May 2009 - Don't forget to wear your good shoes...

[belgina]

Right, new thread...

Sorry about the title

Cocktail anyone?

Hi all!

Was about to go to bed but came on to catch up a bit so I was ready to make a detailed post tomorrow lol

Just wanted to say quick:

Jael In the last thread I made a post for you about what you have been going through. I don't think you will have seen it but I will try to go back and send it to you in FB. I am glad you are back and I hope that maybe what I posted will help in some small way...

Ok I will make my longer and more detailed post in the morning when the letters are not blurring in front of my eyes lol

Night!

Pula Sorry to post and run last night. What I was trying to say is R is sleeping better but still waking twice or on a good night only once and he has gone through 3 times now . This is from waking every 2 hours before Christmas. I did try CC for about 5 nights and I sent DH in with water but he was getting worse not better so I decided to feed him if it had been more than 3/4 hours but do it sitting up so I wasn't tempted to let him sleep with us. Or I'd nudge DH and make him put him back . He has had back to back colds since christmas and has grown 2 new teeth (up to 8 now ) so some nights haven't been great but on the whole he has improved so much. Last night he woke at 11 and 4.30 and then woke for the day at 7.30.

DD was a fantastic sleeper and slept through from 9 weeks and whenever she got into bad habits after teething or being away she responded straight away to a little light 'training' and was back to 12 hours sleep. Someone told me yesterday that sleeping is just like any other skill that some babies can naturally do and others take longer. I hope that soon R will learn the skill of sleeping through the night with some regularity.

I really feel for you with work and 2 other DCs thrown into the mix.

Ses Naughty Megan she sounds like a handful!!

Oneborneverymintue I was swinging between telling that redhead girl to pull herself together and totally empathizing. Labour is really bloody painful isn't it!! Her mum was a great support to her- very level headed. Made me miss my mum .

Hi everyone,

Hope you had good nights.

pula I was thinking about what you said about the sleep training and the baby wisperer. You do wonder about all those baby training methods (GF, BW) and which way around it is. Is it the babies sort of naturally taking on the prescribed routines and mums thinking it works or do they follow the routines because the traing works.

jael Nice to see you back. I had been worried about how you were doing, but it looks like things are on the up again.

younger @ the body massage. Bet it was loooovvverlly.

C had a good night. I didn't. I think the thought of going back to work, having a new ap, etc... is making me a little stressed and I'm not sleeping very well at the moment. Hope this will pass soon, because I'm tired and my exzema is playing up.

I've got a quick question about baby's breakfasts. C's not taking hers this week. As I said yesterday she feeds at 2.30 and 5.30. We have breakfast around 8. At what time do your babies have their breakfast? Do they eat with the rest of the family or do they eat theirs later, due to the morning milk? At what time do your los normally have their morning milk?

Right. AP is up. Better be sociable again. Hmm, this ap business really is going to eat into my internet time

morning belgina. S has his breakfast at 8am with the rest of us, and usually has 1 weetabix (quick and easy on a school day) and on weekends will often have some fruit, yogurt and/or toast too. Even with all his night feeds and often a morning feed around 7, he usually is ready for breakfast by 8. He has refused it on the odd day, but i think that was more due to cold or teething.

I am sure you and your AP will find a good balance between being sociable and having some private time soon . I have a laptop and DH uses the PC. Laptops are pretty cheap ATM so once you are back at work I am sure you can convince DH to get one- maybe saying your AP might want to use your computer too.

Well last night wasn't tooo bad really. After waiting up for S to have a feed, I went to bed around 11.30 and then he woke at 11.50 . Made sure he had both boobs and put him back (asleep) in the cot in our room at 12.20. He was up again at 3.10 so i fed him and kept him with me (I really need to stay awake!). I then woke around 4.45 and rolled over but this disturbed him, so i fed him again and then we slept until 6.45. So I really need to try getting him back in his cot and see if he will then sleep til morning. When he hadn't woken by 11.30 i started to think he was going to sleep through but i do this quite often (wishful thinking) .

