Dec 09 - We've found our fingers, we've found our toes, what happens next nobody knows

[Claire236]

Starting new thread before we run out of room. Now to link from the old one. Could be interesting

i only bf ds once today..... whilst its he right thing for ds and for me i am in bits and cant stop crying..... want to wake him and bf him. x

Sparkly what's happened? Chin up sweetheart x

he has just gone off me..... i would feed him till i was sore and express to keep my supply up but all more and more milk did was make him more sick cos he cant keep it all down. he stopped sleeping too. i am also really overweight and my back is very bad but before doc can do anything i need to get my weight down..... ds is 17 weeks and 21lb 1oz so my milk has done well to satisfy him and get him to where he is now!!! doc gave me permission to start solids a week or so ago too. i am getting very down about my appearance and weight so i need ot diet but i cant satisfy ds unless i stuff myself. i am so so so sad and i never thought i would bf at all as i didnt with dd. am proud to have got here but feel so very emotional. i need to stop now and give myself a pat on the ba ck as i have done well and ds is happier now with ff but it hurts like hell and i feel i am letting him down or being selfish. i love my baby so much but feel my body has stopped being useful to him .... i was pregnant then breastfeeding then nothing!!!

Oh sparkly sorry you feel blue , it is normal to feel emotional if you rapidly cut down on bf (hormonal thing). Sending hugs

Goodness especially as you haven't bf before you have done something SO wonderful for him and you should be so proud, you have given him the best start and maybe for your self esteem you could join a slimming club? Lots of my friends are members and it works well done my love you've done so well x

i have been dropping it over last few weeks, first a bedtime ff, then a ff in night to take him through night, a bottle of expressed became a ff then the afternoon feed became a ff. he only has 4 or 5 feeds now but take 7 oz at each. he is my last baby so my body will never do anything wonderful again. i am not a big bf campaigner or anything as i know it doesnt really matter but was surprised i took to it this time round! ff is a faff when you go out but am sure i will get used to it!

Oh Sparkly

You did all you could. If your DS was still hungry and being sick and not sleeping then swapping him to formula is the best thing you can do for him.

And he'll still rely on you for so many other things...nobody gives cuddles like a Mummy and nowhere feels as safe and warm as Mummy's arms after all.

You're doing the very best you can for him, you should be very proud of yourself.

my dp is going to a slimming world group ao we have all the stuff and i plan to publicly humiliate myself on facebook each week with what weight i have lost to spur me on. have cooked loads of yummy food and frozen it in ice cubes and even done finger foods for when ready to move onto that. honestly there is no room in freezer for our food .... so much for ds in there xx

i am sobbing still.....is it normal to feel like this.... am so scared my pnd will come back now.

I know I would feel very down if we had to stop bf. But I you have done SO well and grown your DS so beautifully!!

If you focus on the positive it will help with all those sad feelings.

ds is just so massive.... 21lb 1oz. i did that!!

Exactly!!

Morning,
Sparkly - I hope you are feeling brighter this morning. I can only re-voice what others have already said. Your DS is thriving and that is down to you and now he is ready for the next step. By the sound of things you are getting all ready in the best way for him too with all the preparation you are doing!

Up early here. DD woke up an hour later than normal for feeds - i.e. 2.30 then 6.30am. I guess the light at 6.30 was enough for her to feed then stay awake! Not sure what that is going to do for our nap schedule but I am pretty sure I will be having one when she does.

Did a big shop yesterday and I have all the food in the house I will need. Going to make a lovely chunky veg/bean soup later which will last a couple of days. I bought rainbow trout too which we had last night with new potatoes and salad. Trying to keep as low fat as possible. Now the weather seems to be improving I am determined to lose this weight.

Sparkly - well that sounds like a good plan, get out in the sun too it does wonders for me there is a publication about breastfeeding e titles something like 'reasons to be proud' and ittellls you what breastfeeding up until a certain point has acheived, I thought maybe you could google it and see what you and your body have already done for your son and as for your body never being amazing again - it IS amazing everyday, as it houses you as YOU are what your babies need, and will need for decades to come.

Sparkly, sounds like you have a good plan and again can only reiterate what everyone else has said. I was just looking at the facebook group and saw your profile picture - you ds looks gorgeous, definitely well nourished and extremely happy and as you say you did that and it is an amazing thing!

Hope you're feeling happier today and the sun is shining where you are.

he is gorgeous.....i like my facebook piccy of him having his first suck of chocolate..... how naughty. i bf him this morning but only expressed a few ounces last night..... when not expressing at night will see if i can still do first feed of day...... the little so and so was lovely and settled after me this morning for first time in ages as if he is saying..... dont even think about not letting me have this one!!! if i only feed once a day for a while a suppose its still there if ever desperate...... maybe i am just clutching at straws. apart from not satisfying him he is physically difficult to bf now when out anywhere.... he is in 6-9 and 9-12 months clothes but still has little control so he is a dead weight. i cant physically hold him without many props and my big boobs mean its difficult aswell.

thanks everyone i really need this support xxx

have read the reasons to be proud publication and yes i am chuffed to have got this far and seriously hope i can keep doing one feed a day and ds will still get the benefits then xx

sparkly - you've done a great job getting this far especially with him being so big. Be proud of yourself.

How was your day Sparkly, hope you're feeling better.

not the best day.... ds just wants to sleep and is grumpy when awake and i dont know whether to give him a bottle or food or just latch him back on...... its such a change even though i have been doing it gradually x

Could he just be having a grumpy day? dd had one of those yesterday, didn't want to play or do anything with anyone all day, wanted to sleep all day and only stayed awake for about an hour at a time at most all afternoon. Today however, she was her normal cheery self, so hopefully you'll have a chirpier ds tomorrow as well.

i hope so.... still not sparkly since his 16 week jabs!!

Morning all,
Maybe our LOs are having a different type of 4-month growth spurt in the form of resting. DD slept a LOT yesterday too - I actually started making moves to wake her at 4.30pm and after and bath etc. that she couldn't keep her eyes open past 6.30pm. They are doing so much growing!

DD has her 16 week jabs today . I am glad that they are the last for a while, it really upsets me. It's the bigger of the three injections? i.e. the triple? How did yours get on with the after effects, any worse that the previous two?

ds2 was fine after his 16 week jabs. Had a bit of a sleepy day but that's all.

sparkly - hope you & your ds are feeling more sparkly today.

ds1 is off to a friends house this afternoon so will have some time to myself while he's out & ds2 is asleep. Will be spending it ironing school uniform & deeply exciting stuff like that but will still be doing it in peace & quiet.