Fab Feb 2009 bar: toddle on in, grab a pew: mummy's in need of a drink or two...

[dinkystinky]

New thread for us to natter on about our toddling terrors... complete with some virtual booze. Mine's a french martini....

Have a great night tonight STW. Sorry DD is still a little lost soul - must be so hard for you and her loved ones to see, but it is a good thing I think that you're getting so much support. Fingers crossed you manage to squeeze everything in ok.

Have you heard of Temple Grandin, STW? She's an amazing autistic woman who has written loads on the subject. The way I see it and Thinking in pictures are the two books of hers I'm familiar with - a real insight on what it might be like. Amazon.

Thanks Ladies! Swampster will look at that book with interest. Have been watching Young, Autistic and Stagestruck on Chennel 4 with is good stuff too.

Shooting off home now then trowelling on the make up for tonight....

Have a good weekend in the sunshine all!

Hi all, thought I'd say hi to get back on Threads I'm on and then try and come back and catch up at some point.

C's walking has really only started in the last few weeks, about the same time as D started. I originally thought it would happen much earlier but he was very close to 14 months.

He only has a tiny number of words though he chats a lot when he's happy.

Wow at "Elefa" - Danny was given a copy of Dear Zoo for his first birthday though we didn't read it to him that much, because he went through a phase of not being interested in being read to from learning to walk at 14 months to around the time C turned up (21 months). He loves it now though. I bought my niece who's also a February 2009 baby a copy for her first birthday.

hello all, sorry you'd dropped off my threads I'm on and its all been very manic here.

DS1 and DD1 still here and clearly driving DH insane. He is shouting every day and just uses any excuse to screech at them and me. Have totally had enough of his bloody mood swings. Yesterday he went mad when DD2 (aged 3 1/2) accidentally knocked over a cup of water on the kitchen floor. Not the end of the bloody world bearing in mind we'd had a sandstorm the night before so the whole downstairs needed sweeping anyway. Anyway, he started Fing and blinding at her and I won't tolerate that. He has also sworn at H a few times for silly little things. For christs sake, he is a baby, he doesn't understand. DH says ridiculous things to H such as "I've told you twice not to do that" then looses his temper when he does. FFS. HE IS THE ONE THAT BLOODY WANTED CHILDREN. He just hasn't got the patience needed. He goes mad if/when thehy drop their toys on the floor (as kids do FFS) and I've had enough.

I'm leaving in June. Have contacted a nursery back home and also the local infant school to try to get DD and DS registered. Not putting up with this shit anymore.
Sorry for vent

DS1 and DD1 will be leaving early hours of Tuesday morning which BMI despite daily phone calls still insist is the earliest flight. Hopefully fuckwit will calm down a bit then so my last two months here won't be too unbearable. Is very sad as its only the last 6 months I've felt really settled. Happy Hands going well and 4 more have signed up and also I'd just applied (2 days ago) for the job of PA to the Defence Attache out here. Would have really been good as I've vegetated for too long. Oh well, never mind. It would just be nice to get an interview and to know someone is interested in me.

On a much happier note, H is much better. Day 2 of the steriods I noticed an improvement and on Thursday he suddendly started eating properly again which is great. Still wakes a few times at night but thank god he is not being sick.

Sorry to see lots of you have had all sort of bugs and illnesses.

SM poor J. He really has been in the wars.

swampy (I think?) hope the CP isn't too bad. Sometimes I wonder if its best to just let them all get it over with?

dinky how are things at work now? Hope a bit better after your outburst?

Ref walking, H has been walking since January and now climbs the stairs (which thankfully are not steep, just about 6 steps then a little landing then more steps, landing et) He is like a bloody chimp though. He escapes from his highchair at least 3 times every mealtime and this morning when I was taking DD to nursery he escaped from his P & T twice and ended up standing facing me. Even I struggle with the straps and I do them tight but he manages to wriggle around. Little rat.

Anyway, off to take him to mums and tots and hopefully wear himself out. Hope you all have a lovely (and accident free!) weekend x

mos It does sound like you and the dc's will be better off without him.
Have you told him you're leaving?
FWIW, I think you are very brave and strong for making this decision. Good for you. he doesn't deserve you. You spend so much time thinking and doing for others, he should be grateful he has such a lovely wife, but because he is an unreasonable twat, he has lost you.
You deserve much better.

@ H getting out of the push chair! Little monkey

As ds1 is better, dp wants us all to go swimming. I'm not 100% sure it's the best idea, but we'll see how we get on.