Pula I don't really have much advise but I will tell you what I do. DD1 was a bad sleeper and did not sleep through the night until after she was 1. When she would wake I would feed her but I would also pick her up. With DD2 I started to express bottles and give her them at night but I would not pick her up. I sit on the floor by her and feed her through the bars holding her hand or whatever. When she is done I leave. She is also a thumb sucker which may help. When I started the bottle thing she would wake a few times a night but now she either sleeps through 12 hours or wakes once. I am not sure if this made a difference but so different from DD1.

belgin I a glad your ap got there safe and sound and that she seems nice! Re breakfast: I usually wait 30 min to an hour to feed S so usually she eats seperate. Some days she eats more than others but if she is not in the mood for breakfast I know she is still getting enough through the day iykwim? So I wouldn't worry as we all have days!

London I am so too. As I have been away I only found out about it last week but I would really love to come! I am just way to far up by Edinburgh I hinted at DH that he could watch DDs and I would go but he didn't respond so I guess that is a no then! lol

onenborneverymin Ohhhh I missed last weeks but this made me want more babies! Red hair girl was a little OTT but I was prob the same with DD1 lol can't really remember I was going to post in AIBU and ask if I was for wanting to have more babies even if I didn't have the space or money? If I want tons of kids should my life situation stop me or should I just go for it and make it work as I would do anyway? I would love like 4 or more maybe but for reasons above I keep telling myself no and it does not seem fair

Anyway, DH woke last night with some mysterious being sick every 5 min illness so I have decided not to go to swimming as I don't want to leave him with S or bring her and put her in the creche.

DD1 is getting her first salon hair cut today! I have always trimmed her bangs but think it is time someone else takes over

I also got a much needed cut yesterday! I feel like a new woman and it was just a trim and shape lol DH keeps playing with it so I guess he likes it too!

Right, off to get through the mountain of washing! Joy! Hope you all had a good night

morning
glad last night was a bit better pula we had a later start with ds this am 5.45am so feeling less bleary than after yesterdays 4.30am start. G still sleeping until 6.30am ish for which i'm very grateful.
jael glad to see you back. is your dh better now?
younger clarins massage.. last time i got round to something like that was before dc's when we still lived in edinburgh.. Ooo must have felt gooood.
belgina glad your ap arrived safe and that she seems a good un. i'm sure you'll soon have a routine that's comfortable for both of you to do your own things when you have a bit of spare time.
emmab i'm like you.. i'd keep going wrt to more dc's. not sure how we'd manage it on just dh's income or in our flat here.. but with the prospect of going through a 3rd cs at 40ish with 2 little uns more will not be planned but if an accident happened then we'd just go along with it.
breakfast varies a bit here for G depending on when she wakes and whether it's a pre school day. if she wakes after 7.30am she'll just have 2boobs (she likes one boob.. a 30min break.. then the other) and breakfast after coming back from pre school at 9.30am ish. on a normal day it's boobs 6.30am /7am and breakfast after at 8ish before school run.
.. back in a bit.. washing ready to hang out..

and breakfast usually weetabix with bit of milk and fruit puree or if I've made a batch for the freezer.. home made rice pudding with fruit puree.

Morning! The sky is blue and it is A Good Day today! (even if DH was a twat last night and slept in the spare room)

Pula omg you poor, poor thing. I have been extremely lucky with M who goes down after her bath, play and bottle each night on the dot-ish around 7.30 - 8. She goes to sleep by herself in the dark with no crying or anything, but I know she is still awake as she's chucking her bunny about which has a jingly tummy. She has got into a habit though of sort of waking once in the night with her head jammed in the corner of the cot and she can't move. Duh. We sort have done CC with her in the day, and I read somewhere that you shouldn't leave them for longer than 20 minutes. Well, I did that the other day and by the time I picked her up she wouldn't stop that huh-huh-huh post-sobbing juddering. Horrid. I think you need to do work best for you, but my only tip is that at the mo, it sounds like he knows who's boss of the two of you, and currently that's him! He's getting all the loveliness and snuggles and cosy sleeping all night long PLUS lots of decent nosh in the day. I don't know if CC is really the way to go - it may be - but I think a chat with the HV is definitely going to be a good start. And re the ADs issue - of course you are going to sob your heart out - you are bloody knackered and haven't slept properly for, like, ever. Sleep deprivation is a common torture instrument in some bonkers countries! You are doing brilliantly (esp by judging by your FB pics) so please don't beat yourself up about it.

