remember the pain well. IIRC it was worst about 5-6 days after birth. It then did most definitely get better but I remember well the non-fussed attitudes of the midwife. Easy to say I know but I think the best thing as long as it's your first is to lie on the sofa with your baby and watch netflix as much as possible.
I had a bath every day with tee tree oil in every day while DH held the screaming baby. Not sure it helped as such but it was soothing at the time.

@Frazzled2207 yeah they're definitely none-fussed. I've had to beg and beg the GP to see me in person to check me out because I was sick of telling the midwife something wasn't right and being ignored, turns out at the top of the cut the stitches came away (I told her I thought this had happened and she said no they haven't you'll be fine) and I've got a big infection in there because it's been left for so long I've started using tea tree oil in the bath now as I've heard it has natural healing properties in it and can help prevent infections so I'm hoping that and the very strong painkillers I'm on will help take the infection away so I can feel somewhat better!! DP is back at work on Monday and I'm so scared about being alone, but I'm definitely just going to lie on the sofa with baby watching Netflix, not really anything else I can do when I can't sit or walk haha

@Johnson10 how are you feeling now? Hopefully you're recovering nicely.. turns out my stitches burst too and there's a big infection behind there because of being dismissed and left for so long.. the absolute joys how long did it take for you to be able to walk a bit better and be in less pain? Just I know you mentioned yours burst after 4 days and you've had a pretty long recovery bless you!

@watermelonsugar99
I’m not bad, thanks for asking! I’m 8w pp now. I’ve just done a 5 mile walk today. I’m feeling much better. Only this week I haven’t been sore or felt pain. I was being treated for thrush but a swab tested me positive for BV. Got some antibiotics & it’s really helped me. Feeling human again. The most painful time was the beginning, it did ease after about 3/4 weeks. Think I’m almost healed now, although it doesn’t look good! I have some over granulation which will need looking at / taken off. Little flap of skin there, it’s not painful though. I’m pretty shocked at how different the lady bits look now compared to before, kinda feel butchered. And I haven’t heard a positive episiotomy story yet !!!
Hope your managing. X

@Johnson10 oh that's amazing I'm so glad to hear you're feeling a lot better.. That's made me feel a lot more positive! I'm so excited for when I can go for walks lol. I'm 3 weeks now and I feel horrendous but hoping after these antibiotics I feel a lot better! I keep looking as well and I know I shouldn't haha, it makes me feel awful about myself. I wouldn't exactly say it looks horrendous it just looks extremely different, I've got something growing as well (can't remember the actual name for it) but mines also not painful, they said they'd only remove it if it was causing pain! The absolute joys of childbirth. I was saying to my DP the other day I don't even remember giving consent for the episiotomy because I was that drugged up! Wish I wasn't so I could have opted for a cs instead X

Hi OP, congratulations on baby and sorry you are going through this. I had an epesiotomy and 3rd degree tear and was in agony for weeks. It was 5 weeks before I could wipe myself normally after having a wee. I'd advise to just keep on top of pain relief, wash with just water down there a couple of times a day and air dry completly before putting on underwear. I used to hold the hairdryer at a distance! Honestly it was the worst pain of my life, I couldn't even lie in bed for 3 days after getting home, but it won't last forever. Hope things improve soon

@watermelonsugar99 Totally feel your pain, i gave birth nearly 3 weeks ago and had a 3rd degree tear. It has put me off another pregnancy 😩 i've got a uti, i've had ridiculous diarrhoea, then constipation, my back side absolutely kills too! It never ends!! I'm now worried about a possible prolapse 😭 i'm only 28! Is there a light at the end of the tunnel??!

@MaryBoBary hi! Thank you very much. I thought the pregnancy and childbirth was painful, people fail to mention that it's definitely the postpartum period that's the most painful part of having a child! Thank you for reassuring me it won't last forever, I think when you're in so much pain and so sleep deprived you feel like there's no end to it!

@Oldestchild90s the top of my cut has popped open, the pain I felt when the doctor was inspecting it was absolutely horrific. She told me it looks like it could be at least 12 weeks for me to make a decent enough recovery and I just completely burst into tears to her. Then burst into tears in the car park too. I'm the same as you with diarrhoea then constipation. I was prescribed codeine but if I take them daily I get severely constipated and have to take laxatives which then upsets my stomach for days due to having IBS! I really feel your pain, I'm only 20 and have had such a bad day today of hysterically crying thinking that I've ruined my life and my vagina lmao, I'm also worried about a prolapse too but the GP never mentioned it so I'm hoping I'm just scaring myself and she hasn't just missed it as she couldn't look inside because I was in so much pain. I really hope you recover:( there's nothing worse, the amount of times I've cried thinking I've ruined everything and then cried because I feel guilty thinking that when I have such a perfect little boy! Every story I've read even the most horrific birthing stories, they've always recovered in the end! We both will recover, it just may take some time.

How are you OP?

How are you OP?

@MaryBoBary I'm slowly getting there! I'm still in a lot of pain and still a long way from recovery but I can see myself doing more and more each week:) I have my 6 week check in a week and a half so I'm hoping by then I'm feeling even better. Thank you for asking!