Oh Mos - I'm so sorry that DH is being an absolute fuckwit. You're right - its his issue, not yours - and you and the DC certainly dont need to put up with being treated the way he is treating you! I think you sorted out various stuff when you were in the UK and he buggered off to KSA in a strop and had got your head sort of round going it alone - you sounded strong then and you're sounding really strong now too: hope you're feeling as strong as you sound. Sending you hugs and strength. Glad that H is feeling better and wow at his exploits - maybe he can show you how to undo the straps on the P&T We only discovered how one of our childlocks worked when Danny showed us how to undo it Thanks for asking about work - its so much better nowadays - lets see how long it lasts though....

Elkie - lovely to see you on and hear how your boys are getting on

Good luck with swimming today SM - glad to hear J is better.

Been to Westfield with the boys and DH this morning to pick up the last of the stuff for DS1's birthday party tomorrow - fingers crossed the nice weather stays put for another day. We have swimming class this afternoon - though Danny has yet another bloody cold and is currently refusing to nap so will be anything but fun...

{{{hugs}}} mos, but from what I know of your situation over the last year i think you're doing the right thing... funny how the right thing is always so hard though isn't it?

fwiw i've lost the plot at dp's mood swings and given him ultimatums for what sounds like a lot less than what you've had to put up with so I personally think you've gone over and beyond the call of duty in giving the marriage a fair chance. He has repeatedly fucked up by being a horrendous arse to you and the kids and i don't think you could have done anything to change that about him... only made yourself and the kids as miserable as he is.

A has taken to trying to climb out of his trip trapp now... I really must remember to strap him in

Poor little dude has a rough morning today. DP was due to get up with them but they were all playing nicely so he was stealing a few more minutes in bed while the older two got dressed and A pottered about. Suddenly dd comes running in shouting 'Mommy, A's stuck!'

When i legged it into her room i found him with his foot caught in the floor of her wardrobe (one of those cloth and wood cheap ones from Argos... it has a slatted wood base which we've put her toy box on to save floor space as her room is a bit dinky). I couldn't get him free no matter what way i turned him and he was getting hysterical so dp had to run down and get a hammer and prise loose one of the slats to free him. He's got a nasty bruise and is limping a little but seems to be in good form so I don't think he'll need a doctor.

dinky... I always found swimming wore mine out so hopefully even if he's a nightmare there at least he'll nap afterwards for you

We had confirmation of how tiny A is this week, I had some 3-6 month clothes left on the table to give to my neighbour. I went out to drop the kids as usual while dp dressed A, and yes you've guessed it, came back to find him wearing the 3-6 month clothes as dp had assumed i left them out for A to wear. They fit him just fine too little bit snug but not noticeably so!

Tulips - sorry your DP is being an arse too at the moment. Hopefully the ultimatum will be the kick up the arse he needs. And poor A - that must have been so scary for all of you guys. Good to hear he seems ok - would do nurofen for the pain, arnica for the bruising and see how he gets on. Bless him. Love that story about the 3-6 month clothes. FWIW Danny is mostly in 12-18 month clothes BUT still fits into some of his 6 month trousers I'm unwilling to put away (and will be squeezed into those as long as I can possibly get away with it) and also needs 2 year old clothes in other styles so huge variance in clothes sizes if that makes you feel any better?

Oh, the ultimatum was ages ago... he's been much better recently. He even did a load of work in the garden for me the last few weeks and has been much better at helping out (although taking the kids out occasionally so i can work in peace would be nice!)

I gave the clothes away anyway couldn't quite face putting him in 3-6 months still but his clothes vary from size 6-9 months to 18-24 on some pants (cloth bum) although tbh i think a few of his t-shirts are still 3-6 months but i'm avoiding checking My poor neighbour won't be getting many more clothes from him soon i'd say, her lad will be as big as him soon! It's quite odd seeing him with the little girls at toddler group born at the same time as him as they're twice the size.

Tulips Poor A getting stuck in the wardrobe. Hope he's ok.

We didn't end up going swimming in the end. The boys were a bit tired, so I put them both to bed for a nap after lunch and Luke woke up an hour later with a temp of 39.
he's been really out of sorts this afternoon and a right old misery guts so we might be in for a night!

Glad he's pulled his socks up Tulips

SM - oh no, poor Luke. Hope he sleeps really deeply and well to shrug off the bug he's suffering from..