There. Hope that makes sense?

Breakfasts - M always has a bottle first thing which she never finishes as she is too excited to be UP - usually around 7ish (or earlier like 6ish like today when knob-like husband gets up early for work and homps about everywhere waking us all up) - I then usually open her curtains, stick the radio on, get her out of her sleeping bag, give her some toys in the cot, and get up myself (or sneak in a quick 5 minute power snooze if I can't just focus yet) and shower, get dressed with M mooching about my room generally creating havoc by emptying the bin, pouring my cold tea all over herself, eating my inhaler, eating the hairdryer wire, licking the mirror, getting carpet burns on her knees at the rate she crawls, opening drawers, finding tissues, pulling them all out the box, ripping them all, eating them, choking, ..... you get the picture..... anyway, about an hour or so later we go down for breakfast (sounds like we're at a hotel!) and usually have weetabix or porridge with some fruit in. Arse about the house for a bit till about 1030ish then she goes for a snooze for about an hour or so. Yes, I am that strict with her routine, but hey, it works, and I know exactly when she will be asleep and when I can Get Stuff Done.

Spangle - gwan get on the train on Friday! I haven't tackled public transport yet with M either (ok I did when she was 2 weeks old in the pouch, but that doesn't count)

PhD - still not heard anything back. Arses. My uni is a stones throw from where the big meet up is on Friday so maybe we could all throw paddington bear stares that way? Either that or walk past sticking our fingers up and shout obsene things? (sorry, how juvenile!)

Dandy - got any bagel and cream cheese spare? With a spot of smoked salmon? Am starving.....

hopalong- thanks for your motivational post. My eyes started to well up, but I decided to be "stiff upper lippish" as I am sat at my desk surrounded by colleagues. Thanks for the advice on CC. I agree that S is certainly the boss in the night, but that is why it upsets me to stop his "privileges" as he doesn't understand why i am refusing to feed him. So either he needs a strict few days/nights to get used to the new routine, or i will wait until he is 12 months and understands a bit more. I will see what my HV says if i get an appointment.

Your post made me . M sounds like bundles of fun. It's funny how they all have a fascination with the same things . S loves doors, but hasn't yet worked out how to get through a door which opens towards him- he ends up banging it on his face or getting his face jammed as he tries to push through . Of course, i am watching this out of curiosity to see if his problem-solving skills are improving and not to watch him hurt himself .

Oh and i was very proud yesterday to talk in front of my directorate at work via video link (about 50 people in all)- something i previously would get very anxious about. I was still nervous but did well so my confidence is improving .

Hello all,

Having a child free day today. DS1 at holiday club and R in nursery. So, the plan was to hit the gym (tick), bit of housework (tick) and then hair appointment at 3. Hairdresser is sick so have had to rearrange. Gah. So am MNing instead! Still have the laundry to sort out though and dinner to think about.

pula sorry to read about your nights. We had one good night this week, one mediocre night and normal service resumed by R last night so I feel your pain. We keep hoping that he will just sort himself out rather than having to resort to CC. Which I am prepared to do, but you have to be ready yourself I think and I'm not there yet. pula would you be able to see it through do you think?

saus LOL at your mornings.

jael good to see you back and glad things are on the up. Good luck with the cooking! Have you got Jamies Ministry of Food book? Its really good for basic recipes and are all easy to do.

belgina hope the AP is working out well. Isn't the idea to give you more MN time rather than reduce it??????

breakfast time Our mornings generally start about 6.15am. R is awake. Probably in our bed. He has a bottle between then and about 7.15am. Breakfast for all about 7.30am. I seem to remember with DS1 not giving him a bottle before breakfast in the hope that he would be hungrier and therefore eat more. It was a HV who said that I should switch it, as he would more likely be thirsty than hungry so to do it the other way round. She likened it to having a cup of tea before breakfast! I am very much a person who has to have a coffee before I even think about getting out of bed (DH is pretty good in this regard and will generally bring one up to me before he goes to the gym ) so I switched it around. No idea now if it had any impact on DS1's breakfast but it doesn't seem to dampen R's appetite!

