November 09 babies are growing up quick, and mummy's getting used to getting covered in sick!

[PreggoK8]

Hope this has worked...

So many posts where do I start...

re HV I really struggled with all the conflicting opinions/orders from different HV until i met a lovely councillor at baby clinic who said there are no rules and i should do what i thinkis right as i'm the mum!

ursi both of my ds have had bcg as its compulsory in paris (v high rates of tb) neither had a reaction but then they never have for the other vaccinations (noteven slightly off colour) SO maybe i just have tough kids??

No tummy time or playmat here ds is only happy when he's sitting straight up on the settee or standing up!!He seemsto be moving straight from tiny baby to toddler!!

Right must start packing as only 2 days to go till back in the UK

Lemontop great news on the sleep and get rid of that guilt sharpish! As Fruit said, there's no manual so you just have to make it up as you go along. It's the same for those of us who've done it before too.
There's no rhyme or reason to it sometimes - I tried giving Ioan a bf last night at 11 as hadn't done the bottle, and he slept the same as if he'd had formula (normal and hungry baby!) so now I am confused as to what might help. The only thing I can deduce is that he will sleep through until he's ready to wake! All I do to check if it's hunger is give him his dummy the first time he wakes, sometimes it can buy me another hour, sometimes only 10 mins!!

Got Ioan a little play nest thing yesterday, courtesy of hte mothercare vouchers for opening his trust fund account He loves it as it helps him sit up. Maybe he's going to follow in his mother's footsteps and be happy to just sit. I didn't walk until about 18 months Handy for knowing they won't go anywhere from where you've put them!!

I agree with whoever said we can't expect them to sleep through the night yet - it's just a bonus if they do. James seems to either do a mammoth 8/9 hour stretch or wake every 2-3 hours through the night, and there is no rhyme nor reason to it as far as I can tell. To be honest, I seem to be just as tired whether he's had a good night or a bad one, so I'm going to stop thinking about it for a while.

I'm a bit worried about DH. He told me last night he's not enjoying it this time and feels so stressed. Basically, he is stressed at work all day, then gets home just as we are all at our worst and feels like he has no time to unwind. James generally cries all evening unless feeding or being cuddled; DD is tired and grumpy as she doesn't nap any more; I am worn out after a day with the two of them (DH didn't say all this BTW, but it is true).
I'm quite lucky in that he does the late shift with James - I normally go to bed before James and leave DH with a bottle of EBM. I don't want to give this up! But I am trying to think of ways to make DH's life easier without making mine any harder. Any ideas??
I am thinking that DD and I could eat earlier (we normally all eat together when DH gets in) so that by the time DH gets in she is winding down rather than tired and hungry. This seems a bit sad to me as I've always liked us eating together, but it might be more practical. What time do your older DCs eat?

Hope you're feeling better Ninja and Sleepless?

Those with teething babies, apparently the bit that hurts them most is as the tooth is moving up the gum, but before it breaks through - so all this pain that looks like nothing is going on is actually progress.

Laugs I'm sorry you're worrying about DH. I'm sure there are some ways that you can both make life work better for you. My DH has a stressful job with long hours (at times) and he's goes away a lot. My DH tends to get home at around 6.30pm. DS can't hold out for meal time any later than 6pm to eat so I normally have him fed by 5.30pm and his bedtime is 7.30pm (he is 4) I normally do meals together of a weekend. I'm hoping that once I start weaning DS2 on to solids then both DC can eat together at a set time each day. I don't feel guilty about not doing family meals each day. I just try and fit them in when I can. I also try and give DS a shower before DH comes home so DS is in his PJ's snuggled on the sofa waiting for Daddy to come home. These early months don't last forever and before we know it we'll have more time to ourselves and the nights (hopefully) will become so much easier

Lemon, you really shouldn't feel guilty. And I don't think you overfed him, he had probably just less during the day then. Just be happy that there is some progress into the right direction.
I'm sure that I often overfeed Paula at night as she only needs a snack in the morning. But she has now periods where she is really wide awake and it is the only way of making her sleep. This night she was actually drinking a lot. I'm always trying to feed her more during the day to make sure she doesn't need that much at night but sometimes she just doesn't want more.
And this night it might actually have been too hot and that's why she was so thirsty.