Hello all,
TITS (still makes me chuckle your new name) At least your arse pulled his socks. up. How scary about A, that really must have freaked you out.

H fell down a few steps at mums and tots club yesterday and has a huge carpet burn on his forehead poor little lamb.

He is still wearing some of his 6 - 9 months trousers (clearly doesn't take after his dad in the arse and belly department)

SM poor Luke, hope he is better now. Its awful when they are ill.

Typically I had four more people sign up for Happy Hands today so have started one more class. Have not mentioned to anyone that I'm leaving in the summer but such a shame its taken this long to get it really up and running and will only do one full term before I go.

mos caan you employ someone to keep the classes running for you? Seems a nice little business.
You might be able to start something up here

Luke is still poorly. temp was at 40 earlier!
Dp's just left for Wales again and I have Luke crying and Jacob taking a time-out in my bedroom for hitting mer in the face.

I have an idea for a July meet-up- have posted to FB.

Swampy A July meet-up would be great. Will look on fb now.

My poor baby
This is the first time all day I've been able to put him down and that's only because him and ds1 are feeding the cats throwing cat food around the hallway.

Roll on bedtime, although he's been in and out of sleep all day, so don't expect tonight to be any good.

I'm having a guilt moment too. When ds1 is ill, I have him in bed with me because I like to keep an eye on him.
I don't really feel Luke is ready to sleep in the big bed because I don't have a guard or anything for it, and he's not ready to fall out yet iykwim.

SM oh poor you, you really are having a hard time of it aren't you. Mind you DD2 is playing up at the moment. Think it is the excitement of having DS1 and DD1 here. Thank god they are leaving late tomorrow night and flying back to the UK overnight.

swampy ooh, I'm all excited now but not sure I'm on the FB page. Any clues anyone?
Hope its a child-free pamper weekend in a spa

lol mos swampy sent us all an event invitation that will show up on the top right hand corner of your screen.

My friend just dropped a bed guard round which means I can keep Luke with me tonight if he has trouble settling and needs his mum.
I'm going to start by putting him in his cot and if he gets bad in the night bring him in with me.
I imagine I'll have both the scamps in with me all week and dp will go mad at me for being 'soft' and it'll be left to him to re-train them into their own beds.

Luke's temp has fallen below 38 degrees for the first time today and he is now eating a salmon fish cake, so must be feeling a little better.
He has had half a cup of milk and a yoghurt today, and it is not like Luke to be off his food!

Evening/night all - quick post on here (was DS1's 4th birthday today so v busy day - he fell down the stairs this morning but was ok I think, just scared us senseless - he was playing with one of Danny's toys at the time despite us always telling him never to play with toys on the stairs - and then had his party with 22 kids this afternoon at local play area which was good but v much like semi-organised chaos) - SM hope Luke's better tonight. Bed guard is a good idea. Hope its a much better night for you.

MoS - poor H! Hope he's ok.

Danny was mostly looked after by DH's mum at the party today and he was brilliant with her - was really lovely to see him connecting so well with his grandma.

MOS - so sorry to hear your news. Hope the next couple of months aren't too bad for you before you get back to the UK. Poor H - ouch!

TITS - poor A getting stuck in the wardrobe! BTW my DS who has just turned 3 was wearing size 9 to 12 month trousers yesterday - looked great as shorts!

Dinky - Glad your DS1 had a lovely party, though sorry to hear about his tumble down the stairs..... I sometimes think that my DS is Mr Clumsy as he manages to trip over, sting his hands on nettles, run into the wooden clothes pole, graze his knees, get a splinter, bump heads, etc, at least once an hour!! He is currently sporting a lovely deep scratch across one eyelid and cheek after running into a hedge.....

SM how is Luke today?

Hello everyone!

Dinky sorry to hear about DS1's tumble down the stairs. Sounds like he had a good party though! 22 kids is a lot to keep under control! 4 year old sounds so grown up... In no time at all it'll be Danny!

MOS - you have a lot on your plate right now, but sounds like you are doing the right thing. When's your interview for the PA job? Hope it goes well and gives you a boost. Is it tomorrow that DS1 and DD1 depart? Do they know what's going on with DH? Glad to hear H is on the mend.

SM - how was your night with Luke? Hope he continued to feel better after his salmon fishcake!

Elkidee - how are things with you?

