November 09 - solids and crawling underway but sleepless nights still here to stay!!

[scarlotti]

New and shiny thread

Oh helips you poor thing. Everything is so hard when you're tired, not least feeding in the night.

The only thing I can say I've noticed with Rosa is that if I'm tired in the night I don't feed her properly and she nods off with half a full tummy so she inevitably wakes again in an hour or so if she stays in bed with us (like hobnob am guilty of this, especially when tired) or wakes immediately when I put her in her cot as she's not properly satisfied. Cue grumpy tired mummy who repeats the same cycle again. I also try to feed her as much as possible during the day so she is set for a long sleep, which now includes a solid feed sometimes mixed with formula at tea time. Also seems to be that when some kind of development's going on she sleeps badly, e.g. when she learnt to sit up we had a lot of waking for a few nights then after that some really good sleeps til the wee small hours.

Swimming was good today, no tears after being underwater and even some giggles! And after me saying she wouldn't take a bottle anymore, she took one at the pool afterwards (had packed one just in case esp as HATE BFing at the pool as only horrible uncomfortable plastic seats with leery lifeguards and high school children everywhere). Weird.

Hmm... James (and I) do the same thing Helips. I bring him into bed with us for the first night feed, so I can mostly sleep through the next two. I suppose it's quite likely he's feeding just because my boob is right there next to him, but if I do put him back in bed, he wakes really soon afterwards. We seem to have created a habit. I don't mind too much, as it's far nicer feeding and sleeping and waking up to a content baby than getting up in the night, except DH has sort of lost his bed and I am missing drinking wine very much!

Fruit I got the highchair. I tried James out in the one in the Ikea cafe first and he seemed very happy. It's also really light and easy to transport if you're travelling by bus/ pushchair like we were

BBL I was in Asda today and thought Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Evening ladies

Sorry to hear of so many sleepless nights again and feeding frenzies - I have to remember though that some of the babies here are almost a month younger than Ioan, let alone the fact that the boy seemed to get a sniff of food and decide that milk was for wimps! Last night he decided he'd drink the whole dream feed, then have another at 1:30. Managed to get him to take a morning feed which was nice, then this evening we had one after work and another at bedtime!!
He did drop the feeds himself, although I think in part it was at the time he went to the CM as he decided then he'd only take milk from me. The daytime feeds dropped significantly here once solids were well established and it was all on his say so.

He was a bit constipated today - not pellets but struggling to get it out I read that bf babies can struggle more when starting solids as their tummies aren't used to processing stuff. Going to give a little apple juice diluted in the morning and hope that helps him along.

DH and I have had a day and a half today. He sent an email asking if I was happy earlier and then we proceeded to talk about things via email during the afternoon to the point of separation talks (against my suggestion as things can get misconstrued) Ended up with him coming home and being in tears playing with the DS'. We've had a long talk this evening and both been very honest about everything. Am not sure whether all the promises that have been made will be followed through, but things are in reprieve status for now. I've been as open and honest as I can so will just wait and see what happens.

Sorry, bit of a me post..

It sounds like it might have been a productive talk Scarlotti. I hope things improve (if that's what you want). xx

I agree, I often have to remind myself James is a month younger than some others (I think he's exactly a month younger than Ioan), which helps me stop feeling sick with envy! He has JUST gone to bed...

Thanks Laugs, the proof will be in the pudding as they say, but I'm happy to wait a while longer and see. It's too big a thing to do lightly.

It was the same for me with DS1. We were in the month earlier's NCT class as DD was 3.5 weeks early. DS1 then came 5 days late so was 6 weeks behind the 1st NCT baby. 6 weeks is a very long time in development stages!
The only thing he did first was get his teeth as he was a freak child and cut his first one at 4 months

An ok night here, but he was obviolusly listening to my worry about bf - and so fed at 2, 4 and 5:30. Let's hope there's some developmental reason behind it!

scarlotti glad you and dh managed to have a good talk, fingers crossed he bucks his ideas up so that you can give things a proper go.

Another sleepless night here. Put Millie to bed at 8pm and she slept through to 11.15pm so not a bad start. But like missinterpret I only gave half a feed before putting her back in her cot so she woke an hour later. This time I fed her in bed and fell back to sleep, only for ds to wake me up twice, then I put Millie back in her cot as she seemed to be in a deep sleep but then she woke up. I brought her back to bed to feed which she did but then decided she was going to be awake. By now it was 4.15am so I got dh to take her in another room so I could get some sleep! Poor dh has to get up at 5am so I feel a bit bad about that! Anyway, ds woke at 5.15am and I could hear him until dh gave him his new ipad to play with! Then dh left at 6.15am to go to work so I had to get up.