Laugs, I'm a first timer so no experience with hungry toddlers. But would it be an option to let your DD eat earlier and then, when daddy eats have just a little snack, like an apple as a dessert? This way you would still sit around the table and have some nice family time?

Ursi I must thank you for the kick up the arse even if it is a "do as I say not as I do" kick.

I have been making soup, yesterday Curried Butternut Squash and today Carrot, Cumin and Coriander. 4WW points in each batch (could make them for nil point but I add 1tbsp veg oil, 1tbsp Bullion for taste) mmmm.

I've also changed my coffee order to filtered white or tea instead of Latte/hotchoc etc.. oh and no cake on the side.

All very obvious I know but I have been finding it hard to face up to the problem.

Laugs I am good thanks. Alfie slept from 9pm until 7.45am today and is asleep again now so pretty relaxed (although I have to get ready for Baby massage at 10.15). Sorry to hear your dp is finding things tricky. Hold tight it will get easier x

Meetup I'll be walking or catching the bus over to Ikea so 12 is good. They always used to have a cresh so presume there is still one.

Lemon glad you had a long sleep, but do NOT feel guilty! I don't think you can overfeed babies unless you're pouring milk down their throats. They won't eat if they're not hungry/thirsty.

Laugs I like Ursi's idea of a little snack while Daddy eats dinner, so you can still all sit around the table. Even a mug of warm milk or something sleep-inducing?

Well... I feel like an idiot and a bad mama. I was inhaling Nutella last night while Lukas slept. Was feeling all cozy and indulgent... Until 2AM when Lukas woke up feeling poorly. We were awake until 4AM, he couldn't sleep, vomited a couple of times, and I got a migrane in the end... so it backfired, big time. Oh well, no more Nutella for me!

Thanks for the ideas fruit and ursi. I think I will try a combination of this. DD has a bath in the morning, but I'm going to try giving dinner at 5.30, then get her in her jammies and when DH gets in she can have a yoghurt with us. Speaking of diets, I can imagine ending up eating two dinners this way! Actually, DH picks her up from nursery twice a week, so we will still all eat together then and at the weekend. I think it's a good compromise.

Sounds like you are doing well with the diet Ninja. I am rubbish. I'll make soup but then have to eat it with a big chunk of bread and proper butter... Coffee and cakes also my downfall. I am seriously addicted to coffee again. I actually get a headache if I am running late.

Laugs Ds1 is 4 and I've started to feed him earlier most days now. To avoid cooking two meals I have become the queen of one pot cooking casseroles (buy the sachets to mix in, much easier and quicker), big vats of bolognaise or even things like sausage and mash which dh can reheat. DD sometimes eats with DS1 depending on if she has clubs etc.
I've also started bathing both boys together every other night or so. I bought a hard plastic seat for Ioan from mothercare and it's brilliant. It's hard enough that he can lay in it without any support from me and he kicks his legs having a whale of a time. DS1 then 'helps' me wash him and as it's hands free I can easily wash DS1 and his hair. I do get dh to come up and help with getting them out but if I start it just as he's coming in, it buys him 15 mins chill time in front of the news.
The other thing we've started is storytime in my bed when I'm feeding Ioan and settling him. DS1 now chooses books and brings them up and I read whilst feeding. DH will do teeth and pj's then send DS1 up. Buys him another half an hour to chill/warm up tea/ do the dishes and I get to have some nice quality time with the boys that doesn't feel like a chore. DS1 really enjoys this as it's proper time for him, Ioan is just along for the ride iyswim.
It's not much, but it does give dh a little time to unwind after work and I don't resent it as I'm getting some of the fun bits with the boys. DH does all of the morning routine with DS1 and in the night, and I do all of Ioan's night and morning.

Another one here accepting that a full night's sleep is a way away, and feeling better for it!

ninja well done on the food front, am another one that prefers to stay in denial most of the time.

meet-up is everyone ok for Monday 7th then? Can we say 1pm so I've more time to leave?

ninja, well now I feel bad. I promise I will cut down on sweets at least. I guess that would be better for Paula anyway.