We had a busy weekend - my school reunion on Friday was great fun! Was a bit to hear that pne of the girls from my year is a grandmother!! There were a few there with kids of 14/15 years old which seems a world away. I'm feeling a bit blue about DD, who seems to be getting even more withdrawn - we were at a friend's for a BBQ yesterday and she spend 4 hours in the living room on her own playing with a helicopter while everyone else was out playing in the garden. And that was after crying for an hour, stuck to my side. I really need to get some guidance on how to deal with her. Am feeling very tearful at the moment and starting to feel like I did after Sam was born, so I may take a trip to the GP for myself soon.....

Anyway, I'm pretending to do some work and should get back to the real thing now but will be catching up later. xxx

Hi all.
dinky Glad the party went well.
Hope ds1 is ok after his fall.

Luke seemed alot better this morning so we went to playgroup, but then he got all glazed over in the eyes again so we are now back at hoime and he is asleep on the sofa after a dose of calpol and ds1 is watching walking with dinosaurs.
taking Luke to docs later as I can def smell an infection on him

Jacob has hid referal to the ENT's, i just have to collect the letter from the doc and make the appointment.

Calico - I often call DS1 Mr Bump as he's so accident prone. Think its a function of little boys running everywhere at full pelt - their brains just cant catch up...

SM - glad you got your referral but sorry Luke has taken a turn for the worse again. Hope the doctors can tell you if he needs ABs or something.

STW - sending you big hugs for your worries. Some children are put off by lots of kids in one place (especially a strange place) and lots of noise - not necessarily being withdrawn, more a function of being a little bit more sensitive and not at home in group situations. Hopefully the programme you're signing up to for you and DD will help you and her learn how to ease her into situations like that - she's fine in places she knows (like the childminders) from what you've said before so hopefully its more of a case of a confidence building exercise. And most kids I know aged 2 or 3 would prefer to play with toys by themselves (less risk of someone else nicking their toys ) than in a big noisy group outside.

Danny has another cold and we're running perilousy low on tissue supplies at home (I swear our tissue consumption has quadrupled since Danny came along). Anyone else amazed at how much snot such a tiny nose can produce?

Thanks Dinky! She is happy at nursery but still doesn't speak there, and in fact hasn't spoken to me or DH since we got home yesterday . She just sings Postman Pat . I know what you mean about wanting to keep toys to yourself - it worked yesterday!! And at least I didn;t have to worry about her misbehaving .

So much snot! One of our favourite nicknames for Sam is actually "The Snotter". We have about 20 muslins from when he was a sicky baby which we now use as huge handkerchiefs (I have no idea how to spell that!!) because we were getting through boxes and boxes of tissues too!

I'm trying to get in touch with my brother who was supposed to be running in the marathon yesterday as part of the human caterpillar that Princess Beatrice was running in - but I find no evidence of him running. Hope he wasn't having us on. Grrrr.

the missing caterpillar man...sounds intriguing. do keep us updated STW.
so sorry to hear you're struggling a bit still with your dd. she does sound very sensitive and i can't imagine how upsetting it must be when she doesn't talk to you but at least you've got some acknowledgement that there's a potential problem which will give you something to focus on. and i guess try not to compare her too much to others just keep on with what makes her happy.
sounds completely patronising but my dd who is usually quite confident (ask dinky!) does tend to retreat a bit at parties.

dinky happy 4th birthday to ds. wow, how did that happen? have you got him sorted into a school for september or do they do staggered entry where you are?

SM sounds like you're having a horrible run of sicknesses with your boys. and brilliantly timed to coincide with your dp's absence of course! hope they get better soon and you're not too exhausted.

mos so sorry to hear twatface is up to his old tricks. he really doesn't cope well when your 2 eldest are around does he? the bit that sounds the worst though is the verbal putting down of you. just not acceptable and especially when it must be so hard keeping your confidence up having up sticks, given up your career etc. if you do decide it's untenable to stay you'll do brilliantly back here. you've done your counselling course and the signing teaching so you'll have plenty to fall back on.

swampy brilliant idea for a meet up. i lived in brixton for years but haven't been back to the show since i left just before dd was born. i can't wait.

I has had conjunctivitis and a horrible rash (rough and sort of excema-ish, all over his body but not concerning him in any way). meant he couldn't have his mmr jab last week! he seems much better today and he's also a complete moutaineering fool. back turned for one minute and he's climbed onto the garden chair, then onto the garden table where he proudly stood up and clapped himself.

work is still pretty grim but not quite as manic as it has been. there's a BIG leaving do this Thurs for all those that have left. oh god help me on friday morning!