Oops. Went on a bit there.

But can I just big myself up for a minute?? Remember my lovely orange dress I linked to last thread. Its only the no 1 must have this week in Heat magazine. . Just call me for fashion advice anytime!!! Maybe I should head over to Style and Beauty to impart my wisdom over there? ROFL. As I sit here in my sweat pants and slippers.

Hello ladies,

One of my HV just rang to discuss Ss sleep. She suggests either CC (going in every 15 mins, keep contact to a minimum etc) but be prepared for up to 2 hours crying.

Or stay with him, sit near the cot and pat to calm him but to stop before he falls asleep.

Also to make sure he doesn't fall asleep feeding etc, and to not feed AT ALL at night. And whatever i decide, the key point is consistency.

She will ring me back on Friday to see how things are going, so I feel i should try one approach tonight.

I guess I knew all this, but it's reassuring that she thinks he doesn't need milk, and maybe he isn't drinking in the day because he's filling up at night.

Pula - sounds like you have a sensible HV there! Best of luck with it tonight!

Headless - oooh I bought Heat today! What is it with Jordan's wrinkly eyes?! I too have convinced DH that a cup of tea in bed in the mornings is mandatory. I got one today. Huzzah!

I am GOING OUT!!!! With old work friends! Just putting some slap on then heading into Laaahndan taaahn daaaahn Soho and drink tons. (oh and also go for a small meal too)

My God, I am quite giddy with excitement.

Pula - sounds good advice all round. Nice that the HV has offered to phone back. That would at least make me feel like there's opportunity to review and adjust as needed.

saus - yay for going out!!

Headless - ooh get you!! V impressed

emmab - hope your DHh is recovered

breakfast - I normally feed O lying down in bed around 6.30am as DH gets up for work. This often ends up being a nice lazy snuggly time and then around 7.45am, I get O up and changed and put him downstairs in his playpen with Fireman Sam on telly whilst I get ready and have a shower. We then have breakfast together around 8.30am. I hate cereal so we normally have toast and marmite or jam followed by a piece of fruit and sometimes some yoghurt.

It was a lovely day here today so I took O and the 2 dogs for a walk across the nearby field. We all had a lovely time

Good luck tonight Pula.

R is teething AGAIN (or maybe getting sick) and has been miserable all day. I had to sling him while I did some cleaning as he was grizzling constantly. I put him on my front facing outwards in the Kari me and he was grabbing everything we came near . I made some spinach and cheese muffins today as I wanted to give the dcs something different for tea/snacks did they eat it? Nooooooooooo. I ended up making pasta, brocoli and cheese which they both loved. I have been eating the blardy things all afternoon .

Breakfast R usually wakes at 7ish so I feed him in bed and then we have breakfast at 8ish. DCs usually have porridge and then steal my toast.

So far so good tonight. Made sure S was awake at bedtime, and then put him down. Cue lots of crying and sitting up, but decided to stay with him and go over to him now and again to lie him down or calm him. He really wanted to suck on something, but after 20 mins went to sleep with my hand firmly on his back and no patting etc.

We (DH and I) have decided we're not ready to go cold turkey on night feeds just yet so I will feed him if he wakes before midnight but will try to resettle him if he wakes between 12 and 5, and I am hoping that him getting used to going to sleep independently will mean less waking and easier re-settling. We will see . But i feel empowered after he settled better than last night, and I am hoping in a couple more nights he will go to bed without a fight...

saus - hope you have a great night out

febes- hope R feels better soon and that your night is not too bad.

headless- I missed your comment about the orange dress- I better try and get mine ordered before they sell out (maybe i'm too late already)...

jael- great to have you back and sounding so positive. I am glad that J is developing well - sounds like he is going to be advanced, like his big sister .