Thanks for reassurance. Will try to feed Isaac up more during the day. His weight has been constant so I can't have been feeding him too much I guess.

ninja are you doing ww or do you know anywhere good to get recipes? I don't really want to go to meetings and the online subscription is a bit much for me.

lemon have done ww plenty of times in the past, can probably work out your daily points for you if you like? If you sign up to the newsletter on the ww site you get recipes and it's free. Other option is ww cookbooks - I have two so could always type up/photocopy some recipes for you if you like?
Good idea on bulking up during the daytime.

My tip, if you are doing WW, is to use scales. I've done it a couple of times and never lost weight because, I think, I was very laid back about the quantities I ate. It would say 'a matchbox size piece of cheese' and I would picture Cooks Extra Long Matches, rather than the 10p boxes!

Thanks for the ideas re DH scarlotti. It's hard to get the balance right isn't it? I don't want to do too much as I don't think that would be good for either of us. At the same time, I am quite happy at the moment and he is not, so I think maybe the balance isn't quite right. Or maybe I can just deal with stress better at the moment. Like everyone's said, the first few months are early days and it will all change soon anyway.

Well, I feel brill. Just had a visit from a man who is some kind of expert in families affected by mental health problems (ie the problems I had after having DD1) and he was really impressed with us. He said DD1 is very well adjusted, and we have a lovely family life with no problems :D

DD1 has a poorly tummy today though Emmeline is having a nap and DD1 is snuggled up on the settee watching TV. I might bake her a treat with the lovely stuff I treated myself to from waitrose yesterday.

Laugs I could have written your post (minus the bottle of EBM). DD1 and I eat before 6, and DH eats whenever he gets in. This used to be at tea time, but is getting later and later these days as contracts at his work heat up and his allocated time on them diminishes. I used to bath the girls together after tea: wash Isla, get her out, massaged, jammies on, then wash DD1, get her out, toileted, nappy and jammies on, teeth done, and by the time all this was done DH was home and could do story for DD1 whilst I fed Isla. But with him being later and Isla really stuggling once she gets out of the bath I've tended to bath them separately in different nights to try and avoid the screaming banshee bedtime.

DH is still exhausted and stressed, and didn't sleep last night bacause of it. I feel guilty because Isla was up and he got up to settle her 'cos I was so out of it. He didn't manage to get back to sleep for hours.

I can't think what else I can do really. DD1 is over him like a rash when he is home and it's very wearing. Perhaps I don't hand Isla over often enough so that DD1 gets to understand that she has to share his attention too.

Laugs that dinner dilemma used to happen here last year when dh and I both worked full time and he was condensing 5 days into 4 so home much later. Family mealtimes were gahstly with all of us knackered and ds would be going to bed on a full stomach- awful. That idea of Ursi's sounds like a fab solution.

Weightwatchers I know just what you mean re: portion sizes Laugs. I am bad with the points too- I do too many rough guestimates. I thought popcorn at the cinema would be maybe 5 or 6- got home and looked it up only to discover that it's more like 14 aarrgh! I used my points finder thingy on the Jazzies packet and discovered that they are about 12 points per packet too- explains why I have not lost any weight in the last couple of weeks! Lemon I am on 28 points a day- I can sort of remember why, I think it goes by age, height, activity levels, current weight etc: 10 are for bfing, 1 is for being under 5ft 4 , 10 for starting at 10 st (a whisker off 11!!) 1 or maybe 2 for being 35. Can't remember the rest. My mum was doing it so I borrowed her stuff. I don't think you have to go to meetings, I think you can do it all online as Scarlotti said. I have got it written down somewhere so if you can't find the info Scarlotti then I will hunt mine out.
I also find this mantra works: pastry, cheese, chocolate, cakes, crisps and biscuits bad, tomatoey fish stew good
Ninja your butternut squeash soup sounds yummy! Recipe??

Was vv chuffed today as the lovely Health visitor at clinic said I was looking good and had lost weight( so you see they do have their uses after all! ) The downside is that Hedy has also lost weight and crossed the line down to next centile. She's still on the bigger side at 6.5 kg, but less on the bigger side than she was. She is not very interested in milk, unlike ds. He used to sit down for lovely hour long feeds and cry for milk. H doesn't cry for milk but I put her to breast anyway, where she feeds for five or so minutes then gets bored and starts looking around. This is a bit odd isn't it? HV not worried as Hedy is obviously bonny and happy, but it is weird that she is not fussed about food.

