May 2010: All the babies have arrived, welcome to the other side!

[rachelfruitloop]

Here we are ladies, a new Postnatal thread! I wonder if we'll fill this one up as fast with one-handed typing?!

Pamelat - I know exactly how you feel. DD1 needed entertaining all the time. I couldn't put her down for a minute, to put the kettle on or do dinner, without her crying. She slept in short bursts and didn't sleep through until she was 3.5years! Even now, she wants me to watch everything she does - on the trampoline, etc.

This LO is sooo different. Slept 10 hours last night! I HATED mummies who told me this with DD1! She's happy to go in her bouncy chair, or swing, or play on the mat, and will be passed for cuddles to other people without screaming. Such a different baby! It's sooooo enjoyable!

Rachel/TT - I've been thinking of wills too. So complicated with two kids from two dads. I still have a life assurance policy wth XP, I think, vbut haven't set one up with DP!

hobnob it sounds like things just keep getting worse and worse re sorting out my cousin's estate - there's no way this isn't going to end up in court - so I can only repeat what I said before : please sort a will asap!! It's his funeral tomorrow and given the way things are going, I'm almost expecting a bad tempered affair. I just hope that all concerned can put their animosity to one side for one day and focus on something other than money

i really ought to get round to making a will now too.dh changed his 3 years ago, cost £170. now we both need to do one i guess. carikube, try not to fret about tomorrow, just try to remember the good times.i will be thinking of you.

i remember a cousin a few years ago died, no will, separated from dh many years, new dp, the ex ended up with everything [hmmm]

Quick post. Will fully reply to all once inlaws go.

sk Totally know where u're coming from with awake baby. Sam has done days awake from 6am - 11pm with a few 5 or 10 min cat naps. Exhausting!!! Always sleeps till 3am ish then down again till 6 and quite happy with that. Been perfect baby while inlaws here. Lots of naps and done 3 nights 9 - 4!

Hit the wall yest with inlaws. She is getting worse. Keeping up with the feeding comments "stll" "again" but at bbq with my folks last night in front of everyone was saying (no joke), when sam wanted feed wee while after a 30 min feed "is that mum not feeding u well enough" "look she's eating her dessert b 4 giving u yours" "I'm taking note of all this to tell u when u're older"!!!!

She had conversation with my mum and basically said she didn't think I was doing a good job, we were really messy, that they were doing all this gardening (also had c section 7 weeks ago and not yet properly healed) and I wasn't helpinhg, that I wasn't rushing after them making cups of tea, that she didn't she why i was tired as he was sleeping well and she didn't remember it being hard work.

My mum didn't know what to say. She said, I don't think he always is so good and its been 7 weeks of it. Her answer, "well they're young". 31 is hardly ancient but not the 18yrs old she was. She did not breast feed so knows nothing about it but continually jibes.

Yesterday, she made tea for everyone but not for me glued to sofa feeding in next room. Today I walked through as she was doing it again and she said, "oh I'm not making u one as my hands are dirty".

She has also rearranged the cutlery drawer. I moved it back. There is more but i'll stop before i damage the laptop!

homebirth that sounds familiar - before DH became my H I was on at him to make a will as his father would have been his next of kin along with his DM and so would have had the right to claim half of everything he's worked for all his life, even though he has had no involvement in his life and they haven't even spoken in nearly 30 years...

Sorry, I posted and ran earlier so didn't reply to anyone else. alle DD2's poos are light brown and runny (nice!) and she is 100% bf. I'm trying to remember what DD1's nappies were like as we were transitioning from bf to ff as they definitely got firmer (TMI!). Actually that reminds me - for those that have bf longterm, does bf poo ever improve or is it like this now until weaning? As we'll be doing BLW the chances of her 'eating' anything substantial before 8-9 months is quite small and I can't face another 7 months of such runny nappies [eww emoticon]

Big excitement round here as DD1 has taken her first steps. She's still very unsteady when on her own but it was nice being able to bring both girls in from the car together rather than having to go in relay this evening as DD1 could walk from the car to the front door just holding on to one hand [proud mummy emoticon]

Sorry read post back Did not mean to imply that new baby was an easy life if you are 18!