Good luck pula. SOunds like you're off to a good start so far. Hope it goes well.

febes I'll have one of your spinach and cheese muffins. They sounds delish!

Saus have a fun night out. I'll have the nurofen ready for you in the morning.....and make sure you come home with both shoes on.

DS1 has been a monkey this evening. We are still having a few poo issues. I sent him off for one as it was obvious from his face and jiggling that it was imminent. 10 mins later he has not returned. The reason? He decided it was a good idea to put two toilet rolls in the loo. So I've decided it would be a good idea for Ben 10 and the Wii to be banned tomorrow.

Watching the ladies downhill now. 2 spectacular crashes so far. Both walked away, thank god. Quite how one of them did .

Thanks for the welcomes

DP is getting there now, he's going back to hospital in 2 weeks so i'll be alone again, but i'm feeling more positive now about coping with the DC by myself

LadyH No I don't have that book, DP has 2 Jamie O books but their Italy ones I think I've never done much cooking in our house with DP being an ex-chef so I'm abit out of my depth lol I'm managing casseroles, and cottage pie don't think i'll be on MasterChef anytime soon!

Breakfast J will generally have a feed at 6am but recently he's been missing his feed and just going straight for his breakfast at 8am. With advice from our HV weve just started J on cereals, so far he's eating cheerios and rice crispies for breakfast, and he'll polish off a huge bowl. So he has weetabix twice a week, porridge twice a week and cereals the other days.

We'd normally be driving down south to visit DP's parents as it's half term, but can't do the long journey...So I've got DD here with me alllll week.

Jael X

pula sounds like you have a great HV and have a plan.. good start this evening.. fingers crossed by the weekend you'll be seeing some improvement x
febes we've got teething here too... G's been grisling every time I popped her down to play... well almost every time... she was very happy when she got hold of my crocs and ds's wellies
headless how did the rest of your dc free day go? shame you had to re-organise your hair appointment... it one thing i REALLY need to squeeze in atm

ooo yes the dresses! loved them both (and the others) too

yippee i've ordered my M&S orange dress for delivery on Saturday. I have 2 christenings coming up (my 2 little nephews) so I am sure it will be good for one of those - headless- please let me know how it copes with a cold machine wash rather than a dry clean. Whilst i was on I also bought DD a dress/leggings, cardi and red shoes . Not sure why i buy her so many clothes when she wears school uniform 5 days a week but just can't resist kids clothing .

Evening everyone,

Thanks for all the replies re breakfast. That's how it used to be with us and the last few days it isn't, really making me think that C might be having too much milk in the night. I will try and start to feed her a bit less at night and see how it goes.

I have just had my 1st few shifts for when I start work. Eeek and double eek. Looks like it'll be labour ward (pissing myself emoticon). I had hoped to avoid lates, but my 1st ever shift will be a late . I hope DH will be around to provide support to the ap at bedtime. C's never ever ever been put to bed by anyone else but me due to the boob factor. I might have to reliquish the bedtime to someone else before going back to work as a trial. Don't want to though, because bedtime is my special cuddly sleepy time with C . I'm going out with some friends next wed, so that might be the time to do it.

saus Enjoy your evening out. Hope it's a good one!!

pula Sounds like sensible advice. I'm sure consistency is definitely the key. I did a similar thing as you've done with dd1, I stayed with her and then slowly slowly moved away once she could settle with me just next to her, until I was finally just out the door. It worked and wasn't too traumatic for either of us, but took nearly a month. With C I'm going to have to start a similar approach. She'll happily fall asleep without me touching her, but I need to be somewhere she can see me. But I think it'll be easier to move away from that than moving away from falling asleep at the boob, like what you've got to do.

febes Poor R. Hope those teeth stop playing up soon.

headless I did have to smile at your ds putting 2 loo rolls down the toilet.