I've had a crap morning too, Millie has been crying a lot because she's tired and ds has been playing up, I ended up really shouting at him and he blew a raspberry at me and smirked. This made me very angry so I picked him up and put him in the porch and shut the frount door for about 30 seconds then felt terrible and brought him back in (btw you can't get out of the frount garden as there is a big wall and gate so I knew he'd be safe) Ds is now at nursery thank god and Millie is napping so I am having a cuppa and trying to relax! I hate shouting at ds but he really does drive me up the wall sometimes, and with Millie crying at the same time and being so tired I just can't help myself

bbl hope your half term is going ok and the boys have stopped fighting!

helips What a night/ morning! You must be shattered. Get to bed when Millie naps?

I need your help ladies. My SIL is now overdue and having a sweep today (I am ridiculously excited as this is my first niece/ nephew ). I have been getting all nostalgic looking at our antenatal thread as we all began to pop! (I also watched the last episode of One Born a Minute again last night, and cried again!). I just wondered if anyone thought any of the 'bringing on labour' tricks worked for them? She really wants a home birth, so wants to avoid induction if possible (well, didn't we all ).

Poor helips, I've been there. I swear that the more tired and snappy I am, the more cheeky and defiant dd1 is. Things have improved immeasurably this past week since dd2 has been more settled and I can deal with dd1 (and dh) more rationally. I think my saving grace is that dh works flexi so can leave at 9 and deal with dd1 in the morning for me.

laugs I tried everything with dd1 to bring on labour without success. With dd2 it took 3 sweeps. A bit of nookie after the 2nd night of contractions intensified things considerably . Oh, and being prepared to refuse induction and wait 16 days....

My grandma died yesterday. I saw her the day before but went home in the evening thinking she'd be OK. DH drove us all there and back in a day. Got call that she wasn't yesterday morning and got on train with both kids down to Worthing- crossing London was OK as we got a taxi but getting on and off the trains was a bit scary, with not enough hands for both of them! But I was too late to say (another goodbye. Probably best to have seen her while she still knew I was there though.
She was wonderful, such a huge part of my childhood. I thought she'd live forever!

Oh dear poppers, I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. It's good that you and the DCs saw your grandma so recently though. I think of my grandmother all the time with Rosa around now. Make sure you talk of her lots so your DS's memories of her are strong.

aww whoppers thats so sad. sorry to hear that. also sending a hug.

So sorry, whoppers x

whoppers oh i am so sorry to hear that . We are hear if you want to talk.

What sad news whoppers, I'm so sorry. xxx

Whoppers so sorry to hear your sad news xxx

I miss the thread more than you think.. I just can't manage to keep up and toddler and reflux baby with no family around is rather busy ...I do read the thread tho to keep and eye and see what life is throwing at us all..
Sleepless by name and sleepless by nature!!! will really try and stick a few comments in when I can..but this baby lark is pretty tiring..love to you all

sleepless! good to hear from you! Still suffering from reflux? you poor things both of you. Glad you lurk. I hope the others do too, look forward to hearing more from you soon x

hey sleepless! I know what you mean about keeping up with a toddler and baby, tho technically my other one is four but tantrums more now than he did as a toddler!

Seems like dh gets home, we have tea put kids to bed then we go to bed. then get up and start the whole thing over. am off to start the cycle again right about now too! hope everyone sleeps well. good night mummies! x

whoppers so sorry to hear your sad news xx

Whoppers So sorry about your grandma xx

Scarlotti Thinking of you, glad you are both communicating a bit more now as I'd imagine the limbo must have been torture.

Laugs Any news from your DSIL? I think walking helped me but I don't know how much these tips to bring on labour actually work.

I don't know how you mums-of-two (or more) do it! Must be seriously hard work. Hope you are all having some "me" time and looking after yourselves.

DP has a job interview on Friday for the only Secondary Maths position in the 7 councils he would consider commuting to. I've also been to a couple of interviews, one of which I was second choice for and another might go to second interviews in a day or two, but we feel that his job needs to come first so if he gets this role it's probably impossible for me to take on another role as it would mean commuting again, whereas my current role is 3 miles away. Feels a bit odd to be in the position where I could earn more and take on a more challenging role but I'm turning down the opportunity to work closer to home, with no prospects and less pay. Hopefully DP will hear if he has been successful or not on Friday and that will make my options a bit clearer. Or not. Hmmm...

My twin brother is also having his second total hip replacement on Friday. Big day for our family!