Ooh Sassles x-post. Smack her! That's about all that I can say - very for you. Can your DH not say anything to her to get her to tone it down?

sassles I really think thats out of order and that you or your DH or your mum should have a word with her. The feeding comments especially are cruel and unnecessary. Are they still around?

Why dont you ask for a word with her and say that you find her comments hurtful and that you are doing what you consider best for your baby/her grandchild and that she is not helping matters.

I would expect my DH to stand up for me in that scenario. I get lots of "not still", "not again" comments which I let wash over me (with gritted teeth) but the "Mummy not feeding you well enough" type comments are frankly nasty.

oh sassles, how infuriating for you! is your DH telling her to stop it? how long now till they go home? and as for your comment about 18yr old mums i dont think it was at all offensive and i doubt anyone took it that way. i had dd1 at 21 and now dd4 at 37, very different, i had so much more energy at 21 that in that sense it was easier (didnt feel so tired all the time) but in the same way i am a lot more laid back and relaxed now so although tired, am a lot less likely to stress over the small things.

carikube, re the walking. how exciting! now you are for it lol. oh i am delighted for you, it is so much fun watching them toddle, i remember dd1's first time walking off in a strop, have loads of photos. her first walk in the woods, ha ha she got tired so we used her new wellies that we had just bought her to collect chestnuts to roast. have fun, it is such a special time.

Poo - well I have the original poo monster, he must poo at least 8-10 times a day, he is on about 2 outfits a day at least and today he even leaked over me. Poo is bright yellow and very runny, sometimes a green one thrown in for good luck. Yes poo stays like it until they are weaned, at least it doesn't smell.

Sassles - poor you, ignore her or tell her to butt out. I got it all first time around about the BFing and it not being good enough. Now I am on no4 noone says anything.

Carikube - yey well done DD1, love it when they take their first steps.

pamelat - no don't feel about talking about Alex, I wish Jacob was more like him, I cannot wait until he will lie for 15 mins under his play gym.

Am away to wrap some birthday presents now

PS sassles my MIL told me a few months ago that DD1 was 'doing so much better, absolutely thriving, since she'd been on formula' which killed me - she just had no idea how much it had devastated me giving up bf. I decided it wasn't worth getting in to a fight over (having already advised you to give your MIL a slap!) and that I'd overlook it (though not forget it). I think what I'm trying to say is that your MIL won't have a clue that what she's said has hurt you and that you can let it eat away at you, or mentally stick two fingers up and get on with how you're doing things...

Thanks homebirth for those happy memories, I'll be aware of what to look out for! We've already tried to film some of it but of course she's not very cooperative

Hi everyone,

first1 not seen you post for a few days, really hope you're home and feeling much better.

mollycuddles / sweetkitty sorry things are a bit rough for you guys. I'm thinking of you and anyone else who's feeling the strain. These early months really aren't easy. I'd love to have had my babies at 3 months, certainly with DD1 things started to click at that stage.

sassles I don't know how you're coping. I would have snapped a long time ago!

alle I never miss an opportunity to discuss poo, surely every new mummy's favourite subject Harry's ff and poops once a day, it's a kind of pastey texture, first half a greyish and then yellow.

Harry's had a bit of a grumpy day today but on the whole is doing well. Really starting to feel tired from 9 weeks of interupted sleep. He is however only waking once for a feed usually 3 something.

For those of you reporting fabulous sleep (congrats!!) what do your babies weigh? Wondering if there's a connection.