Butterpie that sounds like a really positive meeting.

I am obsessed with One Born Every Minute- that woman last night gave birth to her ds EXACTLY the way my ds was born- stirrups, mws pushing my feet, the lot. Happy times!

ghastly not gahstly!!

laugs i so know where you're coming from.. its tough for your DH as it is for you. I agree with Scarlotti there are a few things we can do to give them some time.. I try and put C to bed at 8 ( well 7 but it doesn't work) and make sure DD1 is fed and just needs a bath. He doesn't really mind spending time with her and if he needs some time off he just puts Charlie and lola on for a bit. he only gets in at 7 so he doesn't have long with her. Then we spend the eve together till 10.30pm. I go and feed Charlotte and he gets to bed..not much time a deux but c'est la vie eh???? at night i deal with C. the tough days won't last long..so please don't stress..

ninja jealous of your sleep!!!

hobnob I understand what you mean by handing over ISla.. i should do the same with Charlotte but don't..

Are you:
Female = Score 3
Male = Score 9

Are you a breastfeeding mother?
No = Score 0
Yes, breastfeeding exclusively = Score 10
Yes, supplementing breastfeeding with solid foods = Score 5

How old are you?
16 - 20 = Score 5
21 - 35 = Score 4
36 - 50 = Score 3
51 - 65 = Score 2
Over 65 = Score 1

How many stones do you weigh?
Ignore the lb, the number of stones is your score for this question. Someone who weights 12st 4lb will score 12

How tall are you?
Under 5ft 4ins = Score 1
5ft 4ins or above = Score 2

In your day to day life are you:
Sitting down most of the time = Score 0
Occasionally sitting, but mainly standing = Score 2
Walking most of the time = Score 4
Doing physically hard work most of the time = Score 6

Add all the sections together and thats your daily allowance.

ninjacat and how many points are various foods?

Ninja thank heavens for exclusive breastfeeding! That's half a packet of Jazzies, or even SIX chocolate digestives! Or two muffins with jam!! If you live on tomatoey fish stew and apples for the rest of the day...

Hi all, only just caught up, my we are starting to chat a lot again!

Very of your meet up, Are there any Essex girls out there or Londoners that fancy meeting up?

Dh is pretty good, he lets me have lie-ins at the weekend and baths ds whenever he can and looks after Millie in the evening so I can get ready and go to bed early. However, he is out on the lash tomorrow night, Watching the rugby with a friend on Friday night and Saturday night is staying over at a friends for a boys evening My one night out since having Millie consisted of a chinese with the girls and being home before 11pm to feed Millie! hhhmmmppphh!

ooh, Millie waking, better dash!

sorry, no time to read todays post, hope everyone is ok.
Paula was not sleeping too well this night but fed a lot. Then today a normal feed at 8, a rather small one at 11 and nothing since than. I've tried twice. First time she took a bit but only to vomit it, second time about one sip. I then discovered a little bit of blood in her mouth but as we were out I didn't want to check with my dirty hands. Now at home I can't see anything. She seems to sleep more than usual (not a surprise after that night) and maybe puts her hands in her mouth a bit more often than usual. Could that be teething? But I couldn't see anything. What should I see if she is?
Or does she just refuse feeding because I had a Chili Hot Chocolate?

ursi could be that she had plenty through the night to stop her waking from hunger today while she was catching up on her sleep. I would wake her soon and try to get two feeds in before bed, so that you don't get a repeat of last night and then for it to become a new pattern of behaviour.

helips I can easily get to London for a meet up

DH and I went out for lunch yesterday as it was his birthday. We chatted about how we're both feeling re the relate sessions coming up, and our concerns about how life is at the moment. I feel so much brighter and hopeful today - amazing what a bit of time to focus on each other can do eh?

Am tired again today. DS1 seems to speak to me constantly, about nothing in particular, and it's so draining!!

Oh, and ww portions and points - that is my downfall for sure. I bought a ww scales last time and it weighs things and tells you the points - now that's a shocker!!