Ethan's doing ok with formula now. Still sick after a bottle but no more than after a breastfeed. We're doing a spoon fed meal and a finger fed meal at the moment. DMIL has been asking about buying jars so he can get protein in his diet but he is only just 6 months... I think I can afford a bit of time for him to get more used to finger foods before worrying about protein. Am I right? How is everyone else getting on? Thanks to whoever mentioned ready brek!

whoppers what sad news. It's so difficult to mourn the passing of a generation.

scarlotti I'm so glad to hear that proper communication has started. I hope that you can work things out to the point that you are happy with the outcome.

sleepless so good to hear from you! I think of you and your wee refluxer often. What medication is she on? It is 'she' isn't it? We are on omeprazole which definitely seems to keep things under control and helps the sleep situation. If you haven't got it, ask for it. Also, have to experimented with excluding foods?

DWB I was wondering about you too. Glad to hear that the dairy-based formula isn't causing problems. Such a relief. Good luck to DH and DTB for Friday.

We've assembled a gas barbecue today, hoping to use it tomorrow . It's been 6 years in coming...

And, the highlight of this week has to be finally getting childminders sorted for when I go back to work. Shame it's not just one childminder, but beggars can't be choosers round here.

SB meant to ask you if Bryn is ok with all this poor sleeping? Is he teething or gore with wind or just a night owl?

Thanks so much all, and for heavens sake go and see your grandparents while you can!!!!!! Spent the afternoon looking at brilliant photos of grandma for a slideshow- thirty years of pictures of her holding babies, lighting candles on cakes, smiling with children at Christmas etc. (Thity years of shocking hair too in my case!) Family was her life and she was brilliant with children- always let us be children, she was very tolerant and good humoured. Hobnob you are right, this is the second of my grandparenst to die and it's the beginning of them all going, which is very hard to contemplate.

DWB the job searching situation is so difficult, good luck to you and your dp

Scarlotti sounds like a bit of a watershed for you and dh, good luck.

Whoppers its lovely looking over the photos afterwards, isn't it? In a kind of bitter way. A friend died on Friday - his wife, who died a year and a half ago, was one of my dearest friends. Today I was looking through the old photos I have of the two of them in happier times, and it brought a smile to my face. I hope you're okay. x

Hobnob I have no idea I thought we were past this, but the past few weeks, but especially the past few days, he has been thrashing around no end, arching after a feed, fighting about latching on, but is obviously hungry, not settling... He is very windy again, too. Though, again, I'm not sure why; I haven't introduced anything new to his diet, and I haven't been eating any differently (although maybe a bit less since Friday, but that shouldn't affect it, should it? ). Today for about an hour I was so stressed I couldn't actually look at him without feeling annoyed It was horrible. But then he has just given me the most beautiful, looking right into my eyes, almost "Thank you, Mum" smile between his feed and the falling asleep, it is totally forgiven. For now

Scarlotti that sounds like a breakthrough. I really hope it helps.

Just wondering - could we share menus? Firstly, as I am nosey. And secondly as I am running out of ideas

I have decided to start a book about M.E. and pregnancy, childbirth and postnatal. There was nothing when I was looking, and know other people have said so too. So if no one else is gonna do it... Will see how it goes.

Had a lovely lady come up to me today - Bryn was being very grumpy as I was having coffee with some friends, and I don't know whether she over heard me say "I am really loosing the will with the breastfeeding..." or not. But she came up to me whilst I was feeding, squeezed my shoulder and said, "Its so lovely to see that. Its a pain in the arse at times, isn't it? But you're doing a great job - look at what a handsome happy baby you have! (Bryn of course, being the flirt he is, had snapped out of the grump and was giving her his biggest unashamed grin by this point!) They don't tell you how much hard work its going to be, do they? Keep going love." It really made me smile. I needed to hear that today.

Sorry, a very ramble-type post. Hope you're all well, and getting some well deserved sleep.

SOrry if I keep harping on about reflux, but have you considered it with Bryn? Arching and fussing are classic symptoms, and absolutely exasperating for you. I remember dreading feeding dd1, between her bouncing on and off the boob, arching, falling asleep mid-feed and refusing to wake up, then waking up 500% when I put her down.... it was misery. Ask your HV or GP about it - his waking sounds excessive to me (but then I am blessed with a more settled dd2 this time).

Speaking of whom, my pet hate at the moment is her grabbing folds of flesh with her vice-like grip and razor sharp fingernails (no matter how short I cut them). Her favourite places are my neck/jowls, boob and cheek. Ouch. DD1 was a bit of a scratcher, but when feeding massaged the boobs nicely with flat hands. None of this wince-inducing pinching. Along with the biting when she is bothered with something...

We love her really.