Happy to report that my draft will has just been stuffed into an envelope to be returned to the solicitors tomorrow. It's been something DH & I have been meaning to sort out for years and happy to report that we've almost completed the task!

morning all
good nights starting to be the norm here, i was so knocked yesterday that dh had to take over and let me lay in bed in agony, but feel better now...
sassles, don't tell me, you got the stepmother of snow white, right?, mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the best mil of all? who? nooooooooooo
i got anemia and everyone is carrying me in pillows, a c-sec, you're not helping, not making you a tea when you are bfeeding, bad enough, but insinuating that you are not the best of mothers, tell your mum to stop being polite and tell her what she really thinks, sure will be pretty, nobody has the right to insult you in your own home, tell her she has a choice, either she helps or she goes, this ain't a vacation...
poo: i was just curious, oscar used to have 3 or 4 runny poos a day, the last two days only one and firmer, he is ff with a bottle of ebm a day, i just wonder if i should be worried... milli just read your post sounds similar to mine, could have changed because i hadn't put him to the breast for 2 weeks?, by the way as hurtful comments, my fil, who by the way loves as if i was his, started to say, while i was talking about this with my mil, that surely is just easier to put him to the breast than to express all day just to give him a bottle, my mil put him in place!
oscar weights nearly 5 kg which is 10lb 9 at last weight, good old red book...

sassles, sorry post again, i was still ranting about your mil and i had a thought, you can always let her read this last bit of the thread, she might see she's wrong.

Hello everyone,

Sorry for being late in replying. Got discharged from hospital on Thursday, and have a follow up appt with gynae consultant in about 5 weeks. Bleeding has subsided now touches wood! but just waiting for next period to start to see what that'll be like, scared of it to be honest which sounds ridiculous. Why can't men have periods

Re birth weight: Chloe was weighed at 10lb 3oz a week ago which according to magic red book puts her on 50th centile for weight. She'll be 7 weeks on Thursday.

Re 6-8 week check: Hmm quite pissed off with this one, mine is tomorrow (though unofficial really as going to consultant next month), Chloe's I can't get her an appointment until she's 9 weeks. Nor her jabs. Stupid GP surgery apparently only uses 2 of their 5 doctors for baby checks, and they're both on holiday at the same time. Think the Practice Manager needs to "practice managing" her staff rotas to be honest. But anyway, does that mean all her jabs will be a week out or do you think we'll be able to get back on track?

Re poos: Chloe tends to do one spectacular poo a day. She is ff and it's usually squishy mustard or greeny sometimes for good measure (tmi).

Re sleep: She went 9-5 last night!

sassles Really feel for you with the inlaws. Can you have a word with them? Or better still, get your DH to do it? Kinda think it's his duty to stick up for you!

carikube Aww how lovely about her walking! Watch out, you'll be kept very busy from now on!

first1 so happy to hear you are home
i am confused, virginia is 5 weeks now and i know i need to make appt for my 6 week check, do i need separate one for virginia with gp or with hv????

just expressed for milk bank again, got 80mls in 5 mins from one boob! does this mean when virginia is having what i consider a quick snack, she is actually getting 80+ mls???? anyone know how this works?

she has not been herself last 24hrs, grumpy, sleepy, not feeding as she usually does, just little tired nibbles and when she cries its almost pained, do you think she needs gp? she does not have a temp (bought the calpol forehead thermometer to check, its brilliant)dont know if its real or i am just paranoid and imagining things.

off to baby sensory now, see if she perks up a bit

brilliant to hear from you first, sorry about your surgery, are you sure they have a manager?
homebirth at your supply, i only occasionally get 70ml from both boobs, normally is sort of 30ml, again from both boobs. checks: you need to book with the gp one app for you and one for lo, but they do them together.
re: your worry, is she feeding and wetting/dirtying nappies?, monitor her for a few hours and if you are still worried call the surgery, i normally get a telephone app with the nurse (we are becoming friends by now) and i take him to the surgery if she thinks better to have a look, once there we decide if he needs to see the gp, altough sometimes is the gp who wants to see him, nothing medically related, he just likes babies, and i go a lot to the gp, so kind of friendly guy.

bit of an education for me, can someone explain what the centiles mean? oscar is in the 9th centile for weight. thanks

Question about eye colour...When do they change? Obviously not all baby's do change, but Chloe is 7 weeks almost and still very blue. Her dad's are blue/green and mine brown.

Thanks

eye color: mine are brown, dh green, oscar blue like the sea still, 10 weeks thursday.
apparently, you need two genes to get blue eyes, so if i have one blue gene and one brown gene( gets me brown) and dh has one blue gene and one green gene (gets him green), if oscar gets one blue gene from each of us, makes him blue. i did a calculator that takes into consideration our parents and siblings eye colour, we have a 6 % chance of having a blue eyed child, 30 % green eyed and 64% brown eyed, that was research by massachusset university.

nephews were born with light eyes, change to brown in a few days, niece was born with brown eyes, so stay that way, and cousin was born with blue eyes, changing to green now, she is 2 yo.
i asked the same question to my mil, as lots of kids that side of the family, her answer: who knows!

Centiles - it relates to the weights of 100 imaginary babies from previous studies in UK. Different cultures will have different charts. Ff babies and bf differ too but not much until after 3 months. 9th centile means 9 of the hundred babies will weight less (or 9%) or 91 will weigh more. 50th centile means half of babies weigh more and half less. A baby born on 9th centile is expected to grow along the typical growth line for other 9th centile babes but dropping 1 or 2 centile lines or going up to 1 or 2 centiles higher is normal unless other signs of problems eg not pooing/weeing enough, unsettled etc. Dropping more than 2 can be a concern but usually isn't. Molly was 75th born and is now approaching 91st - ds and dd1 did similar. The likely centile for your baby is effected by your own size and their dad - obviously. Hope that's clear.

Re pooing - Molly poos about every 36 hours and it's pretty scary when she does. Today she had to be bathed as it was everywhere front and back. More frequent offerings might be better. She's exclusively bf. She weighs about 12lb - was 11lb 11oz last Tuesday and is now 7 wks.

Re a practice not doing vaccs because the 2 docs are away. Bit crap really - I agree. We have 2 docs who do the vaccine clinic and the only week we don't do is between Xmas and ny as no one wants to come then. If both were away - they never have been in the nearly 4 yrs I've been there we'd book a locum or one of the rest of us would do it.

More personals later - I have to go and play pictionary with kids. Promised yesterday. Will put Molls in my new sling so she'll hopefully sleep or I can feed her as needed. She's getting too heavy to hold for a long feed if the chair is not ideal. Thanks all for your support re dh. The addition of white noise at bedtime means we're getting better sleep which really helps.

thanks for the explanation molls, really clear

thanks for advice alle, will keep an eye on her.

molly, wow, that much poo! in 5 weeks we have not a single 'explosion' although it certainly sounds like it at times.

we have up to 3 free range organic egg yolk (we keep chickens lol) poos a day, occasionally one can be green but have been told by neonatal nurse that this can be because of wind.

pictionary is a great game, my older girls and i have always enjoyed playing games together, now they are older it is risk, the great game of britain, scrabble, battleships that type of stuff. we have a beautiful chess set i bought for DH for 1st wedding anniversary but i am no good at chess really so need to learn.

is the bedtime white noise on cd? virginia currently sleeps best with the sound of the fan in the background but im not doing that in winter, we live in a big old draughty house.

sassles how many hours to go now before your house is your own again?

lol at sleeping with the fan on in winter brilliant!

Interesting about eye colour, no idea when they change, it seems to differ a lot. Both of mine are blue-eyed because DH and I are both blue-eyed. DD's have changed shade though.

Sassles - at your MIL! I hope your DH has a word with her, I know it's hard though.

Carikube - congratulations to your DD, it's lovely when they start walking.

First1 - that's annoying about the jabs and 6-8 week check. I think they can't do the jabs any less than 4 weeks apart so all the jabs may be a week out (that's what the nurse who did Corin's told me last week). DD's jabs were always a week out though and it hasn't been a problem. Nurse might have been wrong though or just making sure I didn't try to book him in too early (not that I would)

Best go now, time to play dollhouses with DD (she's just found my old one and dug it out).